Oh yeah, the internet.
Now with 80% less whining!
Funny, I get a girlfriend and a social life, and I drop offline completely.
Where do I start. I'm dating this girl named Alisa. It's officially serious at this point. Matt is coming up next weekend to meet her, and I'm dragging her along next week when I run down to my parents place to get more of my stuff out of their garage. She's meeting my parents. I've also invited her to an anime convention at the end of the semester. We'll be sharing a hotel room, with Matt. Hopefully that will work out.
At my lowest points, I doubted my own sexuality, either orientation or it's existence at all. I...uh...don't anymore. I'm not sure clarification is possible without being crass, or even necessary. We've taken to spending as much time as is physically possible with each other...after work, after school, sacrificing sleep. I'm not sure how many nights we've stayed up until 3AM now. And it's not enough. I go two days without seeing her and I start getting all self-doubting and lost again.
It all just happened so fast. I'm not even sure how to go from here. We have very similar tastes and outlooks on life. I lend her music, she lends me books. And food. Oh the food. She came over for valentines day and we made a lasagna and watched anime. But it's all been so easy. She was just...there. I didn't have to convince her of anything, I don't have to apologize for my extremely high levels of weird. The more we act like ourselves around the other, the more we end up liking each other. It makes my head spin to think of how off kilter I was back in October. We're both adults in our late 20's, financially secure and apart from my two years of college to go, ready to start our lives. And it's quickly becoming a question of if I want to do so with her.
Back in October, I didn't think I'd even HAVE this option. Hell, I didn't dare dream I'd be so lucky when January rolled around. It's a lot to take in.
So that's distracting.
She introduced me to her gaming group, who immediately informed me that they had an opening in their 4th edition D&D game. We played a few sessions and have since decided to switch campaigns and systems. 4th Edition is...simplistic. It's a hack and slash game, with enough RPG elements thrown in to give it a plausible story. It's pretty sound, mind you, but I like a bit more variety in my games. So we're playing something called Burning Wheel now. We'll see how that goes.
I once again dislike calculus. For a brief two months, it started making sense, and now it's diverted away from answers with concrete numbers to abstract formulas again. I still don't know exactly why I'm being told to take this course, computers do all of this stuff for you now. In fact, I love computers so much BECAUSE they do this for you, and I can focus on the process and not the number crunching and rules. I get why you do it all. How is just too hard for my brain.
Then there's my biology class. Oh boy. First, it's only offered partially online. I'm bad at paying attention to online lectures, that's why I came to a sit-down university. Second, all of the lectures are recorded poorly and delivered poorly. The material jumps between 5th grade level information and "so I'm sure you're all familiar with the first law of thermodynamics", in both the lectures and the lab work. The lab is a series of inane "experiments" and keeping an immaculate laboratory notebook (in pen) with answers "IN COMPLETE SENTENCES". And there's three group project research papers. I was lucky enough to be grouped with a workaholic in the first paper, so we aced that one and now I have a template for a perfect paper. As I understand it, California implemented some sort of "writing proficiency" standard on college graduation, so for my university it's been shoehorned into...the biology 102 class. Not English (which I've already passed with flying A's). Not history, where you listen to lectures and then write research papers on the stuff. Biology. As if we didn't spend two hours a week doing busywork labs. My teacher/class review for this one is going to be legendary.
I'm basically content, for the first time in ...about a decade. I know what I'm doing, where I want to go, and maybe, just maybe, who I want to go there with. It's amazing how the simple act of being hugged on a regular basis has eliminated a good deal of my usual self doubting. I'm all focused, and don't really feel the need to go on about it for pages at a time. If it keeps up, I may just have to give up on updating livejournal.
Funny, I get a girlfriend and a social life, and I drop offline completely.
Where do I start. I'm dating this girl named Alisa. It's officially serious at this point. Matt is coming up next weekend to meet her, and I'm dragging her along next week when I run down to my parents place to get more of my stuff out of their garage. She's meeting my parents. I've also invited her to an anime convention at the end of the semester. We'll be sharing a hotel room, with Matt. Hopefully that will work out.
At my lowest points, I doubted my own sexuality, either orientation or it's existence at all. I...uh...don't anymore. I'm not sure clarification is possible without being crass, or even necessary. We've taken to spending as much time as is physically possible with each other...after work, after school, sacrificing sleep. I'm not sure how many nights we've stayed up until 3AM now. And it's not enough. I go two days without seeing her and I start getting all self-doubting and lost again.
It all just happened so fast. I'm not even sure how to go from here. We have very similar tastes and outlooks on life. I lend her music, she lends me books. And food. Oh the food. She came over for valentines day and we made a lasagna and watched anime. But it's all been so easy. She was just...there. I didn't have to convince her of anything, I don't have to apologize for my extremely high levels of weird. The more we act like ourselves around the other, the more we end up liking each other. It makes my head spin to think of how off kilter I was back in October. We're both adults in our late 20's, financially secure and apart from my two years of college to go, ready to start our lives. And it's quickly becoming a question of if I want to do so with her.
Back in October, I didn't think I'd even HAVE this option. Hell, I didn't dare dream I'd be so lucky when January rolled around. It's a lot to take in.
So that's distracting.
She introduced me to her gaming group, who immediately informed me that they had an opening in their 4th edition D&D game. We played a few sessions and have since decided to switch campaigns and systems. 4th Edition is...simplistic. It's a hack and slash game, with enough RPG elements thrown in to give it a plausible story. It's pretty sound, mind you, but I like a bit more variety in my games. So we're playing something called Burning Wheel now. We'll see how that goes.
I once again dislike calculus. For a brief two months, it started making sense, and now it's diverted away from answers with concrete numbers to abstract formulas again. I still don't know exactly why I'm being told to take this course, computers do all of this stuff for you now. In fact, I love computers so much BECAUSE they do this for you, and I can focus on the process and not the number crunching and rules. I get why you do it all. How is just too hard for my brain.
Then there's my biology class. Oh boy. First, it's only offered partially online. I'm bad at paying attention to online lectures, that's why I came to a sit-down university. Second, all of the lectures are recorded poorly and delivered poorly. The material jumps between 5th grade level information and "so I'm sure you're all familiar with the first law of thermodynamics", in both the lectures and the lab work. The lab is a series of inane "experiments" and keeping an immaculate laboratory notebook (in pen) with answers "IN COMPLETE SENTENCES". And there's three group project research papers. I was lucky enough to be grouped with a workaholic in the first paper, so we aced that one and now I have a template for a perfect paper. As I understand it, California implemented some sort of "writing proficiency" standard on college graduation, so for my university it's been shoehorned into...the biology 102 class. Not English (which I've already passed with flying A's). Not history, where you listen to lectures and then write research papers on the stuff. Biology. As if we didn't spend two hours a week doing busywork labs. My teacher/class review for this one is going to be legendary.
I'm basically content, for the first time in ...about a decade. I know what I'm doing, where I want to go, and maybe, just maybe, who I want to go there with. It's amazing how the simple act of being hugged on a regular basis has eliminated a good deal of my usual self doubting. I'm all focused, and don't really feel the need to go on about it for pages at a time. If it keeps up, I may just have to give up on updating livejournal.