Bits of Silmarillion nonsense
So I wound up creating some random bits of Silmarillion inspired weirdness, with Cassie's unashamed encouragement. Some canon, some merely speculative/weird.
Morgoth: Halp? I gives you shinies?
Ungoliant: Yum, shinies. *halps*
Morgoth: Woot!
Ungoliant: MOAR SHINIES!
Morgoth: D: HALP!
Balrogs: *halp*
Valar: We need Silmarils!
Feanor: MINE!
Morgoth: ...actually, mine. :D
Messenger: His.
Feanor: DAMNIT!
Messenger: ...oh, and he killed Finwe.
Feanor: RAAAAAARGH! FEANOR SMASH!
Melian: *stroll*
Thingol: *stare*
Melian: Well hi there.
Thingol: *staaaaaaare*
Melian: *staaaaaaaare*
Elves: ...Um, hadn't we best be getting on?
Thingol: *staaaaaa- blink* Huh. I seem to have lost track of time.
Elves: NO SHIT.
Thingol: You and me, baby? Start a kingdom?
Melian: Yep. :D
Luthien: *twirl*
Beren: *gape* Are you an angel? ...Sorry, that was the worst line ever.
Luthien: *pats cheek* Close, sweetie. That'd be my mother.
Beren: AWESOME.
Beren: ...So I'm Erchamion now.
Maedhros: *glare* Only room for one awesome one-handed guy, and I got there first! YOUR DESCENDANTS WILL RUE THE INDIGNITY. ...But thanks for inspiring me to attack Morgoth again. <3
Beren: Er... you're welcome.
Maedhros: *loses* ASSHOLE.
***
Feanor: ONWARDS! WE MARCH TO VICTORY!
Maglor: ...d'you think Dad remembers this is just a hike?
Maedhros: Shh, he's practicing.
Curufin: ONWARDS! WE MARCH TO -
Maglor: Stop that.
Curufin: *sulk* I'll imitate Dad if I want!
Celegorm: ONWARDS! WE -
Maglor: NO.
Celegorm: *pout* It was cool when Dad did it...
Caranthir: ON-
Maglor: NO!
Caranthir: *seethes artistically*
Maedhros: *opens mouth*
Maglor: *weary* You might as well...
Maedhros: ...Nah. I'll let you do it this time. Army's waiting, bro. This one's for real.
Maglor: ...I will not say it I will not say it... ONWARDS! WE MARCH TO VICTORY!
~~
And that's all for now. I might follow it up with sequel post or posts later if I think of more.
Morgoth: Halp? I gives you shinies?
Ungoliant: Yum, shinies. *halps*
Morgoth: Woot!
Ungoliant: MOAR SHINIES!
Morgoth: D: HALP!
Balrogs: *halp*
Valar: We need Silmarils!
Feanor: MINE!
Morgoth: ...actually, mine. :D
Messenger: His.
Feanor: DAMNIT!
Messenger: ...oh, and he killed Finwe.
Feanor: RAAAAAARGH! FEANOR SMASH!
Melian: *stroll*
Thingol: *stare*
Melian: Well hi there.
Thingol: *staaaaaaare*
Melian: *staaaaaaaare*
Elves: ...Um, hadn't we best be getting on?
Thingol: *staaaaaa- blink* Huh. I seem to have lost track of time.
Elves: NO SHIT.
Thingol: You and me, baby? Start a kingdom?
Melian: Yep. :D
Luthien: *twirl*
Beren: *gape* Are you an angel? ...Sorry, that was the worst line ever.
Luthien: *pats cheek* Close, sweetie. That'd be my mother.
Beren: AWESOME.
Beren: ...So I'm Erchamion now.
Maedhros: *glare* Only room for one awesome one-handed guy, and I got there first! YOUR DESCENDANTS WILL RUE THE INDIGNITY. ...But thanks for inspiring me to attack Morgoth again. <3
Beren: Er... you're welcome.
Maedhros: *loses* ASSHOLE.
***
Feanor: ONWARDS! WE MARCH TO VICTORY!
Maglor: ...d'you think Dad remembers this is just a hike?
Maedhros: Shh, he's practicing.
Curufin: ONWARDS! WE MARCH TO -
Maglor: Stop that.
Curufin: *sulk* I'll imitate Dad if I want!
Celegorm: ONWARDS! WE -
Maglor: NO.
Celegorm: *pout* It was cool when Dad did it...
Caranthir: ON-
Maglor: NO!
Caranthir: *seethes artistically*
Maedhros: *opens mouth*
Maglor: *weary* You might as well...
Maedhros: ...Nah. I'll let you do it this time. Army's waiting, bro. This one's for real.
Maglor: ...I will not say it I will not say it... ONWARDS! WE MARCH TO VICTORY!
~~
And that's all for now. I might follow it up with sequel post or posts later if I think of more.