Must Be Dreaming, Part TEN!!!
Greatest thanks (and you should thank her too) toherohunter, without whom you would likely have to wait three more weeks for this update, or perhaps more because I would have lost my sanity over the past month without her. :P!
Title: Must Be Dreaming
Series/WIP: Sequel to So Much Dreaming
Pairing: Clex!
Rating: PG-13
Summary: After being abducted by aliens and discovering that Jonathan Kent is alive, Lex must come to grips with his shifting relationship with Clark and an unexpected pregnancy.
Spoilers: Through S5, after Cyborg.
Warnings: MPREG!!
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter 5.1
Chapter 5.2
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Part Ten
The lights were too bright, and the air was too cold. Lex paced back and forth in the waiting room, trying to keep breathing and not to faint. It was the same wild rush of panic he’d felt earlier that year when Clark had been shot. Same racing heart, prickling terror up and down his scalp, and tightness in his chest. Only Clark was Clark. Miracles happened around Clark. Lex had felt him gone, then felt him back again.
Lena wasn’t Clark. Lena was frail and all too mortal, and Lex wasn’t sure that he’d ever be able to talk to her again. He could barely catch his breath.
Suddenly strong hands were on him, guiding him somewhere and making him sit. He looked up to see Mercy watching him, and Chloe was kneeling before him and pressing a warm mug of something into his hands. He drank it without thinking or even tasting it, feeling only his heart beating at a pace that it surely couldn’t keep up.
There were people coming in and out, talking to Maureena, giving her and the children soothing words, holding her. Lex leaned on his knees, feeling like he had to put something between the world and his baby, lest this one be taken from him too. Some time later after the warm liquid was gone, Lex looked up to see a doctor coming up to them. He set the mug aside and stood immediately, although he couldn’t focus on her words for several moments.
“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” Lex asked. His tongue flicked out over his lips.
“Sir, we’ve stopped the bleeding for now, but she’s really not looking good. If you’d like to go in and see her… there might not be a lot of time.”
”I want to see her records,” Lex ordered.
The doctor looked startled. “Sir, you can’t-“
“I want to see them,” he repeated sternly. “Have you let my doctors have a look?”
“Wait, wait!” Mareena argued. Her kids clustered around her. “What are you gonna do?”
Lex gave them both a fierce glare. “I’m not going to accept that she’s dead until she’s dead. If my doctors can help her-“
“You aren’t her family, Mr. Luthor,” the doctor said, gently. “You can’t make decisions for her.”
“No, but I got her power of attorney,” Maureena said, putting a hand on her wide hip. “Let him try. Talk to his doctors. Whatever you gotta do to save her!”
Then one of her children burst into tears again, and Lex was suddenly reminded of Maddie. He wondered if she would have wanted to be here.
They were led through the halls of the hospital, and he spotted one of his employees standing outside of Lena’s hospital room with a few other doctors. He nodded to Maureena as she walked into the room and then joined the doctor.
“Talk to me, Dr. Ngugi,” Lex ordered.
The man held up some lab reports, booming in his deep voice, “Sir, I’ve noticed an irregularity in her blood work. I’ve never seen-“
“That’s familiar. That… how is that possible?” Lex grabbed the papers and began looking them over.
“I do not know, Mr. Luthor, but I’ve sent for our reserves in the lab. They should be here in ten minutes, if she can hold on.”
“And then,” Lex asked urgently. “Will it work?”
The man shook his head. “We have no way of knowing. Her blood type might be close enough for this treatment to save her instead of killing her.”
“She’s dying anyway,” Lex argued. Dr. Ngugi gave a deep nod in agreement. Lex took an uneasy breath. His eyes drifted over to the room where Mareena and her children were visiting with Lena. It was so easy for Lex to look at the Slums, his family’s past, as though they held absolutely nothing of value. It was actually more comfortable to think of it that way. His grandmother had been a drunk, and his grandfather had been an abusive drunk and a thief. His father was little more than an inhuman collection of will-to-power urges parading around in a business suit. But the people who had been coming in and out to comfort Mareena had been part of a real community, almost a family. They genuinely went out of their way to take care one another and that in itself was the most alien thing that Lex had ever witnessed.
And that was saying a lot.
As the doctor walked away to make sure that the treatment went through, Lex stepped into the room where Lena was hooked up to many machines and still fighting as they monitored her. He closed his eyes, feeling tears escaping, and he could not care enough to wipe them away. Deeply, he breathed in and out, trying to feel. Trying to feel love and support like he never had before. She’d pick that up from him, and he hoped that it would help her come back. Help her know that she needed to wake up.
Again, strong hands were on him, helping him into a chair, and he opened his eyes to see Mercy again, who seemed unsettled, but her jaw was firm. “Fainted, boss.”
“I didn’t…”
Maureena was rubbing his back, and she gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I know it’s hard, honey. We all love her.”
Lex nodded, but he knew that it was different. They all loved Lena, but her friends and family from the Slums loved each other, too. Outside of Lena, he didn’t have that. Lex leaned on his hand and watched her, waiting. Waiting. Waiting.
Eventually Maureena left, taking her children with her, and she told Lex that she didn’t want them to be there, just in case, so she would be heading back to the hotel to wait with her family.
“Where is Lena’s mother?” Lex asked.
“Outta town, and dad’s in prison, so there probably won’t be anyone else coming in, except some people from the neighborhood to say their goodbyes,” Maureena told him, heading for the door. “Nana Nan will probably come. She was like a mother to Elena.”
Again, something hot was pressed into his hands. He took a sip and set it down. There were concerned whispers behind him. All Lex could do was focus on breathing and trying to make her feel how much he wanted her to open her eyes.
Later when Dr. Ngugi had returned, and he began speaking to them, Lex couldn’t understand him. All he could hear was the pounding of his own head and the beep of the machine monitoring Lena as they administered treatment.
“Please…” he heard himself say. A hand touched his shoulder, and he instinctively shrugged it off.
“-all we can do is watch and wait. Are you sure about the treatment that you gave her?”
“I… no. All I know is that it could save her life. Her blood type is quite rare, you know.”
“I’ve never seen anything like it, Mr. Luthor,” the doctor agreed, and then he paused. “Well. I’ve seen it in one other case…”
“I’m aware,” Lex acknowledged sharply.
They were silent for a moment, and Lex placed his hand on his chest, trying to breathe. Once they’d finished, he stood and moved his chair closer to the bed. He stared at the blood in the IV drip, and then he took her hand, and loved her with all the strength he had in him.
***
“There are things about Lena that you don’t know,” Martha said empathically. She kept her voice low so that Maddie would not overhear them and get upset. She and Clark had gone into the kitchen on the mission of making some banana nut pancakes, while Jonathan had taken Maddie under his wing and put on some movies. All they could do was hope to distract her and keep her calm until they received a call.
However, Clark and his mother still couldn’t be in a room together without arguing.
Clark sighed. “Mom, how would you know anything about Lena?”
“I work with high up people now, Clark, and you hear things,” she said vaguely, shucking off her suit jacket and walking over to get a bowl. “It’s not that I have anything against her really, I just think that Lex needed to have a bit of forethought before he decided to bring a child into his home.”
“Yeah, because you and dad had so much forethought that you gave me your maiden name,” Clark retorted, rolling his eyes.
“Oh, hush, Clark. I’d thought of that before we ever laid eyes on you.” Martha pulled some buttermilk and eggs out of the refrigerator and then set them on the counter.
Clark reached into the refrigerator and grabbed a block of cheese, breaking off a piece and staring at it a moment before putting it in his mouth. “So what ‘things’ about Lena don’t I know? She’s a busybody for sure, but I don’t think she means anyone harm. In fact, I’d guess she got up in my face the other day because she wants to help us, not for any other reason. And Maddie seems to feel safe around her. She won’t say a word around Lois, Lana, or even you.”
Martha sighed and began cracking the eggs and dropping them into the bowl. “Honey… Look. I don’t want to be so negative, but word in the upper circles is that she’s a… prostitute.”
Clark was glad that he didn’t need to breathe as much as humans, because he choked on the piece of cheese he was eating and had to spend several minutes trying to get it back out of his throat before he could reply. “Are you fucking kidding me, Mom??”
“Clark!” Martha turned around. “Language!”
“Maybe you should check your language! Where did you hear that?”
“I told you. Around work. I suppose it’s a credit to her that she’s… serviced such rich clients, but I just can’t condone having a woman like that around a child!”
Clark wiped his mouth and said flatly, “She’s not a prostitute.”
“Clark-“
“You heard wrong, Mom.” Clark stood and tossed his napkin in the trash. “And I’d’ve expected more of you than to just listen to gossip like that.”
“I didn’t realize that you knew her so well.” Martha turned back to the bowl and began to stir as she shook her head. “You know that Lex has a tendency to run with a…less than respectable crowd. Is this such a stretch of the imagination?”
Clark paused for several moments. “Lex is a scarily good judge of character. If Lena’s a prostitute, then she’s a hooker with a heart of gold. Knowing Lex, she probably has some kind of gift or talent that makes her special.”
He walked over to put the skillet on the stove before continuing. “Maybe she’s just a really good person, or she makes Lex laugh, but Lex would never associate with someone who didn’t have any value, and I don’t mean just ‘less than respectable’ poor people and sluts. I mean useless upper class idiots, too. You think Lex doesn’t have any friends just because he’s bald or weird? He’s a billionaire. People are going to flock to him no matter how messed up he is. He just isn’t going to spend any time with them if he doesn’t think they have anything to contribute to the world.”
“I’m aware of that. He was obviously attracted to you because he did believe you had something. Are you forgetting the room that Lex kept on you?” Martha started to cut in some slices of banana.
“That’s not really fair.”
“I think it’s relevant, at least. Maddie has a special ability, and he snatched her up like a piece for his collection. Don’t you find that alarming?” she asked, tilting her head slightly.
Clark crossed his arms. “No. You didn’t hear Lex when he was talking to Maddie. They really do have a connection, and powers or not, I think he just wants to protect her from having to be both a freak and alone like he had to be growing up. When did this start being about you not liking Lex?”
“I like Lex. I just don’t know if I trust him. He’s… you know that he’s changed since he got the company. You know that, Clark.”
“Yeah. And I’ve changed too. And so have you. And dad. Because that’s what people do. But I don’t think that he’s changed into some kind of monster, like you apparently think!”
Martha gave him a stern look.
“Mom, you’re wrong. And even more, it’s not your place to judge him. You’re not his mother, and you’re not Maddie’s mother. You need to butt out.” Clark stood up straight and sighed. “I have to go see them. Are you guys gonna be okay to look after Maddie without me?
“I think that mutant butler that came with her should be able to help, if nothing else. Are you and Lex talking again?” she asked, dropping some butter into the skillet.
“Well, not really. But I can’t let Lex go through this alone. Whoever Lena is, she’s really important to Lex, and I don’t think he does that well when people he loves get hurt.” Clark stepped toward the door. “I don’t know if he’ll want me there, but I’m gonna be there for him if he needs me.”
Martha sighed and shook her head as she poured the batter into the skillet.
Clark walked out into the living room where Maddie had fallen asleep in Jonathan’s arms. The movie was still playing, but Jonathan was paying more attention to the sleeping child. Clark smiled warmly, remembering the few times he was allowed to stay up late when he was a kid.
“Hey,” he said softly, walking towards them.
Jonathan lifted his head. “How’d that go?”
“Mom has lost her mind.” Clark sat by them and petted Maddie’s brow gently. “She thinks Lena is a hooker.”
Jonathan creased his brow. “What?”
“That’s what she said. I can’t believe it.” Clark sighed.
“I’ll try to talk to her again.”
“See, Dad, I don’t think it’s just Lena. I think that Mom still doesn’t trust Lex, so she’s willing not to believe in him. But if you guys aren’t gonna take in Maddie-and believe me, I get why you don’t take in all the stray mutant kids-you can’t really say that much when someone else does. And Lex isn’t that bad at taking care of kids.”
“You’ve seen him with kids?”
“No, well. Ryan. He was pretty good with Ryan even when Ryan was being rude to Lex. But with me. Lex never let any of his Metropolis friends around me much, and I remember the girls he used to date, but I never got to know them because he wouldn’t let them talk to me for long. I barely got to set eyes on Helen.”
Jonathan rubbed his mouth. “True. When you got on Red K for the first time, he came straight to us, to make sure you were taken care of. I think he fancies the idea of being a big brother. There’s something protective in his nature. I always figured that was why he and Lana had a relationship at all. ‘Cause she let him do for her.”
Clark nodded with a slight frown. Maddie was stirring a little at their voices, and Clark waited until she was looking up at him to speak. “Hey, Maddie. Getting tired?”
“Have you heard anything about Lena?” she asked. Her eyes were still puffy from crying.
Clark’s heart hurt for her. The girl had lost too much already. “No, I haven’t. But I’m gonna go to the hospital to check up on her and Lex.”
“Oh my God, Clark, Lex was so sad,” she said in a small voice, then she swallowed tensely.
“Mom’s making you some banana pancakes for a late dinner, and I’ll be back as soon as I can. But I want you to stay calm, okay? I’ll try to help Lex be less sad.”
“Good, because he needs you. “ Maddie yawned widely and looked around. “Where’s Domovoi?”
Clark lifted his head and scanned the walls. “He’s outside. It looks like he’s… securing the perimeter or something. I thought he was a butler. Is he part of Lex’s security?”
“He’s something. Lex said he was trained up north by some guy named Alfred. I dunno,” Maddie shrugged. “You should go be with Lex now.”
Clark smiled and nodded. Impulsively, he leaned over and gave her a kiss on the forehead. “I’ll call as soon as I know anything.”
Maddie nodded and snuggled into Jonathan’s arms. The older man hugged her tightly and looked to his son. “Clark, remember your cell phone. We want to be able to call you just in case.”
“I’ve got it.” Clark pulled it out of his pocket. He sighed deeply. “Okay. Going now. See you later Dad. Hang in there Maddie.” He leaned over to give her a hug before he headed outside. Once there, he sped off to Metropolis.
The trip only took a few seconds. At least to get there. Getting into the hospital was another matter, and getting to see Lena. The nurse at the front desk blocked him. So he waited there for a moment before zipping around the desk and looking through her book. She looked up and blinked, wondering if the guy had actually moved or not. Clark smiled charmingly down at her, then stepped away from the desk and scanned around for Chloe, who should be out here, last he’d heard.
No Chloe. Hm. Clark sharpened his eyes and ears and tried to find Lex. Focusing in a way that he hadn’t bothered to do in a long time, he listened for Lex’s heartbeat as he looked through the walls to find the room number where Lena was supposed to be. Oh! There it was. The lively whooshing of Lex’s heartbeat. And then another one, faster and more fluttering.
He turned his head in that direction and saw the skeletons walking by. There was one tall one outside the room, and inside, two skeletons on the bed… three. There was a little skeleton inside the body on the right. Clark felt his eyes prick with tears.
“Oh, Lena’s baby is alive!” he whispered to himself, so grateful that the news had been wrong. He didn’t know her well, but he wouldn’t wish that kind of pain on anyone. And Lex might not ever get over her miscarrying his baby. He looked at the small bones of the fetus and sighed. So fragile. Clark walked out of sight, then in the blink of an eye, he was deep inside the hospital. He walked up to the person who had been standing outside the room, who unsurprisingly turned out to be Mercy.
“Clark,” she said seriously. Her eyes were lined and worried. She had likely been watching out for Lex the whole night.
“I want to go in,” he told her. “Is it okay?”
“Like they’re gonna stop us,” she replied. “We got permission from the woman who holds her power of attorney.”
“Where’s Chloe?”
“Getting some dinner for Lex. He’s too upset about this to think about eating,” Mercy explained. “Don’t go in there and aggravate him, Clark. He has enough on him right now.”
“I didn’t come for that, Mercy. I came just in case he needed someone to lean on. Okay?”
She nodded briskly and stepped away from the door so that he could enter. Clark smiled a little. It was good to see Lex’s employees actually taking care of him. Clark stepped through the door and raked his eyes over the bed. He blinked.
Lena was on the left. Lex was on the right. He narrowed his eyes and looked at them again with the x-ray. Again, the little fetus. On the right. Inside Lex. Inside. Lex.
Omigod!! Clark felt a panic breaking out all over his body. How had he not known?!
“Oh, Lex…” The words escaped from his mouth, and Lex looked up from the bed. He rolled over and slipped off the bed, rubbing his eyes for a moment and steadying himself. Clark couldn’t drag his eyes away from that little bulge under Lex’s shirt, which Lex had obviously been too preoccupied to retuck properly. Clark looked again and stared in amazement at the tiny baby moving inside Lex. Real. Alive.
This explained so much.
When Lex approached him, Clark wrapped his arms around Lex’s shoulders and hugged him tightly. Lex stiffened, as Clark expected him to, but very quickly, Lex’s arms came up around him.
“Sorry,” Clark whispered. All the bits and pieces were crashing in on Clark now. That tiny sound that had been inside Lex, his illness, Chloe’s research, the abduction. “I’m so sorry, Lex. I’m so sorry.”
“She…”
“Lena lost her baby?”
Lex’s head nodded, then curled into Clark’s shoulder. Clark rubbed his back soothingly, and Lex looked up a bit groggily. His eyes were red-rimmed and had nine-foot shadows underneath. He looked so, so weary. “I spend too much time in hospitals,” he said in a gravelly voice.
“Heh. You really do.”
Lex pulled back, and Clark let his arms drop. Lex rubbed his eyes again and cast a distressed look over to Lena in the bed. Clark couldn’t begin to imagine how Lex felt about her losing her baby. How he was feeling about himself and his baby.
“I’m sorry,“ Clark said again.
Lex looked back at him, his expression open, mostly from fatigue. “Clark, I… I overreacted.”
“No, you didn’t. You’ve warned me a couple of times, and I keep saying that I can do this… but I can’t.” Clark winced at the harsh look Lex gave to him. “I just keep hurting you, Lex, and everything I do is wrong. I try to be someone who you can trust, but I can’t trust people, and I thought I was doing okay, you know? I wanted to stay away and give you some air because the fighting is just too much, but that was wrong, too.”
“And what am I supposed to do with that?” Lex asked softly. “Pretend it doesn’t hurt when you assume I’m a monster?”
“No. I don’t know.” Clark stepped closer to him and put his hands on Lex’s shoulders. “It’s me that needs the work. I know you aren’t a monster, but… I’m so sorry.”
Lex sighed and took Clark’s hand. “Thank you for being here.”
Clark put his hand over Lex’s and pressed his lips together.
“She’s… She’s improving. I don’t know if she’ll live. We gave her-” Lex shook his head and looked back at her again. “Clark…”
Clark could only smile. His Lex. So intense when he was in love. “I know she means a lot to you.”
“She does,” Lex admitted. “I’d like for you to get to know her, Clark, if she wakes up. I don’t know what your mom has against her-“
“My mom should butt out of it,” Clark said sharply. No way he was going to repeat what his mother had said while Lex was looking like he might break down. Lex’s lips spread slightly, and Clark looked at him hopefully. “Are we trying again?”
“I really need for there to be some kind of stability in our relationship. I don’t mean to keep riding you, but I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t need it,” Lex said in a soft, but insistent voice.
Clark puffed himself up. “Well, then call me Mr. Reliable.”
“I’ll keep my standards low.”
Clark couldn’t help but laugh. “This is all I can do, Lex. Just know I’m trying, okay?”
“I will, but… I can’t promise a rational reaction to anything right now.”
“Don’t worry about that. Um, Lex,” Clark ventured tentatively. Lex nodded and frowned seriously. Clark looked down again, trying not to obviously stare at Lex’s baby… Gosh, she was so cute! “Lena seems like a nice girl, and I think she really does care about you, so… I’ll try to get along with her as much as I can. I’m sure this one will turn out better than your other girlfriends.”
Lex tilted his head and skewed his brows. His tongue darted out over his lips as he began to twist the corners upward. “Girlfriend?”
“I wish you’d told me sooner, but....” Clark blushed a little. “It’s your business, I guess. I’m glad she makes you happy.”
Lex burst out laughing. He covered his mouth and bent over, holding onto Clark’s shoulder with one hand as he shook.
“What are you laughing about?” Clark asked in a high voice.
“Oh, God, Clark, why didn’t you just ask?” Lex wiped his eyes. “That’s fantastic. Thanks for the laugh. I really needed one with everything that’s been going on.”
“Okay, well, good for you. But I’m officially confused. She’s not your girlfriend?”
The smile didn’t fade. “No, she isn’t.” He wiped his eyes and leaned against the wall, taking a deep breath. “Actually… see, Clark, she alive right now because I gave her some of my blood.”
“You what?” Clark demanded. Lex moved to the side swiftly when Clark jerked forward. He took a breath and tried to calm himself, mentally giving himself a slap for accidentally intimidating his friend. Clark had assaulted Lex twice this year, and now that he was pregnant, that had to be causing him some anxiety for the safety of the baby. God, how worried he must have been when Maddie’s father had attacked him! “Lex, you’re… you’ve been sick. Should you really be giving blood?”
Lex raised a brow a bit defensively. “I had it shipped over from one of my labs.”
“Oh.” Clark turned his head, feeling dumb. He looked up again when he felt Lex’s hand on his arm.
“I appreciate your concern.” Lex took a breath. “Anyway, as I was saying, I gave her some of my blood.”
”Yeah?” Clark frowned. “And?”
“And… well, I thought that no one in the world matched my blood type, Clark. Believe me, I’ve looked.” Lex licked his lips slowly and looked up at Clark. His voice softened, and he sounded so very hopeful. “I think she’s my sister.”
Clark’s mouth opened, and he blinked dumbly for several moments before he found himself escorting Lex to a chair and sitting down beside him, rubbing his neck and shoulders with one hand. Lex wouldn’t be leaving Lena’s side, and he wouldn’t be leaving Lex’s.
***
When Chloe entered the hospital room with a few bags of food, Lex was still staring in abject grief at Lena, and Clark was sitting behind him, holding him tenderly, with a hand resting lightly on the back of his neck. She traded a glance with Mercy as she handed the woman a sandwich.
“I got some soup for Lex, with the sandwiches; I figured that might be easier to force on him if he stays so out of it- when did Clark get here?” she rattled off in a low voice.
“Little while ago. He’s been behaving, and I think it’s helping Lex to have him here.” Mercy shrugged. “I have to head back to LuthorCorp, shower, change, and make sure things go smooth until this is sorted out one way or another. Can you keep an eye on them?”
“Yeah.” Chloe’s eyes fixed on the image of the two men huddled together. “If Lex and Clark are getting along, Clark can probably make sure that Lex calms down a little. I thought my heart would leap out of my chest when he fainted.”
“Blood pressure, probably. Or stress,” Mercy decided.
“Should I call Tanaka? It feels like we should have someone checking his blood pressure, sugars, you know.”
Mercy thinned her lips. “We can get someone here just as easily. I’ll call Rujuko. The girl should be in Metropolis about now for her classes. She’s closer, and frankly, gentler.”
“Good idea.” Chloe reached over and patted Mercy’s arm gently. “You go. I’ll make sure they don’t erupt in an unsightly display of domestic violence.”
Mercy reached behind Chloe’s head and pulled the girl close to her, giving her a kiss on the forehead. Chloe closed her eyes and sighed, and then Mercy told her softly, “Stay amazing, Chlo.”
Chloe crossed her arms and watched the tall woman depart before she headed into the room and walked up to Clark. She touched his shoulder gently. Clark jerked, and he turned to look at her, although Lex didn’t seem to have noticed her arrival. She wasn’t surprised.
“Chloe!” Clark whispered. He met her eye with a bit of a frown, looked back to Lex, then told him he’d be just a moment. Lex made a noise of acknowledgement, but didn’t turn his head. He was clutching Lena’s limp hand.
Chloe and Clark stepped out of the room and Chloe held up her bag. “I brought some food. I know he’s kind of upset, but it’s already been too long since he’s eaten.”
“You should have told me, Chloe,” Clark said in a firm, deep voice.
Chloe blinked. “Just did. Food time.”
“Not about that. About…” Clark turned his head to look at Lex then made a motion with his hands as though he were rubbing and invisible basketball over his stomach.
“Clark, you have many abilities, but the zen of the mime, you do not. What the hell is that supposed to be?” Chloe asked, narrowing her eyes in confusion.
Clark rolled his eyes and leaned over. “I know about his little stowaway.”
“His… what? Clark, what are you- oh. Right. Well…” She licked her lips and looked away. “We’ve been over this. Privacy. Gotta have it? Now move so I can get babydaddy some food!”
“He gets hurt so much.” Clark scrunched up his face. “You should have told me, so I could protect him. This would have changed everything!”
“Why should it?” Chloe asked. “We both know that Milton Fine did this. He- oh, Clark.”
Clark turned back to Lex, where she was pointing, to see him slumping over. He blurred over to Lex’s side, to Chloe’s shock, and pushed him up.
“Clark, what are you doing?” Lex asked, looking up at him with shining eyes. He’d just been bowing his head over her.
Clark’s brows tented, and he leaned in to hug him. “Sorry. I was… sorry.”
“You don’t have to keep apologizing,” Lex told him. He bowed his head again and wiped his eyes.
“Lex, I brought something to eat,” Chloe said gently. She set the bag down on Clark’s chair and pulled out a Styrofoam bowl. “You up for this?”
“He’ll eat it,” Clark said in an authoritative tone. He moved the bag and sat next to Lex again, taking the bowl from Chloe and opening it up. “Chicken noodle? Mmmm. With veggies! Rice, potatoes, carrots…” Clark dipped the spoon into the soup and held up to Lex’s mouth.
Lex quirked a brow. “Seriously.”
“Lex, you need to eat something. The b- to keep your strength up. You look exhausted!” Clark dismayed. Chloe rubbed Clark’s shoulders. “Chloe, could you get them to bring a cot in here?”
“A cot?” Lex reached over and took the bowl from Clark with a frown. “I can feed myself. Give me the spoon.”
Clark smiled a little. “You need some real sleep, too.”
Lex took a large spoonful and began to eat the soup with a worried frown as he continued watching Lena.
“I’ll go ask for a cot. There’s juice in there, Lex,” Chloe informed him. “You eat something too, Clark.”
Clark nodded and reached into the bag. He picked up another bowl of soup and opened it. “Oh, gross!”
Lex looked at him skeptically. “What?”
“Split pea,” Clark replied, shaking his head in disgusted.
“I forgot how much you hate peas. How can you hate peas, really?”
“They’re little balls of green evil,” Clark said seriously.
“Well, in soup, they’re no longer the same green,” Lex pointed out. He sucked in some noodles. “I think pea soup tastes quite different from regular peas. Have you tried it?
“They’re even more evil in soup. Haven’t you ever seen The Exorcist?”
“Fine, don’t eat it. Surely there’s something there you like?” Lex suggested in a reasonable tone.
Clark peered into the bag and started to look. Lex held up his spoon. Clark sighed. “What, it’s okay for me to be fed, but not you?”
“Exactly. Try it,” Lex ordered.
Clark took a mouthful and shrugged. “It’s good. But my mom’s is better.”
“Everything your mom makes is better. It’s a pity she doesn’t cook as much anymore.”
Clark sighed heavily. “I know. I guess I’m just selfish. I want her to be there when I get home from classes.”
“How are they going?” Lex asked, spooning up another bite for himself.
“Not bad. I’ve met some really weird people.”
“That’s college for you.”
“I’ll tell you all about it later. You’ll be so bored; I’ll be telling you so much stuff,” Clark promised.
Lex leaned back wearily and closed his eyes. “I won’t be bored.”
“You need to sleep.” Clark raised his hand and let his fingers brush over Lex’s soft scalp. “And you need to eat more than that.”
“I know,” Lex murmured. Clark tried to take the soup out of his hands so that he could make another attempt at feeding Lex, but Lex scowled and pulled it back. “You don’t have to feed me.”
“I just want to make sure that you get what you need, Lex,” Clark protested.
Lex sighed and looked over at Clark. “You’ll make a great father, Clark. But I’m not a child.”
No, you’re just having one! “Thanks.”
Clark handed Lex a bottle of apple juice. His eyes followed Lex’s movements carefully, fretfully, watching Lex try to finish eating and drinking while distracted and still looking over at Lena. Maybe Chloe was right. Maybe it shouldn’t matter, and Clark should be the same kind of friend to Lex whether he was pregnant or not, but it felt different.
It suddenly dawned on Clark that Lena must have known about Lex’s condition. She’d known, and she’d come to see him with the express purpose of getting them back on track with each other.
“I know you don’t believe it, Lex, but I think you’d be a good father, too.” Clark could have cried at the expression on Lex’s face. It wasn’t fair for Lex to have more worries when he already had so much on him. “Don’t look like that. You’ve looked after all of us: me, Lana, and Chloe. You’re a lot better at that ‘care’ thing than your father.”
“Thank you, Clark,” Lex replied gravely.
They sat in silence, and Clark ate one of the sandwiches and the baked potato soup. Chloe could suffer through the split pea. When she returned, Clark threw the trash away and then took Lex into his arms.
“Hey!” Lex complained. Chloe smiled at them and took a seat herself to observe them
Clark waited for the orderly to set the cot up. “Put it by the other bed. Quiet, Lex. You need to sleep, and you can do that better lying down than perched in a chair.” He laid Lex gently onto the cot and leaned over him. “You can hold her hand from here, but try to get some sleep, hm? You know Lena’s gonna be mad at me when she wakes up if I don’t take care of you.”
“Heh. Lena is really one of the best I’ve seen at motivating by fear. You wouldn’t think it, to look at her.” Lex reached over and touched his sister’s hand again, allowing Clark to pull a blanket up over him.
“She put the fear of God into me,” Clark said honestly. He rubbed Lex’s back again and watched as Lex rolled over onto his side, looking at Lena dejectedly. “She’s going to wake up, Lex. Don’t doubt it for a second. Of course, she’s gonna wake up. She’s a Luthor. And that means she’s a survivor.”
Clark heard a soft noise from Lex, and then there was silence for several moments before he heard Lex’s voice whisper, “Luthors die, Clark. My mother, my brother, my grandparents… my nephew.”
His voice broke on the final word, and to Clark’s surprise, when he looked on Lex’s face, he could see tears coming down his cheeks. Clark didn’t know what to say; he just figured he knew why Lex was having a hard time holding his emotions back these days, so he just massaged Lex back and let him cry, and hold Lena’s hand, until it looked like his eyelids were drooping.
“Good. He needed to sleep,” Clark said to himself.
“Are you going to?” Chloe asked.
Clark jumped. He’d forgotten that she was here. “I… no. I’m just going to watch him. You can get some sleep, though.”
Chloe shook her head. “I’m in this for the long haul. I have to notify Mercy if anything happens.”
“I could do that for you.”
“You’re not on the payroll. I can make some calls while you’re watching him? I just called little Rujuko to check his vitals.” Chloe paused. “It’s after midnight, Clark.”
Clark nodded and sat on the edge of Lex’s cot. It seemed like hours had passed when a very old woman came into the room. Her white, curly hair was bound on the back of her head, although wisps had escaped here and there around her face. She met Clark’s eye and pressed a finger to her lips with a soft, sad smile.
“Are you here to see Lena?” Chloe asked in a whisper as she stood to greet the old woman, who nodded slowly and made her way over to the other side of the bed.
Her gnarled fingers brushed against Lena’s cheek. “Oh, little girl,” the woman said. “Nana’s here to see you off.” She brought her other hand up to cross over her chest and began to whisper a gentle prayer as she stood over her.
Clark stuck out his lower lip and looked to Chloe, who came up to hug him from behind. She rested her chin on his shoulder and watched the old woman continue her little ritual. He felt the wetness of Chloe’s tears against his neck, and he hugged her arms. She had so much empathy. Clark thought, not for the first time since Lana and his father had ‘died,’ how morbid people were, to have all of this ceremony and mystery around death, and he wondered if Kryptonians had any rituals like that to help them accept the unacceptable reality that they would never see their loved ones again. Jor-El had never seemed to think that death was a matter of much concern, and his father’s attitude toward the value of life had shaken him. Chloe’s potential death had seemed to mean nothing to Jor-El, nor did the life of the people of Smallville, his parents, or the rest of the world. Clark wondered if that were a Kryptonian trait, or just one from his sadistic and malfunctioning AI.
The little rituals and symbols hadn’t seemed to help Clark, even though he’d grown up with them. Likely the reason he’d used an irreplaceable time-travel device to bring Lana back after she had died. After his father had died for the first time, Clark had begged Jor-El to do something. Was there something wrong with him, that he just couldn’t seem to let go?
He wondered, if Lex didn’t make it through carrying this child, how he would react. Clark doubted he would react well.
***
Lex smiles as Clark carries him up to the loft, gently, and sets him down on the red couch. So many naughty dreams Lex has had about this couch, and here he is. With Clark. Being touched by Clark. Being loved by Clark.
It’s just too good.
Their mouths meet hungrily, and Clark just can’t keep his hands to himself. Lex opens his mouth wider and lets Clark suck on his tongue. Clark has always had a beautiful mouth. Clark can do beautiful things with his mouth. Clark’s hands go over Lex’s back slowly then cup his ass with a squeeze.
“Clark… I…”
“So sexy…” Clark murmurs breathlessly. His hands move over Lex’s chest, then slightly lower, and they touch his hard, rounded abdomen, feeling it unhurriedly, almost excitedly, as he kisses Lex even more fiercely. His hands stop, cupping the curve of Lex’s belly, and Lex looks at Clark in they eye. He couldn’t love this crazy alien more.
Then Clark smiles. Not a happy smile. A malicious smile. A smile that morphs Clark’s beautiful face into a sharp, ridge mask. His cheekbones begin to pop out, and Lex can suddenly feel horrible pain in his side. He looks down to find that Clark’s hand has changed into a shard of metal, and he is stabbing the baby!
“Clark, no. No! Please, oh, God. Not you!”
Clark’s expression sours. “I hardly need your compliance for what I want,” he says in a bored tone.
Lex grabs Clark’s wrist and pulls at it frantically. He can’t let it end like this. Not another dead baby!
Looking up, to Lex’s bewilderment, they are in Lena’s club. It’s deserted. He meets Clark’s eye again and… it is Milton Fine.
“What do you want with me?” Lex demands. “What do you want with us?!”
Fine pulls the metal out of him and looks at him coldly. “You’re the only one, Lex. Surely you’ve known that.”
Lex gazes up blindly from the cold floor. “The one…”
“I need her. She’s really only yours on loan,” Fine replies. He reaches down and rips the baby out of Lex’s stomach, letting out a long rattling laugh.
Lex woke frightened and disoriented. He jerked into a sitting position and felt something pull at his arm as he tried to get up and flee. Clark’s large hands grabbed his shoulders and held him down, and that only made him panic more.
“Lex, it’s me! Calm down!” Clark pleaded. “Just a dream, okay?
“What… what are you doing? Please don’t take her!”
“You’ll pull the IV out, Lex. Just- okay, I’m backing off.” Clark held his hands up and stepped away.
Lex took a shaky breath and looked around him. First he spotted Chloe, who was leaning on the doorframe and looking wary, then little Rujuko, who had her hands up as though she wanted to fix the IV bag, now hanging precariously from the stand. Then he saw Lena.
“Oh,” he whispered.
“Just... let me take care of this. You’re drained and a little dehydrated,” Rujuko said, moving closer.
“I…” Lex curled a hand over his stomach and looked at Lena once again. “I think I know who hurt her…”
Clark and Chloe exchanged a look. Clark moved forward again hesitantly. “Lex, you had a bad dream. I’m not going to hurt you; you know that right?”
“I need to see your eyes, Clark.” Lex narrowed his eyes and scanned Clark nervously.
Clark frowned but approached the cot, lowered himself, and looked directly in Lex’s eyes. Lex touched Clark’s face tentatively and scrutinized his eyes for several long minutes.
Finally, Lex took another shaky breath and said in an uncertain voice, “Clark…” Then he lay back on the cot and covered his eyes with his hand. “I’m sorry. I thought… I’m such a mess right now. I’m normally better about things like this.”
“You’re entitled,” Clark declared, coming to his side and taking his other hand. “What did you think?”
“I thought you were Milton Fine,” Lex admitted. Clark looked at him gravely and touched his cheek. Lex looked back at him. “Bad dream.”
“So I guessed. It’s alright.”
“Clark, I think Milton Fine is the one who attacked Lena.”
Clark rubbed Lex’s shoulder. “Tell me about your dream.”
“I… we were in your loft, and…” Lex paused, blinking with wavering eyes. He moved his hand away from his stomach nervously. “You had your hands on me. Then you stabbed me. Then I was in Lena’s club, and you were him. I have to compare her wounds to the ones from my security officers. He killed quite a few of them several months ago. I believe the wounds will match.”
Chloe crossed her arms and walked over to them. “Are you feeling okay?”
“Okay?” Lex shook his head. “This maniac is after me and almost killed my sister.”
“Are you still sure this is all about me?” Clark asked with a gentle smile.
Lex moved his head slightly and looked up at him, seeing both the loving husband and the murderous sociopath from his dreams. “I’m not really sure of much anymore.”
“You should try to relax,” Rujuko said, leaning over him and putting a blood pressure cuff on his arm. It was aggravating, but Lex let her work over him. When he felt her fingers on his abdomen, he experienced a moment of panic, but then realized her touch was actually quite different, tenderer, than the touch he’d felt in his dream. Rujuko was much gentler than her mother, not that he would have wanted the girl to be doing his internal exams.
“What do you think, Doc?” he asked her.
“I think you need to stop stressing out,” she said flatly. “And you should probably rest here, if you don’t plan to return home.”
Lex shook his head. “No. But…” He pushed himself up. “I am going to the restroom.”
Clark moved to his side quickly to help him off the cot. Lex made a small noise of protest, but let Clark’s hand rest on his back as he leaned on the IV stand and made his way to the suite’s bathroom.
***
So much love. Love, love, and quite a bit of prickly, heart pounding fear. Fear to the point of nausea, but even though there was fear, it was because of the love.
Loss. Abject grief. And fear.
Somewhere near there were pangs of cringing guilt.
Lena opened her eyes, and was only momentarily disoriented before she noticed what was missing, first with her heart and then with her hand, which she slipped under her hospital gown.
Her baby was gone. Gone. No little nascent feelings. No flutters or kicks or rolls. Never again. Gone. Her boy.
Everything she was feeling suddenly drowned under the weight of her panic as fat tears rolled down her face and her throat seemed to close up.
“Oh my God,” she cried in a hoarse voice, more than a little in prayer, to make this not true. This couldn’t be. Her little baby didn’t deserve this. He’d done nothing, and that man, that thing had just, just… murdered him.
Before she could recuperate, a rush of emotions not her own came at her, and she felt for the first time since she’d left her girlhood that she might explode with them and go insane.
Love, sadness, fear, protectiveness, pity, guilt, anger, jealousy, and on and on. She couldn’t keep up.
Then… happiness. Happiness did not belong here.
Lex was climbing into the bed with her to put his arms around her.
“How can you be happy?!” she demanded in a voice so low and scary that she didn’t recognize it as her own.
Lex’s lips trembled, and he shook his head. “Because you’re alive.”
Lena bit her lip and shook. His hands came up against her cheeks, cupping them lovingly, as though she weren’t a grown woman, but his little girl, and he began kissing her cheeks, and holding her, and making soothing noises, but he never said it was “going to be alright.”
And she knew that he knew, that it was not all right.
When the doctors came in Lena whimpered, her head pounding. They checked over her, briskly and clinically, and made a comment that she was a lucky woman, but she felt no luck. Luck was not a feeling she’d ever learned to identify.
“Can you please leave us alone?” Lex asked. Well, asked was a bit of an over exaggeration. A little bubble of laughter slipped out of her, at the undertone of the order. They might find themselves dead in the street, if they didn’t get out of there.
“We’ll be right outside,” Clark said, and Lena noticed for the first time that he was there. There, and there for Lex. Good. Finally. The big too-handsome idiot.
When they’d all cleared the room, Lex turned to her and began petting her hair.
“He’s gone,” Lena moaned unnecessarily. What else could she say? Her hand moved from the area of loss over to Lex’s still distended abdomen and slipped under his shirt to feel. She closed her eyes, more tears slipping out and then dropped her head into the curve of his shoulder. “Too much. Too much to feel, Lex. Oh God… why are you still so scared? Stop feeling guilty, please,” she begged.
“I-I’ll try, Lena,” he whispered in return. “I’m afraid because you were attacked, and I don’t know if your attacker will come after you again. He might. I don’t know. He’s already taken so much from you.”
“I wish…” Lena bit back the words, because Lex couldn’t hear her wishing he’d killed her too. Maybe he sensed it, because he held her more tightly, and she felt wet tears falling on her cheek. He rocked her, gently, and she was so grateful to have him in the midst of this chaos.
They curled together for a long time, it seemed, clinging to one another like frightened children. Lex kissed her cheek again.
“I should have a scar. Why don’t I have a scar?” Lena whispered absently. She didn’t care why, really, but it seemed wrong for there to be no trace of her baby ever having been there. There was tension in Lex’s chest, and she whispered his name, hoping he would talk to her. His voice helped ground her more than anything right now. God, she hoped they didn’t send a shrink in to see her. Shrinks were the worst.
“You very nearly left us, Lena.”
“I should have a scar,” she insisted stubbornly.
“I’m sorry, but the treatment…” Lex’s warm hand rubbed her back. Lena could have smiled. He had likely picked up that particular technique from her. It wasn’t as though he had anyone else in his life taking care of him, the poor lamb. He continued, after bolstering some courage, “They gave you some of my blood, Lena. It healed you, almost completely, though it took some time.”
“Your blood saved me,” she whispered.
“Because of my mutation. There’s more, if you can hear it. I think it’s good news,” he offered tentatively.
Lena pulled back a little, but kept her hand on his stomach. She almost felt afraid that his baby would be taken too, although she knew it was irrational. She didn’t think she could stand to lose them both. “Tell me, Lex.” She wanted distraction from this.
“Our blood types are very similar, Lena. I had us tested. You’re… I’m your brother,” he delivered in a rush of nervousness. Oh, so much nervousness. And hope that this would help in some way. He was busting with things to tell, and holding back because he felt sorry for her, worried for her. He felt like she was fragile.
“My brother,” she repeated. The rest could wait. That was more than enough to digest.
“Um… my father is the connection. I’m sorry about that. I wouldn’t wish him as a parent on anyone, but…” Lex’s eyes lit up as he looked on her face, cupping her cheek again, like she was a precious thing. There it was. The reason for his joy in the midst of this pain. “I am just so happy to have you as my sister, Lena.”
Lena blinked several times, then began crying again, and curled her arms under Lex’s, hugging the backs of his shoulders with her hands. “Oh, baby. You and me!” She gave an unsteady laugh and just let him begin rocking her again. “Lost a baby and gained a brother. Oh, God, thank you for not taking more than you give,” she whispered. “It’s good. It’s good, Lexie.”
“Good you decided we couldn’t get married,” Lex murmured. “Huh, Lenie?”
She let out a peal of laughter. “I told you it was a bad idea!”
“I defer to the wisdom of my older sister,” Lex replied demurely. His arms never faltered, and together they clung, until one and then the other returned to sleep.
Title: Must Be Dreaming
Series/WIP: Sequel to So Much Dreaming
Pairing: Clex!
Rating: PG-13
Summary: After being abducted by aliens and discovering that Jonathan Kent is alive, Lex must come to grips with his shifting relationship with Clark and an unexpected pregnancy.
Spoilers: Through S5, after Cyborg.
Warnings: MPREG!!
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter 5.1
Chapter 5.2
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Part Ten
The lights were too bright, and the air was too cold. Lex paced back and forth in the waiting room, trying to keep breathing and not to faint. It was the same wild rush of panic he’d felt earlier that year when Clark had been shot. Same racing heart, prickling terror up and down his scalp, and tightness in his chest. Only Clark was Clark. Miracles happened around Clark. Lex had felt him gone, then felt him back again.
Lena wasn’t Clark. Lena was frail and all too mortal, and Lex wasn’t sure that he’d ever be able to talk to her again. He could barely catch his breath.
Suddenly strong hands were on him, guiding him somewhere and making him sit. He looked up to see Mercy watching him, and Chloe was kneeling before him and pressing a warm mug of something into his hands. He drank it without thinking or even tasting it, feeling only his heart beating at a pace that it surely couldn’t keep up.
There were people coming in and out, talking to Maureena, giving her and the children soothing words, holding her. Lex leaned on his knees, feeling like he had to put something between the world and his baby, lest this one be taken from him too. Some time later after the warm liquid was gone, Lex looked up to see a doctor coming up to them. He set the mug aside and stood immediately, although he couldn’t focus on her words for several moments.
“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” Lex asked. His tongue flicked out over his lips.
“Sir, we’ve stopped the bleeding for now, but she’s really not looking good. If you’d like to go in and see her… there might not be a lot of time.”
”I want to see her records,” Lex ordered.
The doctor looked startled. “Sir, you can’t-“
“I want to see them,” he repeated sternly. “Have you let my doctors have a look?”
“Wait, wait!” Mareena argued. Her kids clustered around her. “What are you gonna do?”
Lex gave them both a fierce glare. “I’m not going to accept that she’s dead until she’s dead. If my doctors can help her-“
“You aren’t her family, Mr. Luthor,” the doctor said, gently. “You can’t make decisions for her.”
“No, but I got her power of attorney,” Maureena said, putting a hand on her wide hip. “Let him try. Talk to his doctors. Whatever you gotta do to save her!”
Then one of her children burst into tears again, and Lex was suddenly reminded of Maddie. He wondered if she would have wanted to be here.
They were led through the halls of the hospital, and he spotted one of his employees standing outside of Lena’s hospital room with a few other doctors. He nodded to Maureena as she walked into the room and then joined the doctor.
“Talk to me, Dr. Ngugi,” Lex ordered.
The man held up some lab reports, booming in his deep voice, “Sir, I’ve noticed an irregularity in her blood work. I’ve never seen-“
“That’s familiar. That… how is that possible?” Lex grabbed the papers and began looking them over.
“I do not know, Mr. Luthor, but I’ve sent for our reserves in the lab. They should be here in ten minutes, if she can hold on.”
“And then,” Lex asked urgently. “Will it work?”
The man shook his head. “We have no way of knowing. Her blood type might be close enough for this treatment to save her instead of killing her.”
“She’s dying anyway,” Lex argued. Dr. Ngugi gave a deep nod in agreement. Lex took an uneasy breath. His eyes drifted over to the room where Mareena and her children were visiting with Lena. It was so easy for Lex to look at the Slums, his family’s past, as though they held absolutely nothing of value. It was actually more comfortable to think of it that way. His grandmother had been a drunk, and his grandfather had been an abusive drunk and a thief. His father was little more than an inhuman collection of will-to-power urges parading around in a business suit. But the people who had been coming in and out to comfort Mareena had been part of a real community, almost a family. They genuinely went out of their way to take care one another and that in itself was the most alien thing that Lex had ever witnessed.
And that was saying a lot.
As the doctor walked away to make sure that the treatment went through, Lex stepped into the room where Lena was hooked up to many machines and still fighting as they monitored her. He closed his eyes, feeling tears escaping, and he could not care enough to wipe them away. Deeply, he breathed in and out, trying to feel. Trying to feel love and support like he never had before. She’d pick that up from him, and he hoped that it would help her come back. Help her know that she needed to wake up.
Again, strong hands were on him, helping him into a chair, and he opened his eyes to see Mercy again, who seemed unsettled, but her jaw was firm. “Fainted, boss.”
“I didn’t…”
Maureena was rubbing his back, and she gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I know it’s hard, honey. We all love her.”
Lex nodded, but he knew that it was different. They all loved Lena, but her friends and family from the Slums loved each other, too. Outside of Lena, he didn’t have that. Lex leaned on his hand and watched her, waiting. Waiting. Waiting.
Eventually Maureena left, taking her children with her, and she told Lex that she didn’t want them to be there, just in case, so she would be heading back to the hotel to wait with her family.
“Where is Lena’s mother?” Lex asked.
“Outta town, and dad’s in prison, so there probably won’t be anyone else coming in, except some people from the neighborhood to say their goodbyes,” Maureena told him, heading for the door. “Nana Nan will probably come. She was like a mother to Elena.”
Again, something hot was pressed into his hands. He took a sip and set it down. There were concerned whispers behind him. All Lex could do was focus on breathing and trying to make her feel how much he wanted her to open her eyes.
Later when Dr. Ngugi had returned, and he began speaking to them, Lex couldn’t understand him. All he could hear was the pounding of his own head and the beep of the machine monitoring Lena as they administered treatment.
“Please…” he heard himself say. A hand touched his shoulder, and he instinctively shrugged it off.
“-all we can do is watch and wait. Are you sure about the treatment that you gave her?”
“I… no. All I know is that it could save her life. Her blood type is quite rare, you know.”
“I’ve never seen anything like it, Mr. Luthor,” the doctor agreed, and then he paused. “Well. I’ve seen it in one other case…”
“I’m aware,” Lex acknowledged sharply.
They were silent for a moment, and Lex placed his hand on his chest, trying to breathe. Once they’d finished, he stood and moved his chair closer to the bed. He stared at the blood in the IV drip, and then he took her hand, and loved her with all the strength he had in him.
***
“There are things about Lena that you don’t know,” Martha said empathically. She kept her voice low so that Maddie would not overhear them and get upset. She and Clark had gone into the kitchen on the mission of making some banana nut pancakes, while Jonathan had taken Maddie under his wing and put on some movies. All they could do was hope to distract her and keep her calm until they received a call.
However, Clark and his mother still couldn’t be in a room together without arguing.
Clark sighed. “Mom, how would you know anything about Lena?”
“I work with high up people now, Clark, and you hear things,” she said vaguely, shucking off her suit jacket and walking over to get a bowl. “It’s not that I have anything against her really, I just think that Lex needed to have a bit of forethought before he decided to bring a child into his home.”
“Yeah, because you and dad had so much forethought that you gave me your maiden name,” Clark retorted, rolling his eyes.
“Oh, hush, Clark. I’d thought of that before we ever laid eyes on you.” Martha pulled some buttermilk and eggs out of the refrigerator and then set them on the counter.
Clark reached into the refrigerator and grabbed a block of cheese, breaking off a piece and staring at it a moment before putting it in his mouth. “So what ‘things’ about Lena don’t I know? She’s a busybody for sure, but I don’t think she means anyone harm. In fact, I’d guess she got up in my face the other day because she wants to help us, not for any other reason. And Maddie seems to feel safe around her. She won’t say a word around Lois, Lana, or even you.”
Martha sighed and began cracking the eggs and dropping them into the bowl. “Honey… Look. I don’t want to be so negative, but word in the upper circles is that she’s a… prostitute.”
Clark was glad that he didn’t need to breathe as much as humans, because he choked on the piece of cheese he was eating and had to spend several minutes trying to get it back out of his throat before he could reply. “Are you fucking kidding me, Mom??”
“Clark!” Martha turned around. “Language!”
“Maybe you should check your language! Where did you hear that?”
“I told you. Around work. I suppose it’s a credit to her that she’s… serviced such rich clients, but I just can’t condone having a woman like that around a child!”
Clark wiped his mouth and said flatly, “She’s not a prostitute.”
“Clark-“
“You heard wrong, Mom.” Clark stood and tossed his napkin in the trash. “And I’d’ve expected more of you than to just listen to gossip like that.”
“I didn’t realize that you knew her so well.” Martha turned back to the bowl and began to stir as she shook her head. “You know that Lex has a tendency to run with a…less than respectable crowd. Is this such a stretch of the imagination?”
Clark paused for several moments. “Lex is a scarily good judge of character. If Lena’s a prostitute, then she’s a hooker with a heart of gold. Knowing Lex, she probably has some kind of gift or talent that makes her special.”
He walked over to put the skillet on the stove before continuing. “Maybe she’s just a really good person, or she makes Lex laugh, but Lex would never associate with someone who didn’t have any value, and I don’t mean just ‘less than respectable’ poor people and sluts. I mean useless upper class idiots, too. You think Lex doesn’t have any friends just because he’s bald or weird? He’s a billionaire. People are going to flock to him no matter how messed up he is. He just isn’t going to spend any time with them if he doesn’t think they have anything to contribute to the world.”
“I’m aware of that. He was obviously attracted to you because he did believe you had something. Are you forgetting the room that Lex kept on you?” Martha started to cut in some slices of banana.
“That’s not really fair.”
“I think it’s relevant, at least. Maddie has a special ability, and he snatched her up like a piece for his collection. Don’t you find that alarming?” she asked, tilting her head slightly.
Clark crossed his arms. “No. You didn’t hear Lex when he was talking to Maddie. They really do have a connection, and powers or not, I think he just wants to protect her from having to be both a freak and alone like he had to be growing up. When did this start being about you not liking Lex?”
“I like Lex. I just don’t know if I trust him. He’s… you know that he’s changed since he got the company. You know that, Clark.”
“Yeah. And I’ve changed too. And so have you. And dad. Because that’s what people do. But I don’t think that he’s changed into some kind of monster, like you apparently think!”
Martha gave him a stern look.
“Mom, you’re wrong. And even more, it’s not your place to judge him. You’re not his mother, and you’re not Maddie’s mother. You need to butt out.” Clark stood up straight and sighed. “I have to go see them. Are you guys gonna be okay to look after Maddie without me?
“I think that mutant butler that came with her should be able to help, if nothing else. Are you and Lex talking again?” she asked, dropping some butter into the skillet.
“Well, not really. But I can’t let Lex go through this alone. Whoever Lena is, she’s really important to Lex, and I don’t think he does that well when people he loves get hurt.” Clark stepped toward the door. “I don’t know if he’ll want me there, but I’m gonna be there for him if he needs me.”
Martha sighed and shook her head as she poured the batter into the skillet.
Clark walked out into the living room where Maddie had fallen asleep in Jonathan’s arms. The movie was still playing, but Jonathan was paying more attention to the sleeping child. Clark smiled warmly, remembering the few times he was allowed to stay up late when he was a kid.
“Hey,” he said softly, walking towards them.
Jonathan lifted his head. “How’d that go?”
“Mom has lost her mind.” Clark sat by them and petted Maddie’s brow gently. “She thinks Lena is a hooker.”
Jonathan creased his brow. “What?”
“That’s what she said. I can’t believe it.” Clark sighed.
“I’ll try to talk to her again.”
“See, Dad, I don’t think it’s just Lena. I think that Mom still doesn’t trust Lex, so she’s willing not to believe in him. But if you guys aren’t gonna take in Maddie-and believe me, I get why you don’t take in all the stray mutant kids-you can’t really say that much when someone else does. And Lex isn’t that bad at taking care of kids.”
“You’ve seen him with kids?”
“No, well. Ryan. He was pretty good with Ryan even when Ryan was being rude to Lex. But with me. Lex never let any of his Metropolis friends around me much, and I remember the girls he used to date, but I never got to know them because he wouldn’t let them talk to me for long. I barely got to set eyes on Helen.”
Jonathan rubbed his mouth. “True. When you got on Red K for the first time, he came straight to us, to make sure you were taken care of. I think he fancies the idea of being a big brother. There’s something protective in his nature. I always figured that was why he and Lana had a relationship at all. ‘Cause she let him do for her.”
Clark nodded with a slight frown. Maddie was stirring a little at their voices, and Clark waited until she was looking up at him to speak. “Hey, Maddie. Getting tired?”
“Have you heard anything about Lena?” she asked. Her eyes were still puffy from crying.
Clark’s heart hurt for her. The girl had lost too much already. “No, I haven’t. But I’m gonna go to the hospital to check up on her and Lex.”
“Oh my God, Clark, Lex was so sad,” she said in a small voice, then she swallowed tensely.
“Mom’s making you some banana pancakes for a late dinner, and I’ll be back as soon as I can. But I want you to stay calm, okay? I’ll try to help Lex be less sad.”
“Good, because he needs you. “ Maddie yawned widely and looked around. “Where’s Domovoi?”
Clark lifted his head and scanned the walls. “He’s outside. It looks like he’s… securing the perimeter or something. I thought he was a butler. Is he part of Lex’s security?”
“He’s something. Lex said he was trained up north by some guy named Alfred. I dunno,” Maddie shrugged. “You should go be with Lex now.”
Clark smiled and nodded. Impulsively, he leaned over and gave her a kiss on the forehead. “I’ll call as soon as I know anything.”
Maddie nodded and snuggled into Jonathan’s arms. The older man hugged her tightly and looked to his son. “Clark, remember your cell phone. We want to be able to call you just in case.”
“I’ve got it.” Clark pulled it out of his pocket. He sighed deeply. “Okay. Going now. See you later Dad. Hang in there Maddie.” He leaned over to give her a hug before he headed outside. Once there, he sped off to Metropolis.
The trip only took a few seconds. At least to get there. Getting into the hospital was another matter, and getting to see Lena. The nurse at the front desk blocked him. So he waited there for a moment before zipping around the desk and looking through her book. She looked up and blinked, wondering if the guy had actually moved or not. Clark smiled charmingly down at her, then stepped away from the desk and scanned around for Chloe, who should be out here, last he’d heard.
No Chloe. Hm. Clark sharpened his eyes and ears and tried to find Lex. Focusing in a way that he hadn’t bothered to do in a long time, he listened for Lex’s heartbeat as he looked through the walls to find the room number where Lena was supposed to be. Oh! There it was. The lively whooshing of Lex’s heartbeat. And then another one, faster and more fluttering.
He turned his head in that direction and saw the skeletons walking by. There was one tall one outside the room, and inside, two skeletons on the bed… three. There was a little skeleton inside the body on the right. Clark felt his eyes prick with tears.
“Oh, Lena’s baby is alive!” he whispered to himself, so grateful that the news had been wrong. He didn’t know her well, but he wouldn’t wish that kind of pain on anyone. And Lex might not ever get over her miscarrying his baby. He looked at the small bones of the fetus and sighed. So fragile. Clark walked out of sight, then in the blink of an eye, he was deep inside the hospital. He walked up to the person who had been standing outside the room, who unsurprisingly turned out to be Mercy.
“Clark,” she said seriously. Her eyes were lined and worried. She had likely been watching out for Lex the whole night.
“I want to go in,” he told her. “Is it okay?”
“Like they’re gonna stop us,” she replied. “We got permission from the woman who holds her power of attorney.”
“Where’s Chloe?”
“Getting some dinner for Lex. He’s too upset about this to think about eating,” Mercy explained. “Don’t go in there and aggravate him, Clark. He has enough on him right now.”
“I didn’t come for that, Mercy. I came just in case he needed someone to lean on. Okay?”
She nodded briskly and stepped away from the door so that he could enter. Clark smiled a little. It was good to see Lex’s employees actually taking care of him. Clark stepped through the door and raked his eyes over the bed. He blinked.
Lena was on the left. Lex was on the right. He narrowed his eyes and looked at them again with the x-ray. Again, the little fetus. On the right. Inside Lex. Inside. Lex.
Omigod!! Clark felt a panic breaking out all over his body. How had he not known?!
“Oh, Lex…” The words escaped from his mouth, and Lex looked up from the bed. He rolled over and slipped off the bed, rubbing his eyes for a moment and steadying himself. Clark couldn’t drag his eyes away from that little bulge under Lex’s shirt, which Lex had obviously been too preoccupied to retuck properly. Clark looked again and stared in amazement at the tiny baby moving inside Lex. Real. Alive.
This explained so much.
When Lex approached him, Clark wrapped his arms around Lex’s shoulders and hugged him tightly. Lex stiffened, as Clark expected him to, but very quickly, Lex’s arms came up around him.
“Sorry,” Clark whispered. All the bits and pieces were crashing in on Clark now. That tiny sound that had been inside Lex, his illness, Chloe’s research, the abduction. “I’m so sorry, Lex. I’m so sorry.”
“She…”
“Lena lost her baby?”
Lex’s head nodded, then curled into Clark’s shoulder. Clark rubbed his back soothingly, and Lex looked up a bit groggily. His eyes were red-rimmed and had nine-foot shadows underneath. He looked so, so weary. “I spend too much time in hospitals,” he said in a gravelly voice.
“Heh. You really do.”
Lex pulled back, and Clark let his arms drop. Lex rubbed his eyes again and cast a distressed look over to Lena in the bed. Clark couldn’t begin to imagine how Lex felt about her losing her baby. How he was feeling about himself and his baby.
“I’m sorry,“ Clark said again.
Lex looked back at him, his expression open, mostly from fatigue. “Clark, I… I overreacted.”
“No, you didn’t. You’ve warned me a couple of times, and I keep saying that I can do this… but I can’t.” Clark winced at the harsh look Lex gave to him. “I just keep hurting you, Lex, and everything I do is wrong. I try to be someone who you can trust, but I can’t trust people, and I thought I was doing okay, you know? I wanted to stay away and give you some air because the fighting is just too much, but that was wrong, too.”
“And what am I supposed to do with that?” Lex asked softly. “Pretend it doesn’t hurt when you assume I’m a monster?”
“No. I don’t know.” Clark stepped closer to him and put his hands on Lex’s shoulders. “It’s me that needs the work. I know you aren’t a monster, but… I’m so sorry.”
Lex sighed and took Clark’s hand. “Thank you for being here.”
Clark put his hand over Lex’s and pressed his lips together.
“She’s… She’s improving. I don’t know if she’ll live. We gave her-” Lex shook his head and looked back at her again. “Clark…”
Clark could only smile. His Lex. So intense when he was in love. “I know she means a lot to you.”
“She does,” Lex admitted. “I’d like for you to get to know her, Clark, if she wakes up. I don’t know what your mom has against her-“
“My mom should butt out of it,” Clark said sharply. No way he was going to repeat what his mother had said while Lex was looking like he might break down. Lex’s lips spread slightly, and Clark looked at him hopefully. “Are we trying again?”
“I really need for there to be some kind of stability in our relationship. I don’t mean to keep riding you, but I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t need it,” Lex said in a soft, but insistent voice.
Clark puffed himself up. “Well, then call me Mr. Reliable.”
“I’ll keep my standards low.”
Clark couldn’t help but laugh. “This is all I can do, Lex. Just know I’m trying, okay?”
“I will, but… I can’t promise a rational reaction to anything right now.”
“Don’t worry about that. Um, Lex,” Clark ventured tentatively. Lex nodded and frowned seriously. Clark looked down again, trying not to obviously stare at Lex’s baby… Gosh, she was so cute! “Lena seems like a nice girl, and I think she really does care about you, so… I’ll try to get along with her as much as I can. I’m sure this one will turn out better than your other girlfriends.”
Lex tilted his head and skewed his brows. His tongue darted out over his lips as he began to twist the corners upward. “Girlfriend?”
“I wish you’d told me sooner, but....” Clark blushed a little. “It’s your business, I guess. I’m glad she makes you happy.”
Lex burst out laughing. He covered his mouth and bent over, holding onto Clark’s shoulder with one hand as he shook.
“What are you laughing about?” Clark asked in a high voice.
“Oh, God, Clark, why didn’t you just ask?” Lex wiped his eyes. “That’s fantastic. Thanks for the laugh. I really needed one with everything that’s been going on.”
“Okay, well, good for you. But I’m officially confused. She’s not your girlfriend?”
The smile didn’t fade. “No, she isn’t.” He wiped his eyes and leaned against the wall, taking a deep breath. “Actually… see, Clark, she alive right now because I gave her some of my blood.”
“You what?” Clark demanded. Lex moved to the side swiftly when Clark jerked forward. He took a breath and tried to calm himself, mentally giving himself a slap for accidentally intimidating his friend. Clark had assaulted Lex twice this year, and now that he was pregnant, that had to be causing him some anxiety for the safety of the baby. God, how worried he must have been when Maddie’s father had attacked him! “Lex, you’re… you’ve been sick. Should you really be giving blood?”
Lex raised a brow a bit defensively. “I had it shipped over from one of my labs.”
“Oh.” Clark turned his head, feeling dumb. He looked up again when he felt Lex’s hand on his arm.
“I appreciate your concern.” Lex took a breath. “Anyway, as I was saying, I gave her some of my blood.”
”Yeah?” Clark frowned. “And?”
“And… well, I thought that no one in the world matched my blood type, Clark. Believe me, I’ve looked.” Lex licked his lips slowly and looked up at Clark. His voice softened, and he sounded so very hopeful. “I think she’s my sister.”
Clark’s mouth opened, and he blinked dumbly for several moments before he found himself escorting Lex to a chair and sitting down beside him, rubbing his neck and shoulders with one hand. Lex wouldn’t be leaving Lena’s side, and he wouldn’t be leaving Lex’s.
***
When Chloe entered the hospital room with a few bags of food, Lex was still staring in abject grief at Lena, and Clark was sitting behind him, holding him tenderly, with a hand resting lightly on the back of his neck. She traded a glance with Mercy as she handed the woman a sandwich.
“I got some soup for Lex, with the sandwiches; I figured that might be easier to force on him if he stays so out of it- when did Clark get here?” she rattled off in a low voice.
“Little while ago. He’s been behaving, and I think it’s helping Lex to have him here.” Mercy shrugged. “I have to head back to LuthorCorp, shower, change, and make sure things go smooth until this is sorted out one way or another. Can you keep an eye on them?”
“Yeah.” Chloe’s eyes fixed on the image of the two men huddled together. “If Lex and Clark are getting along, Clark can probably make sure that Lex calms down a little. I thought my heart would leap out of my chest when he fainted.”
“Blood pressure, probably. Or stress,” Mercy decided.
“Should I call Tanaka? It feels like we should have someone checking his blood pressure, sugars, you know.”
Mercy thinned her lips. “We can get someone here just as easily. I’ll call Rujuko. The girl should be in Metropolis about now for her classes. She’s closer, and frankly, gentler.”
“Good idea.” Chloe reached over and patted Mercy’s arm gently. “You go. I’ll make sure they don’t erupt in an unsightly display of domestic violence.”
Mercy reached behind Chloe’s head and pulled the girl close to her, giving her a kiss on the forehead. Chloe closed her eyes and sighed, and then Mercy told her softly, “Stay amazing, Chlo.”
Chloe crossed her arms and watched the tall woman depart before she headed into the room and walked up to Clark. She touched his shoulder gently. Clark jerked, and he turned to look at her, although Lex didn’t seem to have noticed her arrival. She wasn’t surprised.
“Chloe!” Clark whispered. He met her eye with a bit of a frown, looked back to Lex, then told him he’d be just a moment. Lex made a noise of acknowledgement, but didn’t turn his head. He was clutching Lena’s limp hand.
Chloe and Clark stepped out of the room and Chloe held up her bag. “I brought some food. I know he’s kind of upset, but it’s already been too long since he’s eaten.”
“You should have told me, Chloe,” Clark said in a firm, deep voice.
Chloe blinked. “Just did. Food time.”
“Not about that. About…” Clark turned his head to look at Lex then made a motion with his hands as though he were rubbing and invisible basketball over his stomach.
“Clark, you have many abilities, but the zen of the mime, you do not. What the hell is that supposed to be?” Chloe asked, narrowing her eyes in confusion.
Clark rolled his eyes and leaned over. “I know about his little stowaway.”
“His… what? Clark, what are you- oh. Right. Well…” She licked her lips and looked away. “We’ve been over this. Privacy. Gotta have it? Now move so I can get babydaddy some food!”
“He gets hurt so much.” Clark scrunched up his face. “You should have told me, so I could protect him. This would have changed everything!”
“Why should it?” Chloe asked. “We both know that Milton Fine did this. He- oh, Clark.”
Clark turned back to Lex, where she was pointing, to see him slumping over. He blurred over to Lex’s side, to Chloe’s shock, and pushed him up.
“Clark, what are you doing?” Lex asked, looking up at him with shining eyes. He’d just been bowing his head over her.
Clark’s brows tented, and he leaned in to hug him. “Sorry. I was… sorry.”
“You don’t have to keep apologizing,” Lex told him. He bowed his head again and wiped his eyes.
“Lex, I brought something to eat,” Chloe said gently. She set the bag down on Clark’s chair and pulled out a Styrofoam bowl. “You up for this?”
“He’ll eat it,” Clark said in an authoritative tone. He moved the bag and sat next to Lex again, taking the bowl from Chloe and opening it up. “Chicken noodle? Mmmm. With veggies! Rice, potatoes, carrots…” Clark dipped the spoon into the soup and held up to Lex’s mouth.
Lex quirked a brow. “Seriously.”
“Lex, you need to eat something. The b- to keep your strength up. You look exhausted!” Clark dismayed. Chloe rubbed Clark’s shoulders. “Chloe, could you get them to bring a cot in here?”
“A cot?” Lex reached over and took the bowl from Clark with a frown. “I can feed myself. Give me the spoon.”
Clark smiled a little. “You need some real sleep, too.”
Lex took a large spoonful and began to eat the soup with a worried frown as he continued watching Lena.
“I’ll go ask for a cot. There’s juice in there, Lex,” Chloe informed him. “You eat something too, Clark.”
Clark nodded and reached into the bag. He picked up another bowl of soup and opened it. “Oh, gross!”
Lex looked at him skeptically. “What?”
“Split pea,” Clark replied, shaking his head in disgusted.
“I forgot how much you hate peas. How can you hate peas, really?”
“They’re little balls of green evil,” Clark said seriously.
“Well, in soup, they’re no longer the same green,” Lex pointed out. He sucked in some noodles. “I think pea soup tastes quite different from regular peas. Have you tried it?
“They’re even more evil in soup. Haven’t you ever seen The Exorcist?”
“Fine, don’t eat it. Surely there’s something there you like?” Lex suggested in a reasonable tone.
Clark peered into the bag and started to look. Lex held up his spoon. Clark sighed. “What, it’s okay for me to be fed, but not you?”
“Exactly. Try it,” Lex ordered.
Clark took a mouthful and shrugged. “It’s good. But my mom’s is better.”
“Everything your mom makes is better. It’s a pity she doesn’t cook as much anymore.”
Clark sighed heavily. “I know. I guess I’m just selfish. I want her to be there when I get home from classes.”
“How are they going?” Lex asked, spooning up another bite for himself.
“Not bad. I’ve met some really weird people.”
“That’s college for you.”
“I’ll tell you all about it later. You’ll be so bored; I’ll be telling you so much stuff,” Clark promised.
Lex leaned back wearily and closed his eyes. “I won’t be bored.”
“You need to sleep.” Clark raised his hand and let his fingers brush over Lex’s soft scalp. “And you need to eat more than that.”
“I know,” Lex murmured. Clark tried to take the soup out of his hands so that he could make another attempt at feeding Lex, but Lex scowled and pulled it back. “You don’t have to feed me.”
“I just want to make sure that you get what you need, Lex,” Clark protested.
Lex sighed and looked over at Clark. “You’ll make a great father, Clark. But I’m not a child.”
No, you’re just having one! “Thanks.”
Clark handed Lex a bottle of apple juice. His eyes followed Lex’s movements carefully, fretfully, watching Lex try to finish eating and drinking while distracted and still looking over at Lena. Maybe Chloe was right. Maybe it shouldn’t matter, and Clark should be the same kind of friend to Lex whether he was pregnant or not, but it felt different.
It suddenly dawned on Clark that Lena must have known about Lex’s condition. She’d known, and she’d come to see him with the express purpose of getting them back on track with each other.
“I know you don’t believe it, Lex, but I think you’d be a good father, too.” Clark could have cried at the expression on Lex’s face. It wasn’t fair for Lex to have more worries when he already had so much on him. “Don’t look like that. You’ve looked after all of us: me, Lana, and Chloe. You’re a lot better at that ‘care’ thing than your father.”
“Thank you, Clark,” Lex replied gravely.
They sat in silence, and Clark ate one of the sandwiches and the baked potato soup. Chloe could suffer through the split pea. When she returned, Clark threw the trash away and then took Lex into his arms.
“Hey!” Lex complained. Chloe smiled at them and took a seat herself to observe them
Clark waited for the orderly to set the cot up. “Put it by the other bed. Quiet, Lex. You need to sleep, and you can do that better lying down than perched in a chair.” He laid Lex gently onto the cot and leaned over him. “You can hold her hand from here, but try to get some sleep, hm? You know Lena’s gonna be mad at me when she wakes up if I don’t take care of you.”
“Heh. Lena is really one of the best I’ve seen at motivating by fear. You wouldn’t think it, to look at her.” Lex reached over and touched his sister’s hand again, allowing Clark to pull a blanket up over him.
“She put the fear of God into me,” Clark said honestly. He rubbed Lex’s back again and watched as Lex rolled over onto his side, looking at Lena dejectedly. “She’s going to wake up, Lex. Don’t doubt it for a second. Of course, she’s gonna wake up. She’s a Luthor. And that means she’s a survivor.”
Clark heard a soft noise from Lex, and then there was silence for several moments before he heard Lex’s voice whisper, “Luthors die, Clark. My mother, my brother, my grandparents… my nephew.”
His voice broke on the final word, and to Clark’s surprise, when he looked on Lex’s face, he could see tears coming down his cheeks. Clark didn’t know what to say; he just figured he knew why Lex was having a hard time holding his emotions back these days, so he just massaged Lex back and let him cry, and hold Lena’s hand, until it looked like his eyelids were drooping.
“Good. He needed to sleep,” Clark said to himself.
“Are you going to?” Chloe asked.
Clark jumped. He’d forgotten that she was here. “I… no. I’m just going to watch him. You can get some sleep, though.”
Chloe shook her head. “I’m in this for the long haul. I have to notify Mercy if anything happens.”
“I could do that for you.”
“You’re not on the payroll. I can make some calls while you’re watching him? I just called little Rujuko to check his vitals.” Chloe paused. “It’s after midnight, Clark.”
Clark nodded and sat on the edge of Lex’s cot. It seemed like hours had passed when a very old woman came into the room. Her white, curly hair was bound on the back of her head, although wisps had escaped here and there around her face. She met Clark’s eye and pressed a finger to her lips with a soft, sad smile.
“Are you here to see Lena?” Chloe asked in a whisper as she stood to greet the old woman, who nodded slowly and made her way over to the other side of the bed.
Her gnarled fingers brushed against Lena’s cheek. “Oh, little girl,” the woman said. “Nana’s here to see you off.” She brought her other hand up to cross over her chest and began to whisper a gentle prayer as she stood over her.
Clark stuck out his lower lip and looked to Chloe, who came up to hug him from behind. She rested her chin on his shoulder and watched the old woman continue her little ritual. He felt the wetness of Chloe’s tears against his neck, and he hugged her arms. She had so much empathy. Clark thought, not for the first time since Lana and his father had ‘died,’ how morbid people were, to have all of this ceremony and mystery around death, and he wondered if Kryptonians had any rituals like that to help them accept the unacceptable reality that they would never see their loved ones again. Jor-El had never seemed to think that death was a matter of much concern, and his father’s attitude toward the value of life had shaken him. Chloe’s potential death had seemed to mean nothing to Jor-El, nor did the life of the people of Smallville, his parents, or the rest of the world. Clark wondered if that were a Kryptonian trait, or just one from his sadistic and malfunctioning AI.
The little rituals and symbols hadn’t seemed to help Clark, even though he’d grown up with them. Likely the reason he’d used an irreplaceable time-travel device to bring Lana back after she had died. After his father had died for the first time, Clark had begged Jor-El to do something. Was there something wrong with him, that he just couldn’t seem to let go?
He wondered, if Lex didn’t make it through carrying this child, how he would react. Clark doubted he would react well.
***
Lex smiles as Clark carries him up to the loft, gently, and sets him down on the red couch. So many naughty dreams Lex has had about this couch, and here he is. With Clark. Being touched by Clark. Being loved by Clark.
It’s just too good.
Their mouths meet hungrily, and Clark just can’t keep his hands to himself. Lex opens his mouth wider and lets Clark suck on his tongue. Clark has always had a beautiful mouth. Clark can do beautiful things with his mouth. Clark’s hands go over Lex’s back slowly then cup his ass with a squeeze.
“Clark… I…”
“So sexy…” Clark murmurs breathlessly. His hands move over Lex’s chest, then slightly lower, and they touch his hard, rounded abdomen, feeling it unhurriedly, almost excitedly, as he kisses Lex even more fiercely. His hands stop, cupping the curve of Lex’s belly, and Lex looks at Clark in they eye. He couldn’t love this crazy alien more.
Then Clark smiles. Not a happy smile. A malicious smile. A smile that morphs Clark’s beautiful face into a sharp, ridge mask. His cheekbones begin to pop out, and Lex can suddenly feel horrible pain in his side. He looks down to find that Clark’s hand has changed into a shard of metal, and he is stabbing the baby!
“Clark, no. No! Please, oh, God. Not you!”
Clark’s expression sours. “I hardly need your compliance for what I want,” he says in a bored tone.
Lex grabs Clark’s wrist and pulls at it frantically. He can’t let it end like this. Not another dead baby!
Looking up, to Lex’s bewilderment, they are in Lena’s club. It’s deserted. He meets Clark’s eye again and… it is Milton Fine.
“What do you want with me?” Lex demands. “What do you want with us?!”
Fine pulls the metal out of him and looks at him coldly. “You’re the only one, Lex. Surely you’ve known that.”
Lex gazes up blindly from the cold floor. “The one…”
“I need her. She’s really only yours on loan,” Fine replies. He reaches down and rips the baby out of Lex’s stomach, letting out a long rattling laugh.
Lex woke frightened and disoriented. He jerked into a sitting position and felt something pull at his arm as he tried to get up and flee. Clark’s large hands grabbed his shoulders and held him down, and that only made him panic more.
“Lex, it’s me! Calm down!” Clark pleaded. “Just a dream, okay?
“What… what are you doing? Please don’t take her!”
“You’ll pull the IV out, Lex. Just- okay, I’m backing off.” Clark held his hands up and stepped away.
Lex took a shaky breath and looked around him. First he spotted Chloe, who was leaning on the doorframe and looking wary, then little Rujuko, who had her hands up as though she wanted to fix the IV bag, now hanging precariously from the stand. Then he saw Lena.
“Oh,” he whispered.
“Just... let me take care of this. You’re drained and a little dehydrated,” Rujuko said, moving closer.
“I…” Lex curled a hand over his stomach and looked at Lena once again. “I think I know who hurt her…”
Clark and Chloe exchanged a look. Clark moved forward again hesitantly. “Lex, you had a bad dream. I’m not going to hurt you; you know that right?”
“I need to see your eyes, Clark.” Lex narrowed his eyes and scanned Clark nervously.
Clark frowned but approached the cot, lowered himself, and looked directly in Lex’s eyes. Lex touched Clark’s face tentatively and scrutinized his eyes for several long minutes.
Finally, Lex took another shaky breath and said in an uncertain voice, “Clark…” Then he lay back on the cot and covered his eyes with his hand. “I’m sorry. I thought… I’m such a mess right now. I’m normally better about things like this.”
“You’re entitled,” Clark declared, coming to his side and taking his other hand. “What did you think?”
“I thought you were Milton Fine,” Lex admitted. Clark looked at him gravely and touched his cheek. Lex looked back at him. “Bad dream.”
“So I guessed. It’s alright.”
“Clark, I think Milton Fine is the one who attacked Lena.”
Clark rubbed Lex’s shoulder. “Tell me about your dream.”
“I… we were in your loft, and…” Lex paused, blinking with wavering eyes. He moved his hand away from his stomach nervously. “You had your hands on me. Then you stabbed me. Then I was in Lena’s club, and you were him. I have to compare her wounds to the ones from my security officers. He killed quite a few of them several months ago. I believe the wounds will match.”
Chloe crossed her arms and walked over to them. “Are you feeling okay?”
“Okay?” Lex shook his head. “This maniac is after me and almost killed my sister.”
“Are you still sure this is all about me?” Clark asked with a gentle smile.
Lex moved his head slightly and looked up at him, seeing both the loving husband and the murderous sociopath from his dreams. “I’m not really sure of much anymore.”
“You should try to relax,” Rujuko said, leaning over him and putting a blood pressure cuff on his arm. It was aggravating, but Lex let her work over him. When he felt her fingers on his abdomen, he experienced a moment of panic, but then realized her touch was actually quite different, tenderer, than the touch he’d felt in his dream. Rujuko was much gentler than her mother, not that he would have wanted the girl to be doing his internal exams.
“What do you think, Doc?” he asked her.
“I think you need to stop stressing out,” she said flatly. “And you should probably rest here, if you don’t plan to return home.”
Lex shook his head. “No. But…” He pushed himself up. “I am going to the restroom.”
Clark moved to his side quickly to help him off the cot. Lex made a small noise of protest, but let Clark’s hand rest on his back as he leaned on the IV stand and made his way to the suite’s bathroom.
***
So much love. Love, love, and quite a bit of prickly, heart pounding fear. Fear to the point of nausea, but even though there was fear, it was because of the love.
Loss. Abject grief. And fear.
Somewhere near there were pangs of cringing guilt.
Lena opened her eyes, and was only momentarily disoriented before she noticed what was missing, first with her heart and then with her hand, which she slipped under her hospital gown.
Her baby was gone. Gone. No little nascent feelings. No flutters or kicks or rolls. Never again. Gone. Her boy.
Everything she was feeling suddenly drowned under the weight of her panic as fat tears rolled down her face and her throat seemed to close up.
“Oh my God,” she cried in a hoarse voice, more than a little in prayer, to make this not true. This couldn’t be. Her little baby didn’t deserve this. He’d done nothing, and that man, that thing had just, just… murdered him.
Before she could recuperate, a rush of emotions not her own came at her, and she felt for the first time since she’d left her girlhood that she might explode with them and go insane.
Love, sadness, fear, protectiveness, pity, guilt, anger, jealousy, and on and on. She couldn’t keep up.
Then… happiness. Happiness did not belong here.
Lex was climbing into the bed with her to put his arms around her.
“How can you be happy?!” she demanded in a voice so low and scary that she didn’t recognize it as her own.
Lex’s lips trembled, and he shook his head. “Because you’re alive.”
Lena bit her lip and shook. His hands came up against her cheeks, cupping them lovingly, as though she weren’t a grown woman, but his little girl, and he began kissing her cheeks, and holding her, and making soothing noises, but he never said it was “going to be alright.”
And she knew that he knew, that it was not all right.
When the doctors came in Lena whimpered, her head pounding. They checked over her, briskly and clinically, and made a comment that she was a lucky woman, but she felt no luck. Luck was not a feeling she’d ever learned to identify.
“Can you please leave us alone?” Lex asked. Well, asked was a bit of an over exaggeration. A little bubble of laughter slipped out of her, at the undertone of the order. They might find themselves dead in the street, if they didn’t get out of there.
“We’ll be right outside,” Clark said, and Lena noticed for the first time that he was there. There, and there for Lex. Good. Finally. The big too-handsome idiot.
When they’d all cleared the room, Lex turned to her and began petting her hair.
“He’s gone,” Lena moaned unnecessarily. What else could she say? Her hand moved from the area of loss over to Lex’s still distended abdomen and slipped under his shirt to feel. She closed her eyes, more tears slipping out and then dropped her head into the curve of his shoulder. “Too much. Too much to feel, Lex. Oh God… why are you still so scared? Stop feeling guilty, please,” she begged.
“I-I’ll try, Lena,” he whispered in return. “I’m afraid because you were attacked, and I don’t know if your attacker will come after you again. He might. I don’t know. He’s already taken so much from you.”
“I wish…” Lena bit back the words, because Lex couldn’t hear her wishing he’d killed her too. Maybe he sensed it, because he held her more tightly, and she felt wet tears falling on her cheek. He rocked her, gently, and she was so grateful to have him in the midst of this chaos.
They curled together for a long time, it seemed, clinging to one another like frightened children. Lex kissed her cheek again.
“I should have a scar. Why don’t I have a scar?” Lena whispered absently. She didn’t care why, really, but it seemed wrong for there to be no trace of her baby ever having been there. There was tension in Lex’s chest, and she whispered his name, hoping he would talk to her. His voice helped ground her more than anything right now. God, she hoped they didn’t send a shrink in to see her. Shrinks were the worst.
“You very nearly left us, Lena.”
“I should have a scar,” she insisted stubbornly.
“I’m sorry, but the treatment…” Lex’s warm hand rubbed her back. Lena could have smiled. He had likely picked up that particular technique from her. It wasn’t as though he had anyone else in his life taking care of him, the poor lamb. He continued, after bolstering some courage, “They gave you some of my blood, Lena. It healed you, almost completely, though it took some time.”
“Your blood saved me,” she whispered.
“Because of my mutation. There’s more, if you can hear it. I think it’s good news,” he offered tentatively.
Lena pulled back a little, but kept her hand on his stomach. She almost felt afraid that his baby would be taken too, although she knew it was irrational. She didn’t think she could stand to lose them both. “Tell me, Lex.” She wanted distraction from this.
“Our blood types are very similar, Lena. I had us tested. You’re… I’m your brother,” he delivered in a rush of nervousness. Oh, so much nervousness. And hope that this would help in some way. He was busting with things to tell, and holding back because he felt sorry for her, worried for her. He felt like she was fragile.
“My brother,” she repeated. The rest could wait. That was more than enough to digest.
“Um… my father is the connection. I’m sorry about that. I wouldn’t wish him as a parent on anyone, but…” Lex’s eyes lit up as he looked on her face, cupping her cheek again, like she was a precious thing. There it was. The reason for his joy in the midst of this pain. “I am just so happy to have you as my sister, Lena.”
Lena blinked several times, then began crying again, and curled her arms under Lex’s, hugging the backs of his shoulders with her hands. “Oh, baby. You and me!” She gave an unsteady laugh and just let him begin rocking her again. “Lost a baby and gained a brother. Oh, God, thank you for not taking more than you give,” she whispered. “It’s good. It’s good, Lexie.”
“Good you decided we couldn’t get married,” Lex murmured. “Huh, Lenie?”
She let out a peal of laughter. “I told you it was a bad idea!”
“I defer to the wisdom of my older sister,” Lex replied demurely. His arms never faltered, and together they clung, until one and then the other returned to sleep.