Lead the Way - Chapter 043 - 30 Minutes
Happy Easter everyone! That is if you celebrate it... if not: enjoy your spare time! :) Life is pretty busy at my end, so I'm going to keep this short.
Lead the Way - 043 - 30 Minutes
7:00 - JJ was at home, pacing between her kitchen and the dinner table.
7:01 - Everything was prepared and ready. JJ couldn’t help, but look at the clock on the microwave.
7:02 - Yesterday JJ had asked Emily over for dinner. There were several things she wanted to discuss before she left for Christmas.
7:03 - The Media Liaison was torn between wanting to see her girlfriend again and being afraid it would be the last time she could call her that.
7:04 - Time certainly wasn’t slowing down to give her a chance to figure things out.
7:05 - Dinner was ready, Henry was asleep, the baby monitor turned on…
7:06 - Still enough time to change, but JJ felt her light blue blouse and the charcoal grey skirt looked good enough.
7:07 - JJ briefly wondered once more if Emily would like the tuna steak but it was already too late to change that.
7:08 - How should she say it? How could she make it sound as casual as possible?
7:09 - All her life JJ had run from commitment. No man had ever been worth the risk for her to seriously consider staying.
7:10 - She had always feared getting hurt, choosing to cause the pain rather than going through it.
7:11 - The blonde remembered that this was the reason she had given Will for breaking up with him in Miami.
7:12 - That if they came out to the team, it was real and people would get hurt.
7:13 - She had anticipated getting hurt once Will was part of her past. What she hadn’t counted on was hurting while being with him.
7:14 - Every time he kissed her after, every time they had made love she had been hurting. It was subtle at first.
7:15 - A queasy feeling that something was wrong. “You should go for him.”
7:16 - Once she had heard the voice in her head while he was kissing her and it never left her again. Emily.
7:17 - Emily had known all along that she dated Will. Emily had known why she had been uncomfortable around Will.
7:18 - Emily had known just what to say to make her fall into his arms. And she had said it.
7:19 - JJ checked on dinner again, thinking it might help her get her mind off things. She was wrong.
7:20 - Why had Emily still flirted with her knowing that she flew across the country to see a man every weekend? Had Emily known about herself back then?
7:21 - If so, why had she pushed JJ into Will’s arms? Was her happiness all she wanted like she had said that night, a week after Henry was born?
7:22 - Didn’t that imply that she had to mean more to Emily than the one night stands she had had before?
7:23 - How could JJ know what they had meant to her? Had anyone ever mattered to Emily?
7:24 - If Emily hadn’t known about herself six months ago in Miami, when did she find out? How long had she known Helena and Donna and Sara? What about all the other women who had greeted her that night in the bar?
7:25 - What if Emily told her she wanted more than just sex? What if she didn’t?
7:26 - JJ didn’t feel the need to run from commitment for the first time in her life. Should Emily offer it, JJ would jump at it.
7:27 - Was this because of Emily? Because she was a woman? Had she always had these feelings without ever noticing them?
7:28 - All she knew was that the way Emily made her feel - with a look, a touch, a whisper - was more intense then ever before.
7:29 - She never wanted to miss these feelings. Whatever answer Emily would give her, JJ now knew that she would accept it and live with it. She had no choice if she wanted to be with her.
Someone knocked at her door. 7:30. Of course, Emily was right on time.
Lead the Way - 043 - 30 Minutes
7:00 - JJ was at home, pacing between her kitchen and the dinner table.
7:01 - Everything was prepared and ready. JJ couldn’t help, but look at the clock on the microwave.
7:02 - Yesterday JJ had asked Emily over for dinner. There were several things she wanted to discuss before she left for Christmas.
7:03 - The Media Liaison was torn between wanting to see her girlfriend again and being afraid it would be the last time she could call her that.
7:04 - Time certainly wasn’t slowing down to give her a chance to figure things out.
7:05 - Dinner was ready, Henry was asleep, the baby monitor turned on…
7:06 - Still enough time to change, but JJ felt her light blue blouse and the charcoal grey skirt looked good enough.
7:07 - JJ briefly wondered once more if Emily would like the tuna steak but it was already too late to change that.
7:08 - How should she say it? How could she make it sound as casual as possible?
7:09 - All her life JJ had run from commitment. No man had ever been worth the risk for her to seriously consider staying.
7:10 - She had always feared getting hurt, choosing to cause the pain rather than going through it.
7:11 - The blonde remembered that this was the reason she had given Will for breaking up with him in Miami.
7:12 - That if they came out to the team, it was real and people would get hurt.
7:13 - She had anticipated getting hurt once Will was part of her past. What she hadn’t counted on was hurting while being with him.
7:14 - Every time he kissed her after, every time they had made love she had been hurting. It was subtle at first.
7:15 - A queasy feeling that something was wrong. “You should go for him.”
7:16 - Once she had heard the voice in her head while he was kissing her and it never left her again. Emily.
7:17 - Emily had known all along that she dated Will. Emily had known why she had been uncomfortable around Will.
7:18 - Emily had known just what to say to make her fall into his arms. And she had said it.
7:19 - JJ checked on dinner again, thinking it might help her get her mind off things. She was wrong.
7:20 - Why had Emily still flirted with her knowing that she flew across the country to see a man every weekend? Had Emily known about herself back then?
7:21 - If so, why had she pushed JJ into Will’s arms? Was her happiness all she wanted like she had said that night, a week after Henry was born?
7:22 - Didn’t that imply that she had to mean more to Emily than the one night stands she had had before?
7:23 - How could JJ know what they had meant to her? Had anyone ever mattered to Emily?
7:24 - If Emily hadn’t known about herself six months ago in Miami, when did she find out? How long had she known Helena and Donna and Sara? What about all the other women who had greeted her that night in the bar?
7:25 - What if Emily told her she wanted more than just sex? What if she didn’t?
7:26 - JJ didn’t feel the need to run from commitment for the first time in her life. Should Emily offer it, JJ would jump at it.
7:27 - Was this because of Emily? Because she was a woman? Had she always had these feelings without ever noticing them?
7:28 - All she knew was that the way Emily made her feel - with a look, a touch, a whisper - was more intense then ever before.
7:29 - She never wanted to miss these feelings. Whatever answer Emily would give her, JJ now knew that she would accept it and live with it. She had no choice if she wanted to be with her.
Someone knocked at her door. 7:30. Of course, Emily was right on time.