Krel, you fuck.
[9:04:47p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) Meatballs it is, then.
[9:08:57p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) So the question is: Sauce and meatballs in the same pan, or separate pans?
[9:09:26p] [Alixsar] Krel, you're...
[9:09:34p] [Doomgaze] hopeless?
[9:09:38p] [Alixsar] Seperate, weirdo.
[9:09:50p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) Hmm.... don't have three pans.
[9:09:54p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) This could be a problem.
[9:09:58p] [Alixsar] What's the other one for?
[9:10:11p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) One for meatballs, one for tomato sauce, one for pasta =o
[9:10:12p] [@Ally] Noodles?
[9:10:19p] [@Ally] Hah, I rule.
[9:10:19p] [Alixsar] ...tomato sauce AND another sauce?
[9:10:25p] [Alixsar] Ah.
[9:10:45p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) Yep. I'm going to put hollandaise sauce on them. *g*
*pause* *does unholy things to meatballs*
[9:21:26p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) ...ok.
[9:21:30p] (@Krel|Xenosaga) That didn't work too well.
[9:21:33p] »» nick change [ Krel|Xenosaga » Krel|cooking ]
[9:21:38p] (@Krel|cooking) Alright, help.
[9:21:55p] (@Krel|cooking) The package on the frozen meatballs said to put them in a pan and heat them for 25-30 minutes.
[9:21:58p] (@Krel|cooking) I put them in a pan.
[9:22:08p] (@Krel|cooking) They started burning after 15-30 SECONDS.
[9:22:17p] (@Krel|cooking) Something's wrong here.
[9:23:29p] (@Krel|cooking) I don't think there would be any meatballs left after 30 minutes.
[9:23:33p] (@Krel|cooking) Not at the rate they're going.
[9:23:42p] (@Krel|cooking) And my apartment has filled with smoke.
[9:23:48p] (@Krel|cooking) Like, completely.
[9:23:53p] [Alixsar] Maybe you should stop then.
[9:23:56p] (@Krel|cooking) I did.
[9:24:02p] [@Ally] ... Uh, what setting or whatever did you have the stove on?
[9:24:07p] (@Krel|cooking) ...hi.
[9:24:07p] [@Ally] Or whatever you were using.
[9:24:10p] (@Krel|cooking) There's another setting?
[9:24:21p] [Alixsar] Heh.
[9:24:27p] [Alixsar] You're funny.
[9:24:31p] [Doomgaze] Ally... at least you're not this bad ^_^
[9:24:33p] [@Ally] It's your stove.
[9:24:37p] [@Ally] Thank God.
[9:24:38p] (@Krel|cooking) I cook everything on hi. I thought you were supposed to do that.
[9:24:44p] [Doomgaze] *snickers*
[9:24:44p] [@Ally] ...
[9:24:48p] * @Ally dies.
[9:24:49p] (@Krel|cooking) When these packages say "HEAT" I figure they want the full blast.
[9:25:04p] [Doomgaze] Why not just use an acetylene torch while you're at it?
[9:25:12p] (@Krel|cooking) hmm. Alright then, *turns the heat down*
[9:25:16p] [@Ally] VERY GOOD.
[9:25:53p] [Alixsar] Heh.
[9:25:58p] [Alixsar] Again, you are funny.
[9:26:56p] (@Krel|cooking) Man, I hope my landlady doesn't decide to drop by =o
[9:27:09p] (@Krel|cooking) My roommate's going to have a tough time finding his way to his room.
*pause number 2*
[9:28:53p] (@Krel|cooking) ......
[9:28:54p] (@Krel|cooking) oops.
[9:29:11p] (@Krel|cooking) Note to self: Using your plastic spoon to move the meatballs around isn't a good idea.
[9:29:15p] (@Krel|cooking) Byebye plastic spoon.
[9:29:17p] [@Ally] ...
[9:29:20p] (@Krel|cooking) Hello half-plastic spoon.
[9:29:21p] [Doomgaze] xD
[9:29:25p] [@Ally] One word, two syllables.
[9:29:26p] [@Ally] DUMBASS.
[9:29:36p] * Alixsar laughs
[9:29:49p] (@Krel|cooking) Hey, I've never cooked meat before *cries*
[9:29:58p] [Hitokoei] ...
[9:30:00p] [Doomgaze] How long before he busts the front of the microwave open and cooks an egg on a skewer?
[9:30:01p] [Hitokoei] Krel.
[9:30:01p] (@Krel|cooking) And when these directions say "COOK" I get a little confused.
[9:30:03p] [@Ally] Neither have I, but I know not to use a PLASTIC FUCKING SPOON.
[9:30:05p] [Hitokoei] God.
[9:30:22p] [@Ally] Krel...hun...
[9:30:22p] [Phil] I'm gonna start printing *stupid* labels from now on
[9:30:26p] (@Krel|cooking) Alright, I think my pasta water's boiling over.
[9:30:28p] [Phil] you're the first recipient, krel
[9:30:29p] (@Krel|cooking) Be back in a bit.
[9:30:29p] [Alixsar] Heh
[9:30:31p] [@Ally] for your sake, I hope you can find a nice girlfriend whoh can cook well.
[9:30:37p] [@Ally] who.
[9:30:38p] (@Krel|cooking) Yes.
[9:30:38p] [Phil] *puts the *STUPID* label on Krel's forhead.
[9:30:55p] [@Ally] Hell, I'll go out there and find someone for you. So you don't, like, starve or something.
[9:31:19p] [@Ally] Or *I* will cook for you. Christ.
*pause yet again*
[9:33:48p] (@Krel|cooking) Learning experiences.
[9:33:50p] (@Krel|cooking) Yes.
[9:33:54p] (@Krel|cooking) These are learning experiences.
[9:34:07p] (@Krel|cooking) *finds his way to all the windows in his apartment and opens them*
[9:34:32p] (@Krel|cooking) I turned the heat down to 3 out of 10.
[9:34:36p] [@Ally] Good.
[9:34:38p] (@Krel|cooking) The meatballs are still burninating.
[9:34:52p] (@Krel|cooking) Like, quickly. Faster than 25-30 minutes.
[9:35:00p] [+Ugtroll] xD
[9:35:06p] (@Krel|cooking) And... the apartment's filling up with smoke again. Be right back.
[9:35:23p] * @Ally predicts a firetruck or something is going to arrive soon.
[9:35:43p] * Alixsar agrees
*pause again*
[9:36:57p] (@Krel|cooking) Yes. Maybe opening the windows isn't such a good idea.
[9:37:06p] (@Krel|cooking) *just got a call from his neighbor asking what the fuck was going on*
[9:37:17p] (@Krel|cooking) No, no, I didn't light the apartment on fire, I'm just making meatballs.
*another pause*
[9:39:12p] (@Krel|cooking) These had better be fucking delicious.
[9:39:52p] (@Krel|cooking) They were still burninating, so I added a few tablespoons of vegetable oil.
[9:40:07p] [Alixsar] ...
[9:40:12p] (@Krel|cooking) Now I can't approach within 3 feet of the pan without getting scalded, but at least the smoke has died down a bit.
[9:40:15p] [Kamui] Adding a flamable material to fire will solve all problems.
[9:40:15p] (@Krel|cooking) ... a bit.
[9:40:28p] [@Ally] ...
[9:40:28p] [Alixsar] Krel.
[9:40:29p] [Alixsar] Just stop.
[9:40:31p] (@Krel|cooking) No, vegetable oil. You're supposed to add it to things when they start burninating.
[9:40:33p] [@Ally] Yes. Please stop.
[9:40:37p] [Alixsar] Please, you're going to burn down your apartment.
[9:40:40p] [@Ally] I'm afraid you're going to kill yourself.
[9:40:43p] [Kamui] You're going to kill everybody in that building.
[9:40:48p] (@Krel|cooking) no I'm not I r good cook ;_;
[9:40:49p] [Doomgaze] Just go get a Swanson Meal Of Death.. it'll be safer.
[9:40:52p] [Alixsar] Just give up. Please. You can't cook. I'm sorry but stop.
*another pause* I'm making pathetic attempts at cooking during these pauses, mind you.
[9:46:50p] [Alixsar] I'm just waiting for him to come back and say "Well, there was a lot of smoke so I put some lighter fluid in"
[9:47:07p] [Alixsar] "It stopped the smoke, but now my clothes are on fire"
[9:47:28p] [Kamui] Well, Krel could still be rolling on he ground.
[9:49:16p] (@Krel|cooking) Well, all in all, I think that went pretty well.
[9:49:34p] [Kamui] Krel, never again.
[9:49:35p] (@Krel|cooking) Meatballs are supposed to be black, right? I forget, it's been a while since I've eaten them.
[9:49:44p] [Alixsar] Krel. Stop.
[9:49:48p] * Alixsar shakes his head
[9:49:52p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) No, all heat sources are off now.
[9:49:57p] [+Ugtroll] krel, never cook agian
[9:49:57p] [@Ally] Okay, Krel.
[9:50:00p] [Kamui] They are supposed to be a goldeny brownish color.
[9:50:03p] [Alixsar] You're going to EAT that?
[9:50:20p] [@Ally] You might want to make sure that's...edible...
[9:50:23p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Mission accomplished.
[9:51:11p] [Alixsar] Krel. Stick to ramen.
[9:51:14p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Alrighty. *bites down*
[9:51:52p] [Doomgaze] *Krel has died*
[9:51:55p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Hey, these are pretty good.
[9:52:04p] [Alixsar] ...
[9:52:07p] [Kamui] ...
[9:52:07p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Which is a good thing, because I cooked 32 of them.
[9:52:17p] [+Ugtroll] xD
[9:52:24p] [Alixsar] 32?
[9:52:31p] [Kamui] What the hell, Krel? What the hell were you thinking?
[9:52:32p] [Alixsar] Holy fuck.
[9:52:50p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) What? I'm trying to gain weight, not lose weight.
[9:54:09p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) mmm. These are REALLY good.
[9:54:15p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) ...crunchy.
[9:54:17p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) But good!
[9:54:17p] [Alixsar] Yep.
[9:54:26p] [Kamui] If you drop dead, don't say I didn't warn you.
[9:54:31p] [Alixsar] Meatballs aren't supposed to be crunchy.
[9:54:43p] [Doomgaze] That's like saying your Kraft Dinner is pretty good. But Crunchy.
[9:54:44p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) They aren't?
[9:54:51p] [Doomgaze] We're talking about the same amount of skill, here.
[9:54:55p] [Alixsar] No.
[9:55:06p] [Kamui] They are supposed to be soft and good, never crunchy.
[9:55:20p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Well what else is supposed to happen when they get blackened on the outside?
[9:55:26p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Like, completely blackened?
[9:55:33p] [Doomgaze] DON'T COOK THEM ON HIGH WITH PLASTIC SPOONS
[9:55:47p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) I'll keep that in mind next time I cook.
[9:55:59p] [@Ally] Do you think the crunchiness could be the other half of that spoon?
[9:56:08p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) Possibly.
[9:56:21p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) I think most of it melded to the pan, though.
[9:56:24p] (@Krel|eatingHisCooking) So all's well.