Comments | less_for_you: FIC for writermerrin: "In His Eyes" (G)

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FIC for writermerrin: "In His Eyes" (G)

May 18, 2010 18:48

Title: In His Eyes
Author: imisstheobvious
Recipient: writermerrin
Rating: G
Word count: ~2,000
Warnings: None
Summary: A series of events from 1976-1979; mistakes and consequences, and perhaps a chance at something different.
Disclaimer: The recognizable characters belong to JKR and not to me. I’m just playing with them.
Author's Notes:

( In His Eyes )

round_2010, fic

Comments 5

cathedralcarver May 18 2010, 17:08:55 UTC

This very nearly broke my heart, in a very good way. So much about Snape and his backstory is about pain and loss and bad choices. Lily was something good and pure in his life that also went all to hell in the end. Thank goodness for fanfic, yes? And the fact that so many of us manage to look at him empathetically.

"Better late than never." He lifted one ungloved, cold hand and rested it against her cheek. He brushed his thumb along her lower lip before letting his hand fall away. "You were right," he said quietly. "I'm sorrier than you'll ever know."

These lines really caught my attention because "Better late than never" is such a fitting motto for him. Very well done.

shyfoxling May 18 2010, 20:20:06 UTC

I like the whole idea of the symbolism here.

Flushing slightly, she broke the kiss. Tilting her chin, she regarded him. "Am I still the only thing in your eyes, Severus?"

"Always," he assured her before he released her from his embrace, wrapping an arm around her waist so they could walk along.

Awwww....! *dribble*

duniazade May 18 2010, 21:50:04 UTC

This is very lovely as well as heartbreaking; I admire how you ended on a note of hope, which only twists the knife some more. Well done.

orpheus_samhain May 19 2010, 14:53:00 UTC

You beautifully played that 'in your eyes' motif :) It bounds the whole story and invokes canon so well :) I really hope they will work out their differences.

tjs_whatnot May 27 2010, 02:48:40 UTC

AWESOME!

What a great look into theme and imagery tied into glimpses of canon! I love it!

I also really liked this line:

There was a fair bit of acid in her voice because anger was easier to deal with than pain.

And the entire last half dozen paragraphs were really good and made me smile and sorta tear up a bit. :(( Poor them! DOOMED!