Insanity

[ladylaurel18]

I am driving myself batty. And not the fun kind, with fangs and blood.

I've started writing a fic that needs a bunch of OC characters, because it starts way before the canon storyline stuff. All well and good, right? I've got background stories on them and I know what they look like, and I know what is going to happen. Blah, blah, blah.

The problems

Comments

[mustafear]

Don't get too far into her head, dear. Stay with the 'wtf' and the anger reaction, followed by an almost indistinguishable moment of acceptance that it isn't the kid's fault. Later on is when you get into her head, in the middle of the story:

"Didn't your mother ever give you a hug?"

"My mother.... blah blhab blah"

Cryptic little statements that make the readers put the pieces together slowly, build suspense. Tie it all together in the end and make the reader sit back and say, "Whoa. Didn't see that coming! I can see it now, though."

[mustafear]

"Your new assignment is to take care of this child. Raise it as your own."

*wtf* "That's not funny, sir."

"I'm not joking, [insert rank here]"

"You can't make me do this. You don't just hand someone a baby and send them off to be a big, happy family. It's not in the job description."

"You're right. This isn't an order and it isn't even officially an assignment. When you take the kid, you go dark. For the next fifteen years, at least."

*silence*

"That's a long time, sir."

*stare*

"You picked me because I don't have anyone left, didn't you?"

"That might have factored in somewhat." *silence* "This kid doesn't have anyone anymore, either."

"That's not playing fair. I'm not sure I can raise a kid."

"They only eat, sleep, and poop at this age, [insert name here]. That gives you plenty of time to learn about the hard stuff."

"What if she doesn't like me?"

"You grow on people. Trust me, I know." [smile]

[ladylaurel18]

y'know, the 'go dark' thing didn't even occur to me. That's interesting. I'm gonna go reread what I do have now, and maybe stick it into stripped down mode like you did to see if it helps.

I like you, you make me think.

long-ass comment

[ladylaurel18]

*dances