A Dance With Dragons review (spoilers!!!)
SUPER SUPER SPOILERY REVIEW OF A DANCE WITH DRAGONS. SPOILERS!!!
• I have waited patiently for six years for this book to be released, and I would cheerfully have waited six years more if it had been needed. Because this book was amazing! \o/
I cannot wait to see this adapted to TV! Together with A Feast For Crows this will make for some awesomely The West Wing:y seasons of GoT, except somehow even better. Yay. :D
• Winter is here, at last! I liked how the white raven heralding a change of season showed up in the epilogue of the book. :)
Now they'll have to switch to "summer is coming", or something.
• JON SNOW, NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! D: My bb. My second fave character. WHY GRRM WHY. ;__;
Although, at least he's a warg. So if Ghost is fine (and he should be! One of Jon's friends will release him to the wild. Or maybe that other warg with the boar, he might help out Ghost), Jon Snow's ghost could just live on in Ghost. And then in the next book we would have chapters titled "Ghost" about Ghost and Jon's ghost. Which, like, practically makes it worth it!
Or, you know, Jon could be fin. He only got stabbed, like, a bunch of times. Uhm. Maybe Melisandre can use magic to fix him..? *grasping at straws here, people!*
He's not allowed to disappear from the books completely, though. He's just not.
I'd be cool with him being a wolf. I mean, his brother's a tree now, so why the hell not.
At least dead!Jon would mean the series wouldn't have a clichéd Jon-becomes-the-king-after-it's-revealed-he-was-the-heir-all-along-omg ending. So that's good, I guess...
• lol Bran's a tree. I gasped when he talked to Ned and Ned sort of heard him. I did NOT expect time travel stuff to show up in this book. It was cool to see the first Starks.
I like how Bran showed up in other characters' chapters, despite being beyond the wall. Him talking to Theon and that making Theon a more decent person was really nice. I like the idea of tree!Bran randomly talking to people through the trees in the next book. It sounds kind of fun.
• I'm pissed at the lack of Sansa. She was really interesting in the last book, I really wanted to read more about her. Needs moar Sansa, book! :(
• I wonder who Arya is gonna off next. The bit with the face changing were gross, I thought, otherwise the Arya chapters weren't very exciting.
• Holy shit, I freaked out in Asha's first chapter when we were led to believe she was being raped, and then it turned out she was just roleplaying with her boyfriend. GRRM is such a freaking troll to his readers sometimes, that was just mean. >:(
I'm very happy she didn't get burninated in this book, I was getting increasingly worried about that when reading her chapters.
• Brienne's alive!!!! \o/
Also I thought Jaime was very decent in his chapter. It's nice that he hasn't regressed into old habits. :)
• Selmy is such a kick-ass old guy. Love him. I'm sad they cut the part where he kicks the guards' asses after Joff sends people to arrest him, in season one of the show. That would have been such a fun scene!
• ♥DANY MY QUEEN♥ you're finally back!!! Oh I have missed you the most. <333
I don't really know what to say except "omg Danyyyyyy"....
• Did Tyrion rape that slave girl in the beginning? If so, gross. :(
Other than that, he was an awesome one-liner-spewing smartass, which is always great. I was super shocked at the Aegon reveal. :O HOLY SHIT ANOTHER TARGARYEN. :O
Penny the girl and Pretty the pig. Aww. :( I hope Penny ends up living a nice life, at the series end.
• Jorah can you get any creepier? Hiring prostitutes who look like Dany? Seriously, Dany's like fourteen. It's fucking creepy, dude. ewww.
• Yay more Cersei! I was dying to read more of her after AFFC. I'm curious how the trial will go. Is that zombie knight the Mountain?
• Poor Quentyn. He was just a kid. :(
• Lady Nymeria joining the small council will probably be a lot of fun. XD I look forward to it!
• Holy shiiiiiit, poor Theon! Never did I think I'd write those words. But GRRM actually made me feel sorry for that ass.
And Ramsay might be the most horrible character in the books. Holy shit he is evil!! DDDD:
• JEYNE JEYNE IT RHYMES WITH PAIN. Poor Jeyne. ;__;
• I fucking loved it when Jon cut off Janos Slynt's head. THAT WAS EXCELLENT. :DDD
• Ahahaha I still think it's hilarious that Melisandre thinks Stannis is Azor Ahai. XD
I so, so, sooo want her to find out about Daenerys in a chapter we get to see it in. It will be hilarious! XD
Also she was an interesting POV character. I hope she remains one. :)
I wonder if Jon Snow might be Azor Ahai rather than Dany? Dany fits much better, but Melisandre kept seeing Jon Snow's face whenever she asked the fire to show her the face of Azor Ahai...
• JOOOONNNNN ;__;
• "Dead things in the forest. Dead things in the water."
WATER ZOMBIES??? :O
Like, zombie fish (heeeh, The Middleman XD), or zombie krakens, or what are we talking about here?
I hope we get a POV from one of the Night Watch Men stuck there beyond the Wall, in the next book.
• Victarion is such a sociopath. And I'm pretty sure Dany wouldn't approve of what he's doing to the slaves he's freeing in her honor.
• That last scene with Dany and she's barefoot and food poisoned and she has a dragon and then a khal shows up and omg. OMG. Next book, please!
• Bran totally has a crush on Meera, don't he? Awww. ♥
• Coldhands is so Benjen Stark, isn't he? Freaky!
• So the mad king fancied Tywin's wife? And took liberties during the wedding night? Uhm. I know there's a theory that Tyrion isn't Tywin's son (which would still make him half-Lannister, since his supposed parents were cousins (right?)), but... what if CERSEI and JAIME are actually the Mad King's kids?
That would explain the incest...
• Uhmmm I haven't even mentioned all the characters, but since there's to many characters to mention anyway, I think I'm just gonna end it here.
I really loved the book. What did you guys think?
• I have waited patiently for six years for this book to be released, and I would cheerfully have waited six years more if it had been needed. Because this book was amazing! \o/
I cannot wait to see this adapted to TV! Together with A Feast For Crows this will make for some awesomely The West Wing:y seasons of GoT, except somehow even better. Yay. :D
• Winter is here, at last! I liked how the white raven heralding a change of season showed up in the epilogue of the book. :)
Now they'll have to switch to "summer is coming", or something.
• JON SNOW, NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! D: My bb. My second fave character. WHY GRRM WHY. ;__;
Although, at least he's a warg. So if Ghost is fine (and he should be! One of Jon's friends will release him to the wild. Or maybe that other warg with the boar, he might help out Ghost), Jon Snow's ghost could just live on in Ghost. And then in the next book we would have chapters titled "Ghost" about Ghost and Jon's ghost. Which, like, practically makes it worth it!
Or, you know, Jon could be fin. He only got stabbed, like, a bunch of times. Uhm. Maybe Melisandre can use magic to fix him..? *grasping at straws here, people!*
He's not allowed to disappear from the books completely, though. He's just not.
I'd be cool with him being a wolf. I mean, his brother's a tree now, so why the hell not.
At least dead!Jon would mean the series wouldn't have a clichéd Jon-becomes-the-king-after-it's-revealed-he-was-the-heir-all-along-omg ending. So that's good, I guess...
• lol Bran's a tree. I gasped when he talked to Ned and Ned sort of heard him. I did NOT expect time travel stuff to show up in this book. It was cool to see the first Starks.
I like how Bran showed up in other characters' chapters, despite being beyond the wall. Him talking to Theon and that making Theon a more decent person was really nice. I like the idea of tree!Bran randomly talking to people through the trees in the next book. It sounds kind of fun.
• I'm pissed at the lack of Sansa. She was really interesting in the last book, I really wanted to read more about her. Needs moar Sansa, book! :(
• I wonder who Arya is gonna off next. The bit with the face changing were gross, I thought, otherwise the Arya chapters weren't very exciting.
• Holy shit, I freaked out in Asha's first chapter when we were led to believe she was being raped, and then it turned out she was just roleplaying with her boyfriend. GRRM is such a freaking troll to his readers sometimes, that was just mean. >:(
I'm very happy she didn't get burninated in this book, I was getting increasingly worried about that when reading her chapters.
• Brienne's alive!!!! \o/
Also I thought Jaime was very decent in his chapter. It's nice that he hasn't regressed into old habits. :)
• Selmy is such a kick-ass old guy. Love him. I'm sad they cut the part where he kicks the guards' asses after Joff sends people to arrest him, in season one of the show. That would have been such a fun scene!
• ♥DANY MY QUEEN♥ you're finally back!!! Oh I have missed you the most. <333
I don't really know what to say except "omg Danyyyyyy"....
• Did Tyrion rape that slave girl in the beginning? If so, gross. :(
Other than that, he was an awesome one-liner-spewing smartass, which is always great. I was super shocked at the Aegon reveal. :O HOLY SHIT ANOTHER TARGARYEN. :O
Penny the girl and Pretty the pig. Aww. :( I hope Penny ends up living a nice life, at the series end.
• Jorah can you get any creepier? Hiring prostitutes who look like Dany? Seriously, Dany's like fourteen. It's fucking creepy, dude. ewww.
• Yay more Cersei! I was dying to read more of her after AFFC. I'm curious how the trial will go. Is that zombie knight the Mountain?
• Poor Quentyn. He was just a kid. :(
• Lady Nymeria joining the small council will probably be a lot of fun. XD I look forward to it!
• Holy shiiiiiit, poor Theon! Never did I think I'd write those words. But GRRM actually made me feel sorry for that ass.
And Ramsay might be the most horrible character in the books. Holy shit he is evil!! DDDD:
• JEYNE JEYNE IT RHYMES WITH PAIN. Poor Jeyne. ;__;
• I fucking loved it when Jon cut off Janos Slynt's head. THAT WAS EXCELLENT. :DDD
• Ahahaha I still think it's hilarious that Melisandre thinks Stannis is Azor Ahai. XD
I so, so, sooo want her to find out about Daenerys in a chapter we get to see it in. It will be hilarious! XD
Also she was an interesting POV character. I hope she remains one. :)
I wonder if Jon Snow might be Azor Ahai rather than Dany? Dany fits much better, but Melisandre kept seeing Jon Snow's face whenever she asked the fire to show her the face of Azor Ahai...
• JOOOONNNNN ;__;
• "Dead things in the forest. Dead things in the water."
WATER ZOMBIES??? :O
Like, zombie fish (heeeh, The Middleman XD), or zombie krakens, or what are we talking about here?
I hope we get a POV from one of the Night Watch Men stuck there beyond the Wall, in the next book.
• Victarion is such a sociopath. And I'm pretty sure Dany wouldn't approve of what he's doing to the slaves he's freeing in her honor.
• That last scene with Dany and she's barefoot and food poisoned and she has a dragon and then a khal shows up and omg. OMG. Next book, please!
• Bran totally has a crush on Meera, don't he? Awww. ♥
• Coldhands is so Benjen Stark, isn't he? Freaky!
• So the mad king fancied Tywin's wife? And took liberties during the wedding night? Uhm. I know there's a theory that Tyrion isn't Tywin's son (which would still make him half-Lannister, since his supposed parents were cousins (right?)), but... what if CERSEI and JAIME are actually the Mad King's kids?
That would explain the incest...
• Uhmmm I haven't even mentioned all the characters, but since there's to many characters to mention anyway, I think I'm just gonna end it here.
I really loved the book. What did you guys think?