Redo - Chapter 5 Part 3
Chapter Listing
Part 1
Part 2
Al had been able to avoid meals so far since returning to his armor, but with Brigadier General Hughes, no Lieutenant Colonel Hughes, no Maes seated at the table he wanted to join them. So he sat next to his brother and watched the others eat, and wondered if Roy's cooking was just as good in 1916 as it was in 1922. Maybe it wasn't and the man had improved with age. He would have to ask his brother later.
"I still can't get over how much you've grown," Maes said to Ed from across the table.
Ed smiled. "You should see my 22 year old body. I feel so weird in this one. It's younger, and shorter, and heavier," he said while patting his automail arm.
"Well I'll get to see that in a few years, right? And Al's too." Maes included Al in his smile.
"We think my body is about 18, so only 4 years from now." Ed sighed wistfully, and Al wondered which feeling he was focusing on more, his longing for his older body or the fact that Lieutenant Colonel Hughes may get to actually see it this time.
"I wonder how old I'll be once we get my body back," Al said.
"You'll be 21, Al, just like I'm still 22," Ed said with a reassuring smile.
"But what about my body? Will it be 17? 15? 21? How will this affect it? Will my muscles be stronger? Weaker? Or the same? And I'll have to go through physical rehabilitation all over again," Al finished with a groan.
He felt a little bad when he saw his brother's forehead wrinkle with concern, but Al had all night to think things through, and there was just so much that was still uncertain, so much they he just did not want to have to redo.
"That's not that bad," Ed said, his concern shining only in his eyes as his mouth formed a wicked grin. "It gives you the perfect excuse to hang all over Winry." He smirked at Al, who knew he would be blushing if he was still made of flesh.
"Why don't you just take out an ad so that you can tell the whole world, brother?!"
"What? Ohh, come on, Hughes doesn't count-"
"Really? Then I'll just tell him about-"
"You wouldn't dare," Ed threatened, voice gruff, as he lunged across the table at Al.
Al jumped up with a laugh, and backed out of the room saying, "I'm going to go call Winry. Someone needs to order you a new arm or you'll never get anything done."
"Yeah yeah, you do that," Ed called after him. As Alphonse walked to the phone he heard the others start on his brother with more questions. Good, if brother wants to keep secrets so badly, then he can handle all of their questions.
Al picked up the phone and began to dial the familiar number, the one that would always mean Winry, and home, and was his own phone number not too long ago. He slammed the phone down. This was the first time that he would be speaking to a Winry that was not the one he saw only days ago. This Winry, the only Winry here, was younger-physically, mentally, emotionally-and probably couldn't even imagine what a 21-year-old Al looked like. She didn't love him the way his Winry did; she saw him as armor, not a future husband.
Hand shaking slightly Al lifted the phone and forced himself to dial. Putting it off wouldn't make the task any more pleasant.
One ring, then another.
Maybe she wouldn't even answer. Maybe Granny would answer and Al could just tell her. But that would be the coward's way out, he should talk to Winry herself. If Granny answered though, then he would at least have an extra couple of minutes to figure out what to say.
Another ring.
"Rockbell Automail, this is Winry speaking."
It was. The voice was slightly higher, but it was Winry, his Winry.
"Hello?"
"Oh um, hi, Winry. It's Al."
"Hi, Al, it's been a while."
Yes it has. It's been more than a day since I've heard you, seen you, held you. Why aren't you here? Better yet, why aren't I there?
"Yeah, I guess it has. We were wondering if maybe you could come visit us in East City."
"What happened? Is Ed okay? What did you're idiot brother do now?"
Al gave a nervous laugh. "Brother's fine. He's just grown a bit and his arms are a little uneven."
"Ed actually grew?"
"Believe it or not," Al said, laughing in earnest this time. "If you can't come here, then we can come to you. We're just in the middle of working on something and were hoping to stay in the city for a bit longer."
"I guess Ed shouldn't be traveling to much on uneven legs anyway," Winry said with a giggle, most likely imaging the same thing as Al: Ed hobbling around with one leg too short.
"Oh no, it's just his arm. His leg is fine."
"How's that? His arm grew but not his leg?"
"Umm." No brother already had an automail leg from the future. It seems to have merged with his past self just as much as the rest of him so it's, luckily, the right length, but he didn't have an automail arm for a bit so that's caused some problems.
Al wanted to tell Winry everything. He didn't want to lie to her, he never lied to her, but he couldn't explain this over the phone. Could he even tell her everything? How could Ed stand being so near and far from Roy for so long when Al couldn't stand a few minutes on the phone?
"Well something happened," Al said. "Sort of. No one's hurt, not really, but it's really complicated. It'd be easier to explain in person."
"But no one is hurt?"
"Right."
"And you just called about Ed's arm?"
"And because I missed you," he said without thinking. He covered his face with his leather hand. Stupid, stupid-
"I miss you too, Al."
With all of the things his armor couldn't feel, Al was just glad that he could still feel the flip of his nonexistent stomach as his nonexistent heart became feather light just from some soft spoken words from Winry.
"You should stay for a while. After you finish brothers arm."
"Really? I thought you guys were busy working."
"No, stay. We'll go to Rush Valley," he said, excited now by his sudden idea.
"Rush Valley! Really? That's the holy land of automail! I'd love to go! I'll have to make a list of parts to get." She let out an unintelligible squeal. "Rush Valley!"
"Actually, I've heard of this really great mechanic that lives there. He doesn't take apprentices, but it couldn't hurt to meet him, right, and see his work?"
"Apprenticeship? I never even thought about that…"
"Well, I'm not saying that you need one-you don't have to take on one-It was just a thought," Al rushed to say. He forgot that Winry didn't want an apprenticeship until she saw Ed's watch. He'd have to be careful not to influence her decisions, but he still though it was a good idea to go to Rush Valley so that Winry could meet Paninya and help deliver the baby.
Winry made a hmm noise that knocked Al out of his thoughts. "So how are you and Granny doing?" He asked, changing the subject.
"We're fine," she said hesitantly. "Nothing's really changed here." She laughed. "You know how it is."
"Yeah," he mumbled. He didn't want to hang up yet. He wanted to stay on the phone, and talk about nothing and everything, and not lose his link to home.
"Are you sure everything is okay, Al? You guys don't call very often."
This was Winry, Winry, his Winry, the girl he could tell everything to, surely he could talk to her about how he was feeling without explaining everything.
"I've just been thinking...what if, what if we're taking on too much. We have so much to do, Winry, and it's just us, and how could we- I, I-"
"Oh, Al..." she said softly. She was quiet for a moment before she said confidently, "There's one thing that I know for sure about you and your brother; you can do anything. Everyone knows that once the Elric brothers put their minds to a goal that they'll see it through."
"I guess..."
"No. Ed's so stubborn that he sees impossible as a challenge, not a limitation. And you're almost as bad, but at least you're smart enough to make sure that you both stay alive. You'll get your bodies back, Al, I'm sure of it."
"I know..." he said before repeating stronger, "I know. It's just... We've already been though so much, and we have so much left now, and- and I can't eat or sleep or... There's no warmth- it's not even cold all the time, it's just nothing. No hot, no cold, no smell or taste, and the nights are so long, and how do you fill that many nights?"
"Al, I- I'm so sorry, I-" she sounded like she was going to cry.
"Winry no, don't-" He hadn't meant to upset her, he just wanted to talk like they always did. So he said something he had said to her dozens of times before, something he hadn't technically ever asked this Winry yet, but something he knew she was the only person he could ask. "Can I just complain?"
He couldn't complain to Ed because his brother always wanted to solve his problems. But Winry knew that even though he was kindhearted, and loving, and patient, that sometimes Al just needed to vent to someone about everything before he could put on his smile and be okay. So he'd just ask and then he could complain without having someone give advice, or sympathy, or judgment. He could give a rant that would put his brother to shame and get nothing more for his trouble than a smirk and a whispered 'give 'em hell' as he was ushered back into the real world outside of their bedroom door.
"Pease," he continued, "Can I just complain? Just this once," though it was never once, it would never be just the once no matter how many times he asked, "And not make anyone sad? No tears, no anger, no brother rushing in to defeat imaginary enemies," he finished with a laugh, which he heard her echo. He was glad, even if her laugh was weak.
"Go ahead, complain."
Just hearing that made him feel better, diminished his need to complain. He imagined smiling, wishing he still had the ability. "There's just so much going on right now, and it's almost too much to keep track of. I want to get help, but brother is refusing. He's being too stubborn this time! We need help! And on top of it all I have even more lies and secrets. I don't want to have to watch people eat and sleep! I don't want to be asked why I'm not having dinner and have to lie again while really I want nothing more than to take a bite. I don't want to stay up all night, every night. I don't want to be lonely again. I don't want to count the minutes to the sunrise; I've had to too many times. I don't want to have to do it again! And brother is being an idiot! We need to accept help and trust other people, but he won't listen to me! I can see how it's affecting him even if he can't. Two days ago he was laughing and happy, and even yesterday he was still lighthearted for most of the day." Al thought back to Ed's dramatic reaction to losing a few inches in height-it was the sort of playful reaction his brother would have in 1922-but now Ed was serious all of the time. The refound stress of the past was grating on him, making him as high-strung as he had been as a teen. "But now he's...so burdened," Al finished in a whisper.
"Then don't listen to him," Winry said as if it was simple. "Ed never knows what's good for him. Whatever he's doing now isn't, so tell him what is. Or better yet, just do it for him." She was quiet just long enough for Al to think of what to say next, but she spoke before he could reply. In a soft voice she said, "And, Al? If a night ever gets too lonely, you can always call here."
He forgot everything he was going to say. How could a suit of armor feel like there was a lump in its throat? Like its mouth was dry? Like its eyes should be wet? "Thanks, Winry," he whispered.
"I'll be there as soon as I can."
"Be sure to call and let me know when you get here so that I can pick you up from the train station."
"Where are you staying?"
"Oh! We're staying with Colonel Mustang-"
"And Ed agreed to that? How did that happen?"
Al laughed. "It was brother's idea actually. We can't stay in the dorms right now, so brother commandeered the Colonel's house."
"That sounds like Ed." Winry sighed. "I suppose the reason you can't stay in the dorms is part of what you have to explain in person.
"Sorry, Win," Al said as he heard a noise behind him. He turned to find Lt. Col. Hughes and the young Roy behind him. He wondered how long it would take to get used to everything, to not expect people to be older, to not be surprised just because someone was alive. "Um, Winry? I should probably go," before I say more than you or them should hear. He turned back to face the phone base. "Thank you for listening."
"Anytime. I'll check the train schedules first thing in the morning and let you know."
"Thank you. Goodnight."
"Goodnight. Be sure to kick Ed awake if he snores too loudly."
"I will." He listened for a few seconds after he heard the click of the line disconnecting. He would have listened longer, cradling the phone that once held her voice, if he hadn't had an audience. He turned back around. The two men were sitting on the couch now. Alphonse sat in the chair across from them. "Where's brother?"
"He said he had something to work on," Roy said.
That could be true, Al thought. Or he needed to get a break from your questions, or seeing Lt. Col. Hughes was too much for him, or he needed a break from seeing you, Roy. Because Al could finally appreciate just how hard it was to be so near someone who looked and sounded like someone you loved, but was still so fundamentally different.
"So how was Miss Rockbell?" Maes asked.
"Good. She'll be coming soon to fix brother's arm. It's okay if she stays here too, right, Roy?"
Roy looked uncertain. "I'm sorry, Al, I'm not sure that I have the room."
"Oh." Al had completely forgotten that they weren't in the same house that Roy and Ed lived in in Central. "Right, you only have the one guest bedroom here... Brother could sleep on the couch or the floor maybe... Or he could share his bed with Winry."
"You don't mind your brother sharing a bed with the girl you love?" Maes asked.
"Of course not," Al said, brushing the question aside. "It's not like they haven't shared a bed before, and brother considers Winry a sister. It wouldn't be weird."
"I think all of us trying to share one guest room might be a little weird, Al," Maes said.
Al ducked his head. "Right."
"I like the plan where Fullmetal has to sleep on the floor," Roy said, perking up.
"I guess Winry and I could get a room in a hotel. There's one near here, isn't there?"
"Not too far, and it's within walking distance of the library so you could get more research done," Roy said.
"That should work then," Al said. It was the perfect solution. Everyone would be more comfortable and Al would have more time with Winry.
"Good, I'm glad that's settled," Maes said. "So, Al, how are you? It can't be easy being tossed to a new point in time."
It's not, I'm not okay, neither is brother. We're tired, and lonely, and scared, and we want to go home!
"It's definitely taking some getting used to, but I think we'll settle back into things soon."
"I'm sure you will. You're both so resilient."
We shouldn't have to be. Haven't we been through enough? Didn't we deserve our happy ending? Didn't we make up even a little for committing the taboo? We saved so many lives, but our equivalent exchange is more trials and hardship?
"Thanks," Al mumbled, ducking his head.
"So Ed teaches at a University, but what do you do in the future?" Maes asked.
"I run an alchemy shop in Risembool. Well, actually people in town just call the house-oh, I live with Granny and Winry-and then I come over and fix whatever is broken. They pay me however they can, with money or food or books, but it's been going well," Al said. "I've gotten people from all over the country come to visit for one reason of another. I guess that's what happens when you're an Elric. So I get to travel still, which is fun. Winry comes sometimes, if she isn't needed in the shop."
"It sounds like you've set yourself up with a pretty good life," Maes said. Him and Roy both wore small smiles. "I'm glad to hear it."
Al looked down at his hands, which were fidgeting in his lap. "Yeah… but that's over now. It was nice while it lasted though." He sighed.
Maes and Roy shared a look before Roy said, "You'll have that again, Al. Both you and Ed will. It might even be easier this time. You know more now than the first time around, right?"
Al shook his head. "We do, but it's complicated. What if we try too hard for a certain result and mess it up?"
"Well what do you have to do? Maybe we can help?" Maes asked.
"I don't really want to talk about it," Al said. Had he said too much already? Personal information like his future career should be fine, right? Just nothing about homunculi or Roy being Ed's boyfriend-though he still didn't think that should be a secret.
"Okay," Roy said, "We could talk about how I'm going to be a Brigadier General in 6 years. Or less?" he trailed off, looking at Al meaningfully.
Al gave a nervous laugh but didn't answer.
"Come on, Roy, I bet things aren't too different for us in the future. The military will always be the military," Maes said. "But Ed and Al must have some exciting stories. You got your bodies back. There's no way that was boring."
"No, it definitely wasn't."
They were all silent for an uncomfortable moment.
"So what do you boys have planned next?" Roy asked. "Or I suppose I should ask what you have planned to change first."
"I think we should wait for brother to talk about that."
"Does he know your plans better than you do?"
"Well, no. I just-"
"Then why wait?" Maes asked.
"We have to be careful what we tell you."
"We just want to help, Al," Maes said, leaning forward. "The more we know, the more we can help."
That was true. It was exactly what Al had been telling Ed since they got here.
"Do you really think it's for the best?" Roy asked. "Do you think secrets are the best course of action? We're all on the same side, and we seem to get along in the future even better than we already do. Do you trust us so little?"
I trust you with my brother, and my life, which is basically the same thing. We'd follow you into hell, we'd give our lives for either of you, for any of you on the team, but-
"I'm not going to tell you," Al said in a calm, steady voice. They knew somehow that he had doubts, they thought- "You think I'm the weak link." It wasn't a question. He knew what they thought, and he let his surprise and hurt show in his voice.
"No, Al, we-"
"Maybe I am," Al interrupted Roy. "I don't agree with keeping secrets, you were right, but I'm still not going to tell you." You might have done better if you'd asked brother, but just one on one. Maybe he would have slipped with Roy the way I did with Winry. Or maybe he would have kept his resolve because you remind him of what he's lost and he's still so angry about it. Maybe we don't have a weak link. "We made a decision, and until we decide otherwise, neither of us are telling you more than we think you need to know. Neither of us are sharing information about the future without the other knowing."
"Al-"
"No, I'm not done." Al snapped. Roy closed his mouth, and he and Maes leaned back more into the couch. "I may not have changed physically to you, but I've grown just as much as my brother. You have to realize that we aren't kids anymore. You have no idea what we've been through. Actually, some of it you do. Brother spent four years in the military, and I was beside him every step of the way. We've known you and your fellow soldiers for years longer than you've known us. You aren't going to trick me into talking."
"We were trying to-" Maes started.
"No! I'm not going to be treated like a kid again. Especially when I'm not even the one who looks younger. We've fought fights you can't even imagine, I was there to see the Fuhrer of Amestris fall, I saw a friend crowned Emperor of Xing, I've befriended and fought alongside the soldiers of Briggs, and I've travelled Creta's countryside. I am not a child, and I deserve your respect."
The silence was so loud that it rang in Al's ears. They were just staring at him. It was so uncomfortable, the silence growing by the second until it was unbearable.
Al cleared his throat. "Right. I um, that's it. I'm done now." He stood up. Both men stood as well, and Roy moved to speak.
But then Ed burst into the room. "What's with the noise?" He asked as he brushed his bangs out of his face.
"Nothing, we were just talking," Al said. "I was just about to join you. We still have to decide exactly what's best for Lior, right?" He started walking towards Ed.
"I-" Roy started.
"So let's go," Al said as he reached Ed.
Ed glanced around Al, unsure. Al imagined he saw the two men still standing by the couch, staring at his back.
"Uh, sure," Ed said before following Al out of the room.
This was one of the things Al would always love about his relationship with his brother. They were always there for each other. They would always have each other's back. They might argue, they would always disagree about something, but they would stand united. Al would try yet again tonight to change Ed's mind about keeping what they know to themselves, and Ed would probably question him about the tension in the air as soon as they were locked in the guest room. But even though they had lost everything and been hurled through time, they weren't alone. They had each other, just as they always had and always would.
Part 1
Part 2
Al had been able to avoid meals so far since returning to his armor, but with Brigadier General Hughes, no Lieutenant Colonel Hughes, no Maes seated at the table he wanted to join them. So he sat next to his brother and watched the others eat, and wondered if Roy's cooking was just as good in 1916 as it was in 1922. Maybe it wasn't and the man had improved with age. He would have to ask his brother later.
"I still can't get over how much you've grown," Maes said to Ed from across the table.
Ed smiled. "You should see my 22 year old body. I feel so weird in this one. It's younger, and shorter, and heavier," he said while patting his automail arm.
"Well I'll get to see that in a few years, right? And Al's too." Maes included Al in his smile.
"We think my body is about 18, so only 4 years from now." Ed sighed wistfully, and Al wondered which feeling he was focusing on more, his longing for his older body or the fact that Lieutenant Colonel Hughes may get to actually see it this time.
"I wonder how old I'll be once we get my body back," Al said.
"You'll be 21, Al, just like I'm still 22," Ed said with a reassuring smile.
"But what about my body? Will it be 17? 15? 21? How will this affect it? Will my muscles be stronger? Weaker? Or the same? And I'll have to go through physical rehabilitation all over again," Al finished with a groan.
He felt a little bad when he saw his brother's forehead wrinkle with concern, but Al had all night to think things through, and there was just so much that was still uncertain, so much they he just did not want to have to redo.
"That's not that bad," Ed said, his concern shining only in his eyes as his mouth formed a wicked grin. "It gives you the perfect excuse to hang all over Winry." He smirked at Al, who knew he would be blushing if he was still made of flesh.
"Why don't you just take out an ad so that you can tell the whole world, brother?!"
"What? Ohh, come on, Hughes doesn't count-"
"Really? Then I'll just tell him about-"
"You wouldn't dare," Ed threatened, voice gruff, as he lunged across the table at Al.
Al jumped up with a laugh, and backed out of the room saying, "I'm going to go call Winry. Someone needs to order you a new arm or you'll never get anything done."
"Yeah yeah, you do that," Ed called after him. As Alphonse walked to the phone he heard the others start on his brother with more questions. Good, if brother wants to keep secrets so badly, then he can handle all of their questions.
Al picked up the phone and began to dial the familiar number, the one that would always mean Winry, and home, and was his own phone number not too long ago. He slammed the phone down. This was the first time that he would be speaking to a Winry that was not the one he saw only days ago. This Winry, the only Winry here, was younger-physically, mentally, emotionally-and probably couldn't even imagine what a 21-year-old Al looked like. She didn't love him the way his Winry did; she saw him as armor, not a future husband.
Hand shaking slightly Al lifted the phone and forced himself to dial. Putting it off wouldn't make the task any more pleasant.
One ring, then another.
Maybe she wouldn't even answer. Maybe Granny would answer and Al could just tell her. But that would be the coward's way out, he should talk to Winry herself. If Granny answered though, then he would at least have an extra couple of minutes to figure out what to say.
Another ring.
"Rockbell Automail, this is Winry speaking."
It was. The voice was slightly higher, but it was Winry, his Winry.
"Hello?"
"Oh um, hi, Winry. It's Al."
"Hi, Al, it's been a while."
Yes it has. It's been more than a day since I've heard you, seen you, held you. Why aren't you here? Better yet, why aren't I there?
"Yeah, I guess it has. We were wondering if maybe you could come visit us in East City."
"What happened? Is Ed okay? What did you're idiot brother do now?"
Al gave a nervous laugh. "Brother's fine. He's just grown a bit and his arms are a little uneven."
"Ed actually grew?"
"Believe it or not," Al said, laughing in earnest this time. "If you can't come here, then we can come to you. We're just in the middle of working on something and were hoping to stay in the city for a bit longer."
"I guess Ed shouldn't be traveling to much on uneven legs anyway," Winry said with a giggle, most likely imaging the same thing as Al: Ed hobbling around with one leg too short.
"Oh no, it's just his arm. His leg is fine."
"How's that? His arm grew but not his leg?"
"Umm." No brother already had an automail leg from the future. It seems to have merged with his past self just as much as the rest of him so it's, luckily, the right length, but he didn't have an automail arm for a bit so that's caused some problems.
Al wanted to tell Winry everything. He didn't want to lie to her, he never lied to her, but he couldn't explain this over the phone. Could he even tell her everything? How could Ed stand being so near and far from Roy for so long when Al couldn't stand a few minutes on the phone?
"Well something happened," Al said. "Sort of. No one's hurt, not really, but it's really complicated. It'd be easier to explain in person."
"But no one is hurt?"
"Right."
"And you just called about Ed's arm?"
"And because I missed you," he said without thinking. He covered his face with his leather hand. Stupid, stupid-
"I miss you too, Al."
With all of the things his armor couldn't feel, Al was just glad that he could still feel the flip of his nonexistent stomach as his nonexistent heart became feather light just from some soft spoken words from Winry.
"You should stay for a while. After you finish brothers arm."
"Really? I thought you guys were busy working."
"No, stay. We'll go to Rush Valley," he said, excited now by his sudden idea.
"Rush Valley! Really? That's the holy land of automail! I'd love to go! I'll have to make a list of parts to get." She let out an unintelligible squeal. "Rush Valley!"
"Actually, I've heard of this really great mechanic that lives there. He doesn't take apprentices, but it couldn't hurt to meet him, right, and see his work?"
"Apprenticeship? I never even thought about that…"
"Well, I'm not saying that you need one-you don't have to take on one-It was just a thought," Al rushed to say. He forgot that Winry didn't want an apprenticeship until she saw Ed's watch. He'd have to be careful not to influence her decisions, but he still though it was a good idea to go to Rush Valley so that Winry could meet Paninya and help deliver the baby.
Winry made a hmm noise that knocked Al out of his thoughts. "So how are you and Granny doing?" He asked, changing the subject.
"We're fine," she said hesitantly. "Nothing's really changed here." She laughed. "You know how it is."
"Yeah," he mumbled. He didn't want to hang up yet. He wanted to stay on the phone, and talk about nothing and everything, and not lose his link to home.
"Are you sure everything is okay, Al? You guys don't call very often."
This was Winry, Winry, his Winry, the girl he could tell everything to, surely he could talk to her about how he was feeling without explaining everything.
"I've just been thinking...what if, what if we're taking on too much. We have so much to do, Winry, and it's just us, and how could we- I, I-"
"Oh, Al..." she said softly. She was quiet for a moment before she said confidently, "There's one thing that I know for sure about you and your brother; you can do anything. Everyone knows that once the Elric brothers put their minds to a goal that they'll see it through."
"I guess..."
"No. Ed's so stubborn that he sees impossible as a challenge, not a limitation. And you're almost as bad, but at least you're smart enough to make sure that you both stay alive. You'll get your bodies back, Al, I'm sure of it."
"I know..." he said before repeating stronger, "I know. It's just... We've already been though so much, and we have so much left now, and- and I can't eat or sleep or... There's no warmth- it's not even cold all the time, it's just nothing. No hot, no cold, no smell or taste, and the nights are so long, and how do you fill that many nights?"
"Al, I- I'm so sorry, I-" she sounded like she was going to cry.
"Winry no, don't-" He hadn't meant to upset her, he just wanted to talk like they always did. So he said something he had said to her dozens of times before, something he hadn't technically ever asked this Winry yet, but something he knew she was the only person he could ask. "Can I just complain?"
He couldn't complain to Ed because his brother always wanted to solve his problems. But Winry knew that even though he was kindhearted, and loving, and patient, that sometimes Al just needed to vent to someone about everything before he could put on his smile and be okay. So he'd just ask and then he could complain without having someone give advice, or sympathy, or judgment. He could give a rant that would put his brother to shame and get nothing more for his trouble than a smirk and a whispered 'give 'em hell' as he was ushered back into the real world outside of their bedroom door.
"Pease," he continued, "Can I just complain? Just this once," though it was never once, it would never be just the once no matter how many times he asked, "And not make anyone sad? No tears, no anger, no brother rushing in to defeat imaginary enemies," he finished with a laugh, which he heard her echo. He was glad, even if her laugh was weak.
"Go ahead, complain."
Just hearing that made him feel better, diminished his need to complain. He imagined smiling, wishing he still had the ability. "There's just so much going on right now, and it's almost too much to keep track of. I want to get help, but brother is refusing. He's being too stubborn this time! We need help! And on top of it all I have even more lies and secrets. I don't want to have to watch people eat and sleep! I don't want to be asked why I'm not having dinner and have to lie again while really I want nothing more than to take a bite. I don't want to stay up all night, every night. I don't want to be lonely again. I don't want to count the minutes to the sunrise; I've had to too many times. I don't want to have to do it again! And brother is being an idiot! We need to accept help and trust other people, but he won't listen to me! I can see how it's affecting him even if he can't. Two days ago he was laughing and happy, and even yesterday he was still lighthearted for most of the day." Al thought back to Ed's dramatic reaction to losing a few inches in height-it was the sort of playful reaction his brother would have in 1922-but now Ed was serious all of the time. The refound stress of the past was grating on him, making him as high-strung as he had been as a teen. "But now he's...so burdened," Al finished in a whisper.
"Then don't listen to him," Winry said as if it was simple. "Ed never knows what's good for him. Whatever he's doing now isn't, so tell him what is. Or better yet, just do it for him." She was quiet just long enough for Al to think of what to say next, but she spoke before he could reply. In a soft voice she said, "And, Al? If a night ever gets too lonely, you can always call here."
He forgot everything he was going to say. How could a suit of armor feel like there was a lump in its throat? Like its mouth was dry? Like its eyes should be wet? "Thanks, Winry," he whispered.
"I'll be there as soon as I can."
"Be sure to call and let me know when you get here so that I can pick you up from the train station."
"Where are you staying?"
"Oh! We're staying with Colonel Mustang-"
"And Ed agreed to that? How did that happen?"
Al laughed. "It was brother's idea actually. We can't stay in the dorms right now, so brother commandeered the Colonel's house."
"That sounds like Ed." Winry sighed. "I suppose the reason you can't stay in the dorms is part of what you have to explain in person.
"Sorry, Win," Al said as he heard a noise behind him. He turned to find Lt. Col. Hughes and the young Roy behind him. He wondered how long it would take to get used to everything, to not expect people to be older, to not be surprised just because someone was alive. "Um, Winry? I should probably go," before I say more than you or them should hear. He turned back to face the phone base. "Thank you for listening."
"Anytime. I'll check the train schedules first thing in the morning and let you know."
"Thank you. Goodnight."
"Goodnight. Be sure to kick Ed awake if he snores too loudly."
"I will." He listened for a few seconds after he heard the click of the line disconnecting. He would have listened longer, cradling the phone that once held her voice, if he hadn't had an audience. He turned back around. The two men were sitting on the couch now. Alphonse sat in the chair across from them. "Where's brother?"
"He said he had something to work on," Roy said.
That could be true, Al thought. Or he needed to get a break from your questions, or seeing Lt. Col. Hughes was too much for him, or he needed a break from seeing you, Roy. Because Al could finally appreciate just how hard it was to be so near someone who looked and sounded like someone you loved, but was still so fundamentally different.
"So how was Miss Rockbell?" Maes asked.
"Good. She'll be coming soon to fix brother's arm. It's okay if she stays here too, right, Roy?"
Roy looked uncertain. "I'm sorry, Al, I'm not sure that I have the room."
"Oh." Al had completely forgotten that they weren't in the same house that Roy and Ed lived in in Central. "Right, you only have the one guest bedroom here... Brother could sleep on the couch or the floor maybe... Or he could share his bed with Winry."
"You don't mind your brother sharing a bed with the girl you love?" Maes asked.
"Of course not," Al said, brushing the question aside. "It's not like they haven't shared a bed before, and brother considers Winry a sister. It wouldn't be weird."
"I think all of us trying to share one guest room might be a little weird, Al," Maes said.
Al ducked his head. "Right."
"I like the plan where Fullmetal has to sleep on the floor," Roy said, perking up.
"I guess Winry and I could get a room in a hotel. There's one near here, isn't there?"
"Not too far, and it's within walking distance of the library so you could get more research done," Roy said.
"That should work then," Al said. It was the perfect solution. Everyone would be more comfortable and Al would have more time with Winry.
"Good, I'm glad that's settled," Maes said. "So, Al, how are you? It can't be easy being tossed to a new point in time."
It's not, I'm not okay, neither is brother. We're tired, and lonely, and scared, and we want to go home!
"It's definitely taking some getting used to, but I think we'll settle back into things soon."
"I'm sure you will. You're both so resilient."
We shouldn't have to be. Haven't we been through enough? Didn't we deserve our happy ending? Didn't we make up even a little for committing the taboo? We saved so many lives, but our equivalent exchange is more trials and hardship?
"Thanks," Al mumbled, ducking his head.
"So Ed teaches at a University, but what do you do in the future?" Maes asked.
"I run an alchemy shop in Risembool. Well, actually people in town just call the house-oh, I live with Granny and Winry-and then I come over and fix whatever is broken. They pay me however they can, with money or food or books, but it's been going well," Al said. "I've gotten people from all over the country come to visit for one reason of another. I guess that's what happens when you're an Elric. So I get to travel still, which is fun. Winry comes sometimes, if she isn't needed in the shop."
"It sounds like you've set yourself up with a pretty good life," Maes said. Him and Roy both wore small smiles. "I'm glad to hear it."
Al looked down at his hands, which were fidgeting in his lap. "Yeah… but that's over now. It was nice while it lasted though." He sighed.
Maes and Roy shared a look before Roy said, "You'll have that again, Al. Both you and Ed will. It might even be easier this time. You know more now than the first time around, right?"
Al shook his head. "We do, but it's complicated. What if we try too hard for a certain result and mess it up?"
"Well what do you have to do? Maybe we can help?" Maes asked.
"I don't really want to talk about it," Al said. Had he said too much already? Personal information like his future career should be fine, right? Just nothing about homunculi or Roy being Ed's boyfriend-though he still didn't think that should be a secret.
"Okay," Roy said, "We could talk about how I'm going to be a Brigadier General in 6 years. Or less?" he trailed off, looking at Al meaningfully.
Al gave a nervous laugh but didn't answer.
"Come on, Roy, I bet things aren't too different for us in the future. The military will always be the military," Maes said. "But Ed and Al must have some exciting stories. You got your bodies back. There's no way that was boring."
"No, it definitely wasn't."
They were all silent for an uncomfortable moment.
"So what do you boys have planned next?" Roy asked. "Or I suppose I should ask what you have planned to change first."
"I think we should wait for brother to talk about that."
"Does he know your plans better than you do?"
"Well, no. I just-"
"Then why wait?" Maes asked.
"We have to be careful what we tell you."
"We just want to help, Al," Maes said, leaning forward. "The more we know, the more we can help."
That was true. It was exactly what Al had been telling Ed since they got here.
"Do you really think it's for the best?" Roy asked. "Do you think secrets are the best course of action? We're all on the same side, and we seem to get along in the future even better than we already do. Do you trust us so little?"
I trust you with my brother, and my life, which is basically the same thing. We'd follow you into hell, we'd give our lives for either of you, for any of you on the team, but-
"I'm not going to tell you," Al said in a calm, steady voice. They knew somehow that he had doubts, they thought- "You think I'm the weak link." It wasn't a question. He knew what they thought, and he let his surprise and hurt show in his voice.
"No, Al, we-"
"Maybe I am," Al interrupted Roy. "I don't agree with keeping secrets, you were right, but I'm still not going to tell you." You might have done better if you'd asked brother, but just one on one. Maybe he would have slipped with Roy the way I did with Winry. Or maybe he would have kept his resolve because you remind him of what he's lost and he's still so angry about it. Maybe we don't have a weak link. "We made a decision, and until we decide otherwise, neither of us are telling you more than we think you need to know. Neither of us are sharing information about the future without the other knowing."
"Al-"
"No, I'm not done." Al snapped. Roy closed his mouth, and he and Maes leaned back more into the couch. "I may not have changed physically to you, but I've grown just as much as my brother. You have to realize that we aren't kids anymore. You have no idea what we've been through. Actually, some of it you do. Brother spent four years in the military, and I was beside him every step of the way. We've known you and your fellow soldiers for years longer than you've known us. You aren't going to trick me into talking."
"We were trying to-" Maes started.
"No! I'm not going to be treated like a kid again. Especially when I'm not even the one who looks younger. We've fought fights you can't even imagine, I was there to see the Fuhrer of Amestris fall, I saw a friend crowned Emperor of Xing, I've befriended and fought alongside the soldiers of Briggs, and I've travelled Creta's countryside. I am not a child, and I deserve your respect."
The silence was so loud that it rang in Al's ears. They were just staring at him. It was so uncomfortable, the silence growing by the second until it was unbearable.
Al cleared his throat. "Right. I um, that's it. I'm done now." He stood up. Both men stood as well, and Roy moved to speak.
But then Ed burst into the room. "What's with the noise?" He asked as he brushed his bangs out of his face.
"Nothing, we were just talking," Al said. "I was just about to join you. We still have to decide exactly what's best for Lior, right?" He started walking towards Ed.
"I-" Roy started.
"So let's go," Al said as he reached Ed.
Ed glanced around Al, unsure. Al imagined he saw the two men still standing by the couch, staring at his back.
"Uh, sure," Ed said before following Al out of the room.
This was one of the things Al would always love about his relationship with his brother. They were always there for each other. They would always have each other's back. They might argue, they would always disagree about something, but they would stand united. Al would try yet again tonight to change Ed's mind about keeping what they know to themselves, and Ed would probably question him about the tension in the air as soon as they were locked in the guest room. But even though they had lost everything and been hurled through time, they weren't alone. They had each other, just as they always had and always would.