Reason Ch 8
Title: Reason Ch 8
Author: limnological
Rating: PG
Pairing: YoonYul
Description: AU, painters!YoonYul
Chapter 8
Yoona noticed what Yuri was about to do.
She just chose not to say anything and she guesses it’s a mutual agreement since they don’t talk about it the day after.
But it still bugs her.
Was Yuri about to kiss her?
She knows she likes Yuri, but she doesn’t know how the older girl feels.
If Yuri was about to kiss her, then it was some sort of indication that she felt the same way, right?
Of course it would be, but that thought just leads Yoona back to square one.
She’s not even sure if Yuri was about to kiss her.
It troubles her, but she figures now is not the right time to talk about it considering the art show is next Friday.
And when she updates Key about everything that has gone on between her and Yuri, she expects him to throw, “Ha! I knew you liked her!” in her face or mock her in some way, but he doesn’t.
“So when are you going to tell her?”
“After the art show? I don’t want things to become awkward while we work together if she doesn’t feel the same way.”
“Alright, I’ll hold you to that.”
--
Yoona blows out a tired breath as she stretches. She looks up at the painting, satisfied with what she sees. In it, there is a group of white shiny pearls under the sea. But somewhere hidden in there is a black pearl and that’s what Yoona had planned. It was her hidden black pearl.
“What do you think?”
Yuri grins, applauding softly.
“It’s wonderful. You’re going to do great tomorrow.”
--
Many foreigners, experts, and students attend the art show. They come in, looking leisurely at the artworks displayed, but many stop and stare at Yoona’s for awhile. She feels proud and giddy when they do so. When Taemin and Key show up, she smiles brightly at them.
“Hey!”
“Hi noona. We came to see your painting!” Taemin looks around. “Which one is it?”
“Come with me, I’ll show you.”
Professor Park is standing near with a man, watching the scene unfold.
“That’s Im Yoona, the artist of the painting you fancy.” Yuri walks by and Professor Park beckons to her. “Oh, Yuri, please come over here.”
Yuri does so and greets the Professor politely.
“Hello, Professor.”
“This is Kwon Yuri, Im Yoona’s mentor. And Yuri, this is Jang Wooyoung, a friend of mine from Paris. He’s interested in Yoona’s art.”
They exchange greetings. “I was just telling him how brilliant of a teacher you are. Yoona has definitely improved over the time she studied under you.”
Yuri just shakes her head modestly.
“She is an excellent student with a lot of potential and talent. I didn’t do much - it was all her.”
Wooyoung laughs heartily.
“You’re quite modest. So tell me about Yoona.”
“She’s a hard worker, determined and not afraid to learn and adapt. If you just push her in the right direction, she can produce masterpieces of her own, just like that painting over there.”
“That’s wonderful to hear. Thank you. I will definitely give her an offer then.”
Yuri’s ears perk up at the word ‘offer.’
Professor Park smiles.
“An offer?”
He nods.
“My grandparents will definitely love to see more works produced by her. And I’m sure she would love to see Paris while working for them.”
Yuri has a bittersweet smile.
--
Yuri finds her way to the fountain outside the art show and takes a seat on the ledge for a moment to breathe. The gallery was feeling a bit stuffy. She was right about Yoona being requested by a foreigner. It’s an amazing opportunity and Yoona should take it.
Which means Yuri won’t be able to see her anymore.
She lets out a sigh and then notices the flow of water playing softly in her ear. She twists her body slightly to the left, glancing down at the pennies thrown at the bottom of the fountain. A bittersweet smile forms on her face.
Pennies will always remind her of Yoona.
“Hey.”
Yuri snaps out of her thoughts, looking up to see Yoona standing in front of her.
“Hi.” Yuri smiles softly at her. “I knew you would do great.”
“Thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you.” Yoona does not take a seat and still stands in front of her. “Listen…” Her voice becomes quiet. “There’s something I have to tell you.”
Yuri knows what she will say next and she doesn’t want to hear it, to acknowledge it, because it will be that much harder to let her go to Paris.
“I like you.”
The statement makes her happy, it really does. But at the same time, it rips her heart open, allowing memories of her past relationship to flood back into her mind. The difficulty of a long distance relationship was beyond hard. She wants to reciprocate, to tell the truth about her feelings, but Wooyoung’s offer about Paris replays in her mind. He must not have made the offer yet, because if he did, she doubts Yoona would still confess.
No, she cannot be selfish. She can’t let Yoona go through the hardships of a long distance relationship.
“…Yoona, we can’t.”
Yuri’s not sure what hurts more - knowing that she caused the hurt on Yoona’s face or the fact that she is hurting over a lie. She can’t look at her, so she casts her eyes downward, staring at the ground. And she hopes that Yoona will not ask why or she may just break.
She’s not sure if she should be thankful to God when Yoona does not say anymore and ends up running away.
And Yuri is left wondering what hurts less - being rejected before possible heartaches during a relationship or going through that relationship with all the heartache thrown in.
--
It was rejection and she feels crummy, but it’s not the end of the world.
At least, she tries not to think of it as being the end of the world.
Yoona looks down at the business card, replaying her conversation with Jang Wooyoung last night.
She’s always wanted to go to Paris.
--
When Yuri enters her art studio, she’s surprised to see Yoona standing by the unfinished paintings. Yoona quickly turns to look at her with an apologetic face.
“Sorry I - I wanted to see this place one more time. Seohyun let me in.”
Yuri shakes her head and slowly walks over to stand next to her.
“It’s alright.”
An awkward silence falls over them and Yoona hates it. They both keep their eyes on the unfinished beach painting.
“… I wanted to tell you that I’m going to Paris.”
“Congrats.”
It comes out a little shaky and Yoona catches it.
“When are you leaving?”
A pang hits her chest at the question.
“In three days.”
“I’m happy for you. You’re going to become a great artist.”
Yoona’s heart aches more at the fact that Yuri has not asked her how long she will be gone as if she didn’t care. They stand in silence, looking at the painting before them.
“Thank you for everything.”
The conversation is too formal for them and it makes Yoona frustrated.
“You as well.”
So frustrated.
--
Three days pass slowly as she says her goodbyes to her professors and friends one by one. The weather seems to mirror her mood as the rain spills from the sky. Key is the last person she decides to see before her flight tomorrow. They’re sitting indoors, in the lounge area of their dormitory.
“She rejected you?”
Key has this appalled look on his face.
Yoona just nods meekly, frown evident.
“Yeah, she said, ‘we can’t.’”
“But she likes you! She tried to kiss you, didn’t she?”
“Sorta? I don’t even know. Maybe I was imagining it.”
Key’s quiet for awhile and then he explodes, upset.
“’We can’t?’ What kind of response is that?”
“I don’t know.” Yoona ruffles her own hair in frustration. “Maybe she would have said more if I hadn’t ran away.”
“Wait, you ran away?”
Yoona blushes.
“What did you expect me to do? Linger around for more hurt?”
“But that means you didn’t even get to hear how she feels about you.”
“What do you mean? It’s clear she doesn’t feel the same way. She said ‘we can’t!’”
“Yoona, why did she say ‘we can’t’ instead of telling you something like ‘I don’t like you like that.’? Think about why she would choose those words instead. Couldn’t there be a reason behind that?”
Key’s logic processes in her head and it gives her hope when she shouldn’t have any. She bites her lip.
“…It doesn’t matter. I’m going to Paris tomorrow.”
“It does matter. You need to find out or you’ll always wonder. You’ll go to Paris and think back on it, an answer never clear.”
Key was right.
Hell, he is always right.
What exactly was she to Kwon Yuri? The thought sends her jumping off the couch and heading to the door.
She needs to know before she leaves.
--
Yuri is met with a surprise at her doorstep after Seohyun tells her she has a guest.
“Yoona? You’re soaking wet!” Yuri pulls her inside, shutting the door behind them. “Let me get you a towel.” Yuri turns to leave, but Yoona grabs the end of her shirt, stopping her.
“Stay.”
Yuri looks at her, confused.
“Yoona?”
“Please… tell me….” Her grip on Yuri’s shirt tightens. “That night - that night you took me out, what were you going to do before I woke up?”
Yuri’s jaw tightens and she does not answer. The thunder outside rumbles throughout the sky as Yoona struggles to say her next sentence.
“What am I to you?”
“Yoona…”
Oh no. The pent up feelings were threatening to spill.
“Am I just your student?”
She steps closer and Yuri steps backwards in return.
“Just someone who inspired you?”
They move again.
“Just a friend?”
Yuri’s backed up against a wall now.
“What am I?”
She’s losing control.
“Damn it, Yoona.”
In one swift motion, Yuri’s lips crash onto hers. It’s a desperate kiss, one full of angst and passion and everything in between. When they part, Yuri whispers so softly to her that Yoona has to strain her ears to hear it.
“You can’t expect me to pretend it’s not there when you’re begging me like this.”
“I never wanted you to pretend.”
Yoona leans in for another kiss, but it only causes Yuri to turn her head away, eyes closed.
“We can’t.”
“Why?”
Yuri whispers her next words harshly, voice straining.
“Do you know how hard it is? How hard it is to not be able to be physically near your love? How hard it is to not be able to hold them, to kiss them? To trust? To keep communication? It’s not easy, Yoona. I don’t want you to go through that kind of pain.”
And it’s then that Yoona understands the hesitation, the frustration. She soaks in the information as the rain patters against the windows. Yoona shakes her head and then brings up her left hand to gently turn Yuri’s face back to face her.
“You can’t decide that for me. I would still like to give it a try, Yuri.”
Yuri scans her face, confusion clouding her eyes.
“Aren’t you afraid? Afraid that I won't...I chose passion over love before, what if -“
Yuri averts her gaze and doesn’t say anymore. Yoona understands she’s talking about her past relationship and her choice.
“I don’t care that you chose passion over love. I don’t care because that was in the past. What matters is your choice now, in the present. Tell me, if you were given the choice of love or passion, what would you choose right now?”
And it clicks in Yuri’s head. Jessica was right - right here, right now she isn’t the past her.
“…Love.”
“Then just love me.”
Yoona kisses her again, with a little more force than their first.
“Or tell me; tell me that you don’t want this and I’ll stop.”
It’s whispered in between more kisses.
“Tell me that you don’t feel the same.”
Yoona’s left hand latches onto her shoulder blade, thumb pressing against collarbone.
“That you don’t want me.”
She kisses her again, gentler.
“Tell me.”
Yuri looks at the girl before her. She’s so naïve, so innocent, and so willing. But she guesses that’s part of her attraction. Yuri presses her forehead against the younger girl.
“…It’s not going to be easy.”
“I don’t care. As long as it’s you.”
Yuri smiles, taking in all her features, faults, and allures - foolishness being dominant right now. But it’s okay because this fool was hers.
Author: limnological
Rating: PG
Pairing: YoonYul
Description: AU, painters!YoonYul
Chapter 8
Yoona noticed what Yuri was about to do.
She just chose not to say anything and she guesses it’s a mutual agreement since they don’t talk about it the day after.
But it still bugs her.
Was Yuri about to kiss her?
She knows she likes Yuri, but she doesn’t know how the older girl feels.
If Yuri was about to kiss her, then it was some sort of indication that she felt the same way, right?
Of course it would be, but that thought just leads Yoona back to square one.
She’s not even sure if Yuri was about to kiss her.
It troubles her, but she figures now is not the right time to talk about it considering the art show is next Friday.
And when she updates Key about everything that has gone on between her and Yuri, she expects him to throw, “Ha! I knew you liked her!” in her face or mock her in some way, but he doesn’t.
“So when are you going to tell her?”
“After the art show? I don’t want things to become awkward while we work together if she doesn’t feel the same way.”
“Alright, I’ll hold you to that.”
--
Yoona blows out a tired breath as she stretches. She looks up at the painting, satisfied with what she sees. In it, there is a group of white shiny pearls under the sea. But somewhere hidden in there is a black pearl and that’s what Yoona had planned. It was her hidden black pearl.
“What do you think?”
Yuri grins, applauding softly.
“It’s wonderful. You’re going to do great tomorrow.”
--
Many foreigners, experts, and students attend the art show. They come in, looking leisurely at the artworks displayed, but many stop and stare at Yoona’s for awhile. She feels proud and giddy when they do so. When Taemin and Key show up, she smiles brightly at them.
“Hey!”
“Hi noona. We came to see your painting!” Taemin looks around. “Which one is it?”
“Come with me, I’ll show you.”
Professor Park is standing near with a man, watching the scene unfold.
“That’s Im Yoona, the artist of the painting you fancy.” Yuri walks by and Professor Park beckons to her. “Oh, Yuri, please come over here.”
Yuri does so and greets the Professor politely.
“Hello, Professor.”
“This is Kwon Yuri, Im Yoona’s mentor. And Yuri, this is Jang Wooyoung, a friend of mine from Paris. He’s interested in Yoona’s art.”
They exchange greetings. “I was just telling him how brilliant of a teacher you are. Yoona has definitely improved over the time she studied under you.”
Yuri just shakes her head modestly.
“She is an excellent student with a lot of potential and talent. I didn’t do much - it was all her.”
Wooyoung laughs heartily.
“You’re quite modest. So tell me about Yoona.”
“She’s a hard worker, determined and not afraid to learn and adapt. If you just push her in the right direction, she can produce masterpieces of her own, just like that painting over there.”
“That’s wonderful to hear. Thank you. I will definitely give her an offer then.”
Yuri’s ears perk up at the word ‘offer.’
Professor Park smiles.
“An offer?”
He nods.
“My grandparents will definitely love to see more works produced by her. And I’m sure she would love to see Paris while working for them.”
Yuri has a bittersweet smile.
--
Yuri finds her way to the fountain outside the art show and takes a seat on the ledge for a moment to breathe. The gallery was feeling a bit stuffy. She was right about Yoona being requested by a foreigner. It’s an amazing opportunity and Yoona should take it.
Which means Yuri won’t be able to see her anymore.
She lets out a sigh and then notices the flow of water playing softly in her ear. She twists her body slightly to the left, glancing down at the pennies thrown at the bottom of the fountain. A bittersweet smile forms on her face.
Pennies will always remind her of Yoona.
“Hey.”
Yuri snaps out of her thoughts, looking up to see Yoona standing in front of her.
“Hi.” Yuri smiles softly at her. “I knew you would do great.”
“Thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you.” Yoona does not take a seat and still stands in front of her. “Listen…” Her voice becomes quiet. “There’s something I have to tell you.”
Yuri knows what she will say next and she doesn’t want to hear it, to acknowledge it, because it will be that much harder to let her go to Paris.
“I like you.”
The statement makes her happy, it really does. But at the same time, it rips her heart open, allowing memories of her past relationship to flood back into her mind. The difficulty of a long distance relationship was beyond hard. She wants to reciprocate, to tell the truth about her feelings, but Wooyoung’s offer about Paris replays in her mind. He must not have made the offer yet, because if he did, she doubts Yoona would still confess.
No, she cannot be selfish. She can’t let Yoona go through the hardships of a long distance relationship.
“…Yoona, we can’t.”
Yuri’s not sure what hurts more - knowing that she caused the hurt on Yoona’s face or the fact that she is hurting over a lie. She can’t look at her, so she casts her eyes downward, staring at the ground. And she hopes that Yoona will not ask why or she may just break.
She’s not sure if she should be thankful to God when Yoona does not say anymore and ends up running away.
And Yuri is left wondering what hurts less - being rejected before possible heartaches during a relationship or going through that relationship with all the heartache thrown in.
--
It was rejection and she feels crummy, but it’s not the end of the world.
At least, she tries not to think of it as being the end of the world.
Yoona looks down at the business card, replaying her conversation with Jang Wooyoung last night.
She’s always wanted to go to Paris.
--
When Yuri enters her art studio, she’s surprised to see Yoona standing by the unfinished paintings. Yoona quickly turns to look at her with an apologetic face.
“Sorry I - I wanted to see this place one more time. Seohyun let me in.”
Yuri shakes her head and slowly walks over to stand next to her.
“It’s alright.”
An awkward silence falls over them and Yoona hates it. They both keep their eyes on the unfinished beach painting.
“… I wanted to tell you that I’m going to Paris.”
“Congrats.”
It comes out a little shaky and Yoona catches it.
“When are you leaving?”
A pang hits her chest at the question.
“In three days.”
“I’m happy for you. You’re going to become a great artist.”
Yoona’s heart aches more at the fact that Yuri has not asked her how long she will be gone as if she didn’t care. They stand in silence, looking at the painting before them.
“Thank you for everything.”
The conversation is too formal for them and it makes Yoona frustrated.
“You as well.”
So frustrated.
--
Three days pass slowly as she says her goodbyes to her professors and friends one by one. The weather seems to mirror her mood as the rain spills from the sky. Key is the last person she decides to see before her flight tomorrow. They’re sitting indoors, in the lounge area of their dormitory.
“She rejected you?”
Key has this appalled look on his face.
Yoona just nods meekly, frown evident.
“Yeah, she said, ‘we can’t.’”
“But she likes you! She tried to kiss you, didn’t she?”
“Sorta? I don’t even know. Maybe I was imagining it.”
Key’s quiet for awhile and then he explodes, upset.
“’We can’t?’ What kind of response is that?”
“I don’t know.” Yoona ruffles her own hair in frustration. “Maybe she would have said more if I hadn’t ran away.”
“Wait, you ran away?”
Yoona blushes.
“What did you expect me to do? Linger around for more hurt?”
“But that means you didn’t even get to hear how she feels about you.”
“What do you mean? It’s clear she doesn’t feel the same way. She said ‘we can’t!’”
“Yoona, why did she say ‘we can’t’ instead of telling you something like ‘I don’t like you like that.’? Think about why she would choose those words instead. Couldn’t there be a reason behind that?”
Key’s logic processes in her head and it gives her hope when she shouldn’t have any. She bites her lip.
“…It doesn’t matter. I’m going to Paris tomorrow.”
“It does matter. You need to find out or you’ll always wonder. You’ll go to Paris and think back on it, an answer never clear.”
Key was right.
Hell, he is always right.
What exactly was she to Kwon Yuri? The thought sends her jumping off the couch and heading to the door.
She needs to know before she leaves.
--
Yuri is met with a surprise at her doorstep after Seohyun tells her she has a guest.
“Yoona? You’re soaking wet!” Yuri pulls her inside, shutting the door behind them. “Let me get you a towel.” Yuri turns to leave, but Yoona grabs the end of her shirt, stopping her.
“Stay.”
Yuri looks at her, confused.
“Yoona?”
“Please… tell me….” Her grip on Yuri’s shirt tightens. “That night - that night you took me out, what were you going to do before I woke up?”
Yuri’s jaw tightens and she does not answer. The thunder outside rumbles throughout the sky as Yoona struggles to say her next sentence.
“What am I to you?”
“Yoona…”
Oh no. The pent up feelings were threatening to spill.
“Am I just your student?”
She steps closer and Yuri steps backwards in return.
“Just someone who inspired you?”
They move again.
“Just a friend?”
Yuri’s backed up against a wall now.
“What am I?”
She’s losing control.
“Damn it, Yoona.”
In one swift motion, Yuri’s lips crash onto hers. It’s a desperate kiss, one full of angst and passion and everything in between. When they part, Yuri whispers so softly to her that Yoona has to strain her ears to hear it.
“You can’t expect me to pretend it’s not there when you’re begging me like this.”
“I never wanted you to pretend.”
Yoona leans in for another kiss, but it only causes Yuri to turn her head away, eyes closed.
“We can’t.”
“Why?”
Yuri whispers her next words harshly, voice straining.
“Do you know how hard it is? How hard it is to not be able to be physically near your love? How hard it is to not be able to hold them, to kiss them? To trust? To keep communication? It’s not easy, Yoona. I don’t want you to go through that kind of pain.”
And it’s then that Yoona understands the hesitation, the frustration. She soaks in the information as the rain patters against the windows. Yoona shakes her head and then brings up her left hand to gently turn Yuri’s face back to face her.
“You can’t decide that for me. I would still like to give it a try, Yuri.”
Yuri scans her face, confusion clouding her eyes.
“Aren’t you afraid? Afraid that I won't...I chose passion over love before, what if -“
Yuri averts her gaze and doesn’t say anymore. Yoona understands she’s talking about her past relationship and her choice.
“I don’t care that you chose passion over love. I don’t care because that was in the past. What matters is your choice now, in the present. Tell me, if you were given the choice of love or passion, what would you choose right now?”
And it clicks in Yuri’s head. Jessica was right - right here, right now she isn’t the past her.
“…Love.”
“Then just love me.”
Yoona kisses her again, with a little more force than their first.
“Or tell me; tell me that you don’t want this and I’ll stop.”
It’s whispered in between more kisses.
“Tell me that you don’t feel the same.”
Yoona’s left hand latches onto her shoulder blade, thumb pressing against collarbone.
“That you don’t want me.”
She kisses her again, gentler.
“Tell me.”
Yuri looks at the girl before her. She’s so naïve, so innocent, and so willing. But she guesses that’s part of her attraction. Yuri presses her forehead against the younger girl.
“…It’s not going to be easy.”
“I don’t care. As long as it’s you.”
Yuri smiles, taking in all her features, faults, and allures - foolishness being dominant right now. But it’s okay because this fool was hers.