sunday was dramatic, and then there is everything else.
sunday was...long.
caused all sorts of drama.
i chilled with cassie (ex girlfriend who i havent seen in FOREVER), matt/uno, and jason. basicly, i drank hella wine, then hella captain morgans. a lot of...crazy stuff happened at uno's house, stuff that i dont completely remember for myself, as well as a few things i remember from before i passed out. apparently, i passed out several times while i was with those three, and also threw up a LOT. when they were trying to get me home, i passed out again, so cassie called zac to find out where i lived, and somehow, zac ended up taking me home. (i dont remember about 4 hours of sunday night...which...freaks me out.) zac says i passed out like, 8 more times in his car, and he took pictures of me sitting on the car seat passed out drunk, and that i said a couple of things i normally wouldnt let myself say. you know...FEELINGS. ohhh man, that sucks. i dont talk feelings. i make sure i dont. so...it unnerves (sp?) me to know that i said some of things i said. i dunno, it's just...*shudders* i hate when im that drunk. i haaaaate it.
sooo...then i came home an hour late (i sat on my driveway puking for a hour), stayed up till 2:30 a.m. throwing up in front of my family (oh, they knew i was drunk. there was no hiding it)...which is when they decided to ask me all sorts of questions. im in trouble. not TOOOO much trouble...
my mom is just upset cause i lied to her and told her i wasnt doing anything like smoking or drinking, and cause i told her i've been taking my medicine. i cant go out for a weekend or two, but next weekend people can come over, and just...yeah. i have to "rebuild their trust"...even though my dad is completely calm about everything, and beleives me when i tell him that im going to chill out and be better now (and i DO mean it).
i dunno.
im writing this all out just because...i needed to get it out when i wanted to tell the story, not when someone else did, and...because...i dunno. there is a lot behind everything i said, stuff that i needed to get out all with my own steam. im stressed, not about sunday or any of that...but...just...ugh. im stressed.
i thought the story might be interesting.
it's a long story, you DONT have to read it...i just needed to spew out all those thoughts, all of that story.
(except that it's not all on there...because...censoring is important...)
saturday matters too...i just dont have the effort to type it all out. a lot matters right now, oh maaan i am figuring things out and making choices that actually matter. damn that sucks.