[sunday_reveries] It's midnight again...
(Cora is penthouselawyer and used as always with love. He's just been kinda lonely lately and this came of it. Plus I've been watching his canon and it's making him think. A lot.)
"i have the scars to prove
the clock strikes
with her hands"
--Saul Williams
Larry sat up in the bed and looked over his shoulder at Cora. She was sleeping soundly, but he hadn't been able to fall asleep. It was a warm night and the sheet they were laying under was bunched up around her waist. He leaned in and ran his fingers down her arm and her side slowly. She sighed softly and curled closer to him. He kissed her shoulder lightly, then leaned against his arm to just watch her.
He touched a curl that was draped against her neck. He closed his eyes and pictured in his mind a moment that he had been replaying so many times over the months. It was actually two moments split into one, but they were layered together so smoothly that they felt like one.
He was stepping towards her in the elevator, and their eyes were locked, and everything seemed to align itself as he moved in and kissed her. Then she was wrapped around him and her breath was in his ear, ”I'm yours.”
“Mmph, Larry,” she muttered. Her hand came up to his to push it off and she rolled onto her other side, her back to him. He sighed and closed his eyes, dropping his head to the pillow beside her.
No matter how many times he replayed that in his head, it was always the same. Just as it had played out. She had said the words, but only after he'd asked her to. At the time it had meant everything to him. No, it still meant a lot to him. He knew that whether prompted or not she had meant it. He knew she cared about him. He knew things were different this time around, and he knew what they had.
He knew. He didn't have to wonder anymore, he didn't have to be scared of the truth, because he knew.
But there was something to say about knowing it verses hearing it. It took the better part of a decade just to feel loved again, but he missed hearing it. When he was younger he was a big proponent of not speaking if it didn't need to be said. He didn't think there was a need to share every waking thought. And then he got older and life started to hurt more, and there were things that he needed. Things that he needed to hear to know, because he doubted everything so much. At the end of the day he knew that he served a part in where he and Cora had gone wrong all those years ago. He hadn't known, and he couldn't continue not knowing. And when he did know....he had wished he hadn't.
He didn't doubt everything as much as he used to anymore. Maybe it was because he was more sure of things; of his life, of himself. Maybe it was because the one thing he was scared of not having he finally had.
He was happy. He was content. He loved the woman beside him, and he knew deep down, in her own way, she loved him too. He knew.
But he missed hearing it desperately. He missed having someone who couldn't stop letting him know. He missed having someone who couldn't stop being close, or touching him. Someone who couldn't stop looking into his eyes.
She rolled over again, this time towards him, and curled up against him. He sighed deeply and moved his arm around her, pulling her in close. She let out a content sigh and he kissed her forehead.
He missed being with a woman who wasn't afraid to love him.
603
"i have the scars to prove
the clock strikes
with her hands"
--Saul Williams
Larry sat up in the bed and looked over his shoulder at Cora. She was sleeping soundly, but he hadn't been able to fall asleep. It was a warm night and the sheet they were laying under was bunched up around her waist. He leaned in and ran his fingers down her arm and her side slowly. She sighed softly and curled closer to him. He kissed her shoulder lightly, then leaned against his arm to just watch her.
He touched a curl that was draped against her neck. He closed his eyes and pictured in his mind a moment that he had been replaying so many times over the months. It was actually two moments split into one, but they were layered together so smoothly that they felt like one.
He was stepping towards her in the elevator, and their eyes were locked, and everything seemed to align itself as he moved in and kissed her. Then she was wrapped around him and her breath was in his ear, ”I'm yours.”
“Mmph, Larry,” she muttered. Her hand came up to his to push it off and she rolled onto her other side, her back to him. He sighed and closed his eyes, dropping his head to the pillow beside her.
No matter how many times he replayed that in his head, it was always the same. Just as it had played out. She had said the words, but only after he'd asked her to. At the time it had meant everything to him. No, it still meant a lot to him. He knew that whether prompted or not she had meant it. He knew she cared about him. He knew things were different this time around, and he knew what they had.
He knew. He didn't have to wonder anymore, he didn't have to be scared of the truth, because he knew.
But there was something to say about knowing it verses hearing it. It took the better part of a decade just to feel loved again, but he missed hearing it. When he was younger he was a big proponent of not speaking if it didn't need to be said. He didn't think there was a need to share every waking thought. And then he got older and life started to hurt more, and there were things that he needed. Things that he needed to hear to know, because he doubted everything so much. At the end of the day he knew that he served a part in where he and Cora had gone wrong all those years ago. He hadn't known, and he couldn't continue not knowing. And when he did know....he had wished he hadn't.
He didn't doubt everything as much as he used to anymore. Maybe it was because he was more sure of things; of his life, of himself. Maybe it was because the one thing he was scared of not having he finally had.
He was happy. He was content. He loved the woman beside him, and he knew deep down, in her own way, she loved him too. He knew.
But he missed hearing it desperately. He missed having someone who couldn't stop letting him know. He missed having someone who couldn't stop being close, or touching him. Someone who couldn't stop looking into his eyes.
She rolled over again, this time towards him, and curled up against him. He sighed deeply and moved his arm around her, pulling her in close. She let out a content sigh and he kissed her forehead.
He missed being with a woman who wasn't afraid to love him.
603