Surviving Your Parents’ Interspecies Gay Love Affair | STXI | PG-13 | 1/5
Title: Surviving Your Parents’ Interspecies Gay Love Affair (1/5)
Series: STXI AU
Rating: PG-13
Length: ~785
Warnings: It’s not incest, but it’s hilarious. No - just me? Okay... Also, unbeta'ed, so there's bound to be mistakes!
Summary: T’hy’la. The final frontier. These are the tales of the Kelvin S’chn T’gai Kirk, the son of Captain (and Admiral three times, but who’s counting) Kirk and Commander (because he keeps refusing Captaincy) Spock. His life-long mission: to endure two stubborn fathers, to cover his eyes whenever necessary, and to boldly survive his parents’ interspecies gay love affair.
Disclaimer: Somewhere over the slash rainbow of my mind, it happened. But not in Kansas, unfortunately.
A/N 1: This series is entirely planned out, but I won’t be updating regularly. Luckily for you, there is absolutely no order to these stories! I write them as I’m inspired and each snippet is stand-alone in the scheme of things.
A/N 2: Dedicated to reelingstars.
Kelvin blandly inspected the figure slouched in the corner of the rundown jail cell. Dull yellow fluorescent lights flickered overhead and cast the young man in unsteady shadow - and yet his attractive features remained undeniable in the dingy environment.
Yes, Kelvin certainly had the right man.
The sound of Kelvin’s faint huff of amusement had the guy in the leather jacket stiffening and sitting up. Bright blue eyes met Kelvin’s from across the room, and it was then that Kelvin could positively identify this man as James T. Kirk at the age of twenty-two.
“Got a problem?” Kirk drawled in a tone that still held its youth.
For Kelvin to hear his father’s voice without that gruff tinge of a seasoned captain was surreal. Regardless, Kelvin merely cocked his head. “Considering your current position, I could ask you the same question.”
“What’s it t’you?”
What a sterling inquiry. Kelvin genuinely wished that this wasn’t anything to him.
Being shoved into the past in order to keep both of his father’s timelines accurate was not only bullshit - it was cheating. But according to that Q character, Kelvin had already done this in the past - hence James Kirk and S’chn T’gai Spock meeting when they did. This was a never ending circle and some twisted form of self-fulfilling prophecy.
Kelvin hated time travel.
Anyway, he was a captain now and had actual missions to complete that didn’t involve matchmaking and playing with the space-time continuum.
His parents seriously owed him for this one.
Kelvin’s smile was tight-lipped and slightly pained. “All you need to know is that I’ve posted your bail.”
Kirk lurched from his seat and stalked across the cell, with his eyes narrowed and his expression overtly suspicious. Up close, Kelvin nearly startled at the similarity between their faces. Of course he was aware that they shared certain features, but currently their ages were nearly aligned and this was akin to staring into a mirror. Well, aside from Kelvin’s notable Vulcan features.
Kirk placed one hand on the wall beside the doorway and leaned forward so that his nose nearly touched the static, humming energy bars that separated them. “Why?”
“Does it matter? You’re free to go.” Because tonight James Kirk needed to be free to start a bar-fight that would begin his destiny.
Apparently.
“Matters t’me. Have we, ah...” He surveyed Kelvin with one long sweep of eyes that left him feeling distinctly uncomfortable. Kirk licked his lips and shrugged. “Y’know - done it or something?”
Kelvin nearly choked on air as he took a step back and flung his hands up - losing his captain’s cool in the process. “What? No! Oh my god, no. That’s...” He cleared his throat and gave a neat tug to the hem of his jacket before eyeing Kirk with distress. “Just no.”
Kirk’s face was split with a grin. “All right, chill the fuck out man. I just thought that you’re hot, I’m hot...”
A narcissist in this stardate and the next.
“Of course you’d think that,” Kelvin grumbled under his breath and flicked his eyes to the ceiling as if cursing his parents from space. The things he did for them. “I’ll just let the officer on duty know that you’re prepared to be released and I’ll be on my way.”
He turned on his heel to leave, but Kirk’s shout of “Wait!” had Kelvin swivelling to regard him again.
“Yes?”
“You’re a pretty weird Vulcan and not in the way Vulcans are usually weird.”
Kelvin quirked an eyebrow. “What an astute analysis.”
Kirk scowled. “Come on, dude. Give me something to work with here. I can’t just let you go without knowing who you are.”
“You can and you will,” Kelvin replied, happy to throw his own father’s words back at him from the times when Kelvin was being particularly difficult about something. “Live long and prosper, Mr. Kirk.”
“Fucking fuck - hold up!”
Kelvin repressed a sigh and stared balefully at Kirk. He needed to get in and out. The less prolonged contact, the better. “Make this quick, Mr. Kirk. I have times and places to be.”
Kirk smiled. “Lemme just give you my phone number.”
Kelvin was going to vomit. Without another word he swept down the hallway and out of police station as fast as he could without actually running.
Never again.
Series: STXI AU
Rating: PG-13
Length: ~785
Warnings: It’s not incest, but it’s hilarious. No - just me? Okay... Also, unbeta'ed, so there's bound to be mistakes!
Summary: T’hy’la. The final frontier. These are the tales of the Kelvin S’chn T’gai Kirk, the son of Captain (and Admiral three times, but who’s counting) Kirk and Commander (because he keeps refusing Captaincy) Spock. His life-long mission: to endure two stubborn fathers, to cover his eyes whenever necessary, and to boldly survive his parents’ interspecies gay love affair.
Disclaimer: Somewhere over the slash rainbow of my mind, it happened. But not in Kansas, unfortunately.
A/N 1: This series is entirely planned out, but I won’t be updating regularly. Luckily for you, there is absolutely no order to these stories! I write them as I’m inspired and each snippet is stand-alone in the scheme of things.
A/N 2: Dedicated to reelingstars.
Kelvin blandly inspected the figure slouched in the corner of the rundown jail cell. Dull yellow fluorescent lights flickered overhead and cast the young man in unsteady shadow - and yet his attractive features remained undeniable in the dingy environment.
Yes, Kelvin certainly had the right man.
The sound of Kelvin’s faint huff of amusement had the guy in the leather jacket stiffening and sitting up. Bright blue eyes met Kelvin’s from across the room, and it was then that Kelvin could positively identify this man as James T. Kirk at the age of twenty-two.
“Got a problem?” Kirk drawled in a tone that still held its youth.
For Kelvin to hear his father’s voice without that gruff tinge of a seasoned captain was surreal. Regardless, Kelvin merely cocked his head. “Considering your current position, I could ask you the same question.”
“What’s it t’you?”
What a sterling inquiry. Kelvin genuinely wished that this wasn’t anything to him.
Being shoved into the past in order to keep both of his father’s timelines accurate was not only bullshit - it was cheating. But according to that Q character, Kelvin had already done this in the past - hence James Kirk and S’chn T’gai Spock meeting when they did. This was a never ending circle and some twisted form of self-fulfilling prophecy.
Kelvin hated time travel.
Anyway, he was a captain now and had actual missions to complete that didn’t involve matchmaking and playing with the space-time continuum.
His parents seriously owed him for this one.
Kelvin’s smile was tight-lipped and slightly pained. “All you need to know is that I’ve posted your bail.”
Kirk lurched from his seat and stalked across the cell, with his eyes narrowed and his expression overtly suspicious. Up close, Kelvin nearly startled at the similarity between their faces. Of course he was aware that they shared certain features, but currently their ages were nearly aligned and this was akin to staring into a mirror. Well, aside from Kelvin’s notable Vulcan features.
Kirk placed one hand on the wall beside the doorway and leaned forward so that his nose nearly touched the static, humming energy bars that separated them. “Why?”
“Does it matter? You’re free to go.” Because tonight James Kirk needed to be free to start a bar-fight that would begin his destiny.
Apparently.
“Matters t’me. Have we, ah...” He surveyed Kelvin with one long sweep of eyes that left him feeling distinctly uncomfortable. Kirk licked his lips and shrugged. “Y’know - done it or something?”
Kelvin nearly choked on air as he took a step back and flung his hands up - losing his captain’s cool in the process. “What? No! Oh my god, no. That’s...” He cleared his throat and gave a neat tug to the hem of his jacket before eyeing Kirk with distress. “Just no.”
Kirk’s face was split with a grin. “All right, chill the fuck out man. I just thought that you’re hot, I’m hot...”
A narcissist in this stardate and the next.
“Of course you’d think that,” Kelvin grumbled under his breath and flicked his eyes to the ceiling as if cursing his parents from space. The things he did for them. “I’ll just let the officer on duty know that you’re prepared to be released and I’ll be on my way.”
He turned on his heel to leave, but Kirk’s shout of “Wait!” had Kelvin swivelling to regard him again.
“Yes?”
“You’re a pretty weird Vulcan and not in the way Vulcans are usually weird.”
Kelvin quirked an eyebrow. “What an astute analysis.”
Kirk scowled. “Come on, dude. Give me something to work with here. I can’t just let you go without knowing who you are.”
“You can and you will,” Kelvin replied, happy to throw his own father’s words back at him from the times when Kelvin was being particularly difficult about something. “Live long and prosper, Mr. Kirk.”
“Fucking fuck - hold up!”
Kelvin repressed a sigh and stared balefully at Kirk. He needed to get in and out. The less prolonged contact, the better. “Make this quick, Mr. Kirk. I have times and places to be.”
Kirk smiled. “Lemme just give you my phone number.”
Kelvin was going to vomit. Without another word he swept down the hallway and out of police station as fast as he could without actually running.
Never again.