❥002
A Little Too Late
Sooyoung(/Hankyung/Sungmin(/Sunny))/Kyuhyun(/Seohyun) ♫ angst ♫ 1683 words
Realization came too late, and she didn't know whether to cry in happiness that she finally realized or to cry for her cruel life she's been living
"Kyuhyun oppa! Do you know that I've been working very hard for our debut? You have to see me dancing! The song is really catchy and I can't wait any longer! We're going to debut, oh my god! In August! And that's like, less than 4 months!" She happily shared her stories to the guy in front of her. the guy that used to cheer her up when something's wrong, the guy that voluntarily sings her a lullaby with his oh so beautiful voice when she can't sleep...
Her very best friend that is now laying motionless on a hospital bed even weeks after the accident.
Sooyoung visits him everyday, telling him every detail of what happened to her during the day, that Jessica fell asleep again (Kyuhyun oppa! Guess what? Sica fell asleep again for the 100th times since SNSD started practicing! That means I won the bet! You said she wouldn't even reach the number 50. Well, you were wrong! She sleeps EVERYTIME she has the chance! Now promise me you'll give me some money when you wake up, okay!) or that she shared some quality time with Sungmin (oh my god Kyuhyun oppa! I just talked and just hang with Sungmin oppa ALONE. Not that I'm glad that you're not there to tease me or something, but this is an improvement!), and many more.
She would happily tell her stories until she realizes that Kyuhyun is still as silent as ever. He's in a fricken coma, idiot. What do you expect him to say? Sooyoung muttered to herself and started cursing, as if cursing the whole world would rewind all the bad things that happened.
Then she would question god, why on earth is this happening to her, to her best friend. He doesn't deserve this. Yes, he might be a little bit rude, sarcastic and cold to some people but that's just not as equal to what god has given him for punishment. Besides, as far as Sooyoung remembered, Kyuhyun is not a bad person at all. He would tease her at times, but behind all the snarkiness, he's actually nice, caring, and hard working.
In the end, she always went home with red eyes in result of all the tears she produced when she began to remember all the good times she shared with him, and of course, Sungmin and knowing that there's too little chance that everything's going to be normal again....
Even after he wakes up.
♫
Sooyoung was there when Kyuhyun started gaining consciousness again. She was rubbing his hands gently when suddenly, she felt some movement and when she took a glance to his face, his eyes slowly opening.
She smiled earnestly for the first time since the accident with tears of joy forming at the back of her eyes. But she didn't mind at all. She would cry like she never cried before and being seen by her sunbaes or hoobaes. She doesn't care. Kyuhyun wakes up and things are going to get (at least) better...
Kyuhyun opened his mouth and he struggled to get some sound out of him. And when he did, all of Sooyoung's optimist self disappeared into thin air.
Because after she realized what the boy actually said, she thought she was having hearing problems when his first words after waking up from a 2 month coma are
"Who are you?"
And Sooyoung wonders how the hell can 3 words are able to bring her such pain.
♫
Even after weeks, Sooyoung still can't accept the fact that of all the people he knew, herself, his very best friend is the only one that he can't remember. To her horror, the scene when he woke up can't seem to leave her alone. So every night, just like a broken record, the memory will start playing in her head and it goes like this
"Who are you?"
"What do you mean, oppa?" Kyuhyun flinched at the moment her hands touched his. "Kyuhyun ah please, don't joke around. This is serious. Now tell me who I am."
Kyuhyun stares at Sooyoung intensely, as if he's studying her face, and finally, he tilts his head in confusion.
Sooyoung stares him in disbelief.
"Yah. Kyuhyun oppa. please, I'm begging you please, say my name. Please." She's starting to lose it, she thought, and she doesn't care.
"I...I don't know" Kyuhyun started off slowly, and raised his voice when Sooyoung touched him "I DON'T KNOW. STOP TOUCHING ME!"
Startled, Sooyoung stands up and leaves, refuses to turn back to see his condition as she fights the tears from falling.
He doesn't remember me.
The sound of his voice never left her head ever since.
♫
It's already been months since Kyuhyun woke up, and she had been happily playing the role of SNSD's cheerful princess. Well, every time the camera roles, that is.
She continued DJing with her best friend whom she likes more than a best friend should, Lee Sungmin.
All these times, she went to Sungmin for comfort. And there were some moments when she forgets about Kyuhyun, every time he pulls her in his embrace.
But sadly, god doesn't seem to like her at all, when she discovers that Sungmin have been secretly liking sunny way before they became partners and that Sungmin just had to tell her, “I love you, Sooyoung. But I love you as my sister.”
She cried more often after that, even though “I'm sorry”-s are always around when she did.
Weirdly, they didn't make any difference.
♫
Still in the gloomy mood of being rejected, Sooyoung watched all her chunji videos to make her feel better, because Sungmin always cared for me then, because I know that behind all the bickering, he loved me… more than a sister
She stopped when their 100th day anniversary video started.
Kyuhyun called that day.
Of course, how can she forget that moment? She remembers it clearly like it was yesterday. She remembers how ridiculously gay Sungmin acted when Kyuhyun called, she remembers the bickering caused by a simple name, She remembers the teasing, whether it was gas Sooyoung or fart Sooyoung, she remembers when Kyuhyun gave her something about Sungmin to defend herself.....and she remembers their love confession.
"Sooyoung-ssi, saranghae"
"Aaww Kyuhyun ssi saranghaeyo! I love you, you love me, we love each other!"
"I'm fine thank you, and you?"
Sooyoung wonders if he really did mean it.
♫
Sooyoung spent her free days home, when the others used their precious time meeting their family, going on a vacations and other stuff. She would just watch tv lazily on the couch, taking the opportunity to do anything she wants without the other members.
So she flipped through channels and suddenly, a familiar face caught her eyes
It's Kyuhyun.
He's talking about his ideal type.
"So, Kyuhyun ssi, what's your ideal type for a girl?"
"Ermmm..." He thinks hard for a while and continued "I like girls with long legs"
I have long legs...
"I want them to have pretty forehead"
I used to reveal my forehead then...
"I like girls with long hair, although I would still like a girl who looks nice in short hair too"
My hair was long.
"But actually what I really want is a girl who truly cares about me
Do I?
Realization came too late, and she didn't know whether to cry in happiness that she finally realized or to cry for her cruel life she's been living.
♫
"Sooyoung-ssi, do you know that you're close to my ideal type?"
She chuckled and said "really? I thought you like pure, innocent girls?"
"Well, physically, at least"
"YAH!" Sooyoung said as she threw a punch to him.
"Yah! You should respect your sunbae! And don't you dare calling Sungmin here to help you defend yourself"
"Anyway, there's a person who really fits your type you know." Sooyoung sighed. "Have you ever paid enough attention to our magnae?"
"Seohyun ssi?"
"Dugh. She has all the things you liked about girls, and more."
"Wow. I never really paid attention to her.."
"Well, you should start now"
Kyuhyun took a glance at snsd's magnae and smiled. Seohyun, surprised by her sunbae's action blushed and flashed her beautiful smile back. There’s a spark in Kyuhyun’s eyes and it’s so obvious that he’s falling in love, Sooyoung feels like dying a little bit inside.
♫
It hurts her to see how awfully compatible they are to each other, they're both the magnaes of the group, they have their own awkward charms, they sing beautifully, they topped their school and heck, they even have the same blood type.
But she had to do it. His memories are never going to be back, he'll never be able to remember their nights going out to look for foods together, his attempts to hypnotize her all the way to be as addicted to starcraft as he is, all the laughs they shared, so does his feelings to her back then.
Sooyoung mentally slapped herself for bringing back the memories. So she encouraged the magnae to get closer with kyuhyun, and she doesn't stop blabbering about how perfect Seohyun is to Kyuhyun. She no longer cares about how she's hurting inside because she realized that it's her own fault for keeping the pain for too long.
So she turns her head, makes an attempt to stop taking glances at them, and surprisingly, she found one particular boy that caught her attention.
I never realized how gorgeous Hankyung oppa looked in a suit.
♫
Sooyoung knows that the Chinese dancer would never heal her heart (although he filled my stomach) but she believes that it will get better. Because the only way to get her life back, is to let go
And move on.