The Choice in a Love Game (A King Arthur 2004 fan fic)
Title: The Choice in a Love Game
Rating: PG
Character(s): Arthur, Lancera (my own creation) and OC x2
Summary: Love is fortunes game to play with whom she chooses.
Also Placed in: knightgasm
The rain pounded down against my skin as I stood between them. Arthur was to me left his eyes glowering into my back, forcing me to choose. I could smell the blood and leather soaked with damp mud. In the distance the roar of the battle reached my ears and I closed my eyes listening to the cries and the thunder of hooves.
On my right, he stood, watching me with complete astonishment, his black hair soaked to his forehead, his bangs dripping water into his dark brown eyes. I started into his face, wanting to remember every inch of it. Holding all the memories and times we had spent together.
“It’s time you decided Lancera” Merlin’s voice flowed toward me on the wind, the smell of burning wood inching my nose.
Under my clothes my scares had heeded that showed upon my flesh, but deep within a fresh wound still bled, the hot blood running from my chest down my torso and thighs. It wasn’t the kind of blood that couldn’t be seen it could only be felt.
“Are you coming darling?” her voice called to him. His head turned moving away from me. The balde cut deeper and I felt the sting of fresh tears in my eyes. As he stepped towards her I knew I would fade into memory, moving from the modern world back to my home.
I wanted to call his name, beg him to stay; I wanted to pull him from there to here.
One month, that’s all I had known him but in that time I had felt something I had never felt before. With this feeling came the sacrifice of my freedom. I felt something for him, something different, something that I think, was becoming love.
Fortune had turned cruel this time, for he already loved another, and by the time I discovered this it was too late. My heart had been placed on the spokes of her wheel and I had no way of stopping the cuts the spinning of her wheel was putting their.
“Lancera!” Arthur called again and he clouded from my vision. As the fog swarmed around me I knew that to him I was becoming a vision, a memory. Are worlds and where once again separate
“You have to make a choice now.” Arthur said his voice a light whisper.
What I had hoped would be the start of something was disappearing before my eyes. She took his hand and his gaze fell upon her. She ran her hands through those bangs I adored, leaning close she brought her face close to his. I felt fresh drips of blood and my breath closed, my horse spun uncontrollably around. I tried to pull the stallion back as his face was fading from me, but it was too late. The sword had made its cut and the deepness of the wound would take forever to heel.
Arthur met me in stride, his voice low “fortune has made her choice, its time you lived with it.”
The tears began to fall, falling deep from my broken heart.
****
The round table was empty, save me and Arthur; the candles burned low creating next to no light. Arthur had placed a glass of wine in front of me but I didn’t want to drink it for fear my memories would blur.
“Lancera” his hand brushed against my hair, forcing the dark curls to fall from their bindings.
At his touch the tears fell again and let them, biting my lip to keep from voicing the despair I felt.
“You can’t be warrior and women both; it’s always one or the other, but never both. And you are needed here, for your time with us has been of better worth then the time you spent with him.”
“I know Arthur.”
“Also it seems like he already has someone, why do you put yourself through that? Fighting for someone that is not yours to claim.”
“Arthur I did not mean to feel this way, I felt this way long before I knew about her. When we met it was a random twist of fate, and it is so wrong of me to hope that it might have been the start of something?”
Arthur said nothing for a few moments.
“Lancera you have a duty to fulfill to me and to Rome, if you want the respect of your men you must lock this away. If that boy is meant to be part of your life, then when this is all over and you return home, then fortune may bring him back to you. He does not see what you see, for he cannot as his heart belongs to another. Do not throw this away for stupidity”
“I KNOW!!|” As I raised my voice I felt his gaze harden and I quickly lowered my gaze in apology. He was as close to a father as I had, and I knew he was right.
***
The mirror glowed back at me the glass smudged with steam. I whipped my hand across it to reveal a pale face and red eyes. As the glass cleared a statured at my naked figure, my eyes roaming over the thousands of scares that resided there. Most women didn’t look like this; they had the luxury of perfection not the treason of another’s bloody war.
When men looked at me all the saw was a smart warrior, someone who was good with a sword and a horse. They didn’t see the women underneath. I knew I wasn’t unattractive, and I also knew I was much prettier then she was. And yet that only made the pain worsen as I knew he had the power to see beyond skin deep. If only he could see it with me. He could looks beyond all these scares, healing the one he had left unknowing upon my heart. He looked at me the same way they did. Like I was simply someone smart, someone to be admired, not someone to love.
The rain he returned again, I moved to stare into the mirror once more. Guinevere had been right when she had told me that love takes every ounce of freedom once possessed. One could not choose who to love nor for how long they loved. Only fortune can control that with the spinning of her wheel.
Perhaps I would see him again someday and perhaps I would still feel the same. Maybe he would be rid of her by then and fortune would show what she had planned. Or perhaps I would not care that he was free, because I would no longer love him. And just maybe, he might even decided he loved me?
I hope she heels these wounds heal soon, but the thing is, to heel what hurts the most, I must let him go, to be free again I must give into the mist.
Rating: PG
Character(s): Arthur, Lancera (my own creation) and OC x2
Summary: Love is fortunes game to play with whom she chooses.
Also Placed in: knightgasm
The rain pounded down against my skin as I stood between them. Arthur was to me left his eyes glowering into my back, forcing me to choose. I could smell the blood and leather soaked with damp mud. In the distance the roar of the battle reached my ears and I closed my eyes listening to the cries and the thunder of hooves.
On my right, he stood, watching me with complete astonishment, his black hair soaked to his forehead, his bangs dripping water into his dark brown eyes. I started into his face, wanting to remember every inch of it. Holding all the memories and times we had spent together.
“It’s time you decided Lancera” Merlin’s voice flowed toward me on the wind, the smell of burning wood inching my nose.
Under my clothes my scares had heeded that showed upon my flesh, but deep within a fresh wound still bled, the hot blood running from my chest down my torso and thighs. It wasn’t the kind of blood that couldn’t be seen it could only be felt.
“Are you coming darling?” her voice called to him. His head turned moving away from me. The balde cut deeper and I felt the sting of fresh tears in my eyes. As he stepped towards her I knew I would fade into memory, moving from the modern world back to my home.
I wanted to call his name, beg him to stay; I wanted to pull him from there to here.
One month, that’s all I had known him but in that time I had felt something I had never felt before. With this feeling came the sacrifice of my freedom. I felt something for him, something different, something that I think, was becoming love.
Fortune had turned cruel this time, for he already loved another, and by the time I discovered this it was too late. My heart had been placed on the spokes of her wheel and I had no way of stopping the cuts the spinning of her wheel was putting their.
“Lancera!” Arthur called again and he clouded from my vision. As the fog swarmed around me I knew that to him I was becoming a vision, a memory. Are worlds and where once again separate
“You have to make a choice now.” Arthur said his voice a light whisper.
What I had hoped would be the start of something was disappearing before my eyes. She took his hand and his gaze fell upon her. She ran her hands through those bangs I adored, leaning close she brought her face close to his. I felt fresh drips of blood and my breath closed, my horse spun uncontrollably around. I tried to pull the stallion back as his face was fading from me, but it was too late. The sword had made its cut and the deepness of the wound would take forever to heel.
Arthur met me in stride, his voice low “fortune has made her choice, its time you lived with it.”
The tears began to fall, falling deep from my broken heart.
****
The round table was empty, save me and Arthur; the candles burned low creating next to no light. Arthur had placed a glass of wine in front of me but I didn’t want to drink it for fear my memories would blur.
“Lancera” his hand brushed against my hair, forcing the dark curls to fall from their bindings.
At his touch the tears fell again and let them, biting my lip to keep from voicing the despair I felt.
“You can’t be warrior and women both; it’s always one or the other, but never both. And you are needed here, for your time with us has been of better worth then the time you spent with him.”
“I know Arthur.”
“Also it seems like he already has someone, why do you put yourself through that? Fighting for someone that is not yours to claim.”
“Arthur I did not mean to feel this way, I felt this way long before I knew about her. When we met it was a random twist of fate, and it is so wrong of me to hope that it might have been the start of something?”
Arthur said nothing for a few moments.
“Lancera you have a duty to fulfill to me and to Rome, if you want the respect of your men you must lock this away. If that boy is meant to be part of your life, then when this is all over and you return home, then fortune may bring him back to you. He does not see what you see, for he cannot as his heart belongs to another. Do not throw this away for stupidity”
“I KNOW!!|” As I raised my voice I felt his gaze harden and I quickly lowered my gaze in apology. He was as close to a father as I had, and I knew he was right.
***
The mirror glowed back at me the glass smudged with steam. I whipped my hand across it to reveal a pale face and red eyes. As the glass cleared a statured at my naked figure, my eyes roaming over the thousands of scares that resided there. Most women didn’t look like this; they had the luxury of perfection not the treason of another’s bloody war.
When men looked at me all the saw was a smart warrior, someone who was good with a sword and a horse. They didn’t see the women underneath. I knew I wasn’t unattractive, and I also knew I was much prettier then she was. And yet that only made the pain worsen as I knew he had the power to see beyond skin deep. If only he could see it with me. He could looks beyond all these scares, healing the one he had left unknowing upon my heart. He looked at me the same way they did. Like I was simply someone smart, someone to be admired, not someone to love.
The rain he returned again, I moved to stare into the mirror once more. Guinevere had been right when she had told me that love takes every ounce of freedom once possessed. One could not choose who to love nor for how long they loved. Only fortune can control that with the spinning of her wheel.
Perhaps I would see him again someday and perhaps I would still feel the same. Maybe he would be rid of her by then and fortune would show what she had planned. Or perhaps I would not care that he was free, because I would no longer love him. And just maybe, he might even decided he loved me?
I hope she heels these wounds heal soon, but the thing is, to heel what hurts the most, I must let him go, to be free again I must give into the mist.