ＫちゃんNEWS 2016年01月05日where Koyama is being molested, Shige confesses to Tegoshi and Tegomass kabe-don
I assume this broadcast wasn’t live but was likely recorded at the same time as the live one. I was gonna do only highlights but in the end I only skipped some parts. The intro was just some light fooling around.
T: My friends look forward to k-chan news.
K: Right.
S: Me too. When I get home I listen to it. Tegoshi is terrible!
M: When Tegoshi is on it’s hard to listen to.
T: No way! Really?
M: When it’s Tegoshi and Koyama it’s hard to listen to, you’re so loud.
K: “When it’s Tegoshi and Koyama”, since I’m in there too.
M: Are you a permanent cast?
T: No, he’s a guest.
S: He’s a pinch hitter.
T: He does it when I can’t.
K: So I’ve been a guest for 10 years?
T: Yes, long run! Naisu long run guest!
S: Naisu!
K: So it’s 2016, let’s go with the 1st song. To be released on January 20, NEWS’ new song “Touch”!
T: Touching Shige!
S: Waaah!
After the song, NEWS play the so-called Hikari ni Shizuku/Touch/Yonjuushi game which is basically the same as the ones they played before. Koyama explains the rules once again.
T: The Prince game.
S: It is!
T: I know, right?
S: All this time we’ve been playing the Prince game.
K: Well, you can call it a Prince game but this is a manly edition.
T: *sings a rendition of Taro’s “Danjo”*
K: …anyway, we did Princess Kaguya game and Maharajah game. Last time for some reason everyone got naked.
T: Koyama gets to be the King so much!
K: Really?
S: You always win.
K: This might happen today too. So here we go.
S: Do we pull the sticks first? Koyama even pulls the last.
T: So there will be no complaints.
K: Right. Go! Who’s the king? It really is me.
S: Amazing! I even changed mine.
K: Amazing! Damn!
T: You were filming this show with Daigo-san so you learned from him.
K: Mentalism! Okay then…
S: Say the numbers!
K: #1 shall say what he likes about #2.
T: Well, that is a light start.
S: There’s no harm for #2.
K: …while holding their hands.
T: Don’t joke around!
M/T: What is this addition?
K: And not what he likes, but what he loves, looking into the other’s eyes. Who’s #1?
S: Me.
K: Who’s #2?
T: Me.
T&S: *laughing*
T: Oddly enough, we’re right next to each other!
S: It’s even easier to do it.
T: Oddly enough, we’re right next to each other!
K: Do it properly! Seriously. Connect hands “lover style”, look at each other. *giggle*
S: Tegoshi has a really cute face. Really cute face and a good voice…
K: That’s not it.
S: A good voice and beautiful eyes…
K: Something you really like, really like.
S: But I really do like it.
K: Something more about his personality.
S: If it’s about his personality then… even when he complains he still does his job properly.
T: *laughing*
S: *starts laughing too”
K: Ok, thank you very much!
T: I’m not good with being attacked like that, I can’t meet eyes…
S: Lately I can do stuff like this.
T: That’s right.
S: I got mentally stronger.
K: Okay, this time I pull first. Oh, it’s not me. Who’s the king?
M: YES!
S: Isn’t this the first time Massu is the king? Masuking!
M: You can buy the masking tape at Tamiya.
S: I get it! (laughing) Whatever.
M: Okay. #1 sits in #3′s lap and does the whole show like this.
S: Whoa!
M: Ok, who’s #1?
K: Me… Koyama.
M: Who’s #3?
T: Meeeeh.
S: So it’s #1 who sits?
M: #1 sits in #3′s lap.
T: The opposite! The opposite!
M: Is the microphone gonna be ok? How is…
K: AAAAAAAA! TEGOSHI! STOP IT!
T: *creepy laugh*
K: I am being targeted! How do I explain this?
S: Your important part? Koyama Junior? [so helpful, Shige]
K: My important part is being touched.
S: It’s not really touched, more like pushed. [so helpful]
K: My… My…
M: Hurry up. Who’s the king?
S: YEAH! What should I do?
K: Let go, why do you keep touching it?
S: But I mean…
K: Stop touching it, really…
S: In January we had HenLab…
K: Get your hand off me.
S: So I thought we could expand the topic…
K: Stop touching…
S: Massu had to do a kabe-don.
M: I see.
S: So…
K: Stop it…
S: #2 kabe-dons #1 and says what he likes about him.
K: That’s good, good… Stop it.
K/S: Who’s #2?
T: Me.
K: Who’s #1?
M: Me.
K: Yaaay! Go go!
T: I have perfect attendance today! Dammit!
K: In a way I feel like a have been spared. (it was a joke, he said “lifting a ban” while Tegoshi said “perfect attendance”, both phrases sound the same in Japanese)
T: Beaujolais Koyama! [??]
K: Kabe-don!
S: Oh, he’s turning around. Like a girl waiting on her date. Masuko!
T: What I like about him?
M: *whistling*
K: Do it properly!
S: He’s whistling!
T: Should I do kabe-don after I walk up to him?
M: Tek tek tek tek tek… ooh!
K: He did the kabe-don.
T: Thank you for always thinking about NEWS… What is this?
S: Thank you for always thinking about NEWS?
T: Yes. He’s always thinking about [NEWS], and before the concerts are decided he does…
S: *laughing* Your face changed…
M: Also while looking at me his eyes were shifting.
T: I can’t do this! What is this?
S: He’s really weak when the camera isn’t rolling. ♥
M: He’s really cute.
T: So monotone.
K: But he really is cute, Tegoshi.
M: Why are you so nervous?
T: I don’t like this!
K: The fact that he gets shy is cute. [says the man whole balls he just grabbed]
T: *laughing* Let Guy-san do it next.
S: His wrinkled T-shirt is cute.
M: You start to think why it’s crumpled.
S: You were lazy to fold it, right?~
T: No. I forgot to pan pan pan!
S: Pan pan pan?
K: Do it once more!
K/S/M: Kawaiii~
T: This is hell. I seriously hate it.
K: Last one! Last one!
T: I still didn’t get to be the king.
S: You’re the only one who wasn’t?
T: Not even once!
K: Who’s the king?
S: Me.
K: Good! Think carefully.
S: It’s the last one. Well, the ones up until now were done in pairs, let’s have a solo one.
K/T: That’s something new.
S: The king has too much authority. We’re gonna wrap it up, right? This corner? Since it’s the last one this person is going to say something really sweet for the 2016 fans.
K: I hope it’s Massu…
S: #1! Who’s #1?
K: …me.
S: It has to be sweeet! Think of fans as your lovers.
T: You’re a guest so you should do it.
K: What do you mean a guest? 2016?
S: 2016 so… I got it, your lover is listening to the radio…
K: So I’m using the radio waves?
S: Yes!
M: Why did you get off?
K: Huh??
S: You got off after the kabe-don.
K: Should I get back?
T: You’re so heavy~
S: Unexpectedly…
K: WAAAH! NOO! In this state if something happens, it might be reflected in my voice.
M: That’s no good.
K: Ok, here I go. Can you hear me? You can tell I’m on the radio right now… I wanted to express my feelings towards you. I’m going to take some time so I’ll be happy if you listen… You were always by my side ugh… I really love you ugh… let’s be together always… so here I’ll play a song for you. Hikari no……
M: Do it properly!
*Hikari no Shizuku*
Then after the song they spoke to Guy-san.
K: What does Guy-san expect from 2016?
S: Give NEWS a message.
K: We want it!
G: I hope NEWS remains as close as they are.
As expected, Guy-san is a shipper too. Finally, they talked a little about upcoming projects and especially Shige’s film premiere. Shige was especially anxious for Massu to see it. He also suggested they go see it all together sometime. Massu teased with a “maybe when the DVD comes out…” So mean. But in the end they made him do a cheesy message with a kiss.
M: So, let’s spend a warm night…..heeheheee.
S: There is this face again! There it is!
K: Goodbye!~
That is all, hoped you enjoyed this. I think it was the lewdest one so far. I really don't get how Tegoshi’s shyness works tbh. Looking into someone’s eyes is embarrassing but touching someone’s special places is totally fine?