Bicycles

[li7h]

Cyclists. They come up behind you and ding their little bells, apparently completely unaware that there is any other method of signaling their presence that will not cause a lesser degree of downright fury. When I hear that ding, I feel the immediate urge to execute a brutal beating with a bike pump, an overflowing of wrath ultimately culminating

Comments

[ravag3]

I'm fairly certain that unless it's a designated shared pathway (in which case stop bitching - it reminds me of that time you complained about all the heterosexuals at mardi gras) it is illegal for them to even be on the footpath.

I am too tired for evidence.. I merely espouse a suspicion.

If this is, in fact, the case and they are in error, I recommend the following course of action:
1. Acquire megaphone
2. Point megaphone at cyclist
3. Activate megaphone and produce a sound that might resemble a loud, annoying fog horn
4. Maintain as they cycle away into the distance

Or alternatively steps 1-2 followed by
3. Chase cyclist along footpath with megaphone shouting "BRRRING BRRRING" ad infinitum until either your complete lack of fitness renders you immobile or you cop a soft shoe to the face.

[li7h]

I also think that it is, in fact, illegal to be cycling like a dropkick cockmunching lunatic on the footpath.

I'll start toting a megaphone about in future, though I do like the poetic justice involved in shouting "BRRRING BRRING NRRIWIGWSDI"