What now?
I couldn't get to sleep last night. Maybe it was because of the heat, or there were too many lights on, but mostly because I finished the sixth Harry Potter.
This is a really (really really) long overview of my feelings about what happened.
Okay, I think you guys all finished it, right? (don't read this if you haven't) It's hard to put into words what I want to say about the whole Snape thing. I feel sort of betrayed by JK Rowling at this point... It's hard not to let it kinda tear you apart (as much as fandom-related stuff can). I know some of my fellow Snapeists online are devistated, and I can 100% sympathise. This morning I woke up in bed, and looked out of the window to see that the sky was overcast, and the backyard almost completely devoid of color, and thought to my self "how appropriate." The thing about us Snape fans is that over our heads we've always kind of held up a sign saying "Yeah, but Snape's a good guy!", which sort of separated us from the Draco-lovers and Death-Eater people.
But I want to say for some of my (grieving)friends, as well as for myself, that it's okay... I'm hesitant to say it... But I'm still kinda hopeful. Naive? You have to remember how die-hard a Snape supporter I was. I'm not hopeful for the idea that one person put forward on a group, that it's all a hoax, that Albus is secretly alive or anything. His death didn't bother me nearly as much as the brutal fact that Snape was the one who killed him. What I'm hopeful for is that the character Snape won't just resign himself to becomeing one of the bad guys. I would be extremely pissed of at JK Rowling if that were to happen.
Why I liked Snape in the first place was how complicated a character he was. I have read books before where evil was evil and good was good, and it never sat well with me. I can't let myself believe that JK Rowling would put us through all that character development for nothing.
So many things have indicated that Snape was more than he seemed:
Book 1: Snape saves Harry (without being asked to) at the quidditch match.
Book 2:
"...Then Professor McGonagall Arrived.
'It has happened,' she told the silent staff room. 'A student has been taken by the monster. Right into the Chamber itself.'
Professor Flitwick let out a squeel. Professor Sprout clapped her hands over her mouth. Snape gripped the back of his chair very hard and said, "How can you be sure?"
Book 5: When Harry is being held captive by Umbridge in her office, he yells that "Snuffles" is in danger, and Snape immediately sets off and oes an aweful lot of running around. First to Grimmauld Place to alert them, then back to the room (I'm guessing), then to the forest searching for Harry.
Book 6:
"And should it prove necessary... if it seems Draco will fail..." whispered Narcissia (Snape's hand twitched whithin hers..."
In OotP, JK Rowling went through all of the trouble to round out Snapes character, even leading us to feel sorry for him in the chapter "Snape's Worst Memory" (If you didn't feel bad, to hell with you!). Why would she bother doing this if in the end Snape will just end up being one more of the murduring evil hated flat characters like in so many stories?
And even if the final book doesn't provide any peace for the Snapeaholics, we can still think about many reasons why this whole horrible thing ended up happening:
1. The Unbreakable Vow, obviously. Snape is not a Gryffindor. I don't think he's noble or brave enough to sacrafice his own life for Dumbledore's. And I think he genuinely had a soft spot for Malfoy. A kid up to his ears in the dark arts, the same as Sirius said Snape had been.
2. His childhood (pretty obvious too). He was still bitter about his past. I'm assuming from book 5 that his home life sucked, we know his school days were akward and humiliating. The Dark Arts is probably the only place where he fit in.
In regard to his school days, I think more than his bitterness to the Marauders, some of his hatred transferred to Dumbledore.
From Book 3:
" He crossed the door and held it open for Snape, but Snape hadn't moved.
'You surely don't believe a word of Black's story?' Snape whispered, his eyes fixed on Dumbledore's face.
'I wish to speak to Harry and Hermione alone," Dumbledore repeated.
Snape took a step toward Dumbledore.
'Sirius Black showed he was capable of murder at the age of sixteen,' he breathed. 'You haven't forgotten that headmaster? You haven't forgotten that he once tried to kill me?'
I think that Dumbledore (we all know he isn't perfect) never took the whole Srieking Shack prank as seriously as he would if, say, a Slytherin would have done it. He probably does practice at least a little favoritism, right? I'm not saying anything against him, it's just what I suspect. I know he had to protect Remus from being exposed as a Werewolf, and therefore not draw too much attention to the whole thing, but Snape probably never got over the special treatment which (again I'm only speculating) was given to James, Sirius, etc.
It seems like I'm getting off topic, but I'm kinda looking over his whole character.
Perhapse the reason why Snape so often displayed "good guy" tendencies was because he truly thought Voldemort was gone, therefor had not reason to keep up his evil side. Kinda let himself go. Became one of the good guys, while the bad guys were seemingly gone forever.
Who knows.
I'll just end this by saying that if you (my Snape-loving comerades), like me, were a little too deeply disturbed by the fact that Snape killed Dumbledore, and now you're sort of lost (It's harder than people think to completely change your perception of a character), you can rest a bit more easily by just appreciating the fact that Severus Snape is still, as much as ever, a complex guy. What he did was under the belt. He's a monster for doing it. That accepted, now we can see how it turns out. I would like to believe that the story's not over for Severus Snape.
Besides. What Peter did was worse ;p
This is a really (really really) long overview of my feelings about what happened.
Okay, I think you guys all finished it, right? (don't read this if you haven't) It's hard to put into words what I want to say about the whole Snape thing. I feel sort of betrayed by JK Rowling at this point... It's hard not to let it kinda tear you apart (as much as fandom-related stuff can). I know some of my fellow Snapeists online are devistated, and I can 100% sympathise. This morning I woke up in bed, and looked out of the window to see that the sky was overcast, and the backyard almost completely devoid of color, and thought to my self "how appropriate." The thing about us Snape fans is that over our heads we've always kind of held up a sign saying "Yeah, but Snape's a good guy!", which sort of separated us from the Draco-lovers and Death-Eater people.
But I want to say for some of my (grieving)friends, as well as for myself, that it's okay... I'm hesitant to say it... But I'm still kinda hopeful. Naive? You have to remember how die-hard a Snape supporter I was. I'm not hopeful for the idea that one person put forward on a group, that it's all a hoax, that Albus is secretly alive or anything. His death didn't bother me nearly as much as the brutal fact that Snape was the one who killed him. What I'm hopeful for is that the character Snape won't just resign himself to becomeing one of the bad guys. I would be extremely pissed of at JK Rowling if that were to happen.
Why I liked Snape in the first place was how complicated a character he was. I have read books before where evil was evil and good was good, and it never sat well with me. I can't let myself believe that JK Rowling would put us through all that character development for nothing.
So many things have indicated that Snape was more than he seemed:
Book 1: Snape saves Harry (without being asked to) at the quidditch match.
Book 2:
"...Then Professor McGonagall Arrived.
'It has happened,' she told the silent staff room. 'A student has been taken by the monster. Right into the Chamber itself.'
Professor Flitwick let out a squeel. Professor Sprout clapped her hands over her mouth. Snape gripped the back of his chair very hard and said, "How can you be sure?"
Book 5: When Harry is being held captive by Umbridge in her office, he yells that "Snuffles" is in danger, and Snape immediately sets off and oes an aweful lot of running around. First to Grimmauld Place to alert them, then back to the room (I'm guessing), then to the forest searching for Harry.
Book 6:
"And should it prove necessary... if it seems Draco will fail..." whispered Narcissia (Snape's hand twitched whithin hers..."
In OotP, JK Rowling went through all of the trouble to round out Snapes character, even leading us to feel sorry for him in the chapter "Snape's Worst Memory" (If you didn't feel bad, to hell with you!). Why would she bother doing this if in the end Snape will just end up being one more of the murduring evil hated flat characters like in so many stories?
And even if the final book doesn't provide any peace for the Snapeaholics, we can still think about many reasons why this whole horrible thing ended up happening:
1. The Unbreakable Vow, obviously. Snape is not a Gryffindor. I don't think he's noble or brave enough to sacrafice his own life for Dumbledore's. And I think he genuinely had a soft spot for Malfoy. A kid up to his ears in the dark arts, the same as Sirius said Snape had been.
2. His childhood (pretty obvious too). He was still bitter about his past. I'm assuming from book 5 that his home life sucked, we know his school days were akward and humiliating. The Dark Arts is probably the only place where he fit in.
In regard to his school days, I think more than his bitterness to the Marauders, some of his hatred transferred to Dumbledore.
From Book 3:
" He crossed the door and held it open for Snape, but Snape hadn't moved.
'You surely don't believe a word of Black's story?' Snape whispered, his eyes fixed on Dumbledore's face.
'I wish to speak to Harry and Hermione alone," Dumbledore repeated.
Snape took a step toward Dumbledore.
'Sirius Black showed he was capable of murder at the age of sixteen,' he breathed. 'You haven't forgotten that headmaster? You haven't forgotten that he once tried to kill me?'
I think that Dumbledore (we all know he isn't perfect) never took the whole Srieking Shack prank as seriously as he would if, say, a Slytherin would have done it. He probably does practice at least a little favoritism, right? I'm not saying anything against him, it's just what I suspect. I know he had to protect Remus from being exposed as a Werewolf, and therefore not draw too much attention to the whole thing, but Snape probably never got over the special treatment which (again I'm only speculating) was given to James, Sirius, etc.
It seems like I'm getting off topic, but I'm kinda looking over his whole character.
Perhapse the reason why Snape so often displayed "good guy" tendencies was because he truly thought Voldemort was gone, therefor had not reason to keep up his evil side. Kinda let himself go. Became one of the good guys, while the bad guys were seemingly gone forever.
Who knows.
I'll just end this by saying that if you (my Snape-loving comerades), like me, were a little too deeply disturbed by the fact that Snape killed Dumbledore, and now you're sort of lost (It's harder than people think to completely change your perception of a character), you can rest a bit more easily by just appreciating the fact that Severus Snape is still, as much as ever, a complex guy. What he did was under the belt. He's a monster for doing it. That accepted, now we can see how it turns out. I would like to believe that the story's not over for Severus Snape.
Besides. What Peter did was worse ;p