truth? too many quotes, so little time

[lizmarie]

I've been thinking a lot lately about honesty. How honest am I, really? I try to be honest and open with my students, though it's not always possible. Still, when they ask me questions I try to answer as clearly and honestly as I can, and I try to be unbiased if possible. If I don't know something I say so

Comments

[bandicoot]

I think that kind of honesty - that of demanding that your writing be totally representative of yourself - is not obtainable. We're far too multidimensional to reduce us to mere words

[lizmarie]

There is too much to life to try to capture it and write it down. I doubt most of us even come close.

I try not to while, too. If I do feel like I need to complain about something I try to keep it light. Nobody wants to read constant venting. Those are the people I delete from my friends list. I find depression hard to believe. I think that being happy is a choice.

[lizmarie]

How do you feel then, when you look back on things? Do you regert things you say or write? Or do you feel satisfied with yourself for being honest?

I always think before I speak, and the words usually come out wrong, anyway. I'm sure there's a lesson in that. ;)

[grammardog]

Interesting question.

I suspect that MOST people don't write everything that's on their minds, at least not publicly. Certain events involving people that read my journal are often written about in a private entry, or not at all. Also, there's a weird perception of Normal in the world, and we're all working pretty hard to conform to it, whether we like that idea or not. For a LOT of people, that means hiding feelings of despair, depression, confusion, loss and anger, because what fun is that stuff? The sun always shines on TV...

This IS a journal, but it's mostly a forum. I don't really think it's an issue of honesty to not reveal certain things here. I've seen the occasional person do it, and it seems mostly raw and sort of hurtful. Most of us trust only our closest friends to know us well, to know our ins and outs. Everyone else can just guess. :)

[lizmarie]

I guess it's folly to think that anyone reading my journal is going to really know me. I find it bizarre that people can fall in love online. How could the possibly know?

I think that feelings are often a choice. I don't try to hide my feelings when I'm upset or angry, but try to actively change them. There's a definite dichotomy here between people who share their unhappiness and people who don't.

Re:

[grammardog]

I definitely think people can become friends online, and care for one another. As in REAL life, it all depends on how forthcoming you are about yourself, how much you're willing to share with someone, what your expectations are, and how sharp your communication skills are. I've made some great friends online, and no one was more surprised about that than me.

It's funny that you said that, about feelings being a choice. I'd been thinking about that only hours before you said it. I don't really believe feelings are a choice, but I do think that your response to them (i.e. dwelling, moping, etc) is a choice. That having been said, I don't think it's a weakness to mope or dwell for some time... sometimes it's as brave an act to be unhappy for a while as it is to try to bring yourself out of it.

Not that I think YOU'RE doing one thing or the other... just musing. :)

absolutely i consider it

[sosiouxme]

especially since people i know IRL read my journal or might read it. no one is ever completely honest, even with themselves.

Re: absolutely i consider it

[lizmarie]

Few people I know in "real life" read this journal (that I know of?) but I still think about it. I don't know how honest other people are with themselves.

The mind is a powerful thing.

[dew]

Total honesty? May be a pipe dream. I write what I'm feeling with little editing. I hold back very little. And I'm brutally honest with my comments.

[lizmarie]

Ouch, brutal honesty! ;)

Re:

[dew]

Damn straight!