Fic: The Fundraiser
Finally! I finished this fic. Thank ladyofemynarnen for her constant pestering. ;-) Hope you all like it.
Act One: Bait
Jack walks into the faculty lounge and quickly scans the room. He grins as he sees three of his targets sitting in a corner. Dr. John Sheppard sees Jack and waves him over. Dr. Daniel Jackson and Teal'c look up and give their own welcome; a smile for Daniel and a nod from Teal'c.
"Doctors," greets Jack as he sits down.
"Hey Jack," says Daniel. "Another trustee meeting?"
"Nah. Came to talk to Coach Reynolds."
"Not gonna give up on that, are you?" asks John.
"Langford's got a great team and they deserve better than playing second fiddle to the football team."
"I like football," says John.
"I was on the team," adds Teal'c.
"I don't watch either," says Daniel.
Jack groans and closes his eyes in pain. The other men at the table exchange grins. Everyone knows about Jack's constant battle to get better funding for the baseball team. Kinsey's support of the football team only fuels the fire.
"But you guys have to agree that the baseball team in unfairly underfunded," starts Jack's familiar rant.
"Jack. You know we support your...uh...support of the baseball team," says John. He accepts the teasing smiles with a shrug. He's only half way through his first cup of coffee.
"What I think Dr. Sheppard is trying to so eloquently say is that we're here to help if you need us," adds Teal'c.
"Do you mean that?" asks Jack excitedly.
"Uh..yeah," responds Daniel slowly. Jack's sudden excitement is a little suspicious.
"Great! I knew I could count on you three." Jack grins and gets up from the table to leave.
"Whoa! Wait a minute," says John. "What the hell did we just agree to?"
"Oh...sorry. Did I forget to mention the fundraiser?"
"Jack..."
"The baseball team is having an auction. Open only to the local community since you have to be accept a winning bid in person."
"And what exactly will you be auctioning?" asks Teal'c.
"It's a faculty auction," Jack says quickly and starts backing away from the table. "Glad I can count on you!"
Jack makes his escape before the other men can formulate their protests.
"I can't believe I just agreed to be part of a faculty auction," groans John.
"Maybe it won't be as embarrassing as it sounds," says Daniel.
"Doubtful," responds Teal'c. "We had one for the football team a while back. It's hard to face your students after being bartered over like a piece of meat."
"Oh God! I forgot about the students." John's forehead makes contact with the table, accompanied by another groan.
"Well," reminds Daniel. "Students do make up about 80% of the local community."
John's head comes up off the table to glare menacingly at Daniel.
"Well, Dr. Sheppard," says Teal'c. "At least you can take comfort in knowing you won't be the only one with over-eager students."
John sits up and grins at Teal'c before turning to Daniel with a smirk. The archeology professor looks back at them blankly.
"What?"
Act Two: Negotiations
Elizabeth doesn't notice someone enter her office until a shadow falls across her desk. She knows who it is and keeps her attention focused on the papers in front of her. A hand blocks her line of sight and she swats it away. The hand tries it again with the same results. Elizabeth continues to read until the stack of papers are snatched away, forcing to finally look up with a laugh.
"Hey!" Elizabeth protests. "Give those back."
"Do you have any idea what time it is?" asks John as he plops down in her guest chair.
"Not really." She looks up at the clock on the wall with a wince. It's almost ten o'clock. "What are you doing here so late? You can't possibly be hiding out from students this late at night."
John shrugs. "Nah...procrastinating on an exam I'm giving tomorrow and trying not to think of what I got roped into this morning."
"You're not helping the football team play another prank on the President, are you?"
"Not this time - hey! I never admitted to helping them."
"I think your exact words were: 'Whoever helped them break in must be a genius. I hear those numbered keypads are nearly impossible to crack.' " Elizabeth quirks an eyebrow at John, challenging him to refute her theory.
"Well...there are other geniuses on campus besides me."
"That you'd actually admit is a genius?"
"Good point." John shrugs. "But Hayes should be thankful that I talked them out of their other idea."
"John," Elizabeth reminds him. "The team Saran wrapped every item in the President's office individually, including the paper clips. It took hours to undo it all."
"But at least it was reversible. Super glue is not."
Elizabeth can only shake her head at John's way of thinking. Looking back on the event, she has to admit it had been difficult not to laugh after seeing the President's office. The football team had been meticulous in wrapping everything that wasn't nailed down. Her inability to hide her amusement at the individually wrapped paper clips had Elizabeth running back to her office in fear of being fired by a very irate President Hayes.
"So what did you get talked into this morning?" Elizabeth asks.
"Have you heard about the baseball team's faculty auction?"
Elizabeth doesn't even try to hold back her laughter.
"It's not funny."
"Yes it is," Elizabeth manages to say between chuckles.
"Fine. Laugh at my misery."
"Oh, I will." Elizabeth wipes tears out of her eyes. "That must have been why your students were squeeing this afternoon."
"You mean squealing."
"No...I believe that squee is the appropriate word."
"I don't think that's actually a word."
"But it does correctly convey what your students were doing outside your office this afternoon."
John groans and drops his head into his hands.
"How exactly did you get roped into the auction?" asks Elizabeth.
"Jack O'Neill cornered Teal'c, Daniel, and me in the lounge this morning."
"At least he's in it with you."
"Huh?" John raises his head, confusion written all over his face.
"Tell me that Jack's at least in the auction with you?"
"Uh..."
"You really need to work on your negotiation skills, John. As soon as Jack asked you to help, you should have demanded that Jack also participate."
John jumps out of the chair with a huge grin on his face.
"That's a great idea! You're a genius."
"I've always thought so."
The look on John's face is absolutely devilish as he paces in front of her desk rubbing his hands together.
"I'm going to have to play this carefully. Care to help me strategize over dinner?" he asks after a moment.
"I'd love to, but I don't think there's anyplace open this time of night."
"What about Cally's cafe?"
"She doesn't serve dinner this late."
"But she does have coffee and cheesecake."
John's grin is infectious and Elizabeth really has no choice but to stand and reach for her jacket and purse.
"Okay. But no eating half my slice this time."
Act Three: Sold!
"Teyla! Wait up."
Teyla turns and waits for Aiden to jog up to her. They've been spending more and more time together. She's no longer as suspicious or surprised by his friendship. She's even becoming more accustomed to friendly greetings from his friends even when they are not together.
He catches up and she automatically hands over her backpack. She's learned not to argue with his grandmother's upbringing.
"You going to the introductions for the auction?" Aiden asks, a little out of breath.
"Auction?"
"You don't know about the faculty auction?"
The incredulous look on Teyla's face almost makes Aiden laugh out loud.
"We are selling our faculty?"
"Well...no, not really. Technically, we're auctioning off a brunch at Cally's with the faculty. It's a fundraiser for the baseball team."
"And this is a standard practice at Langford?"
"I don't think we've had one in a while. It got too embarrassing for the faculty. That's why the team's doing an online auction this time around."
Teyla shrugs. There are still many customs she doesn't understand.
"Are all of the faculty being sold?"
"No. Just a few of the male faculty. They're being introduced at the Community Center tonight. I think Sheppard, Jackson, McKay...oh, and Teal'c."
"Dr. Gifa?"
"Yeah...not sure how he got talked into it."
"Then it is unfortunate that I do not have much money to use in the auction."
Teyla doesn't notice Aiden's steps falter.
"You'd bid on Teal'c?"
"Yes. I very much admire Dr. Gifa and have been very grateful for his guidance."
"Oh. So you don't...uh...have other...um...reasons for bidding on Dr. Gifa?
Teyla is only barely able to conceal her smile at Aiden's attempt at being nonchalant.
"I do have one other reason."
"Really?!"
Teyla smiles, taking pity on him.
"I have never been to Cally's and have heard that the food there is very good."
"Oh." Aiden is clearly relieved at her answer. "Maybe I could...uh...take you there on Friday. They have awesome cheesecake."
"I would very much like that."
Act Four: Ladies Night
"I can't believe you talked me into coming to this thing," grumbles Sam.
"Oh stop complaining already!" chastises Janet. "You need to get out of that lab more often anyway."
"Definitely," agrees Elizabeth. "That little war you've got going with Dr. McKay is getting a little out of hand."
"Ugh. Don't remind me. He's been strutting around the lab all week since he was asked to participate in the auction. I swear he made Radek go over his damn bio for the introduction a hundred times. I can't believe I'm going to sit through it again."
"It's nice to know that seeing Jack outweighs your revulsion of McKay," teases Janet.
Sam blushes a bright shade of pink as she turns to her friend indignantly.
"Like you're not here to see a certain accident prone archaeologist."
"I don't need to come here to see Daniel. I see enough of him in my clinic. I'm here to gather ammunition to tease the hell out of Carson."
"Like we believe that."
"Did I tell you that he managed to twist his ankle tripping on some steps in the library?"
"I assume you mean Daniel," clarifies Elizabeth.
"Of course. Carson only gets hurt when he's around Rodney."
"Wait. There aren't any stairs in the library."
"Oh, but there is. Three to be exact. From the main floor down to the History section."
"Poor Daniel," chuckles Sam.
"That's assuming he's not doing it on purpose just to see Janet," says Elizabeth with a sly smile.
"No," responds Janet after a moment of thought. "I've seen him walking around campus. If he tried to injure himself on purpose, he'd end up in the hospital, not my clinic."
"Good point, but that doesn't mean he hasn't noticed you."
"I never said I wanted to be noticed. Besides, the man is oblivious. He doesn't even know that most of his students are madly in love with him. Does he really think that 'History of the Ancient Pyramids' is what packs his classes?"
"So are you bidding on him?" asks Sam.
"No..."
"Why not?"
"Are you bidding on Jack?"
Sam blushes and shakes her head.
"Sam," Elizabeth says with a sigh. "This thing, whatever the hell it is, has been going on for years. We all see how you look at each other at trustee functions. Don't you think it's about time to do something about it?"
Janet nods her agreement.
"I don't have much cash to throw around," is Sam's response. "We professors don't make as much as deans."
Elizabeth rolls her eyes, but knows it's useless to argue.
The lights dim and Coach Reynolds walks onto the front of the stage with a smile. Behind him, the various male faculty member walk out from behind the curtain. Daniel, blinded by the stage lights, trips and stumbles into Teal'c. John walks out behind Daniel and grabs his arm to keep him from falling on his face. There's an immediate response from the girls in the front row as the two most popular professors make their appearance.
"Oh this is going to be fun."
Act Five: And the winner is...
"Your brunch date is going to be a little late."
John looks up as Coach Grey Reynolds takes the vacant seat in front of him.
"I thought we weren't calling them dates?"
"We're not. I just enjoy that look you get on your face when I mention the woman who paid $5,000 to have brunch with you."
Reynolds' grin only gets wider at John's groan.
"You're really not amusing, Greg. I really don't know whether to be flattered or scared."
"Oh, definitely flattered. Besides, you raised the most money - doesn't that get you some gloating credit?"
"That's highly dependent on who shows up."
"Believe me when I say you won't be disappointed."
The baseball coach has been steadfast in his silence. None of the other faculty up for auction had found out who their winning bids were until they arrived at the cafe. Left with no other choice, John has to do some quick deduction.
"Well you already said it's a woman, so that's a relief."
John and Greg both snicker as they look over at Dr. McKay and his winning bidder. Rodney was more than a little irate at arriving this morning, only to find one of his senior physics students sitting at his table. The professor had been mortified. At least now they seemed to be deep in conversation and enjoying themselves - probably arguing over quantum mechanics theory or something equally snore-worthy.
"I'm at a table for two, so you aren't putting me through the same torture as Daniel."
Dr. Jackson is currently seated with four of his students at one of the cafe's larger tables. The girls are all staring, glassy-eyed at the archeaology professor while he is valiantly trying to finish his brunch. The four students had pooled all their money and, taking advantage of a hole in the rules, demanded that they all be allowed to have brunch with Daniel.
"At least Jack seemed to do okay," says Coach Reynolds.
"I'm not so sure about that."
Jack is looking very uncomfortable sitting across from the woman who was his highest bidder. The woman is attractive enough - slim figure, short dirty-blonde hair, interesting accent. Unfortunately, her taste in clothing left much to be desired, if not much to the imagination. She was wearing a tight fitting midrift top and even tighter pants, both of which looked like they were made of leather. Whatever she's saying to Jack, it's making him sit as far back from the table as is physically possible without actually walking away.
"I think the only ones who've done well are Carson and Teal'c."
Doctors Beckett and Gifa have blonde, attractive women at their tables. The women are about as different from one another as the two men. Beckett's companion is somewhat demure with her hair pulled back in a bun and her lace collar buttoned all the way up. Gifa's new friend exudes confidence from her low cut blouse to the tips of her flowing blonde hair.
"I wouldn't be so sure," responds Greg as he stands. "Your non-date is here."
John turns and almost falls out of his chair. Dr. Elizabeth Weir is walking towards his table, ignoring the sudden silence in the small cafe. She greets John with a warm smile as she sits across from him.
"Morning. Sorry I'm late."
Elizabeth picks up a menu and starts to read it. John is still dumbstruck.
"I think I'll have the Eggs Benedict. What are you getting?"
She waits patiently for John to answer. A full minute passes.
"Denver omelet."
"Hmm...you'll have to let me try a bite."
"Okay....wait! Wait a minute. You paid $5,000 to have brunch with me?"
"I figured it was worth it."
John is, once again, speechless.
"I have to confess something," says Elizabeth seriously.
"Uh-huh..."
"I haven't practiced law in a long time. I'd make a horrible defense attorney in a sexual harrassment case."
There's another moment of silence before John is overcome with laughter. It doesn't take long for Elizabeth to join him - neither of them caring that the rest of the cafe is staring at them.
It takes a while for John to recover his ability to speak.
"You're joking, right?"
"Not really. You don't want to know what one of your students was planning outside my office last week."
John can only shake his head.
"Thanks, but you need to let me pay you back."
"No I don't."
"But..."
"No buts. I'm glad to do it. It is for a good cause."
John's eyes narrow. Elizabeth doesn't look at all put out by giving that much money away.
"Deans must make much more than us lowly professors."
Elizabeth lets out another chuckle and John is slowly realizing that he likes seeing her like this a little too much.
"Well, we do," is her response. "But it's more a donation from my father. He left me some money and, since he was a die-hard Red Sox fan, I'm sure he'd be happy to know where it was going."
"Okay, but I owe you."
"Yes, you do."
The twinkle in Elizabeth's eyes makes a shiver run down John's spine, causing him to flash his standard smirk.
"Think Cally will serve us cheesecake for brunch?"
The End...
Act One: Bait
Jack walks into the faculty lounge and quickly scans the room. He grins as he sees three of his targets sitting in a corner. Dr. John Sheppard sees Jack and waves him over. Dr. Daniel Jackson and Teal'c look up and give their own welcome; a smile for Daniel and a nod from Teal'c.
"Doctors," greets Jack as he sits down.
"Hey Jack," says Daniel. "Another trustee meeting?"
"Nah. Came to talk to Coach Reynolds."
"Not gonna give up on that, are you?" asks John.
"Langford's got a great team and they deserve better than playing second fiddle to the football team."
"I like football," says John.
"I was on the team," adds Teal'c.
"I don't watch either," says Daniel.
Jack groans and closes his eyes in pain. The other men at the table exchange grins. Everyone knows about Jack's constant battle to get better funding for the baseball team. Kinsey's support of the football team only fuels the fire.
"But you guys have to agree that the baseball team in unfairly underfunded," starts Jack's familiar rant.
"Jack. You know we support your...uh...support of the baseball team," says John. He accepts the teasing smiles with a shrug. He's only half way through his first cup of coffee.
"What I think Dr. Sheppard is trying to so eloquently say is that we're here to help if you need us," adds Teal'c.
"Do you mean that?" asks Jack excitedly.
"Uh..yeah," responds Daniel slowly. Jack's sudden excitement is a little suspicious.
"Great! I knew I could count on you three." Jack grins and gets up from the table to leave.
"Whoa! Wait a minute," says John. "What the hell did we just agree to?"
"Oh...sorry. Did I forget to mention the fundraiser?"
"Jack..."
"The baseball team is having an auction. Open only to the local community since you have to be accept a winning bid in person."
"And what exactly will you be auctioning?" asks Teal'c.
"It's a faculty auction," Jack says quickly and starts backing away from the table. "Glad I can count on you!"
Jack makes his escape before the other men can formulate their protests.
"I can't believe I just agreed to be part of a faculty auction," groans John.
"Maybe it won't be as embarrassing as it sounds," says Daniel.
"Doubtful," responds Teal'c. "We had one for the football team a while back. It's hard to face your students after being bartered over like a piece of meat."
"Oh God! I forgot about the students." John's forehead makes contact with the table, accompanied by another groan.
"Well," reminds Daniel. "Students do make up about 80% of the local community."
John's head comes up off the table to glare menacingly at Daniel.
"Well, Dr. Sheppard," says Teal'c. "At least you can take comfort in knowing you won't be the only one with over-eager students."
John sits up and grins at Teal'c before turning to Daniel with a smirk. The archeology professor looks back at them blankly.
"What?"
Act Two: Negotiations
Elizabeth doesn't notice someone enter her office until a shadow falls across her desk. She knows who it is and keeps her attention focused on the papers in front of her. A hand blocks her line of sight and she swats it away. The hand tries it again with the same results. Elizabeth continues to read until the stack of papers are snatched away, forcing to finally look up with a laugh.
"Hey!" Elizabeth protests. "Give those back."
"Do you have any idea what time it is?" asks John as he plops down in her guest chair.
"Not really." She looks up at the clock on the wall with a wince. It's almost ten o'clock. "What are you doing here so late? You can't possibly be hiding out from students this late at night."
John shrugs. "Nah...procrastinating on an exam I'm giving tomorrow and trying not to think of what I got roped into this morning."
"You're not helping the football team play another prank on the President, are you?"
"Not this time - hey! I never admitted to helping them."
"I think your exact words were: 'Whoever helped them break in must be a genius. I hear those numbered keypads are nearly impossible to crack.' " Elizabeth quirks an eyebrow at John, challenging him to refute her theory.
"Well...there are other geniuses on campus besides me."
"That you'd actually admit is a genius?"
"Good point." John shrugs. "But Hayes should be thankful that I talked them out of their other idea."
"John," Elizabeth reminds him. "The team Saran wrapped every item in the President's office individually, including the paper clips. It took hours to undo it all."
"But at least it was reversible. Super glue is not."
Elizabeth can only shake her head at John's way of thinking. Looking back on the event, she has to admit it had been difficult not to laugh after seeing the President's office. The football team had been meticulous in wrapping everything that wasn't nailed down. Her inability to hide her amusement at the individually wrapped paper clips had Elizabeth running back to her office in fear of being fired by a very irate President Hayes.
"So what did you get talked into this morning?" Elizabeth asks.
"Have you heard about the baseball team's faculty auction?"
Elizabeth doesn't even try to hold back her laughter.
"It's not funny."
"Yes it is," Elizabeth manages to say between chuckles.
"Fine. Laugh at my misery."
"Oh, I will." Elizabeth wipes tears out of her eyes. "That must have been why your students were squeeing this afternoon."
"You mean squealing."
"No...I believe that squee is the appropriate word."
"I don't think that's actually a word."
"But it does correctly convey what your students were doing outside your office this afternoon."
John groans and drops his head into his hands.
"How exactly did you get roped into the auction?" asks Elizabeth.
"Jack O'Neill cornered Teal'c, Daniel, and me in the lounge this morning."
"At least he's in it with you."
"Huh?" John raises his head, confusion written all over his face.
"Tell me that Jack's at least in the auction with you?"
"Uh..."
"You really need to work on your negotiation skills, John. As soon as Jack asked you to help, you should have demanded that Jack also participate."
John jumps out of the chair with a huge grin on his face.
"That's a great idea! You're a genius."
"I've always thought so."
The look on John's face is absolutely devilish as he paces in front of her desk rubbing his hands together.
"I'm going to have to play this carefully. Care to help me strategize over dinner?" he asks after a moment.
"I'd love to, but I don't think there's anyplace open this time of night."
"What about Cally's cafe?"
"She doesn't serve dinner this late."
"But she does have coffee and cheesecake."
John's grin is infectious and Elizabeth really has no choice but to stand and reach for her jacket and purse.
"Okay. But no eating half my slice this time."
Act Three: Sold!
"Teyla! Wait up."
Teyla turns and waits for Aiden to jog up to her. They've been spending more and more time together. She's no longer as suspicious or surprised by his friendship. She's even becoming more accustomed to friendly greetings from his friends even when they are not together.
He catches up and she automatically hands over her backpack. She's learned not to argue with his grandmother's upbringing.
"You going to the introductions for the auction?" Aiden asks, a little out of breath.
"Auction?"
"You don't know about the faculty auction?"
The incredulous look on Teyla's face almost makes Aiden laugh out loud.
"We are selling our faculty?"
"Well...no, not really. Technically, we're auctioning off a brunch at Cally's with the faculty. It's a fundraiser for the baseball team."
"And this is a standard practice at Langford?"
"I don't think we've had one in a while. It got too embarrassing for the faculty. That's why the team's doing an online auction this time around."
Teyla shrugs. There are still many customs she doesn't understand.
"Are all of the faculty being sold?"
"No. Just a few of the male faculty. They're being introduced at the Community Center tonight. I think Sheppard, Jackson, McKay...oh, and Teal'c."
"Dr. Gifa?"
"Yeah...not sure how he got talked into it."
"Then it is unfortunate that I do not have much money to use in the auction."
Teyla doesn't notice Aiden's steps falter.
"You'd bid on Teal'c?"
"Yes. I very much admire Dr. Gifa and have been very grateful for his guidance."
"Oh. So you don't...uh...have other...um...reasons for bidding on Dr. Gifa?
Teyla is only barely able to conceal her smile at Aiden's attempt at being nonchalant.
"I do have one other reason."
"Really?!"
Teyla smiles, taking pity on him.
"I have never been to Cally's and have heard that the food there is very good."
"Oh." Aiden is clearly relieved at her answer. "Maybe I could...uh...take you there on Friday. They have awesome cheesecake."
"I would very much like that."
Act Four: Ladies Night
"I can't believe you talked me into coming to this thing," grumbles Sam.
"Oh stop complaining already!" chastises Janet. "You need to get out of that lab more often anyway."
"Definitely," agrees Elizabeth. "That little war you've got going with Dr. McKay is getting a little out of hand."
"Ugh. Don't remind me. He's been strutting around the lab all week since he was asked to participate in the auction. I swear he made Radek go over his damn bio for the introduction a hundred times. I can't believe I'm going to sit through it again."
"It's nice to know that seeing Jack outweighs your revulsion of McKay," teases Janet.
Sam blushes a bright shade of pink as she turns to her friend indignantly.
"Like you're not here to see a certain accident prone archaeologist."
"I don't need to come here to see Daniel. I see enough of him in my clinic. I'm here to gather ammunition to tease the hell out of Carson."
"Like we believe that."
"Did I tell you that he managed to twist his ankle tripping on some steps in the library?"
"I assume you mean Daniel," clarifies Elizabeth.
"Of course. Carson only gets hurt when he's around Rodney."
"Wait. There aren't any stairs in the library."
"Oh, but there is. Three to be exact. From the main floor down to the History section."
"Poor Daniel," chuckles Sam.
"That's assuming he's not doing it on purpose just to see Janet," says Elizabeth with a sly smile.
"No," responds Janet after a moment of thought. "I've seen him walking around campus. If he tried to injure himself on purpose, he'd end up in the hospital, not my clinic."
"Good point, but that doesn't mean he hasn't noticed you."
"I never said I wanted to be noticed. Besides, the man is oblivious. He doesn't even know that most of his students are madly in love with him. Does he really think that 'History of the Ancient Pyramids' is what packs his classes?"
"So are you bidding on him?" asks Sam.
"No..."
"Why not?"
"Are you bidding on Jack?"
Sam blushes and shakes her head.
"Sam," Elizabeth says with a sigh. "This thing, whatever the hell it is, has been going on for years. We all see how you look at each other at trustee functions. Don't you think it's about time to do something about it?"
Janet nods her agreement.
"I don't have much cash to throw around," is Sam's response. "We professors don't make as much as deans."
Elizabeth rolls her eyes, but knows it's useless to argue.
The lights dim and Coach Reynolds walks onto the front of the stage with a smile. Behind him, the various male faculty member walk out from behind the curtain. Daniel, blinded by the stage lights, trips and stumbles into Teal'c. John walks out behind Daniel and grabs his arm to keep him from falling on his face. There's an immediate response from the girls in the front row as the two most popular professors make their appearance.
"Oh this is going to be fun."
Act Five: And the winner is...
"Your brunch date is going to be a little late."
John looks up as Coach Grey Reynolds takes the vacant seat in front of him.
"I thought we weren't calling them dates?"
"We're not. I just enjoy that look you get on your face when I mention the woman who paid $5,000 to have brunch with you."
Reynolds' grin only gets wider at John's groan.
"You're really not amusing, Greg. I really don't know whether to be flattered or scared."
"Oh, definitely flattered. Besides, you raised the most money - doesn't that get you some gloating credit?"
"That's highly dependent on who shows up."
"Believe me when I say you won't be disappointed."
The baseball coach has been steadfast in his silence. None of the other faculty up for auction had found out who their winning bids were until they arrived at the cafe. Left with no other choice, John has to do some quick deduction.
"Well you already said it's a woman, so that's a relief."
John and Greg both snicker as they look over at Dr. McKay and his winning bidder. Rodney was more than a little irate at arriving this morning, only to find one of his senior physics students sitting at his table. The professor had been mortified. At least now they seemed to be deep in conversation and enjoying themselves - probably arguing over quantum mechanics theory or something equally snore-worthy.
"I'm at a table for two, so you aren't putting me through the same torture as Daniel."
Dr. Jackson is currently seated with four of his students at one of the cafe's larger tables. The girls are all staring, glassy-eyed at the archeaology professor while he is valiantly trying to finish his brunch. The four students had pooled all their money and, taking advantage of a hole in the rules, demanded that they all be allowed to have brunch with Daniel.
"At least Jack seemed to do okay," says Coach Reynolds.
"I'm not so sure about that."
Jack is looking very uncomfortable sitting across from the woman who was his highest bidder. The woman is attractive enough - slim figure, short dirty-blonde hair, interesting accent. Unfortunately, her taste in clothing left much to be desired, if not much to the imagination. She was wearing a tight fitting midrift top and even tighter pants, both of which looked like they were made of leather. Whatever she's saying to Jack, it's making him sit as far back from the table as is physically possible without actually walking away.
"I think the only ones who've done well are Carson and Teal'c."
Doctors Beckett and Gifa have blonde, attractive women at their tables. The women are about as different from one another as the two men. Beckett's companion is somewhat demure with her hair pulled back in a bun and her lace collar buttoned all the way up. Gifa's new friend exudes confidence from her low cut blouse to the tips of her flowing blonde hair.
"I wouldn't be so sure," responds Greg as he stands. "Your non-date is here."
John turns and almost falls out of his chair. Dr. Elizabeth Weir is walking towards his table, ignoring the sudden silence in the small cafe. She greets John with a warm smile as she sits across from him.
"Morning. Sorry I'm late."
Elizabeth picks up a menu and starts to read it. John is still dumbstruck.
"I think I'll have the Eggs Benedict. What are you getting?"
She waits patiently for John to answer. A full minute passes.
"Denver omelet."
"Hmm...you'll have to let me try a bite."
"Okay....wait! Wait a minute. You paid $5,000 to have brunch with me?"
"I figured it was worth it."
John is, once again, speechless.
"I have to confess something," says Elizabeth seriously.
"Uh-huh..."
"I haven't practiced law in a long time. I'd make a horrible defense attorney in a sexual harrassment case."
There's another moment of silence before John is overcome with laughter. It doesn't take long for Elizabeth to join him - neither of them caring that the rest of the cafe is staring at them.
It takes a while for John to recover his ability to speak.
"You're joking, right?"
"Not really. You don't want to know what one of your students was planning outside my office last week."
John can only shake his head.
"Thanks, but you need to let me pay you back."
"No I don't."
"But..."
"No buts. I'm glad to do it. It is for a good cause."
John's eyes narrow. Elizabeth doesn't look at all put out by giving that much money away.
"Deans must make much more than us lowly professors."
Elizabeth lets out another chuckle and John is slowly realizing that he likes seeing her like this a little too much.
"Well, we do," is her response. "But it's more a donation from my father. He left me some money and, since he was a die-hard Red Sox fan, I'm sure he'd be happy to know where it was going."
"Okay, but I owe you."
"Yes, you do."
The twinkle in Elizabeth's eyes makes a shiver run down John's spine, causing him to flash his standard smirk.
"Think Cally will serve us cheesecake for brunch?"
The End...