Title: Ache (1/1)
Author: lexiesloan
Rating: T
Pairing: Daenerys Targaryen/Khal Drogo
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Summary: Remember... and come back to me.
…
Come back to me, my sun and stars.
Daenerys whispered the words into the wind every morning, her eyes closed and the sun warm on her skin. No matter where she was, no matter where she had slept - whether on the ground in a tent or on a feather bed in a castle - she would wake up and immediately stand in the grass or at the edge of the water or at the window of the bed chamber and whisper those words, knowing that wherever he was, he could hear her.
But he never answered her. She listened for him - hoping to hear him in the wind that danced across her bare skin - but he never did and her heart seemed to grow heavier with each day.
It was less than one year since she had placed the pillow over his face, since he left her and went somewhere so far away, and the man had terrified her the first time she saw him sitting astride his powerful horse, staring at her but now, she would give anything to be able to see him again.
She had her dragons and she had her khalasar and soon, she would have the throne that was rightfully hers. But she didn’t have her Khal and it almost frightened her how, even after listening to Viserys talking her entire life about it, she now wanted Drogo more than she wanted the iron throne. She may have been the dragon - the last of her kind - but she wanted her sun and stars.
…
She wondered if he watched her from wherever he was.
He had promised her the iron throne. He had promised her so many things. She hadn’t been ready to lose him, yet. There hadn’t been enough time. They hadn’t had enough time.
After years of his torment, she knew Viserys was wrong. She wasn’t weak. She wasn’t a nobody. She was Daenerys Targaryen, Khaleesi of the Dothraki khalasar, daughter, bride and mother of dragons and soon, she would be the queen of the seven kingdoms. She was strong on her own.
But when she had been with him, when he had stood next to her, she had felt unstoppable; like she could do anything.
Now, most times, she just felt lost.
…
She rode by herself after waking.
Climbing onto the silver filly he had given her on the day of their wedding, she rode against the wind, leaning down against the mare’s neck and closing her eyes, whispering his name. Most mornings, she could imagine another set of hooves running alongside her and she told herself that he was running right next to her.
She hated opening her eyes and finding herself alone.
…
He had told her once that a Khal did not have a long life. She had never wanted to believe him. Maybe previous ones had not but she was married to Khal Drogo. He was the fiercest warrior in the world who had never been defeated.
During the ceremony when she had eaten the horse heart for Rhaego growing inside of her, she had seen all of the widows - the wives of past Khals, all who were dead and gone - and they had all been so young.
But their Khals had not be hers.
She had never thought of the possibility of Drogo leaving her so soon.
She had thought that he would always be there. They would be together. Side by side. Always.
…
Come back to me, my sun and stars.
She never cried in front of anyone but in the mornings, when she rode by herself, and stopped when she knew no one was near, she buried her face in the filly’s neck and her body shook with sobs. A soft wind tickled across her skin and she whispered his name.
She wondered if she was allowed to cry. She was a dragon and a khaleesi and crying was a sign of weakness.
But she was also a girl - a young woman - and she had been in love and she would give anything to have him there with her again.
…
Moon of my life.
She was dreaming of him - just as she did every other night. They were lying naked on the furs of her tent, surrounded by the flickering warmth of the candles, and his hands - rough and heavy - trailed with a delicateness down the slope of her bare back. She kissed the scars on his chest, her thigh sliding along his hip. He whispered her name and she whispered his and their lips curved into smiles when they shared soft kisses.
Come back to me.
This time, he answered her - the first time he had ever answered - and the one word made her bolt out of her dream and sleep.
Soon.
…