(no subject)
One of the biggest frustrations I have with my life right now is that I have no close-knit circle of friends. Most are all all separate, isolated points in space having very little or nothing to do with each other. Even if I had the opportunity to have them all meet each other at a gathering, I couldn't really see some of them getting along or having anything in common.
And the strange thing is, about that, is that I am very choosy with the people I call friends. If I'm going to hang out with someone on a regular basis, they are to be of x intelligence and x sociability and so forth. So that leads to the logical if a is equal to b and b is equal to c than a is equal to c conclusion that all or most of them should get along. Which I am certain they would on some level, but I find it doubtful that (and I won't name any names) that friend a would have fun doing the things that friend b likes doing and vice versa and so on. The wide personality range that my friends occupy, from hermits to hippies to professional muslim chefs, reflects back on me in one of three ways:
A) my friends are not all as perfect as I would like them to be, because either:
-I am poor at choosing friends
or
-I am very good at choosing friends but the population sample available to me is just so lousy that it's not my fault, but society's
or
B) I transcend these sociological barriers, and can have any friends I want in any way in any capacity, and will appreciate every one at identical levels for what they are
or
C) Something in between the above two, which I am too tired to try and articulate right now
The exception was a couple weeks ago when Elizabeth and I ran into Courtney and Lindsay at the Grog Shop. They hit it off pretty well and talked it up for awhile, and plan to hang out in the future off on their own without me to relate through. It was the first instance of a successful collision of worlds. It felt really really strange to see that happen for the first time, though I'm happy it did. As I can now have opportunities in the future to hang out with all of them at once, killing two birds with one stone.
But yeah, other than that, it's a strain on my schedule. It's like, I used to have a close knit circle of friends in high school and shortly thereafter, and now with all the people I've met and clicked with since then, it's like having what could have hypothetically been a close knit circle of friends who all went to separate jails in different counties. So now I have to set aside time to go and visit each one on a given date, instead of all of us being friends and knowing each other and having huge gay ass bar-b-ques in the metroparks or whatever.
Stranger still, when it comes down to it I suppose I'm pretty comfortable with my situation. Besides, close knit circles of friends are, as is their sociological nature, much more likely to foment unnecessary drama.
AND
unrelatedly,
It bothered me today that the handsome African-American couple who came into the restaurant (the middleburg one, which does have a mostly white clientele) stiffed me on the tip, despite receiving (what I thought was) very above-average service. It would be one thing if the opportunity was open for it being a mistake, but it wasn't, as they paid by credit card and marked a big ZERO on the tip line on the receipt and left nothing else on the table. Fortunately for them, even though I am a white guy, I am not a stupid white guy. I believe that in some capacity that it's events like these that just put fuel on the racism fire, turning stupid white guys into racist white guys.
It really aggravated me, the thought that they may have not tipped me because they were racist. I would have completely let it go if beforehand they came up to me and said "I'm sorry David, the service was superb but we won't be tipping you tonight. You know, reparations for black slavery." I would have, really.
And the strange thing is, about that, is that I am very choosy with the people I call friends. If I'm going to hang out with someone on a regular basis, they are to be of x intelligence and x sociability and so forth. So that leads to the logical if a is equal to b and b is equal to c than a is equal to c conclusion that all or most of them should get along. Which I am certain they would on some level, but I find it doubtful that (and I won't name any names) that friend a would have fun doing the things that friend b likes doing and vice versa and so on. The wide personality range that my friends occupy, from hermits to hippies to professional muslim chefs, reflects back on me in one of three ways:
A) my friends are not all as perfect as I would like them to be, because either:
-I am poor at choosing friends
or
-I am very good at choosing friends but the population sample available to me is just so lousy that it's not my fault, but society's
or
B) I transcend these sociological barriers, and can have any friends I want in any way in any capacity, and will appreciate every one at identical levels for what they are
or
C) Something in between the above two, which I am too tired to try and articulate right now
The exception was a couple weeks ago when Elizabeth and I ran into Courtney and Lindsay at the Grog Shop. They hit it off pretty well and talked it up for awhile, and plan to hang out in the future off on their own without me to relate through. It was the first instance of a successful collision of worlds. It felt really really strange to see that happen for the first time, though I'm happy it did. As I can now have opportunities in the future to hang out with all of them at once, killing two birds with one stone.
But yeah, other than that, it's a strain on my schedule. It's like, I used to have a close knit circle of friends in high school and shortly thereafter, and now with all the people I've met and clicked with since then, it's like having what could have hypothetically been a close knit circle of friends who all went to separate jails in different counties. So now I have to set aside time to go and visit each one on a given date, instead of all of us being friends and knowing each other and having huge gay ass bar-b-ques in the metroparks or whatever.
Stranger still, when it comes down to it I suppose I'm pretty comfortable with my situation. Besides, close knit circles of friends are, as is their sociological nature, much more likely to foment unnecessary drama.
AND
unrelatedly,
It bothered me today that the handsome African-American couple who came into the restaurant (the middleburg one, which does have a mostly white clientele) stiffed me on the tip, despite receiving (what I thought was) very above-average service. It would be one thing if the opportunity was open for it being a mistake, but it wasn't, as they paid by credit card and marked a big ZERO on the tip line on the receipt and left nothing else on the table. Fortunately for them, even though I am a white guy, I am not a stupid white guy. I believe that in some capacity that it's events like these that just put fuel on the racism fire, turning stupid white guys into racist white guys.
It really aggravated me, the thought that they may have not tipped me because they were racist. I would have completely let it go if beforehand they came up to me and said "I'm sorry David, the service was superb but we won't be tipping you tonight. You know, reparations for black slavery." I would have, really.