Christmas; A Cracky Interlude
Christmas; A Cracky Interlude
by sempiternusamor
Wordcount: 2977
Rating: PG13
Pairings: Kristi/Matt Bellamy/Dom Howard, Monte/Jensen, Lyss/Jared, Misha/Amy/Chris Kane
Feedback: Hell yea! I didn’t post this thing for my health.
Summary: Christmas day being for family, the gang decides to catch up in the week before Christmas for a few days in Lake Como. Jet planes really come in handy for this kind of thing. A mistletoe war is going on.
Disclaimer: For god’s sakes, this didn’t happen. I’d be frightened if it did. Deliriously happy, but vaguely frightened and suspicious of the use of hallucinogenics.
A/N: Merry Christmas!!!! Enjoy. I know it’s silly. But it’s also kind of a wonderful dream, even the idea that this could happen.
Monte's Note: have I mentioned I have the best friends eva? cus I do...and they write awesome stuff like this
Two bodies, one belonging to a brunette and the other to a blonde, spilled haphazardly from the music room, giggling raucously and tripping over one another.
The newly blonde woman simply stared, hand still raised from where she’d been about to knock on the door. “Do I want to know what you two are up to?”
Matt’s giggle, if it were possible, grew even more unhinged. “Even if you did want to know, we wouldn’t tell. It’s a secret.”
This seemed to make Dom laugh even harder, and consequently, he and Matt ended up in a gangly pile of limbs on the floor, right in the doorway.
Kristi looked down at them, shaking her head. “Fucked if I know what’s up with you. Anyway, people are getting here in about half an hour.”
“I get my plane back?!” Matt exclaimed, still lying half on top of Dom.
Kristi rolled her eyes. “Yes. Now will you calm down a little?”
“Never.” He reassured her, grin wide enough to rival Dom’s on his face. As she turned to walk away, he jumped to his feet. “Oi!” He waggled a long finger at the doorframe. “Mistletoe.”
With a weary sigh - he and Dom had placed ‘strategic mistletoe’ all around the house at different points in time - she planted a kiss on his lips. “Happy?”
“Quite.”
“Can I make a request though?” She stroked a hand down his chest and looked at him from under her eyelashes.
“I’d be happy to oblige.” He said with a filthy grin.
“If you’re going to snog Dom, can I watch?”
“What?!” Matt spluttered.
She leapt out of his reach and pointed tauntingly at the shrubbery. “Mistletoe. Them’s the rules.”
Kristi ran away giggling. The lead up to Christmas was certainly promising so far.
The brunette woman groaned in appreciation as she eyed the scruffy man on the large television screen.
“What?” Came the question from the man whose arm was draped over her stomach, hand splayed on her ribcage.
“I would tap that if I had half the chance.” She watched the screen with unwavering interest, even as she spoke, more or less disregarding the men and women in scrubs for the man in the plain shirt sporting a killer smile. “Man, why the fuck did I have to have my brilliant idea after he died?”
“Cheers babe, means a lot.” Matt grumbled, pouting.
Chris walked in, offering his friends a beer as he sank to the floor with his late dinner, somehow finding a spot among the people littering the floor.
“Eh, I wouldn’t worry about it. Kels says the same thing.” He got an elbow in the chest from his wife for his troubles.
“Great! Wonderful! I just love to know that there’s women out there lusting over a dead man!”
“Shut up! Both of you! I’m missing the rumbly voice hotness.”
The bassist chuckled quietly to himself at the look on Matt’s face, and the enrapt one on Kristi’s. He’d learn, soon enough.
Matt however, pout firmly in place on his lips, twisted his head to look at Monte. “I thought you hated this show. And you-” He looked at Jensen, curled up with the woman he’d addressed previously. “-They’re competition.”
Monte shrugged. “I don’t go out of my way to watch it, no. However, when that particular man-” She indicated Jeff on the television screen. “-Is on, looking that fine, I have no issues. Well, not really.”
Still perplexed, Matt looked at Jensen, who simply shrugged and mouthed something resembling ‘women’ accompanied with a roll of his eyes. Matt nodded, mouthing back ‘ridiculous’. Jared caught their attention and added his own look of confusion.
Lyss dug the tips of her fingers in to his chest to let him know that his gesture had not gone unnoticed.
As the end credits rolled, Kristi stretched and dug her toes into Dom’s thigh - it somehow didn’t surprise her that the blonde man had not partaken in the confused discussion; he’d been too busy watching the show. “So, Monte, remind me again why Aimee is not joining us until tomorrow? I thought I worked it out so that it fit with everyone’s schedules having a few days here the week before Christmas.”
Monte rolled her eyes with a laugh, absentmindedly playing with one of the rings Jensen had plundered from Dean’s props and was wearing. “Well, she and Misha couldn’t bear the thought of leaving Christian on his own for a day while he finished up filming and such - you know, doing Christian things - so…”
“They stopped off in Cali to fit in some undoubtedly filthy sex not only at his apartment, but also on the way over. I suppose they figured if you’re going to be on a long ass plane ride from Cali to Milan, they might as well spend it having yet more filthy sex.” Jensen completed, with a delightfully filthy leer at Monte that most certainly did not go unnoticed, judging by the claps on the back he received from both Dom and Jared, or the clip around the ear he got from Monte.
“Mistletoe!” Dom swooped in and pecked her cheek before Kristi had even had a chance to register he was standing in front of her, as she trudged in to the kitchen to get her coffee so she could function normally.
“Too early. Coffee first.”
Grinning, the drummer slid her favourite mug along the bench top. “Say thankyou.”
“Thankyou.”
He swept out of the room as quickly as he’d entered, she guessed going to find Matt to do whatever it was they’d been holed up with Christian, Jensen, Jared and Misha doing ever since he’d been up - at some ungodly hour of the morning like seven.
Part of her wished he’d take advantage of the sleep in once in a while. This was really a very short break just before Christmas before it was back to life on the road, for god knows how long. But Matt was Matt, and you didn’t argue with Matt unless it was important. And the impish little grin on his face that said he was planning something was entirely too intriguing, especially so early in the morning.
“Drummer boy get you too?” Monte slid into the seat next to her, also obviously devoid of male company because of this mysterious, devious plan.
“Hm?”
“Them and their stupid mistletoe.”
“Jared got me last night. It’s spread to everyone.”
“It’s a disease.” Monte agreed.
“Morning.” Aimee was entirely too chirpy.
Kristi groaned. “You’re bloody glowing and everything. Will you three ever stop shagging like rabbits?”
“Jesus, I hope not. It’s entirely too fun. And like you can talk, heard all about you, Matt and Dom.”
“One time. We were drunk.”
“You wouldn’t say no if it happened again though, would you?”
Kristi remained mute, slight grin on her face.
“We need to do something about this mistletoe situation, it’s getting out of hand.” Lyss practically threw herself into the last remaining seat.
“We’ll get them back. I’d really like to know what they’re up to, it’s creeping me out sightly. Especially because Matt and Dom started it all. You never know what’s going to happen with those two.” Kristi mused.
She was met with agreement from all sides.
“Phase one; we freak them out as much as we possibly can.”
“What does this accomplish, exactly?”
Kristi stopped and half glared at Monte playfully. “Not a lot, really. It’s quite fun though. Obviously out JDM perve-fest the other night started it without our even knowing, so that’s good.”
“How are we actually freaking them out?”
“Two ways I’ve found work best; sporadically burst into laughter whilst looking at them, when they inevitably say ‘what?’ just say nothing. And put their names into google news. Or even just google. The shit it comes out with sometimes...priceless. Actually, three; find the dodgiest picture you can of them and print it out A4. Just leave it somewhere, that one’s pretty funny. Slight variation; I’ve found leaving random pieces of BellDom fanfics open on the computer - higher rated the better - is not only hilarious, but also scares them. Quite a lot.”
Monte giggled. “The Muse fan girl’s equivalent to Wincest, yes?”
“Precisely.”
“They’re scaring me.” Jared proclaimed, shutting the door securely behind him.
Jensen scoffed. “Join the freaking club. I found fiction.”
“It’s unreasonable to think that just because they’re now dating you they stop writing…” Misha interjected.
“No. No. You don’t seem to understand. The fiction.”
Jared’s eyes widened. “You mean...”
“Yes.” Jensen nodded solemnly.
“And it was...”
“Yeah. It was bad.”
“Bunch on pussies.” Christian proclaimed, fiddling with a guitar he’d borrowed from Matt.
“Oh, you don’t want to know what else I found, involving a certain other band member and yourself.” Jensen couldn’t help to mention. Yes. They were all mature.
“That was low. You didn’t need to say anything.”
“...It was! Matt, I’m telling you. She was reading it, it was open on the laptop.” Dom whined as he and his friend too found refuge in the music room.
“But it’s just weird...”
“I fucking know! They’re all being weird.”
“It’s all part of their plan.” Misha decided. “They’re trying to weird us out. They’ll never beat our surprise though.” Although a ripple of assent passed through the group at this, there was still a slight undercurrent of nerves.
“Put some more up there.” Kristi gestured with a mistletoe filled hand to a spot on the roof that was, as yet, uncovered. Or, not entirely covered, as it were.
Monte rolled her eyes and took the bouquet that Lyss offered her, standing straight up on the ladder to wind it in with the rest. “Happy?”
“Excellent. I can’t believe they had a fucking stash of mistletoe plants.”
“I know...it could’ve at least been a stash of something more interesting.” Aimee commented, bending to pick up the empty basket.
Kristi giggled and jumped down from her step, having finished her part of the room they’d chosen for the pre-Christmas party. “Dom knows people, no need for a stash of that. Are we done?”
“I think so...” Lyss span around looking up at the roof, which was, it seemed, positively covered in the plant. “This is a bit over the top, now I think about it.”
“Perfect revenge though.”
“Is it though? I mean, it’s not like they wouldn’t get kisses if they just asked. And this way is just an excuse to be more or less permanently attached at the mouth.”
“Are you complaining at that thought?”
Monte re-entered the room, tray of glasses with her.
“Where did you go?” Kristi asked, eyeing the glasses.
“Just to grab something a prepared earlier. Here.”
"What is it?” Kristi eyed the liquid somewhat suspiciously.
“Eggnog. Extra nog. Of course, nothing like it’ll be at the party. No point drinking it without spiking it first. And before you say anything, that one’s yours, it doesn’t taste like egg as much.”
“I fucking love you.”
“I think it has to be said, excellent job ladies.” Matt announced upon the arrival of the menfolk into the decorated room. He was, however, talking about the lights on the walls and the giant spread of food, not having looked at the ceiling as yet.
There were murmurs of agreement among the others, and simple smiles from the women in question, standing as they were approached.
Then all at once, all that could be heard was cries of ‘mistletoe’. Surprised looking males were ravaged, much to the delight of various females. For posterity, Dom recorded some of this on his iPhone, until Kristi realised he was being tragically left out and - much to Matt’s amusement - kissed the surprised looking drummer.
“Okay! Okay, you lot win.” Matt yelled over the popping of Christmas crackers and quite a number of coital sounding noises (admittedly most of them from Misha, Christian and Aimee). “But we have a surprise. From all of us.” He nodded to the others and they made for the door leading to the music room, Dom grabbing Christian by the ear on the way.
“What?” Kristi blinked at their retreating backs. This was supposed to be the girls’ night of getting them back, they weren’t meant to have surprises. Trust them to fuck it all up.
“This better be fucking good.” Aimee grouched, alone now after being more or less attached at the mouth to either Christian or Misha for most of the evening.
“Turn around and shut your eyes.” Came a yell from the back room in Jared’s booming voice.
“Why!?” Lyss yelled back with a smirk.
“Because I fucking said so missy! Don’t make me come out there.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?” Monte chimed in, setting the bowl of heavily spiked eggnog on the table in its centrepiece.
“Just fucking do it!” Jensen yelled out at her.
There were a few giggles as the women turned so that their backs faced the door the boys had left through. “That’s what she said.” Kristi muttered, which caused more giggles (maturity - 0). The sounds coming from behind them made it doubly hard not to turn and peek.
“Okay, turn around now.” Matt commanded, and as one the group did as they were told (just for once).
Dom sat at his new drum kit, silly grin plastered on his face. Matt was standing by a keyboard they’d somehow dragged in, looking seconds away from the manic laughter he was so prone to. Christian had one of Matt’s less seen Manson guitars ready for playing, and Jensen one of the basses Chris had left behind the last time he’d been over, microphones kin to Matt’s near the pair of them. Jared and Misha stood on either end of the impromptu band, grinning ear to ear.
“Merry Christmas.” They said, at the same time Matt began to play, and Dom joined.
While the jingle bells are jinglin'
And the snow begins to fall
And my Grandma makes some gingerbread cookies
Just across the hall
I'm freaking 'bout what to get you
And suddenly it occurs to me
The best Christmas present is to rock your body underneath the fuckin' tree!
I wanna rock you hard this Christmas
I wanna fill your stocking with my candy cane of joy
But have a very merry motherfucking Christmas
I'm driving a love train down Santa Claus lane
I'm your little drummer boy
While the eggnog is all noggy
And the fireplace all a-glow
While our bodies are heatin' up in yuletide places down below
I hope you like my present
It was way too big to wrap
I'm gonna get naughty all over your body
Come sit on Santa's lap!
I wanna rock you hard this Christmas
I wanna fill your stocking with my candy cane of joy
But have a very merry motherfucking Christmas
We're driving a love train down Santa Claus lane
I'm your little drummer boy
We'll be slushin' like snow angels till the morning
We won't hear the reindeer hoofin' up above
We won't hear Santa coming down the chimney
We won't see he and my Grandma making hot-ass cookie love
But we'll hear him exclaim as he rides out of sight, he'll fuckin' say:
"Granny I rocked you hard this Christmas
I filled your stocking with my candy cane of joy
So have a very merry motherfucking Christmas"
And the world will start rejoicing
And the choir boys start to sing
And the lords of leaping give the ladies in waiting
Their five ass golden rings
And the seven pipers are piping
The eight maids are milking in the snow
And I'll be happy when I'm gettin' unwrappy by my Christmas ho, ho, ho!
Have a very merry motherfucking Christmas!
Peace on earth, we are the world, and frickin' kumbaya!
Have a very merry motherfucking Christmas!
Deck the halls with your Christmas balls!
Fa la la la la la, FA LA LA!
As soon as the first chorus had begun, the girls had broken into uncontrollable fits of laughter, which didn’t stop for the rest of the song, and a long time after.
“That deserves eggnog. And was possibly the best thing I’ve ever seen. Definitely best Christmas present ever.” Kristi declared, passing out drinks.
Dom downed his first in one. “More nog than egg. Just the way I like it. I take it this was your doing?” He questioned Monte, who nodded, somewhat proudly. “It wouldn’t be fair of me to take advantage of the wonderful mistletoe work of you lot and..."
“Fuck off Howard.” Jensen slipped an arm comfortably around Monte's shoulders and grinned. He may have even poked his tongue out, but for maturity’s sake.
“You can take advantage of me.” Kristi nudged him with another drink, Matt firmly locked around her waist, but showing no objection to the possible addition of the drummer to the evening's events.
Dom more or less leered. “Excellent.”
The green-eyed woman smiled coyly at the blue-eyed man. “Merry Christmas?” She asked, a little meekly.
He groaned and turned over, unwittingly almost onto his blonde friend. “Fucking hell Dom, shove over.”
The drummer in question obliged, burying his face in a pillow. Kristi cocked her head to one side and promptly set about climbing over Matt, nestling in between the two friends. At his questioning look, she shrugged. “I was cold. Enjoy the party?”
He flashed her a smile that made her heart melt. “Of course. You got us good. And I can’t say the sex wasn’t good either.”
“Cause I was here.” Dom grunted, half asleep.
“Fuck up.” Matt made to hit the other man, to have Kristi grab his hand in midair and curl around it, making herself comfortable in what she was quickly deciding was quite a good place, in between a pixie and a drummer.
Quite a good place.
Download : I Wanna Rock You Hard This Christmas - The Dan Band
Previous: One of Those Days
by sempiternusamor
Wordcount: 2977
Rating: PG13
Pairings: Kristi/Matt Bellamy/Dom Howard, Monte/Jensen, Lyss/Jared, Misha/Amy/Chris Kane
Feedback: Hell yea! I didn’t post this thing for my health.
Summary: Christmas day being for family, the gang decides to catch up in the week before Christmas for a few days in Lake Como. Jet planes really come in handy for this kind of thing. A mistletoe war is going on.
Disclaimer: For god’s sakes, this didn’t happen. I’d be frightened if it did. Deliriously happy, but vaguely frightened and suspicious of the use of hallucinogenics.
A/N: Merry Christmas!!!! Enjoy. I know it’s silly. But it’s also kind of a wonderful dream, even the idea that this could happen.
Monte's Note: have I mentioned I have the best friends eva? cus I do...and they write awesome stuff like this
Two bodies, one belonging to a brunette and the other to a blonde, spilled haphazardly from the music room, giggling raucously and tripping over one another.
The newly blonde woman simply stared, hand still raised from where she’d been about to knock on the door. “Do I want to know what you two are up to?”
Matt’s giggle, if it were possible, grew even more unhinged. “Even if you did want to know, we wouldn’t tell. It’s a secret.”
This seemed to make Dom laugh even harder, and consequently, he and Matt ended up in a gangly pile of limbs on the floor, right in the doorway.
Kristi looked down at them, shaking her head. “Fucked if I know what’s up with you. Anyway, people are getting here in about half an hour.”
“I get my plane back?!” Matt exclaimed, still lying half on top of Dom.
Kristi rolled her eyes. “Yes. Now will you calm down a little?”
“Never.” He reassured her, grin wide enough to rival Dom’s on his face. As she turned to walk away, he jumped to his feet. “Oi!” He waggled a long finger at the doorframe. “Mistletoe.”
With a weary sigh - he and Dom had placed ‘strategic mistletoe’ all around the house at different points in time - she planted a kiss on his lips. “Happy?”
“Quite.”
“Can I make a request though?” She stroked a hand down his chest and looked at him from under her eyelashes.
“I’d be happy to oblige.” He said with a filthy grin.
“If you’re going to snog Dom, can I watch?”
“What?!” Matt spluttered.
She leapt out of his reach and pointed tauntingly at the shrubbery. “Mistletoe. Them’s the rules.”
Kristi ran away giggling. The lead up to Christmas was certainly promising so far.
The brunette woman groaned in appreciation as she eyed the scruffy man on the large television screen.
“What?” Came the question from the man whose arm was draped over her stomach, hand splayed on her ribcage.
“I would tap that if I had half the chance.” She watched the screen with unwavering interest, even as she spoke, more or less disregarding the men and women in scrubs for the man in the plain shirt sporting a killer smile. “Man, why the fuck did I have to have my brilliant idea after he died?”
“Cheers babe, means a lot.” Matt grumbled, pouting.
Chris walked in, offering his friends a beer as he sank to the floor with his late dinner, somehow finding a spot among the people littering the floor.
“Eh, I wouldn’t worry about it. Kels says the same thing.” He got an elbow in the chest from his wife for his troubles.
“Great! Wonderful! I just love to know that there’s women out there lusting over a dead man!”
“Shut up! Both of you! I’m missing the rumbly voice hotness.”
The bassist chuckled quietly to himself at the look on Matt’s face, and the enrapt one on Kristi’s. He’d learn, soon enough.
Matt however, pout firmly in place on his lips, twisted his head to look at Monte. “I thought you hated this show. And you-” He looked at Jensen, curled up with the woman he’d addressed previously. “-They’re competition.”
Monte shrugged. “I don’t go out of my way to watch it, no. However, when that particular man-” She indicated Jeff on the television screen. “-Is on, looking that fine, I have no issues. Well, not really.”
Still perplexed, Matt looked at Jensen, who simply shrugged and mouthed something resembling ‘women’ accompanied with a roll of his eyes. Matt nodded, mouthing back ‘ridiculous’. Jared caught their attention and added his own look of confusion.
Lyss dug the tips of her fingers in to his chest to let him know that his gesture had not gone unnoticed.
As the end credits rolled, Kristi stretched and dug her toes into Dom’s thigh - it somehow didn’t surprise her that the blonde man had not partaken in the confused discussion; he’d been too busy watching the show. “So, Monte, remind me again why Aimee is not joining us until tomorrow? I thought I worked it out so that it fit with everyone’s schedules having a few days here the week before Christmas.”
Monte rolled her eyes with a laugh, absentmindedly playing with one of the rings Jensen had plundered from Dean’s props and was wearing. “Well, she and Misha couldn’t bear the thought of leaving Christian on his own for a day while he finished up filming and such - you know, doing Christian things - so…”
“They stopped off in Cali to fit in some undoubtedly filthy sex not only at his apartment, but also on the way over. I suppose they figured if you’re going to be on a long ass plane ride from Cali to Milan, they might as well spend it having yet more filthy sex.” Jensen completed, with a delightfully filthy leer at Monte that most certainly did not go unnoticed, judging by the claps on the back he received from both Dom and Jared, or the clip around the ear he got from Monte.
“Mistletoe!” Dom swooped in and pecked her cheek before Kristi had even had a chance to register he was standing in front of her, as she trudged in to the kitchen to get her coffee so she could function normally.
“Too early. Coffee first.”
Grinning, the drummer slid her favourite mug along the bench top. “Say thankyou.”
“Thankyou.”
He swept out of the room as quickly as he’d entered, she guessed going to find Matt to do whatever it was they’d been holed up with Christian, Jensen, Jared and Misha doing ever since he’d been up - at some ungodly hour of the morning like seven.
Part of her wished he’d take advantage of the sleep in once in a while. This was really a very short break just before Christmas before it was back to life on the road, for god knows how long. But Matt was Matt, and you didn’t argue with Matt unless it was important. And the impish little grin on his face that said he was planning something was entirely too intriguing, especially so early in the morning.
“Drummer boy get you too?” Monte slid into the seat next to her, also obviously devoid of male company because of this mysterious, devious plan.
“Hm?”
“Them and their stupid mistletoe.”
“Jared got me last night. It’s spread to everyone.”
“It’s a disease.” Monte agreed.
“Morning.” Aimee was entirely too chirpy.
Kristi groaned. “You’re bloody glowing and everything. Will you three ever stop shagging like rabbits?”
“Jesus, I hope not. It’s entirely too fun. And like you can talk, heard all about you, Matt and Dom.”
“One time. We were drunk.”
“You wouldn’t say no if it happened again though, would you?”
Kristi remained mute, slight grin on her face.
“We need to do something about this mistletoe situation, it’s getting out of hand.” Lyss practically threw herself into the last remaining seat.
“We’ll get them back. I’d really like to know what they’re up to, it’s creeping me out sightly. Especially because Matt and Dom started it all. You never know what’s going to happen with those two.” Kristi mused.
She was met with agreement from all sides.
“Phase one; we freak them out as much as we possibly can.”
“What does this accomplish, exactly?”
Kristi stopped and half glared at Monte playfully. “Not a lot, really. It’s quite fun though. Obviously out JDM perve-fest the other night started it without our even knowing, so that’s good.”
“How are we actually freaking them out?”
“Two ways I’ve found work best; sporadically burst into laughter whilst looking at them, when they inevitably say ‘what?’ just say nothing. And put their names into google news. Or even just google. The shit it comes out with sometimes...priceless. Actually, three; find the dodgiest picture you can of them and print it out A4. Just leave it somewhere, that one’s pretty funny. Slight variation; I’ve found leaving random pieces of BellDom fanfics open on the computer - higher rated the better - is not only hilarious, but also scares them. Quite a lot.”
Monte giggled. “The Muse fan girl’s equivalent to Wincest, yes?”
“Precisely.”
“They’re scaring me.” Jared proclaimed, shutting the door securely behind him.
Jensen scoffed. “Join the freaking club. I found fiction.”
“It’s unreasonable to think that just because they’re now dating you they stop writing…” Misha interjected.
“No. No. You don’t seem to understand. The fiction.”
Jared’s eyes widened. “You mean...”
“Yes.” Jensen nodded solemnly.
“And it was...”
“Yeah. It was bad.”
“Bunch on pussies.” Christian proclaimed, fiddling with a guitar he’d borrowed from Matt.
“Oh, you don’t want to know what else I found, involving a certain other band member and yourself.” Jensen couldn’t help to mention. Yes. They were all mature.
“That was low. You didn’t need to say anything.”
“...It was! Matt, I’m telling you. She was reading it, it was open on the laptop.” Dom whined as he and his friend too found refuge in the music room.
“But it’s just weird...”
“I fucking know! They’re all being weird.”
“It’s all part of their plan.” Misha decided. “They’re trying to weird us out. They’ll never beat our surprise though.” Although a ripple of assent passed through the group at this, there was still a slight undercurrent of nerves.
“Put some more up there.” Kristi gestured with a mistletoe filled hand to a spot on the roof that was, as yet, uncovered. Or, not entirely covered, as it were.
Monte rolled her eyes and took the bouquet that Lyss offered her, standing straight up on the ladder to wind it in with the rest. “Happy?”
“Excellent. I can’t believe they had a fucking stash of mistletoe plants.”
“I know...it could’ve at least been a stash of something more interesting.” Aimee commented, bending to pick up the empty basket.
Kristi giggled and jumped down from her step, having finished her part of the room they’d chosen for the pre-Christmas party. “Dom knows people, no need for a stash of that. Are we done?”
“I think so...” Lyss span around looking up at the roof, which was, it seemed, positively covered in the plant. “This is a bit over the top, now I think about it.”
“Perfect revenge though.”
“Is it though? I mean, it’s not like they wouldn’t get kisses if they just asked. And this way is just an excuse to be more or less permanently attached at the mouth.”
“Are you complaining at that thought?”
Monte re-entered the room, tray of glasses with her.
“Where did you go?” Kristi asked, eyeing the glasses.
“Just to grab something a prepared earlier. Here.”
"What is it?” Kristi eyed the liquid somewhat suspiciously.
“Eggnog. Extra nog. Of course, nothing like it’ll be at the party. No point drinking it without spiking it first. And before you say anything, that one’s yours, it doesn’t taste like egg as much.”
“I fucking love you.”
“I think it has to be said, excellent job ladies.” Matt announced upon the arrival of the menfolk into the decorated room. He was, however, talking about the lights on the walls and the giant spread of food, not having looked at the ceiling as yet.
There were murmurs of agreement among the others, and simple smiles from the women in question, standing as they were approached.
Then all at once, all that could be heard was cries of ‘mistletoe’. Surprised looking males were ravaged, much to the delight of various females. For posterity, Dom recorded some of this on his iPhone, until Kristi realised he was being tragically left out and - much to Matt’s amusement - kissed the surprised looking drummer.
“Okay! Okay, you lot win.” Matt yelled over the popping of Christmas crackers and quite a number of coital sounding noises (admittedly most of them from Misha, Christian and Aimee). “But we have a surprise. From all of us.” He nodded to the others and they made for the door leading to the music room, Dom grabbing Christian by the ear on the way.
“What?” Kristi blinked at their retreating backs. This was supposed to be the girls’ night of getting them back, they weren’t meant to have surprises. Trust them to fuck it all up.
“This better be fucking good.” Aimee grouched, alone now after being more or less attached at the mouth to either Christian or Misha for most of the evening.
“Turn around and shut your eyes.” Came a yell from the back room in Jared’s booming voice.
“Why!?” Lyss yelled back with a smirk.
“Because I fucking said so missy! Don’t make me come out there.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?” Monte chimed in, setting the bowl of heavily spiked eggnog on the table in its centrepiece.
“Just fucking do it!” Jensen yelled out at her.
There were a few giggles as the women turned so that their backs faced the door the boys had left through. “That’s what she said.” Kristi muttered, which caused more giggles (maturity - 0). The sounds coming from behind them made it doubly hard not to turn and peek.
“Okay, turn around now.” Matt commanded, and as one the group did as they were told (just for once).
Dom sat at his new drum kit, silly grin plastered on his face. Matt was standing by a keyboard they’d somehow dragged in, looking seconds away from the manic laughter he was so prone to. Christian had one of Matt’s less seen Manson guitars ready for playing, and Jensen one of the basses Chris had left behind the last time he’d been over, microphones kin to Matt’s near the pair of them. Jared and Misha stood on either end of the impromptu band, grinning ear to ear.
“Merry Christmas.” They said, at the same time Matt began to play, and Dom joined.
While the jingle bells are jinglin'
And the snow begins to fall
And my Grandma makes some gingerbread cookies
Just across the hall
I'm freaking 'bout what to get you
And suddenly it occurs to me
The best Christmas present is to rock your body underneath the fuckin' tree!
I wanna rock you hard this Christmas
I wanna fill your stocking with my candy cane of joy
But have a very merry motherfucking Christmas
I'm driving a love train down Santa Claus lane
I'm your little drummer boy
While the eggnog is all noggy
And the fireplace all a-glow
While our bodies are heatin' up in yuletide places down below
I hope you like my present
It was way too big to wrap
I'm gonna get naughty all over your body
Come sit on Santa's lap!
I wanna rock you hard this Christmas
I wanna fill your stocking with my candy cane of joy
But have a very merry motherfucking Christmas
We're driving a love train down Santa Claus lane
I'm your little drummer boy
We'll be slushin' like snow angels till the morning
We won't hear the reindeer hoofin' up above
We won't hear Santa coming down the chimney
We won't see he and my Grandma making hot-ass cookie love
But we'll hear him exclaim as he rides out of sight, he'll fuckin' say:
"Granny I rocked you hard this Christmas
I filled your stocking with my candy cane of joy
So have a very merry motherfucking Christmas"
And the world will start rejoicing
And the choir boys start to sing
And the lords of leaping give the ladies in waiting
Their five ass golden rings
And the seven pipers are piping
The eight maids are milking in the snow
And I'll be happy when I'm gettin' unwrappy by my Christmas ho, ho, ho!
Have a very merry motherfucking Christmas!
Peace on earth, we are the world, and frickin' kumbaya!
Have a very merry motherfucking Christmas!
Deck the halls with your Christmas balls!
Fa la la la la la, FA LA LA!
As soon as the first chorus had begun, the girls had broken into uncontrollable fits of laughter, which didn’t stop for the rest of the song, and a long time after.
“That deserves eggnog. And was possibly the best thing I’ve ever seen. Definitely best Christmas present ever.” Kristi declared, passing out drinks.
Dom downed his first in one. “More nog than egg. Just the way I like it. I take it this was your doing?” He questioned Monte, who nodded, somewhat proudly. “It wouldn’t be fair of me to take advantage of the wonderful mistletoe work of you lot and..."
“Fuck off Howard.” Jensen slipped an arm comfortably around Monte's shoulders and grinned. He may have even poked his tongue out, but for maturity’s sake.
“You can take advantage of me.” Kristi nudged him with another drink, Matt firmly locked around her waist, but showing no objection to the possible addition of the drummer to the evening's events.
Dom more or less leered. “Excellent.”
The green-eyed woman smiled coyly at the blue-eyed man. “Merry Christmas?” She asked, a little meekly.
He groaned and turned over, unwittingly almost onto his blonde friend. “Fucking hell Dom, shove over.”
The drummer in question obliged, burying his face in a pillow. Kristi cocked her head to one side and promptly set about climbing over Matt, nestling in between the two friends. At his questioning look, she shrugged. “I was cold. Enjoy the party?”
He flashed her a smile that made her heart melt. “Of course. You got us good. And I can’t say the sex wasn’t good either.”
“Cause I was here.” Dom grunted, half asleep.
“Fuck up.” Matt made to hit the other man, to have Kristi grab his hand in midair and curl around it, making herself comfortable in what she was quickly deciding was quite a good place, in between a pixie and a drummer.
Quite a good place.
Download : I Wanna Rock You Hard This Christmas - The Dan Band
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