Dark Angel Big Bang - "Apocalypse Now and Later" Chapter 5
Chapter Five
This time, the valley was silent. No forces of heaven and hell fought, no voices screamed out magic. Beyond the pounding of his pulse, Alec heard the Winchesters stagger to their feet and Angela sobbing quietly.
“Cas? Cas!” Dean called.
Alec managed to sit up and look around. The valley was empty. There was only a small cloud of dust settling around them. Dirt and sand was scuffed up around the valley, but there was no other sign that a battle had happened, that the apocalypse had threatened to start again.
Sam spun in a circle, eyes wide. “Where did he go?”
“Dammit Cas!” Dean threw his hands in the air and let them drop. “Thanks!”
The brother’s voices turned into a buzz and the valley wavered and Alec took a deep breath to get control again. It took several moments for his pummeled senses to sort themselves again. And he realized that Angela was saying something around her sobs.
“Nonononononononono. Come back, come back!” On her stomach, she reached towards the closed Hellgate. “Come back!” She fought to stand up, but her broken arm gave out and she collapsed again. “No, please!” Her entire body started shaking.
Alec shifted to his knees, gently took her shoulders and turned her over so she was propped up against him. “Hey, easy. Angela. It’s over.” He took a deep breath closed his eyes as she continued to struggle and cry in denial. The Winchesters came over to stand next to him. “Easy, Angela.”
Dean bent and got a hand under Angela’s arm. “Come on, let’s get her to the car.”
Sam helped Alec up and stayed close as he swayed, arm wrapped around his ribs. Dean had one arm wrapped around Angela’s waist and supported her broken arm with the other. She sagged in his grip, eyes closed, whimpering as shivers ran through her small frame. “Ready?”
They were less than half way to the car when Angela groaned and staggered to a stop. Her shivering increased.
“Okay, I’m gonna pick you up, and you’re gonna be okay with it,” Dean said and shifted to get his arm under her knees.
She whimpered and continued to shake. “N-no. Make it s-stop. Make it-t stop.” She gulped hard, eyes fluttering but unfocused. “I need it. Meg. I need it.”
Sam’s breath hitched and Alec saw the color drain out of his face. “Oh, god, no. She’s detoxing.”
Dean struggled to hold her as she struggled and shivered. “Already? How-?”
“Increased metabolism,” Alec panted.
Angela screamed and twisted in Dean’s grip, body fighting against the hold and the pain of the detox. “Make it stop!”
Sam rushed forward and grabbed Angela to help Dean lower her to the ground. “We can’t take her in the car like this, she’ll break herself and it.”
“Tie her up?” Dean suggested.
“Better be strong - takes a bit to keep an X-5 down,” Alec said, dropping to his knees at Angela’s head and pulled her into his lap. As she continued to convulse and cry, he muttered, “Fuck, this is worse than the shakes.”
After a moment, Angela’s tremors slowed, and she blinked, coherency filtering back into her gaze. She caught Alec’s eyes and whispered, “Please. End it. Make it stop.”
He grimaced and said quietly, “I don’t have tryp’ or demon blood. I can’t fix it. You need to fight it.”
She let out a sound somewhere between a sob and laugh. “I’m too tired. Too broken. I can’t fight it.”
“No, you are stronger than this.” Sam was there suddenly, his big hands gentle on Angela’s face. “Trust me, I know. I know how it feels to have that power and then to get this sick from it. Just - you just have to fight it, and be stronger than it. Because you are.”
She shook her head, tears leaking out of the corner of her eyes. “No. No, I’m not.”
“Angela, you have to listen to me, I know exactly what you’re going through, I was there too!” Sam’s voice turned desperate as her tremors started again.
She ignored him and looked at Alec. “I can’t. I have no one. And it hurts too much. That blood did something t-to me. It m-made me strong, b-but it burned me up. T-there’s nothing left-t.”
He knew what she was telling him, what she wanted. But he couldn’t. She wasn’t Max, but it didn’t stop him from seeing her in Angela’s face. And he couldn’t take that step. “What about that guy and the kid? Don’t you want to stick around for them?”
Her head lolled erratically, pulled around by her denial and pain. “Left-t me. T-too dangerous for them. B-better without me.”
Dean flinched but did not speak.
Angela stared up at Alec. “Please.”
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then he looked up at the brothers. “The Cage is shut? They can’t touch her?”
“I don’t think Raphael and his gang will be back,” Sam said quietly. “There’s no way they’re trying that again. The Cage was never opened, so you’re both fine.”
Alec nodded and swallowed hard. “You sure?” he asked her.
She nodded a faint smile touching her mouth before another tremor wracked her body. “Please. I can’t do this anymore.”
“Okay.” He smoothed her hair and slipped a hand behind her neck, cradling her head, breathing as erratic as hers.
Her shivers crept towards a full seizure. “It’s okay, Alec,” she gasped. “Please.”
“Okay,” he said again, no breath or strength to the word as she continued to shake in his arms. “Easy, Angela. It’s over.” His hand clenched, arm jerked once; there was a crack and Angela fell lax against him with a soft sigh. “It’s over.”
Dean swore, stood and strode away.
Sam rocked back on his heels, any color in his face gone, eyes glimmering with tears. “Oh, no. Why?” he breathed.
Alec slipped out from under her and started walking across the desert. He could feel the burn of the sun on his skin, the flare of pain in his ribs. But at the same time, he felt nothing. He was numb. His hand had broken Angela’s neck, and something in his core had shattered at the same instant. The world rushed in at him, swirling like water. His blood rushed in his head, loud and insistent. He felt the ground slip away from his feet; what could have been Dean’s voice called out across the void that swallowed him. And then darkness took over.
*
The moon shone down on a crossroads in the middle of America sometime in 2009, in a time and place where the Winchester brothers had fought and beaten the Apocalypse once, a step away from another timeline where they had done it again. And Castiel was meeting Crowley again. And he was furious.
“What kind of move was that?” he demanded. “That spell nearly ripped the very fabric of time and space. And that explosion did unimaginable damage to that time line.”
Crowley rolled his eyes. “You sound like something out of Doctor Who, do shut up.” He ignored the glare Castiel gave him. “Didn’t you read the history of that time line? There was supposed to be a massive explosion. Everyone said it was an EM pulse. Turns out it was just spells collapsing.” He shrugged. “Time hasn’t been changed or ripped or whatnot.”
“You didn’t even consult me about that move. What else are you not telling me?”
“Castiel, we are partners in this endeavor, not married. I don’t have to tell you everything before I do it. That move was beneficial for all of us, was it not? So don’t be a baby about it.” He snapped his fingers and disappeared.
For several long minutes, Castiel stayed in the crossroads, fists clenched and breath harsh. Then he flew off as well. But he couldn’t shake the feeling that his plans were unraveling and getting completely out of control.
*
The drive back to Terminal City was silent; even Dean couldn’t force it away with classic rock. Alec sat in the back seat, head against the cool glass, staring out at the landscape but not seeing it. The black pit that had opened in his chest when he had killed Angela had not faded with time and distance. He kept hearing Max’s voice, spilling out the story of Ben, remembered the pain he’d endured in Pys-Ops while being told his clone was an insane murderer. And he had just murdered Angela. He was under no orders, no threat. He had made that decision on his own, out of pity. But that was hardly enough of a reason.
When they stopped to sleep for the night, no one managed much more than a few hours. Nightmares haunted them all, and if one wasn’t woken by the dreams, then he’d wake up from one of the other’s screams. He wasn’t sure what the brothers saw, but he kept seeing himself killing Max. She’d be mangled and torn up, and he would kill her, snap her neck without thought or remorse. Every time he closed his eyes, the scene played again and again until he swore off sleep entirely.
They were all exhausted when they finally arrived in TC. Alec almost didn’t get out of the car when he saw the crowd of people that had rushed into the courtyard at the sound of the old car. He sat with his forehead pressed against the back of the passenger seat, shoulder slumped. He blinked and looked up when someone rapped on the window.
Dean looked down at him, a steady mask in place over his own exhaustion, but understanding clear in his eyes. He opened the door and said quietly. “Come on, kid. There’s a big mutt out here looking for you.”
Alec blinked slowly again and then got out of the car. Joshua rushed forward with a wide smile and his arms spread. Alec braced himself, the burn of his still healing ribs running through his side. Dean stepped up again, and put a hand on Joshua’s arm. “Easy, big guy. He’s got some busted ribs.”
Joshua stopped and looked wildly through the crowd. “Where is Doc Fraiser? Someone find the Doc for Alec,” he said firmly.
Alec groaned as he saw Dalton and Jude dive away towards the med wing. “I’m fine, Josh. Just have to heal on my own.”
“Good. Come back to the apartment and rest. Get better.”
As much as he wanted to, Alec couldn’t. The crowd wouldn’t let him. They pressed around him and the Winchesters, snapping off questions, offering happy welcomes and other questions. He could see the edges of the Winchesters’ masks wearing thin; they didn’t want this attention any more than he did.
Max appeared out of the crowd, and Alec had to bite back a sob. She was not broken like in his dreams, and she was certainly not Angela. She was alive - worn and tired, yes - but so very alive. She stopped at the edge of the crowd and took in the whole.
“Alright, everyone back to work!” she bellowed. “You’ve all said hello, and he’s not going anywhere. We all have things to do! So do it!”
As the crowd dispersed, urged by Mole, who took over the shouting, and the brothers stayed with Joshua, Alec smiled and walked over to Max.
“I almost thought you were going to end with ‘bip, bip!’ for a second, Maxie.”
She shrugged. “Naw, that’s Normal’s thing.” Then she smiled. “It’s good to have you back, Alec.”
“It’s good to be back.” He took a deep breath. “How has everything been?”
She shrugged. “No one’s starving, everyone’s got a place to sleep, and the government isn’t going to kill us anytime soon.” She caught his gaze. “How did it go for you?”
“Oh, you know. Saved the world. Met some interesting people.” He swallowed. “Max, Angela didn’t make it. She was hurting, bad, and she asked me to end it. So I did.”
He watched as the words hit her like a hammer blow, but she recovered quickly. “Alec… you can’t let this carry with you. Cuz it will eat you up inside. Okay? And I need you to be here.”
“No promises,” he said quietly. “But I’ll be here, okay?”
“Thank you,” she whispered.
“Hey, Alec!” Dean called before walking across the courtyard. “Sam and I need to get back to our own timeline-”
“Don’t look at me for help,” he said with a half grin.
Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, because you are completely worthless in that area. But Sam’s going to look at some paintings, I need to prep the spell, and you still have stuff in the car. Come on, I’ll help you and you can help me. Won’t hurt you to learn a little bit more about spell work.”
“If you say so.”
Max held out her hand to Dean. “Thanks. For doing what you did. And for making sure he got his stupid ass back here.” She nodded to Alec.
Dean took her hand and grinned. “If I had someone like you back here, I’d make it back, too.”
She glared at him, and Dean smirked back and went to the car. “What you waiting for, Alec? I’m not carrying all of your junk.”
They dropped Alec’s duffle off and were setting up the spell components around the car before Dean spoke of anything other than pointless small talk.
“I heard what Max said to you earlier. And it’s true.”
Alec raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything, putting a small pile of moonstones at one quarter of the circle.
“You did what you had to do, kid. And you have a job to do. You can’t let it stop you.”
Alec snorted. “Sure. I’ll just keep going, even though I am one step closer to a monster I swore I’d never become. I killed enough people when I was forced to, when I was a soldier. What I did to Angela… Do you know how it feels to be a monster?”
“Yeah. Yeah I do. And so does Sammy. But you know what? We’ve made bad choices. We paid for them, are still paying for them. But you find a reason to keep moving. And you’ve got it here.”
“Alec needs rest!” Joshua’s voice boomed across the courtyard.
Dean and Alec turned to see Sam and Joshua heading their way. Dean shook his head. “Still think some of Sammy’s DNA is in that big guy. Makes perfect sense.”
“Don’t worry, Josh, almost done here.”
With a heartfelt smile, Joshua shook hands with Sam and headed back inside. “Going to make mac and cheese! And little hot dogs!” he called back.
Sam smiled and turned to Alec, expression becoming serious. “Take care of yourself, okay, Alec?” he said as they shook hands. The grin quirked back to life. “Dean give you a big brother talk?”
“Uh, yeah he did.”
“Figured. The idiot can’t take his own advice, most days, but he’s not an idiot.”
“Sammy! Let’s go!”
“Relax, Dean! You can’t pronounce the Enochian well enough to leave me here.” He turned back to Alec and said. “Take care of yourself. You helped save the world. Just think what you can do here.”
Alec stood in the courtyard for a long time after the Impala disappeared in a flash of white light. The cold, misty rain of Seattle beaded in his hair and on his jacket. He didn’t hear Max come out and stand next to him, but he felt her hand on his shoulder and turned.
“You gonna be okay?” she asked quietly.
He took a deep breath. “Yeah. Yeah. We’ve got work to do. Let’s go.”
Fin.
Master Post
Chapter 4