Baby Crossroads, ethics and humanism

[lil_nomad]

So the child we were supposed to be placed with fell through at the last moment. I find myself thinking, if we had just inseminated, I would have a child in my arms right now. Enter my ethics. I can't decided on what to do. I feel like I have a duty to our community and humaity to make a difference in this world, not matter how small the part. Sure

Comments

[mags2riches]

I totally hear you on adopting the kids that are already in the world and need a loving home. I'm sorry that your adoption fell through. What is your license for?

license?

[lil_nomad]

To adopt from foster care, you have to have a licensed home. They come and check periodically to make sure it is a safe enviornment to place a child. Every year, you have to renew it or you have to re-apply to adopt and go through many many hours of training all over again

Re: license?

[mags2riches]

Kids are always going through/stuck in the system. Renew, cuz you already did the work for it once, it seems like the renewal process wouldn't be that hard, much better than classes and full license from the begining again. and if you do end up getting a child through other means you can always say no

Re: license?

[mags2riches]

edit: the courageless person below

Duh

[anonymous]

i DON'T THINK that your dilema has to do with anything like babies, ethics, and humanities. I think it more or less has to do with babies, being overwhelmed, and frustration. You're looking at it the wrong way. Yes it's important and nice to make a difference however small. But the reality is it doesn't matter. Adopting one kid isn't really a way to take charge on humanity. But another reality is that one of the two of yourselves should of gotten knocked up, so the kid would be harder to take from you, since your lifestyle is gay. That's pretty much realism of it right there.

And secondly creation isn't an illness, nor should it be taken that way. You're looking to creation to add more to your life. And none of this is meant to be rude, at all. But actually you're probably just scared of the procedures of having a child, and the whole package like strecht marks, bloating, pain, and other harsh things of pregnancy.
Hopefully one of you will get over it.
-Good Luck

Re: Duh

[lil_nomad]

Actually, you couldn't be more wrong (compliments of my wonderfuls typos i'm sure). I am NOT afraid of birth or the process of birthing. I am a Doula and I childbirth educator. My complaint was abou thow our society treats pregnancy as a well managed medical condition, that I disagree with. Also, we were trying to adopt only one child. We wanted a sibling group and decided early on we would adopt as many as possible. With all do respect, I feel adopting one child WILL make a huge difference in the world.Yo udon't know me. You don't know about me personal experience with the foster system in Ca or my partners experience with the foster system here. I already have stretch marks, So I don't really care about that. Pain is Pain. Birth hurts thats a given and not a concern. I know more about birth than most given my perfession and anyone IN my perfession should not ever fear such a natural accurance. I think my typos really go you the wrong idea about me...really very wrong! I was having a major headache so I was typing with my glasses

Re: Duh

[anonymous]

P.S you probably did mean to be a smart ass, otherwise, you probably would not have posted anon. YOu are afraid to let me know who you are (even though, chances are I could care less). I have always had more respect for those that have the courage to voice their beliefs/convictions and NOT hide from the public regarding them

[anonymous]

Alrighty, i've ruffled some feathers but it was not my intention. There's many different ways i could go with these responses, (as cliche as it sounds) I don't know where to begin

"those who can't do ,teach"

[lil_nomad]

that is very accurate, but I CAN. I am perfectly fertile. I care not about labor or pain. I don't let fear or pain dictate my life. I understand your posts are based soley on a superficial internet journal and if you knew me, you would say otherwise. I make a consious decision to do something positive with every aspect of my life. I truely beleive in helping those less fortunate. I don't beleive on an afterlife therefore there is no heavenly alterior motive or personal gain. I just really feel like I am hear to help things.. everything. I also am having a difficult time understanding why you can't communicate without being a smart ass if you really aren't trying to offend? You can get your point across w/o blabbing about 4th grade educations and stuff

Re: "those who can't do ,teach"

[anonymous]

Yeah, ok. All i was saying that i felt you didn't want that experience for yourself. Given that you can have kids, from an anatomical means. I know! Yes, i've read some of your journal. But i think my views wouldn't go astray since i think your journal sums you up almost precisely.

Why i am so shitty with my words. To be honest it's lazyness. It's the easiest way.

Kudos to you for trying to confront the system. But like i tried to convey, you need to have a lets be honest moment with yourself.

So in conclusion i thought you just aren't up for it yourself. Plus your definition of pregnancy has problems. Though i think you were saying that we shouldn't use welfare to pay for it. And of course we shouldn't so duh, you're right when it comes to that. But next time i'll think twice commenting on your shit, cause Good Lord

Ok
Good Luck with all your endeavors!

Re: "those who can't do ,teach"

[lil_nomad]

Good Lord is Right!! I can usually win an argument/ discussion just by annoying the hell out of my debators (not that i'm right, people just get bothered and shut it.. works for me!!)