maybe i base too much of my life around the simpsons
marge: only three cavities, bart, your best checkup ever! i'm going to make
you my specialty...
i was looking down at my slippers the other day and was reminded of that quote. suddenly i had an idea. i must make butterscotch chicken. forget the fact that it was joke. forget the fact that it's revealed in an earlier episode that bart is actually allergic to butterscotch (and imitation butterscotch). most of all, forget the fact that i don't even like butterscotch. i had an idea in my head and i was going to do it.
my face after merely smelling the bag of butterscotch chips. did i mention i don't like butterscotch? clearly i have problems.
so while contemplating how to execute this recipe i thought about what goes with butterscotch. ah, peanuts go with butterscotch! i'll work those in there somehow. my basic plan from this point was to make some kind of butterscotch sauce, then for the chicken cut it up into bite size pieces and cover it in smashed up peanuts similar to...say...coating it breadcrumbs. now what the hell is this a picture of, you might wonder. well i put the peanuts in a ziploc bag to smash them then my tv show came back from commercial so i stopped what i was doing and went to watch. next commercial break i went back to the kitchen and decided i should just bring the peanut bag over to the tv so i could both at once. oops i forgot to close the bag! those are peanuts that spilled on the kitchen floor because tv made me stupid.
it may be hard to tell but that's a peanut sticking slightly out of my mouth. turns out i don't like peanuts either. actually, i've known this for years but still thought it would be a good idea to smother chicken with them. what the hell is wrong with me that makes me do this to myself!?
peanuts are smashed. pots and pans are ready. the creation begins!!! (aka this is a really boring picture and i'm not sure why i bothered taking it)
it's the cayenne pepper that allie gave me. i used it!
heating up some oil and garlic. another boring picture!
this is my butterscotch sauce. it consists of one cup heavy cream, 1 cup of butterscotch chips, and an absurd amount of cayenne pepper because honestly, absurd is the only amount of cayenne i know how to use. i considered using milk to be a little healthier but then i realized...i'm putting butterscotch on chicken, fuck milk. i actually really enjoyed the taste of the sauce at this point, but i love spicy sweets so i'm not terribly surprised.
i couldn't find a bag big enough to hold all the chicken and still be able to coat it in peanuts so i used two. obviously, these are my bags of chicken and peanut pieces.
into the pan with you!
sometimes you have to sneak up in the shadows to check if your food is cooking. that or it's just hard to take good pictures of yourself cooking. or maybe it's just difficult for me because it seemed a bit much to use the timer just to take a picture of myself cooking.
once the chicken was finished i used the extra egg wash to make scrambled eggs. it seemed like a good back up plan. i also made some peas but i had doubts about how interesting a picture of the microwave would be.
the finished meal! with better lighting and more attractive sides i feel like this could grace the cover of any food magazine. except any focused on meals for vegetarians or diabetics.
the first bite! the verdict is: edible!
i don't want to call this a failure but it definitely wasn't...what's the word...good? actually i kind of enjoyed it but the butterscotch lost the spicy flavor somewhere along the way and that was really the only reason i liked the sauce to begin with. i think if i added more spice or picked a different sweet flavor like vanilla it would actually work. plus i've seen recipes for vanilla chicken so i know someone out there thinks it would work. i'd probably get rid of the peanuts, but if i actually liked peanuts they probably would have been a good addition. maybe i could work with peanut butter.
anyway, i made enough for two (because obviously one round of chicken covered in things i hate wasn't enough) so if you're dying to try it and you don't want to make it yourself, drive several hours to my apartment and i'll heat it up. for free!
you my specialty...
i was looking down at my slippers the other day and was reminded of that quote. suddenly i had an idea. i must make butterscotch chicken. forget the fact that it was joke. forget the fact that it's revealed in an earlier episode that bart is actually allergic to butterscotch (and imitation butterscotch). most of all, forget the fact that i don't even like butterscotch. i had an idea in my head and i was going to do it.
my face after merely smelling the bag of butterscotch chips. did i mention i don't like butterscotch? clearly i have problems.
so while contemplating how to execute this recipe i thought about what goes with butterscotch. ah, peanuts go with butterscotch! i'll work those in there somehow. my basic plan from this point was to make some kind of butterscotch sauce, then for the chicken cut it up into bite size pieces and cover it in smashed up peanuts similar to...say...coating it breadcrumbs. now what the hell is this a picture of, you might wonder. well i put the peanuts in a ziploc bag to smash them then my tv show came back from commercial so i stopped what i was doing and went to watch. next commercial break i went back to the kitchen and decided i should just bring the peanut bag over to the tv so i could both at once. oops i forgot to close the bag! those are peanuts that spilled on the kitchen floor because tv made me stupid.
it may be hard to tell but that's a peanut sticking slightly out of my mouth. turns out i don't like peanuts either. actually, i've known this for years but still thought it would be a good idea to smother chicken with them. what the hell is wrong with me that makes me do this to myself!?
peanuts are smashed. pots and pans are ready. the creation begins!!! (aka this is a really boring picture and i'm not sure why i bothered taking it)
it's the cayenne pepper that allie gave me. i used it!
heating up some oil and garlic. another boring picture!
this is my butterscotch sauce. it consists of one cup heavy cream, 1 cup of butterscotch chips, and an absurd amount of cayenne pepper because honestly, absurd is the only amount of cayenne i know how to use. i considered using milk to be a little healthier but then i realized...i'm putting butterscotch on chicken, fuck milk. i actually really enjoyed the taste of the sauce at this point, but i love spicy sweets so i'm not terribly surprised.
i couldn't find a bag big enough to hold all the chicken and still be able to coat it in peanuts so i used two. obviously, these are my bags of chicken and peanut pieces.
into the pan with you!
sometimes you have to sneak up in the shadows to check if your food is cooking. that or it's just hard to take good pictures of yourself cooking. or maybe it's just difficult for me because it seemed a bit much to use the timer just to take a picture of myself cooking.
once the chicken was finished i used the extra egg wash to make scrambled eggs. it seemed like a good back up plan. i also made some peas but i had doubts about how interesting a picture of the microwave would be.
the finished meal! with better lighting and more attractive sides i feel like this could grace the cover of any food magazine. except any focused on meals for vegetarians or diabetics.
the first bite! the verdict is: edible!
i don't want to call this a failure but it definitely wasn't...what's the word...good? actually i kind of enjoyed it but the butterscotch lost the spicy flavor somewhere along the way and that was really the only reason i liked the sauce to begin with. i think if i added more spice or picked a different sweet flavor like vanilla it would actually work. plus i've seen recipes for vanilla chicken so i know someone out there thinks it would work. i'd probably get rid of the peanuts, but if i actually liked peanuts they probably would have been a good addition. maybe i could work with peanut butter.
anyway, i made enough for two (because obviously one round of chicken covered in things i hate wasn't enough) so if you're dying to try it and you don't want to make it yourself, drive several hours to my apartment and i'll heat it up. for free!