Comments | less_for_you: FIC for peskywhistpaw: "Things Lily Thinks But Never Says in Fourth Year"

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FIC for peskywhistpaw: "Things Lily Thinks But Never Says in Fourth Year"

Jun 16, 2008 18:49

Title: Things Lily Thinks But Never Says in Fourth Year
Author: bewarethesmirk
Recipient: peskywhistpaw
Rating: PG-13
Words: ~4,000
Warnings: None.
Summary: Lily Evans thinks fourth year will be the same as third year, but she’ll be proven wrong on more than one occasion by none other than her friend, Severus Snape.
Author's Notes: I really hope you enjoy this, peskywhistpaw! Thank you ( Read more... )

fic, round_2008

Comments 27

lavinialavender June 17 2008, 05:55:19 UTC

GREAT FIC. :D It's so wonderful to see a truly good Lily/Severus fic, but this is. Great simple moments, all IC too! I love the kisses - I think my favorite is actually when she kisses his black eye. I also really love how REQUITED it is, how much Lily cares about him. This is love, thank you so much.

bewarethesmirk June 25 2008, 22:26:53 UTC

Thank you so much for your wonderful comments! I love the kissing the black eye scene, too. :) I can see that as some earth tilting off its axis experience for Snape. He probably wants to hate the "pity" but can't help himself.

bemoan1000 June 19 2008, 13:50:37 UTC

Great fic. There is so much DH left for our imaginations, and fics like yours help fill in the back stories of what could have happened. Well now that I’ve read this I like it and it has happened.

I like how you made the Lily’s parents trying to deal with both daughters, and how it is not all for Lily. It makes it more realistic.

” Severus searches her eyes for something, for some proof that she’s genuine. I wish you had someone to love you as you deserve to be loved, she thinks but does not say.

I like this line.

Great work.

bewarethesmirk June 25 2008, 22:28:12 UTC

I'm glad you can see this as a part of canon. I sometimes have a hard time imagining what Severus was thinking in regards to the Death Eaters and how he so obviously chose it over Lily--not that he meant to, really. It's something intriguing to explore in the future.

Thank you for reading!

(The comment has been removed)

bewarethesmirk June 25 2008, 22:29:11 UTC

Thank you, Not-So-Mysterious Commenter. I'm glad you liked it. :)

I was hooked on every word <3

Oh, thank God. That's the sort of response I crave. A story the reader can get into and doesn't want to end.

chiralove June 24 2008, 17:01:07 UTC

Ooooh, this is fabulous! I love Lily here - we don't see nearly enough of her in canon, but I can really see her being as you've characterized her - and your characterization of Severus is absolutely bloody wonderful. The black eye, the jinx, the way he acts around Lily, it's all amazing! The ending is perfect, too ... just perfect! What a beautiful, lovely story. :D

bewarethesmirk June 25 2008, 22:30:22 UTC

Thank you for your comments on characterization! I know you've read your fair share of Snape!fic, so it's nice to have such a comment by someone with Snape experience. :D

Your comments made me glow. *happy*

xnymphadorax June 24 2008, 22:39:00 UTC

I really enjoyed this. It was nice to see something from Lily's point of view because that's rare. It was even nicer to see her struggling with her feelings for Severus rather than the other way around. I liked your Lily a lot. She wasn't the typical sticky sweet Lily. She had her own brand of sarcasm and wit that made it evident why she's so attracted to Sev.

I enjoyed the physical contact between them especially. You made it clear that Severus doesn't touch anyone often, so every time he reached out for Lily we understood that it was a meaningful gesture and that was powerful.

I was frightened this would be angsty (mostly because of the title) but you left the ending ambiguous and I appreciated that. They do have fifth year to endure but you leave us with the smallest semblance of hope that things could change. Nicely done.

bewarethesmirk June 25 2008, 22:33:23 UTC

An insightful commenter!

I think a lot of people find it easier to enter writing Snily through an emo!Snape perspective. And while it's intriguing, I think there's something intriguing about Lily. JKR has alluded that Lily would not have chosen James if Snape hadn't persisted in hanging out with the DEs-in-training. I try to explore that angle and the look at the tragedy of what-might-have-been.

I enjoyed the physical contact between them especially. You made it clear that Severus doesn't touch anyone often, so every time he reached out for Lily we understood that it was a meaningful gesture and that was powerful.

Yes! Beautiful observation.

I think the ending is most tragic/angsty in what we know as readers--unless you enter AU land. :D