20 American Dollars

[little_emo_boy]

I think I'm sick. I can't stop sleeping, and when I'm awake it feels like I've got a rat in my stomach, a rat with a propeller on the end of his nose. Not only does he like to scratch at the walls of my stomach, he also loves to fly around in there too.

I drew up this scientific diagram for the lay-people to understand me better.

Comments

Nurse Lacey to the rescue!

[laceybeans]

The Propeller-Rat is a very serious condition. I remember running into them before in my nursing studies. Ahhhh yes, here it is. My professional nursing book says that to train the average Propeller-Rat, one must consume foods that keep the rat drowsy and/or satisfied. Suggested drowsy drinks: kava-kava root tea made with soymilk and a little honey, or chicken noodle soup. Suggested satisfying foods: Green and red cabbage, steamed brocolli, or raw cauliflower. Glad to be here for friends!

Re: Nurse Lacey to the rescue!

[little_emo_boy]

The rat ended up going away when I drank a lot of beer ... I know you accidentally left beer off the list, I'll forgive you this time.

[purple_stan]

108%? my friends are only 81% normal. :(

[hit_the_leland]

Now that the rat is out of your body, is it for sale?

[the_armadillo]

That is by FAR the cutest propeller-rat I've ever seen. The rat in my stomach is made entirely of acid. He's ugly and mean and he eats holes in me. I'd feel a little better if he had big button eyes like that.