haha this took 2 hours to write and I'm not cutting it

[leofairy]

So we partayed today at casa de beki and for some reason best known to the intricate workings of her mind she early into the day decides to announce something about elly and tim, ugh, without warning, thanks a lot. (Lowdown: tim is someone I believe she knows through either old friend loz or old {first} bf pete, who she has kept in contact with, I

Comments

[noisyhearts]

So, reading that I get that me and you are kinda similar in some ways. Not the situation, of course, but the kinda feelings you described, yeah, I've been there, I know what that is like. So no negative opinions of you at all. And although my saying this isn't going to change how you feel at all, you are a good person and whoever eventaully gets to take you home is very lucky.

Also, that shouldn't hurt your tattoo :] hope it heals good.

[leofairy]

I'm sure lots of people feel like that and for the most part are often more accepting of it in others. I love other people with a big pile o' crazy, and it sort of pains me when they repress it, so just paint me hypocrite blue. You however seem to have quite a genuine balance of positivity though which is possibly why you are so lovely without being one of those scary I'M HAPPY HONEST *TWITCH* people that make my brain fall out..

And oh goooood, I was worried knocking the scab would fade the ink or something.

[mirfainlasui]

Ok.

Do some posts from Australia not friendslocked so I can see how you're getting on/know you're ok?

Also, on a completely seperate note, me and Diane have just spent a couple of hours playing spot the Leo on the barrier, because we just watched the Dresden Dolls DVD from the Roundhouse last november, and you show up quite a few times. Most obviously during Modern Moonlight, and at the end of Sing when everyone is clapping all the back up people. Have you watched the DVD? The documentary has some really cute Amanda-and-the-magnetic-pony-magic bits, and me and Diane have decided that Brian looks scarily like Ian (Matts friend Ian, not pervy Ian Armour)

Yes, that was about all. I hope Australia works out and is what's best for you.

xoxo

[leofairy]

We may not agree on some (or a lot) of pretty clashworthy things but you are still a very nice person, much of the time. A lot of my posts are public so it won't make much difference, to your reading, I was more apologising that I'd appear to be ignoring you when it wasn't anything actually your FAULT, because for the most part we get on great and I'm interested in your escapades, but all I'd do would horribly wrap everyone up in the Elly stuff and itd just drive everyone including myself mad, so I am sort of Buggering Off Until Sane.

And I haven't seen it, no, I must get it before we go, but I was like flailing my heart out to Sing so I hope its entertaining. Enjoyyyyyyyy it and life.

And Ian looks like Cedric Diggory! But less dead.

[mirfainlasui]

Firstly, Diane says hello.

Secondly. Ewww! You Bert and Gerard-ed me! I was halfway through reading your comment, thinking well gosh, this is quite pleasant, and then I noticed it! It was a shock to my system. Why would you do that? Unless it was carrying on the theme of Gerard being a man slut and kising other band people, in which case never mind.

Well if you're unfriending me, I'll friendslock all the Elly bits and you wont be able to see those, only non-Elly escapades.

It's only you at the end of Sing clapping and smiling. During Sing its just of the Dolls. Also! the Brian carrying Amanda off his adorable, apparently he did do it the night we were there(the DVD is of the second night, although in the documentary we see Diane's arm which is thrilling.) but I don't remember that.

[leofairy]

Go have a look at what the icon's keywords are.

And Tarja says miaow, she's happy because Millie has vanished.

[nolongerhome]

I’m not sure if you want my opinion on this. I don’t know all of the details, all the ins and outs, but I do know enough to realise that you are being incredibly hard on yourself

[leofairy]

I'm afraid you might come to find that I'm an awesome bubbly person on paper (or in pixels) and a wonderful concoction of dull and demanding in person. There is very little about the myself that people meet that is MYSELF, I attentionseek and play up to things, and copy people in a way that may be flattering but is also Life Plagarism. My relationship with Elly was one of the few places I a) didnt have any of those traits in place and b) was one of the few things I was interested in for myself, not because someone else brought it into my life. To find out it was a load of bollocks therefore really does piss all over my self worth, because me acting as I would naturally and how I thought appropriate = shot down and labelled crazy stalking bitch that's way too draining to have real FEELINGS for. There are very few people not intimidated by or even critical of the sort of obsessive attention I naturally give and demand back, and while I may meet one that likes me, until then I just rattle around whinging on about the same old same old,

[nolongerhome]

Just becase some people don't like you, find you too intense, whatever... that doesn't make you a bad person. Even if it is the majority of people that think that, that doesn't make you a person

[leofairy]

That was a very long comment and I don't mean to be rude, but I sort of didn't really absorb much of it. I don't just act childlike, half the time I am extremely childish and generally don't understand when people give me well structured, encouraging opinions and advice, mainly because my own thoughts and feelings are anything BUT structured and most of the time I can't really grasp them well enough to make coherent sentences out of them, and I seem to have regressed to the attention span of a dead gnat. I find it hard to read or listen to someone trying to help me like that (and my therapist does, which is why I have the ever present vague guilt Mum is paying her to talk to me for no reason) because I don't understand how I can make it fix things, and I generally can't remember what I've been told five minutes afterwards. However, I'll give it a go at the bits I understand