Learning and losing...
"A friend will break your heart, a friend will mend it, a friend will provide you with every feeling in the world, good and bad. A friend is emotion incarnate."
I sit here
Try to find a way
To miss you less
I try to find a patch
To cover the spot
The hole
Where the person was
That was always there
I try to find something
To heal me, to dry me
My eyes, fountains
Wondering, what
What was it
That seemed to be strong
But was gone, all gone
After one
One large fight
The first as friends
Sorry, not friends
I freeze when I see you
I don't know
Know what to do
Or what to say to you
I just know
I can't be friendly
Cause I can't put my heart
Put my heart out there again
For it to be taken
Taken for granted again
So easy to trample
And say goodbye..
Ughh.. I am actually doing okay with everything that happened between me and Claire. Or was, seeing that she finally deleted me as a friend on facebook, just set it off again. Sometimes, I just can't help but miss her, miss her so, so much, and I have no idea what in the hell to do about it. It would help if I really knew how she felt. She was supposed to have talked to me after she had time to think and did text me and make a time to call, and then, just.. never did.... Which just annoyed me. She didn't think there was anything else to say, but she wasn't the only person dealing with something in it. Every freakin time I see her, my heart races, and I just get cold, cause I have no idea how in the hell to react, how to treat her, how shes going to react to me. I know angela is right and I should be polite, but not friendly. But me, not being friendly to her, going to be hard.. With her and what she meant( and means) to me makes me very easily want to be friendly. God, this is the hardest thing I have gone through with a friend, and I am slowly but surely figuring it, but yet am so confused. I still think that everything ended over what happened at the end of break, was extreme.. I still can't help but feel that part of our friendship was lost because of her drawing closer to Hannah, and taking away from ours. I felt like a 3rd wheel everytime I was with them.. That sounds so selfish, I know, but I am trying to still find what the hell happened... I know some of it, but some it's just like how did we pull away from each other so badly?? That it led to one thing by me and down the drain...
I have tp let it go, and I will.
But its all still so close to the surface, and I still have to figure out how to process it. How to lose a friend who led me to things that made life changes in my life, church...
Miss you... Still love ya as my friend, and am learning to be strong and be without, because I respect you..
I sit here
Try to find a way
To miss you less
I try to find a patch
To cover the spot
The hole
Where the person was
That was always there
I try to find something
To heal me, to dry me
My eyes, fountains
Wondering, what
What was it
That seemed to be strong
But was gone, all gone
After one
One large fight
The first as friends
Sorry, not friends
I freeze when I see you
I don't know
Know what to do
Or what to say to you
I just know
I can't be friendly
Cause I can't put my heart
Put my heart out there again
For it to be taken
Taken for granted again
So easy to trample
And say goodbye..
Ughh.. I am actually doing okay with everything that happened between me and Claire. Or was, seeing that she finally deleted me as a friend on facebook, just set it off again. Sometimes, I just can't help but miss her, miss her so, so much, and I have no idea what in the hell to do about it. It would help if I really knew how she felt. She was supposed to have talked to me after she had time to think and did text me and make a time to call, and then, just.. never did.... Which just annoyed me. She didn't think there was anything else to say, but she wasn't the only person dealing with something in it. Every freakin time I see her, my heart races, and I just get cold, cause I have no idea how in the hell to react, how to treat her, how shes going to react to me. I know angela is right and I should be polite, but not friendly. But me, not being friendly to her, going to be hard.. With her and what she meant( and means) to me makes me very easily want to be friendly. God, this is the hardest thing I have gone through with a friend, and I am slowly but surely figuring it, but yet am so confused. I still think that everything ended over what happened at the end of break, was extreme.. I still can't help but feel that part of our friendship was lost because of her drawing closer to Hannah, and taking away from ours. I felt like a 3rd wheel everytime I was with them.. That sounds so selfish, I know, but I am trying to still find what the hell happened... I know some of it, but some it's just like how did we pull away from each other so badly?? That it led to one thing by me and down the drain...
I have tp let it go, and I will.
But its all still so close to the surface, and I still have to figure out how to process it. How to lose a friend who led me to things that made life changes in my life, church...
Miss you... Still love ya as my friend, and am learning to be strong and be without, because I respect you..