Lead the Way - Chapter 073 - Turn Around
Seems LJ made some new buttons and icons. Well as long as it works I don't much care.
Remember how you guys wanted someone to set Emily straight all those months ago? Well I found a candidate for the job. And please do comment. I kind of like this character ;)
Lead the Way - 073 - Turn Around
“God! Could you be any creepier?“
“Did you forget that you gave me a key?”
“You never used it before.”
“I had a very important question to ask.” Sure, she had given her best friend a key to her place years ago. For emergencies or when she wanted to stay in the States. Not for some creepy stalkout.
“You couldn’t do that over the phone?”
“Not really.”
“Can’t it wait till morning?”
“Not really.”
“Fine. What do you want to know?”
“Do you even know her name?”
“Whose name?”
“The woman whose bed you just stumbled out of.”
Emily shook her head.
“Parking lot?”
Emily looked down.
“Geez Emily! The restrooms?”
“What’s it to you?” She looked up, anger in her eyes.
“This has to stop. Right now.”
“Says who?” She was past defensive and she didn’t care. Rocky had no right to grill her on her sex life no matter how far she had flown to do so.
“I will ask you one question and if you convince me, I won’t mention it again. Deal?”
“If it will get you off my back, fine.”
“Are you happy?”
Emily tried very hard to lie. She knew what she wanted to say, what was expected of her. All she could see was how happy she could have been. How happy she used to be before that fateful dinner and her eyes filled with tears.
“That’s what I thought.” The woman got up and pulled her friend into her arms.
She was guided to sit on her living room couch. She had avoided it since JJ had left. She had no strength to argue left in her. Finally, finally, after all these weeks of keeping her emotions bottled up she cried. She sobbed and wept in Rocky’s arms like a child. She felt a hand stroke her hair, she held on to the arms around her and she didn’t care about the tears leaving marks on the clothes.
“Just let it all out, Honey. You don’t have to be strong all the damn time.”
Emily nodded in between sobs and tried to straighten up. She wiped the tears from her cheeks and tried to explain.
“There’s no need to speak for now. I know everything. About JJ. About why you guys broke up.”
“Garcia.” Even through the crying her voice was hard with anger.
“Don’t blame her. She meant well.”
“They always do.”
Rocky had met Emily at the stables and during her years at Yale the two became friends. Best friends. Over the years they had done more than gossip and dance. They had pulled each other out of tight situations, shared secrets, covered and lied for one another. Never needing to ask for help or thank the other one, because both knew they would return the favor in a heart beat.
In time Rocky had come to understand that Emily was not the trusting type and she had come to know a strong but struggling woman. She had heard every embarrassing secret and every uncomfortable truth and despite the young woman’s fears it had made her love her only that much more.
Emily had been the one to introduce her to Skippy, who would later become her wife and business partner. Emily had always proven to be a great ally and an even better friend and it was time to return the favor by telling her that she was full of crap.
“Emily, there is something I have to tell you.” She knew her friend hadn’t been drinking too much to remember this in the morning. When Emily went out for a seduction - as she frequently had done in college - she only had one or two cocktails. Emily hated spending the night.
Agent Prentiss braced herself for what she knew was to come: You need to get past this, JJ was just another woman, plenty more fish in the sea. She didn’t expect her friend to say:
“She’s the one.” Rocky paused. “I know it, you know it and we both need to figure out what to do now.”
“There is nothing left to do.”
“Oh, but there is. I’ve heard you talk about her, I’ve seen your eyes glow when you mentioned her name in Reims and I have never heard that tone in your voice before. I know about Amélie, Helena, Sorina and Sara. And I know what you’re afraid of. For many years now I have been waiting for you to realize how wrong you are. The wait is over.”
“You don’t understand.”
“No one understands better than me.” Emily got up and hid in the kitchen. Rocky had caught her off guard, showing up in the middle of the night and she had let herself go. It was time to regain control and - politely - tell her to shut the fuck up. When she came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses she felt she could handle it.
“Tell me why you really let her go.”
“I didn’t. She broke up with me.”
“Now see, I know that to be a lie. She wanted you to take your relationship seriously and you told her you couldn’t do it. Let’s try this again. Why did you let her go?”
“Damn it, Rocky, drop it.”
“I didn’t fly halfway around the world to just drop it.”
When Emily preferred to watch her fingers loop together in her lap, Rocky said: “Fine. Then I’ll tell you what you’re afraid of.”
The profiler looked out the window to Capitol Hill. If only she had gone into politics like her mother had suggested. She never would have met Jennifer Jareau.
“You’re afraid of letting her in. Afraid that once you allow yourself to love her the way you do, open up to her and share your secrets, she would leave. You are scared that you’re not enough for her. And you are positively petrified of how much that would hurt.”
Emily shook her head. “That’s not entirely true.”
“Oh?”
“I know she’ll leave.”
“How do you know that?”
“They all do.”
Now it was Rocky’s turn to sigh. She knew all too well how stubborn the Ambassador’s daughter could be.
“They all did because none of them were the one. You made some bad choices, you had your heart broken, it happens to all of us.”
“I can’t afford to lose her.”
“Forgive me, but it doesn’t really look like you’ve got her now.”
Emily got up looking around for something to clean up. The maid had done a perfect job, as usual and she found herself lacking of anything to distract her from this unsettling conversation.
“You are so sure she’s the one. You are so sure she won’t leave. You’ve never even met her.”
“Sure I have. I met her through you and that’s all I need.”
“This optimistic, romantic streak of yours if getting really old, Rocky.”
“As is this pessimistic, pseudo-realistic, paralyzing ring of ice you keep around your heart. What did this woman ever do to make you doubt her?”
When she didn’t answer Rocky went on: “Is it because you’re her first? Because she didn’t fall head over heels in love with you? Because she had doubts at the beginning? Because she has a child? Because she slept with this detective?”
“ENOUGH!”
“NO! No Emily, not this time! This is not some tramp you picked up in a bar and can’t remember the next morning. This is too important and I’m not giving up!”
“Why? Do you need to prove something?”
“Yes. I need to prove to you that you deserve to be as happy as I am.”
“Why? For crying out loud, Rocky, why?”
“Because I love you.”
Suddenly the room seemed to be drained of air. Despite their mutual trust and their unbreakable friendship, neither had said it out loud before. Not so much because of the possible misunderstandings or because there was a line they didn’t want to cross together but because Rocky had always known that Emily needed the distance.
Emily wanted nothing more than intimacy but she was afraid of it just as much. Rocky knew her better than she knew herself and had always allowed her to grow at her own rate. Seeing how her lack of insight was about to cost her the love of her life, the time for such luxuries was over.
“You’re the best friend I have on this planet and I want you to be happy. I want to see that look in your eyes I saw last winter and I want you to stop believing that Skippy will leave me or betray me or cheat on me. I want you to believe in love.”
“I… I don’t know that I can.” Emily sat down again. “If I would accept for only a moment that you are right…”
“What would happen then, Emily?”
“…I have blown my best, my only chance at happiness with the woman I love more than anything in this world.”
“You never know until you ask.”
“She will never forgive me.”
“Who says she has to?”
“She will never take me back.”
“You just need to give her a reason to.”
Emily hugged her but before she could ask how long she had planned on staying the phone rang.
Remember how you guys wanted someone to set Emily straight all those months ago? Well I found a candidate for the job. And please do comment. I kind of like this character ;)
Lead the Way - 073 - Turn Around
“God! Could you be any creepier?“
“Did you forget that you gave me a key?”
“You never used it before.”
“I had a very important question to ask.” Sure, she had given her best friend a key to her place years ago. For emergencies or when she wanted to stay in the States. Not for some creepy stalkout.
“You couldn’t do that over the phone?”
“Not really.”
“Can’t it wait till morning?”
“Not really.”
“Fine. What do you want to know?”
“Do you even know her name?”
“Whose name?”
“The woman whose bed you just stumbled out of.”
Emily shook her head.
“Parking lot?”
Emily looked down.
“Geez Emily! The restrooms?”
“What’s it to you?” She looked up, anger in her eyes.
“This has to stop. Right now.”
“Says who?” She was past defensive and she didn’t care. Rocky had no right to grill her on her sex life no matter how far she had flown to do so.
“I will ask you one question and if you convince me, I won’t mention it again. Deal?”
“If it will get you off my back, fine.”
“Are you happy?”
Emily tried very hard to lie. She knew what she wanted to say, what was expected of her. All she could see was how happy she could have been. How happy she used to be before that fateful dinner and her eyes filled with tears.
“That’s what I thought.” The woman got up and pulled her friend into her arms.
She was guided to sit on her living room couch. She had avoided it since JJ had left. She had no strength to argue left in her. Finally, finally, after all these weeks of keeping her emotions bottled up she cried. She sobbed and wept in Rocky’s arms like a child. She felt a hand stroke her hair, she held on to the arms around her and she didn’t care about the tears leaving marks on the clothes.
“Just let it all out, Honey. You don’t have to be strong all the damn time.”
Emily nodded in between sobs and tried to straighten up. She wiped the tears from her cheeks and tried to explain.
“There’s no need to speak for now. I know everything. About JJ. About why you guys broke up.”
“Garcia.” Even through the crying her voice was hard with anger.
“Don’t blame her. She meant well.”
“They always do.”
Rocky had met Emily at the stables and during her years at Yale the two became friends. Best friends. Over the years they had done more than gossip and dance. They had pulled each other out of tight situations, shared secrets, covered and lied for one another. Never needing to ask for help or thank the other one, because both knew they would return the favor in a heart beat.
In time Rocky had come to understand that Emily was not the trusting type and she had come to know a strong but struggling woman. She had heard every embarrassing secret and every uncomfortable truth and despite the young woman’s fears it had made her love her only that much more.
Emily had been the one to introduce her to Skippy, who would later become her wife and business partner. Emily had always proven to be a great ally and an even better friend and it was time to return the favor by telling her that she was full of crap.
“Emily, there is something I have to tell you.” She knew her friend hadn’t been drinking too much to remember this in the morning. When Emily went out for a seduction - as she frequently had done in college - she only had one or two cocktails. Emily hated spending the night.
Agent Prentiss braced herself for what she knew was to come: You need to get past this, JJ was just another woman, plenty more fish in the sea. She didn’t expect her friend to say:
“She’s the one.” Rocky paused. “I know it, you know it and we both need to figure out what to do now.”
“There is nothing left to do.”
“Oh, but there is. I’ve heard you talk about her, I’ve seen your eyes glow when you mentioned her name in Reims and I have never heard that tone in your voice before. I know about Amélie, Helena, Sorina and Sara. And I know what you’re afraid of. For many years now I have been waiting for you to realize how wrong you are. The wait is over.”
“You don’t understand.”
“No one understands better than me.” Emily got up and hid in the kitchen. Rocky had caught her off guard, showing up in the middle of the night and she had let herself go. It was time to regain control and - politely - tell her to shut the fuck up. When she came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses she felt she could handle it.
“Tell me why you really let her go.”
“I didn’t. She broke up with me.”
“Now see, I know that to be a lie. She wanted you to take your relationship seriously and you told her you couldn’t do it. Let’s try this again. Why did you let her go?”
“Damn it, Rocky, drop it.”
“I didn’t fly halfway around the world to just drop it.”
When Emily preferred to watch her fingers loop together in her lap, Rocky said: “Fine. Then I’ll tell you what you’re afraid of.”
The profiler looked out the window to Capitol Hill. If only she had gone into politics like her mother had suggested. She never would have met Jennifer Jareau.
“You’re afraid of letting her in. Afraid that once you allow yourself to love her the way you do, open up to her and share your secrets, she would leave. You are scared that you’re not enough for her. And you are positively petrified of how much that would hurt.”
Emily shook her head. “That’s not entirely true.”
“Oh?”
“I know she’ll leave.”
“How do you know that?”
“They all do.”
Now it was Rocky’s turn to sigh. She knew all too well how stubborn the Ambassador’s daughter could be.
“They all did because none of them were the one. You made some bad choices, you had your heart broken, it happens to all of us.”
“I can’t afford to lose her.”
“Forgive me, but it doesn’t really look like you’ve got her now.”
Emily got up looking around for something to clean up. The maid had done a perfect job, as usual and she found herself lacking of anything to distract her from this unsettling conversation.
“You are so sure she’s the one. You are so sure she won’t leave. You’ve never even met her.”
“Sure I have. I met her through you and that’s all I need.”
“This optimistic, romantic streak of yours if getting really old, Rocky.”
“As is this pessimistic, pseudo-realistic, paralyzing ring of ice you keep around your heart. What did this woman ever do to make you doubt her?”
When she didn’t answer Rocky went on: “Is it because you’re her first? Because she didn’t fall head over heels in love with you? Because she had doubts at the beginning? Because she has a child? Because she slept with this detective?”
“ENOUGH!”
“NO! No Emily, not this time! This is not some tramp you picked up in a bar and can’t remember the next morning. This is too important and I’m not giving up!”
“Why? Do you need to prove something?”
“Yes. I need to prove to you that you deserve to be as happy as I am.”
“Why? For crying out loud, Rocky, why?”
“Because I love you.”
Suddenly the room seemed to be drained of air. Despite their mutual trust and their unbreakable friendship, neither had said it out loud before. Not so much because of the possible misunderstandings or because there was a line they didn’t want to cross together but because Rocky had always known that Emily needed the distance.
Emily wanted nothing more than intimacy but she was afraid of it just as much. Rocky knew her better than she knew herself and had always allowed her to grow at her own rate. Seeing how her lack of insight was about to cost her the love of her life, the time for such luxuries was over.
“You’re the best friend I have on this planet and I want you to be happy. I want to see that look in your eyes I saw last winter and I want you to stop believing that Skippy will leave me or betray me or cheat on me. I want you to believe in love.”
“I… I don’t know that I can.” Emily sat down again. “If I would accept for only a moment that you are right…”
“What would happen then, Emily?”
“…I have blown my best, my only chance at happiness with the woman I love more than anything in this world.”
“You never know until you ask.”
“She will never forgive me.”
“Who says she has to?”
“She will never take me back.”
“You just need to give her a reason to.”
Emily hugged her but before she could ask how long she had planned on staying the phone rang.