Orbit {Hankyung/Kyuhyun}
Pairing: Hankyung/Kyuhyun, sort of some Sungmin/Kyuhyun
Rating: pg-13
Summary: You miss me sometimes.
Note: in my defense, i needed to write something for the fact that kyuhanism is officially open for business ^_^" & i'm sorry it's kind of angsty…the inspiration i got was heartachey :|
Word count: ~1230
Orbit
It’s twelve minutes past two in the morning, and Hankyung wakes up to the sound of Kyuhyun getting out of bed, the springs making this subtle squeak. And Kyuhyun’s nose must be wet or something, because Hankyung hears a sniff.
He doesn’t leave, though, just stands in the center of the room. In the dark, Hankyung can see long fingers fidgeting with the hem of a t-shirt. Kyuhyun leaves his motions to just this, and the occasional removal of his hand from his shirt to wipe at his eyes. Hankyung starts to panic, starts to sit up. “What’s wrong?”
Kyuhyun whirls around. “I’m in pain.”
“Where does it hurt?” Hankyung twists his own shirt back into its normal place, it’s wrinkled from sleep.
“Someplace hidden,” he answers. “You…”
“What?”
“You miss me sometimes. I know you do,” says Kyuhyun. “But it’s thinking about what-no-it’s when I wonder if you don’t miss me that I start to feel like this.”
Hankyung doesn’t say anything, just stares, and Kyuhyun thinks that this is ridiculous and shit, he doesn’t care and thinks about throwing it all out the window, the past however many years, and storming out the door. Storming past the fans’ gifts and blue walls and pictures and everything in this house that screams the future and past at the same time.
And then there’s the present. Well, in the present, Hankyung has his arms around Kyuhyun. “Let’s go somewhere,” says the Chinese man.
“Where?” Kyuhyun cries into his shoulder. He’s given in easily, and Hankyung hasn’t said anything about what matters most. Hankyung pulls away and settles his warm hands on Kyuhyun’s shoulders.
“I’ve got two bikes. We’re going for a ride.”
“Well, it’s actually Lele’s bike-Sunle,” Hankyung says, tying a flashlight to the handlebars. He left it here last week but hasn’t come back for it yet.”
Kyuhyun wants to ask him You have missed me, right? but what comes out instead is, “He won’t mind, will he?”
“Of course not,” Hankyung smiles, lighting up the underside of his face with another flashlight. “Come on, follow me.”
Kyuhyun follows, like a good dongsaeng, and he hasn’t been on a bicycle for a while, but like the saying tells you: once you learn, you never forget. And he’s pretty sure there are other things you could apply the theory to. One of them is Hankyung.
They go down a dim alley, lit only by their flashlights and the end light from a streetlamp on the other side. Kyuhyun thinks that he could stay this way forever, following Hankyung around in China. They could both melt into their real selves: Han Geng and Kuixian. Kyuhyun’s always been more partial to his persona as Kuixian anyway.
This could be it for him. If only he didn’t have a life to return to. A shining career as the maknae of the mega boy band, although dwindled down at this point, Super Junior. An amazing vocalist that could very well go solo if he wanted. Then again, Kyuhyun doesn’t want to.
He tries to think about other things. He doesn’t have to fret over the Kyuhyun persona. Not now.
There’s hardly anyone around in the neighborhood. Hankyung turns his head to make sure Kyuhyun’s still behind him, and it’s not like Kyuhyun would ever have the heart to abandon him. But uncertainty has been gripping Kyuhyun ever since the proclamation of You miss me sometimes. I know you do.
Hankyung shivers. Kyuhyun’s always been good at reading him.
It’s almost four in the morning when they stop. Kyuhyun doesn’t feel like they’ll ever reach the city again. Where are they?
“Do you get lonely?” Hankyung asks, and it’s so sudden that Kyuhyun almost falls over. He’s got a good grip on Sunle’s bike though-they’re walking now.
Still, he answers. “I do.”
Hankyung is quiet again. For the first time in a while, Kyuhyun wants to hit him, shake him, or something. Stop shutting your mouth when I open myself up to you, it’s annoying, and it makes me feel like shit.
“Here.”
He puts the kickstand down on the bike, just like Hankyung’s done. Just like hyung. And he follows him the rest of the way, stepping on pebbles and the occasional clump of grass. They don’t go that far into a thick cluster of trees, and it’s not that thick anyway as it opens into a small clearing. Hankyung has his flashlight in his left hand.
There’s a well in front of him. It’s wide, but not too wide, and as Kyuhyun comes closer, his mind flashes him the image of hyung falling, tumbling down through that probably damp passage and if he did, he would probably shatter at the bottom.
He grabs Hankyung’s shoulder, but the older man chuckles a bit when Kyuhyun pulls him back a foot or two. “It’s okay, Kuixian-oh, I mean…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-”
“No, don’t be, hyung-ge-I missed it. Kuixian.”
“Oh. Really?”
“I did.”
Hankyung sighs and Kyuhyun’s eyes widen when he feels their hands mesh together, Hankyung holding on as tight as he can without causing discomfort.
“I come here,” Hankyung says slowly, in Mandarin, slow enough so Kyuhyun can perhaps understand, “when I want to wish for something. When I’m lonely.”
Kyuhyun waits for him to go on. They take a few steps closer.
“My little cousin showed me this place a few years before I left for Korea.”
He marvels in his hyung’s increased eloquence in Chinese, but keeps his thoughts to himself, squeezing Hankyung’s hand instead.
“Before you-and everyone else-came to China, I wished that I could see you again. And then I did,” he sighs. “But you’re wrong, Kuixian. I don’t miss you sometimes. I miss you more than sometimes.”
And then it’s Kyuhyun’s turn to be silent, to take in the words and even though there aren’t too many of them, and the language expressed is not his native, not the one he’s comfortable in, he waits and processes everything. Their dark eyes stay connected the whole time, not bothering to swim around in their sockets for other subjects to look at when they have each other.
“It’s not possible for us to always be together, though.”
Kyuhyun lowers his eyes first, the ground is dark enough to be a black hole itself. Sort of, at least.
“I know. But it’d be nice.”
“Someday we’ll almost make it.”
“Don’t cry again, please,” he begs. Hankyung rubs his thumb along Kyuhyun’s knuckles.
“No promises.”
Hankyung gives a short pause, bottom lip squished between his teeth. “Just don’t cry by yourself.”
By the time they get back, and Kyuhyun is laced with a light sheen of sweat from pedaling so much, the sun is peeking at them. They’ve barely slept.
“They said you’d need to be back at seven.”
Sigh. “Yeah.”
“Might want to get your things, then.”
“I will.”
“Kuixian.”
“Hm?”
“I’ll miss you.”
“More than sometimes.”
Kyuhyun meets Sungmin outside the airport. Sungmin doesn’t say much to him, and Kyuhyun doesn’t say much in return for his silence. But their eyes say enough, and Sungmin brings Kyuhyun through the automatic doors, into the arms of his hyungs. Kyuhyun holds Sungmin’s hand underneath a scratchy airplane blanket on the flight home, but he easily forgets that it’s not Hankyung’s.
It’s easy to forget things that aren’t Hankyung’s.
--
the scene with the well is partially inspired by one of the first scenes in Haruki Murakami's Norwegian Wood, where Naoko tells Toru about the well.
Rating: pg-13
Summary: You miss me sometimes.
Note: in my defense, i needed to write something for the fact that kyuhanism is officially open for business ^_^" & i'm sorry it's kind of angsty…the inspiration i got was heartachey :|
Word count: ~1230
Orbit
It’s twelve minutes past two in the morning, and Hankyung wakes up to the sound of Kyuhyun getting out of bed, the springs making this subtle squeak. And Kyuhyun’s nose must be wet or something, because Hankyung hears a sniff.
He doesn’t leave, though, just stands in the center of the room. In the dark, Hankyung can see long fingers fidgeting with the hem of a t-shirt. Kyuhyun leaves his motions to just this, and the occasional removal of his hand from his shirt to wipe at his eyes. Hankyung starts to panic, starts to sit up. “What’s wrong?”
Kyuhyun whirls around. “I’m in pain.”
“Where does it hurt?” Hankyung twists his own shirt back into its normal place, it’s wrinkled from sleep.
“Someplace hidden,” he answers. “You…”
“What?”
“You miss me sometimes. I know you do,” says Kyuhyun. “But it’s thinking about what-no-it’s when I wonder if you don’t miss me that I start to feel like this.”
Hankyung doesn’t say anything, just stares, and Kyuhyun thinks that this is ridiculous and shit, he doesn’t care and thinks about throwing it all out the window, the past however many years, and storming out the door. Storming past the fans’ gifts and blue walls and pictures and everything in this house that screams the future and past at the same time.
And then there’s the present. Well, in the present, Hankyung has his arms around Kyuhyun. “Let’s go somewhere,” says the Chinese man.
“Where?” Kyuhyun cries into his shoulder. He’s given in easily, and Hankyung hasn’t said anything about what matters most. Hankyung pulls away and settles his warm hands on Kyuhyun’s shoulders.
“I’ve got two bikes. We’re going for a ride.”
“Well, it’s actually Lele’s bike-Sunle,” Hankyung says, tying a flashlight to the handlebars. He left it here last week but hasn’t come back for it yet.”
Kyuhyun wants to ask him You have missed me, right? but what comes out instead is, “He won’t mind, will he?”
“Of course not,” Hankyung smiles, lighting up the underside of his face with another flashlight. “Come on, follow me.”
Kyuhyun follows, like a good dongsaeng, and he hasn’t been on a bicycle for a while, but like the saying tells you: once you learn, you never forget. And he’s pretty sure there are other things you could apply the theory to. One of them is Hankyung.
They go down a dim alley, lit only by their flashlights and the end light from a streetlamp on the other side. Kyuhyun thinks that he could stay this way forever, following Hankyung around in China. They could both melt into their real selves: Han Geng and Kuixian. Kyuhyun’s always been more partial to his persona as Kuixian anyway.
This could be it for him. If only he didn’t have a life to return to. A shining career as the maknae of the mega boy band, although dwindled down at this point, Super Junior. An amazing vocalist that could very well go solo if he wanted. Then again, Kyuhyun doesn’t want to.
He tries to think about other things. He doesn’t have to fret over the Kyuhyun persona. Not now.
There’s hardly anyone around in the neighborhood. Hankyung turns his head to make sure Kyuhyun’s still behind him, and it’s not like Kyuhyun would ever have the heart to abandon him. But uncertainty has been gripping Kyuhyun ever since the proclamation of You miss me sometimes. I know you do.
Hankyung shivers. Kyuhyun’s always been good at reading him.
It’s almost four in the morning when they stop. Kyuhyun doesn’t feel like they’ll ever reach the city again. Where are they?
“Do you get lonely?” Hankyung asks, and it’s so sudden that Kyuhyun almost falls over. He’s got a good grip on Sunle’s bike though-they’re walking now.
Still, he answers. “I do.”
Hankyung is quiet again. For the first time in a while, Kyuhyun wants to hit him, shake him, or something. Stop shutting your mouth when I open myself up to you, it’s annoying, and it makes me feel like shit.
“Here.”
He puts the kickstand down on the bike, just like Hankyung’s done. Just like hyung. And he follows him the rest of the way, stepping on pebbles and the occasional clump of grass. They don’t go that far into a thick cluster of trees, and it’s not that thick anyway as it opens into a small clearing. Hankyung has his flashlight in his left hand.
There’s a well in front of him. It’s wide, but not too wide, and as Kyuhyun comes closer, his mind flashes him the image of hyung falling, tumbling down through that probably damp passage and if he did, he would probably shatter at the bottom.
He grabs Hankyung’s shoulder, but the older man chuckles a bit when Kyuhyun pulls him back a foot or two. “It’s okay, Kuixian-oh, I mean…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-”
“No, don’t be, hyung-ge-I missed it. Kuixian.”
“Oh. Really?”
“I did.”
Hankyung sighs and Kyuhyun’s eyes widen when he feels their hands mesh together, Hankyung holding on as tight as he can without causing discomfort.
“I come here,” Hankyung says slowly, in Mandarin, slow enough so Kyuhyun can perhaps understand, “when I want to wish for something. When I’m lonely.”
Kyuhyun waits for him to go on. They take a few steps closer.
“My little cousin showed me this place a few years before I left for Korea.”
He marvels in his hyung’s increased eloquence in Chinese, but keeps his thoughts to himself, squeezing Hankyung’s hand instead.
“Before you-and everyone else-came to China, I wished that I could see you again. And then I did,” he sighs. “But you’re wrong, Kuixian. I don’t miss you sometimes. I miss you more than sometimes.”
And then it’s Kyuhyun’s turn to be silent, to take in the words and even though there aren’t too many of them, and the language expressed is not his native, not the one he’s comfortable in, he waits and processes everything. Their dark eyes stay connected the whole time, not bothering to swim around in their sockets for other subjects to look at when they have each other.
“It’s not possible for us to always be together, though.”
Kyuhyun lowers his eyes first, the ground is dark enough to be a black hole itself. Sort of, at least.
“I know. But it’d be nice.”
“Someday we’ll almost make it.”
“Don’t cry again, please,” he begs. Hankyung rubs his thumb along Kyuhyun’s knuckles.
“No promises.”
Hankyung gives a short pause, bottom lip squished between his teeth. “Just don’t cry by yourself.”
By the time they get back, and Kyuhyun is laced with a light sheen of sweat from pedaling so much, the sun is peeking at them. They’ve barely slept.
“They said you’d need to be back at seven.”
Sigh. “Yeah.”
“Might want to get your things, then.”
“I will.”
“Kuixian.”
“Hm?”
“I’ll miss you.”
“More than sometimes.”
Kyuhyun meets Sungmin outside the airport. Sungmin doesn’t say much to him, and Kyuhyun doesn’t say much in return for his silence. But their eyes say enough, and Sungmin brings Kyuhyun through the automatic doors, into the arms of his hyungs. Kyuhyun holds Sungmin’s hand underneath a scratchy airplane blanket on the flight home, but he easily forgets that it’s not Hankyung’s.
It’s easy to forget things that aren’t Hankyung’s.
--
the scene with the well is partially inspired by one of the first scenes in Haruki Murakami's Norwegian Wood, where Naoko tells Toru about the well.