Mmmmm. Yum.
Okay, this story may not be so safe, it's going behind a cut.
So let's keep in mind that I moved about a year ago to a whole new state and I needed new doctors etc. I asked for recommendations for a gyno rather than look one up in the phone book or online; it just seemed ... icky to do it that way. So I started getting uber personal with the few people I know here and begged for names of a good gyno. My friend Jackie gave me a name of a male doctor and then a female nurse practitioner. She said she liked the lady better, so I rolled the dice and went with her.
I'm driving down Cottonwood Drive watching the numbers and I rolled right past the place. Turns out my insurance company is literally one door over. I could make this a one stop shop and upgrade my insurance while getting a sneak-peek at the goods. So, anyway, it turns out to be a typical doctor appointment where I fill out paperwork and then sit around for an hour waiting to be called. Eventually they bring me into the room and the nurse practitioner comes in and introduces herself... and her student. That's right, her student. Nice. They tell me to strip down and they'll be right back. Okay, I guess the student can stay? I mean, whatever, a vagina is a vagina and it's all good. I can be a guinea pig.
About 5 minutes later they come back and pat down the boobs and then request that I flip up those feet into the stirrups. I do. So here I am, feet up, legs spread with two women and flashlight peering up my vag. Now, if you know me, this is grade-A, prime, awkward and awesome material. Now they're poking around, business as usual, when the 'teacher' exclaims, "OH! What a treat! Did you know you're ovulating? When did you last have a period?" I want to crack up. O-M-G. I must be a freak of nature. She starts pointing out, gag, the mucus membrane and this and that. When the examine is over, the student seriously looked me dead in the eyes and told me I have a 'beautiful uterus'. That's right people, be jealous. I have a beautiful uterus. I had no idea how to respond to that so I simply replied, "Thanks. I grew it myself." She gave me a funny look and then walked out. Job accomplished.
<
"Ahhhh.... " "OOOhhhh!"
"What a pretty mucus membrane!"
So let's keep in mind that I moved about a year ago to a whole new state and I needed new doctors etc. I asked for recommendations for a gyno rather than look one up in the phone book or online; it just seemed ... icky to do it that way. So I started getting uber personal with the few people I know here and begged for names of a good gyno. My friend Jackie gave me a name of a male doctor and then a female nurse practitioner. She said she liked the lady better, so I rolled the dice and went with her.
I'm driving down Cottonwood Drive watching the numbers and I rolled right past the place. Turns out my insurance company is literally one door over. I could make this a one stop shop and upgrade my insurance while getting a sneak-peek at the goods. So, anyway, it turns out to be a typical doctor appointment where I fill out paperwork and then sit around for an hour waiting to be called. Eventually they bring me into the room and the nurse practitioner comes in and introduces herself... and her student. That's right, her student. Nice. They tell me to strip down and they'll be right back. Okay, I guess the student can stay? I mean, whatever, a vagina is a vagina and it's all good. I can be a guinea pig.
About 5 minutes later they come back and pat down the boobs and then request that I flip up those feet into the stirrups. I do. So here I am, feet up, legs spread with two women and flashlight peering up my vag. Now, if you know me, this is grade-A, prime, awkward and awesome material. Now they're poking around, business as usual, when the 'teacher' exclaims, "OH! What a treat! Did you know you're ovulating? When did you last have a period?" I want to crack up. O-M-G. I must be a freak of nature. She starts pointing out, gag, the mucus membrane and this and that. When the examine is over, the student seriously looked me dead in the eyes and told me I have a 'beautiful uterus'. That's right people, be jealous. I have a beautiful uterus. I had no idea how to respond to that so I simply replied, "Thanks. I grew it myself." She gave me a funny look and then walked out. Job accomplished.
<
"Ahhhh.... " "OOOhhhh!"
"What a pretty mucus membrane!"