Annual Rebirth
In the year 2005, I will sleep more and drink less. I will write more pages to keep and cut away dead weight. I will embrace my best friends and isolate the unworthy ones. I will deposit more into my marriage and stop withdrawing more than I need at a time. I will burn down condemned bridges and proactively place fuses on the ones becoming rickety. I will go to Italy come Hell or high water, or even both. I will put my ducks into rows and not just to snipe them off. I will paint only with a palette knife. I will keep smoking. I'll learn new recipes. I will expand my horizons and pace myself. I will be a better scheduler. I won't overreact as much as I do now. I will clean out my closet and really get rid of things this time. I will forgive two people, to be named at a later time. I will lay down the law for some and loosen my hold on others. I will recognize the difference between my ambitions and my actual potential. I will give Z better memories of me. I will still hold grudges, but I'll make them mean more. I will have a flower named after me. I will reevaluate some of my resentment. I will celebrate more, from the common victories to the bigger accomplishments. I will try really, really hard to let go of That Stuff. I will not yield to despair when that doesn't happen. I will acknowledge when Ben is right. Of course, it will be a silent nod in his general direction hours after he's left the room, but that's still something. I will walk tall towards a professional direction. I will think things through. I will pick my battles and enjoy my finer moments. I will give more kisses and offer better advice. I wish finish more of the things I begin. I will learn to make kanzashi. I will present more worthwhile contributions, at home and abroad in the world. I will drive better. I will not get lost. I will read the instructions, but not necessarily follow them. I will know what I am getting myself into. I will meet more deadlines and be more comfortable in my own skin. I will buy more ribbon. I will take more walks. I will add more form to function and vice versa. I will redefine tactile. I will continue to buy shoes as if the secret to eternal life is housed in just the right pair of haute couture heels. I will be happier for people I know who do interesting things for themselves. I will label my CDs. I will organize my books in a better system. I will be nicer to Ben, within reason. I will make sure 2005 is far better than 2004.