I still get angry sometimes about what happened to me 20 years ago. It pisses me off, and I'm angry that I didn't tell anyone sooner. I didn't understand what had happened until much later, and even then, I was ashamed and thought that I was to blame.
Don't be so hard on yourself. You just went through something traumatic, and it takes time to get past these things. You will eventually get to a point where you are more comfortable, but it is okay to still be nervous. There may be some setbacks here and there, but things WILL gradually get better. *hugs*
Don't be so hard on yourself; you're not stupid at all. It's okay to be nervous and scared. No one expects you to immediately be back to normal. I'm proud of you for just working up the nerve to go out. I'm not even sure that I could do that if I were in the situation.
I'm going to go with you're not stupid, too. I got triggered for some memories that have kept me up until after dawn for the last couple of weeks, and I can't even say for sure that they're "real". Not stupid.
This might be stupid, though. Have you tried listening to any Ani DiFranco? She's pretty much the closest thing that exists to a wise sage on these matters, I believe, haha. I listened to her album "Dilate" last night and found it really, incredibly helpful. "Living in Clip" is a good choice too.
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Don't be so hard on yourself. You just went through something traumatic, and it takes time to get past these things. You will eventually get to a point where you are more comfortable, but it is okay to still be nervous. There may be some setbacks here and there, but things WILL gradually get better. *hugs*
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This might be stupid, though. Have you tried listening to any Ani DiFranco? She's pretty much the closest thing that exists to a wise sage on these matters, I believe, haha. I listened to her album "Dilate" last night and found it really, incredibly helpful. "Living in Clip" is a good choice too.
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