lookee!
Title: Nice
Author: llaras
Fandom: Firefly
Pairing: Jayne/Wash
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: Joss doesn't mind.
Notes: Written for ru_salki99 in this year's washathon. The request was for kissing, no angst and Wash and Zoe not being married. This is set pre-series. Approx 1200 words. Much love to quiesce for the beta!
Summary: Mal asks Wash to keep Jayne busy.
It seemed like Wash always got stuck with the stuff no one else wanted to do.
"Are you kidding me?"
"Sit on him or something. We don't have time to mess around in town on this trip and I don't trust Jayne to stay in the hotel."
"Well, how the hell am I supposed to keep him here?"
"I don't know, challenge him to a game." Mal indicated the chessboard set up on a table next to the fireplace.
"Really."
"Cards, then. Or ask him about one of his guns. It's your problem now, you'll figure something out."
"Great."
Zoe poked her head around the doorframe of the private dining room, ignoring Wash completely. "Mal, it's time."
"Two hours, tops, and then we'll be back. Just keep Jayne here and away from the whorehouse. We may need to leave in a hurry and I'm not going looking for him."
"Why can't you take him with you?"
"Two man job." Mal gave Wash a not-very-apologetic smile and followed Zoe out the door.
Wash sighed and looked to Kaylee for help.
"No way! No gorram way! This place has a bathhouse and I'm gonna spend as long as I can in there. Bubbles, Wash, and nice-smelling soap. Forget it." She was out the door before he could try to make a token argument. She didn't even finish her dinner.
But. That did give him an idea.
Wash had to swear on his life that there were bath attendants to get Jayne to agree to go. Seems he'd already scented out the nearest whorehouse and was reluctant to even entertain the idea of anything else.
"Young. Nubile." Wash made a curvy shape with his hands. "Willing, if the price is right."
Jayne grunted. "What do you need me to go for?"
Wash scrambled for an answer. "I'm nervous, okay? I've never been to one of these places." He was babbling, but at least it made his story seem real. "Besides, you owe me after you got in that bar fight on New Io and we had to hightail it out of there before the law showed up. I had a lot of money riding on that game." He could see Jayne was considering it. "You can always go to that other place after." Wash would have to think of something else soon, because there was no way a bath was going to take two hours and he was pretty sure his ruse was going to fall apart immediately after they stepped in the door. Maybe he could bribe someone to lock them in.
Jayne nodded. "Alright. But the girls better be good lookin'."
And they were off.
Turned out the bathhouse did have an attendant, but she was older than Wash's grandmother and they sent her away as soon as they were led to their baths. Wash tried to act shocked, like he'd been given bad information, but Jayne just scowled. "You're payin' for this," was all he said.
Wash sighed and agreed. "Fine." He'd make Mal pay him back for it. It was the least he could do.
But it wasn't all bad. The bathtubs were huge, big enough for two, really, and filled with hot, clean water. There were towels and yes, nice-smelling soap, laid out for them. Wash wondered idly if the bubbles were only on the women's side.
"Hey, when was the last time you had a real bath?" he asked as he started to undress. He tried for a cheerful tone.
Jayne gave him a suspicious look and sat down to take off his boots. "Been a while, I suppose."
"See, this is a good thing. I'm sure the ladies at that establishment you mentioned will appreciate it."
"They're whores, Wash. You don't pay them to care about whether you got dirt behind your ears."
"Right." Nothing else was said as they both finished undressing. Wash kept his gaze averted, but he could feel Jayne's eyes as he stepped over to his tub.
"I'm not dumb."
Wash had to bite his tongue. "What?" He dipped his hand in the water to see how hot it was and looked up, meeting Jayne's eyes. Jayne's frank stare. Jayne's very slow perusal of Wash. Of Wash's naked body. Wash got into the tub as fast as he could. He did not squeak. Really.
"Just sayin'. I know what you're up to." Jayne made a happy sound as he settled in his own tub of water.
"I really don't think you do."
"Wanted to get me naked and alone."
Wash decided that he very much needed to duck his head under the water at that moment. But he could only hold his breath for so long.
Jayne was still talking when he came up for air. "I seen the way you look at me."
Wash choked. "H-how's that?"
Jayne chuckled.
Wash fumbled for the soap and started hurriedly washing his hair. The sooner they could get done and out of there, the better. Screw Mal. He did not sign up for this, whatever it was. He didn't know if Jayne was for real or messing with him, and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out. He closed his eyes and tried to ignore the splashing coming from the other tub.
Jayne wouldn't shut up. "You ever been with a man?"
"What!" he exclaimed. And that's when the soap got in his eyes. "Tzao-gao!"
Wash was so preoccupied with the stinging of the soap that he didn't realize Jayne was now standing over him. "Here," Jayne said as he handed him a towel.
"Thanks." The towel helped with most of the burning, but his vision was a little wacky and he was sure he was seeing things when Jayne climbed into the tub with him. It was the sloshing of the water that convinced him it was real.
"No problem. I was coming over here, anyway."
Wash couldn't speak. This- this was taking a joke a little too far. Jayne couldn't be serious.
But he very much was, and this was proven when he leaned forward and kissed Wash. It was a nice kiss, really, once you got past the shock. Jayne had a nice mouth and nice lips and a nice tongue. It was all very nice. And warm. And Jayne's arms were nice around his shoulders and Jayne's chest was...
Someone cleared their throat.
"We gotta go. Right now. Get dressed and back to the mule. You got two minutes."
Wash stared dumbly at the door where Mal had just been.
Mal stepped back in, a bemused expression on his face. "I gotta say, Wash. You sure tackle a problem in an unusual way. I'm not sure if I should be impressed or horrified."
Wash didn't even remember their mad scramble to the mule afterwards. But he did remember the ride back to the ship, sure of two things only: he still had soap in his hair and Jayne's hand on his ass wasn't as unwelcome as it might have been before.
Author: llaras
Fandom: Firefly
Pairing: Jayne/Wash
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: Joss doesn't mind.
Notes: Written for ru_salki99 in this year's washathon. The request was for kissing, no angst and Wash and Zoe not being married. This is set pre-series. Approx 1200 words. Much love to quiesce for the beta!
Summary: Mal asks Wash to keep Jayne busy.
It seemed like Wash always got stuck with the stuff no one else wanted to do.
"Are you kidding me?"
"Sit on him or something. We don't have time to mess around in town on this trip and I don't trust Jayne to stay in the hotel."
"Well, how the hell am I supposed to keep him here?"
"I don't know, challenge him to a game." Mal indicated the chessboard set up on a table next to the fireplace.
"Really."
"Cards, then. Or ask him about one of his guns. It's your problem now, you'll figure something out."
"Great."
Zoe poked her head around the doorframe of the private dining room, ignoring Wash completely. "Mal, it's time."
"Two hours, tops, and then we'll be back. Just keep Jayne here and away from the whorehouse. We may need to leave in a hurry and I'm not going looking for him."
"Why can't you take him with you?"
"Two man job." Mal gave Wash a not-very-apologetic smile and followed Zoe out the door.
Wash sighed and looked to Kaylee for help.
"No way! No gorram way! This place has a bathhouse and I'm gonna spend as long as I can in there. Bubbles, Wash, and nice-smelling soap. Forget it." She was out the door before he could try to make a token argument. She didn't even finish her dinner.
But. That did give him an idea.
Wash had to swear on his life that there were bath attendants to get Jayne to agree to go. Seems he'd already scented out the nearest whorehouse and was reluctant to even entertain the idea of anything else.
"Young. Nubile." Wash made a curvy shape with his hands. "Willing, if the price is right."
Jayne grunted. "What do you need me to go for?"
Wash scrambled for an answer. "I'm nervous, okay? I've never been to one of these places." He was babbling, but at least it made his story seem real. "Besides, you owe me after you got in that bar fight on New Io and we had to hightail it out of there before the law showed up. I had a lot of money riding on that game." He could see Jayne was considering it. "You can always go to that other place after." Wash would have to think of something else soon, because there was no way a bath was going to take two hours and he was pretty sure his ruse was going to fall apart immediately after they stepped in the door. Maybe he could bribe someone to lock them in.
Jayne nodded. "Alright. But the girls better be good lookin'."
And they were off.
Turned out the bathhouse did have an attendant, but she was older than Wash's grandmother and they sent her away as soon as they were led to their baths. Wash tried to act shocked, like he'd been given bad information, but Jayne just scowled. "You're payin' for this," was all he said.
Wash sighed and agreed. "Fine." He'd make Mal pay him back for it. It was the least he could do.
But it wasn't all bad. The bathtubs were huge, big enough for two, really, and filled with hot, clean water. There were towels and yes, nice-smelling soap, laid out for them. Wash wondered idly if the bubbles were only on the women's side.
"Hey, when was the last time you had a real bath?" he asked as he started to undress. He tried for a cheerful tone.
Jayne gave him a suspicious look and sat down to take off his boots. "Been a while, I suppose."
"See, this is a good thing. I'm sure the ladies at that establishment you mentioned will appreciate it."
"They're whores, Wash. You don't pay them to care about whether you got dirt behind your ears."
"Right." Nothing else was said as they both finished undressing. Wash kept his gaze averted, but he could feel Jayne's eyes as he stepped over to his tub.
"I'm not dumb."
Wash had to bite his tongue. "What?" He dipped his hand in the water to see how hot it was and looked up, meeting Jayne's eyes. Jayne's frank stare. Jayne's very slow perusal of Wash. Of Wash's naked body. Wash got into the tub as fast as he could. He did not squeak. Really.
"Just sayin'. I know what you're up to." Jayne made a happy sound as he settled in his own tub of water.
"I really don't think you do."
"Wanted to get me naked and alone."
Wash decided that he very much needed to duck his head under the water at that moment. But he could only hold his breath for so long.
Jayne was still talking when he came up for air. "I seen the way you look at me."
Wash choked. "H-how's that?"
Jayne chuckled.
Wash fumbled for the soap and started hurriedly washing his hair. The sooner they could get done and out of there, the better. Screw Mal. He did not sign up for this, whatever it was. He didn't know if Jayne was for real or messing with him, and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out. He closed his eyes and tried to ignore the splashing coming from the other tub.
Jayne wouldn't shut up. "You ever been with a man?"
"What!" he exclaimed. And that's when the soap got in his eyes. "Tzao-gao!"
Wash was so preoccupied with the stinging of the soap that he didn't realize Jayne was now standing over him. "Here," Jayne said as he handed him a towel.
"Thanks." The towel helped with most of the burning, but his vision was a little wacky and he was sure he was seeing things when Jayne climbed into the tub with him. It was the sloshing of the water that convinced him it was real.
"No problem. I was coming over here, anyway."
Wash couldn't speak. This- this was taking a joke a little too far. Jayne couldn't be serious.
But he very much was, and this was proven when he leaned forward and kissed Wash. It was a nice kiss, really, once you got past the shock. Jayne had a nice mouth and nice lips and a nice tongue. It was all very nice. And warm. And Jayne's arms were nice around his shoulders and Jayne's chest was...
Someone cleared their throat.
"We gotta go. Right now. Get dressed and back to the mule. You got two minutes."
Wash stared dumbly at the door where Mal had just been.
Mal stepped back in, a bemused expression on his face. "I gotta say, Wash. You sure tackle a problem in an unusual way. I'm not sure if I should be impressed or horrified."
Wash didn't even remember their mad scramble to the mule afterwards. But he did remember the ride back to the ship, sure of two things only: he still had soap in his hair and Jayne's hand on his ass wasn't as unwelcome as it might have been before.