Discussion is good. Isn't it?

[learnedhand_dj]

I consider myself to be a moderate, politically. True-believers on both the left and the right tend to annoy me, mostly because of their tendency to dismiss contrary opinions rather than defend their own. The reason for my annoyance today is the unwillingness of someone on my FL to discuss a position he's taken on his blog. Rather than respond, he'

Comments

[lwbush]

I always expect to be disagreed with, and prepare for it, if my opinion is one I know is not of the mainstream. It's always surprised me when people don't vehemently disagree with me. Expecting it, I would of course leave it up there. I only speak on such subjects if I just can't bring myself to keep quiet any longer, anyway.

Usually I just suck up opinions I know people won't agree with though - who am I going to convince? Probably no one who feels strongly otherwise...

[learnedhand_dj]

Thanks for replying.

The deletion of my first comment surprised me, so my second comment was asking him why he bothered to post his opinion if he didn't want to discuss it. That one was deleted, too.

I guess it just means that different people use their LJs for different things. I view my LJ as being like holding a press conference: I make a statement, then if people want they ask questions or provide comments, and we get into a limited back-and-forth if need be. He obviously viewed his post as a speech, after which he was taking no questions.

[a2zmom]

I'd respond in a (hopefully) thoughtful manner. A few months back I wrote about partial birth abortion, what is really is and when it is used. A few people disagreed, I pointed out the errors of their thinking.

A minor hijack to thank you again for that post...

[liz_marcs]

As someone who actually agreed with you in that post, I still want to say thank you for stating what should have been the blindingly obvious, were it not for the deceptive use of the the misleading phrase "partial birth abortion." I swear that has caused so much harm...

Do you realize that it took me several years for me to explain what "partial birth abortion" actually was to my mother? Do you know what finally changed her mind on the issue and made her realize that she'd been had? I printed out that post you wrote and handed it to her.

So thank you again for that post.

Re: A minor hijack to thank you again for that post...

[a2zmom]

Thank you so much!

It's a real hot button issue for me. Watching my s-i-l making the wrenching decision to abort a much wanted child and then have to be induced - it's been over two years and she's still not over it.

I will never understand those who think people do this lightly. And I understand even less those who think that you and your child should suffer forever because of severely faulty genetics.

[learnedhand_dj]

Thanks for your reply.

My first reply was a somewhat terse disagreement (I basically said his opinion was nonsense), but really, I was just trying to get him to defend his (to me) outlandish position. After the first reply was deleted, my second reply asked why he bothered to post if he didn't want to discuss the issue. That one was deleted as well.

It just seemed strange to me that someone would bother to post an opinion, and then have no interest in discussing it further.

[liz_marcs]

*blink*

Sounds like you ran into a buzzsaw.

Ummmm, you know I leave comments up that I disagree with. Sometimes I respond, sometimes I don't. (Depends on how much time I have in RL more than anything else).

The only comments I've ever deleted in my LJ were spam comments, soooooo...that pretty much tells you something right there. The only comments I've ever screened were from someone I vaguely knew in RL who stumbled on my LJ and then used my full name (my full real name) in an effort to "out" me. They've been banned from commenting, but they still "stalk" my LJ.

Personally, I think that as long as people are reasonably polite it's chickenshit to delete/screen comments that you disagree with. If you make a public post that any monkey like me can read, expect there will be drive-by disagreements with a possibility for flames.

If you want to cut down on the potential for abuse, disallow anonymous commenting (which I had to do because of both spam and flaming), but if someone's sticking their name on their response whether it

[learnedhand_dj]

Thanks for answering.

The post in question stated that because Obama was elected president, the enemies of our nation were rejoicing. I guess it's a matter of opinion as to whether that statement was egregious enough to require a response. Personally, I didn't think I could let that pass without a reply.

I didn't bother with facts and figures and studies and whatnot about how wrong the opinion was, I just gave him an intro sentence and then one word: "Nonsense." That got deleted. Then I posted another comment, asking why he bothered to put up his original post if he wasn't looking to get into a discussion about it. That got deleted, too.

It was the second deletion that got me thinking that maybe I was starting with an incorrect presumption, that people post things in their blog because they want to talk about the topic. He obviously didn't. I wasn't thinking I'd be able to change his mind, but I at least wanted to engage him a little and find out what basis (if any) he had for his opinion. I guess I'll have to live without knowing.

[bastardsnow]

I am aware of the person to whom you refer, and while I am disappointed, my honest opinion is that said person is well within their rights (not that I thought you were saying otherwise).

Personally, when I post political stuff, I'm mostly just saying stuff I feel like saying, though I'm almost always interested in hearing other peoples' opinions as well. I enjoy a good discussion.

I don't believe I've ever deleted a comment because it disagreed with me or my positions, because, while I know that my LJ is not regulated by the first amendment, I am a huge proponent of free speech. I try to make it my personal policy not to shut people up just because they have the temerity not to agree with me.

I would also try to respond in a reasoned and honest fashion, but if I didn't think I could do that, I'd either ignore it (while leaving it up) or, potentially, make a joke.

[learnedhand_dj]

Thanks for your answer

[bastardsnow]

I definitely agree. I think that for the most part his posts do tend to be more like speeches than press conferences. I do know of at least one person who has defriended him over his treatment of people in that post.

I think he definitely comes from the Conservative Christian side of the spectrum, which is so amazingly far from my experience that I often can't even comprehend the mindset necessary for the arguments, to be honest.

In any event, most of the time when I do engage with him, he's at the least polite. I'm guessing he's just so upset over the result (because I believe he honestly does want what's best for the country, just has a completely different view of what 'best' is) that he probably felt he couldn't respond civilly.

[learnedhand_dj]

I think you're probably right. Being a moderate, it's easy for me to forget how the folks out on the wings react when things don't go their way. Because their view of the world depends so much on the belief their opinions are correct, when a majority of the country tells them they are wrong, it has to hurt. A lot.

I think its understandable that I wouldn't think of the right-wings hurt feelings. The elections were so close and fraught with irregularities in 2000 and 2004, I think that the left-wing didn't really feel rejection, but instead cried fraud. In 1992 and 1996, the right-wing could comfort themselves with the fact that Clinton didn't get a majority. So, really, we haven't had an election where one of the wings would have a reason to feel significant rejection since 1988. I guess I've just gotten used to the losing side seeking comfort in the knowledge the other side didn't really represent the majority of the country, rather than having reason to feel hurt by the country's rejection.

[m_mcgregor]

Here's what I do when people disagree with me

[learnedhand_dj]

Thanks for your comment