ife has it's little lessons...and it's not so little ones...(part 2)
More of loki's little lessons:
28) Trying to climb chain-link fences in pants with chains and straps is not a good idea. and neither is hanging upside down while your friends laugh at you.
29)Geese WILL attack when provoked...
30)It's really fun to scare people in parking garages, especially little mall crawling girls.
31)Nowadays little girls carry pepper spray....
32)DO NOT chase the bus and run out into traffic...
33)If they out number you, and are bigger than you....playing dead only makes their job easier.
34)DO NOT go towards the light! (that one's for Onixx)
35)You CAN'T time-travel with a Ceiling fan. (that ones for Xen)
36)If the pill glows....DON'T TAKE IT!!!
37)Don't listen to what it says if no one else can see it.....
38)Do not Eat a hippies Chilli! (that one's for monroe)
39)If you already puked twice, and tried to drink shampoo 'cause you thought it was vodka, don't say you aren't drunk.
40)Rubbing vicks all over your face and sticking your head out of the car when your going 70 down the freeway feels amazing!
41)Trying to Go-go dance when your completely plastered is not a good idea. people don't pay you as much when you puke on them...
42)Wash your pleather vest the day after the rave and don't let it just sit there for a week....otherwise the raver-funk is permanent...
41)Running naked across a bridge at 2 am is a bad idea...especially when its right next to a parking garage...that has security cameras.
42)Campus security frowns upon streaking....
43)You CAN delay a bus long enough for your friends to get back from Mcdonalds by pretending to pass out in the entryway...
44)If you ask who brought the alchohol and they tell you that you did, stop drinking...you had enough.
45)Pole-dancing on a lighpost at the jack in the box drive through doesn't go over too well.
46)Petting you cat is absolutely fascinating when you're rolling.
47)Cat's get contact highs very easily.
48)Cracked-out kitties are scary.
49)When all the employees at Victoria's secret know your name, it's time to tell your girls to go shopping without you.
50)Calling the bouncer names doesn't improve the situation.
51)When you start Kandi-stomping and you hear a cracking noise, it's time to sit down.
52)When someone passes out from drinking too much, don't draw all over their face. 'cause the next time you pass out around them, they wil do far worse.
53)If you wake up in bremerton with a really tall drag queen standing over you, Don't panic....SCREAM!
54)Screaming does not improve the mood of a hung-over drag queen.
55)Trying to climb Inside the crane game to get the neon green penguin plushee...just doesn't end well...
56)When the fire department has to show up at safeway to remove the raver that is stuck halfway inside the crane game machine...it's usually not the best time to ask for a job application. (That wasn't THIS summer, but I just had to share that story)
57)When jumping fences, run the fuck away if the pitbull isn't on a chain...
58)If you're friends and you are hiding, and your friend looks behind you and looks absolutely terrified...Don't bother turning around, just RUN!
59)Instant hand sanitizer is VERY flammable. (I knew this before, but I learned it the hard way)
60)After using instant hand-sanitizer, Smoking is a VERY bad idea.
61)When babysitting, watch the kids like a hawk when they say they want to make the kitty dizzy.
62)Cat's do not like dryers...
63)Cat's throw up twice their bodyweight when dizzy...
64)If people were drunk the night before, you probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is...
65)If you wake up, don't remember most of the previous night, and your pants are gone...you must've had a hell of a party!
66)Cellphones can be used to give great lightshows...
67)It's a bad sign when all the cops in maple valley know you by name.
68)Railing sugar and inhaling match smoke won't get you high, it WILL however give you a bloody nose, and the most intense sugar high you've ever had. *twitch twitch*
69)If you're trying to sneak into your house, DON'T bring the drunk guy.
(((THE END)))
(Not all of these happened THIS summer)
28) Trying to climb chain-link fences in pants with chains and straps is not a good idea. and neither is hanging upside down while your friends laugh at you.
29)Geese WILL attack when provoked...
30)It's really fun to scare people in parking garages, especially little mall crawling girls.
31)Nowadays little girls carry pepper spray....
32)DO NOT chase the bus and run out into traffic...
33)If they out number you, and are bigger than you....playing dead only makes their job easier.
34)DO NOT go towards the light! (that one's for Onixx)
35)You CAN'T time-travel with a Ceiling fan. (that ones for Xen)
36)If the pill glows....DON'T TAKE IT!!!
37)Don't listen to what it says if no one else can see it.....
38)Do not Eat a hippies Chilli! (that one's for monroe)
39)If you already puked twice, and tried to drink shampoo 'cause you thought it was vodka, don't say you aren't drunk.
40)Rubbing vicks all over your face and sticking your head out of the car when your going 70 down the freeway feels amazing!
41)Trying to Go-go dance when your completely plastered is not a good idea. people don't pay you as much when you puke on them...
42)Wash your pleather vest the day after the rave and don't let it just sit there for a week....otherwise the raver-funk is permanent...
41)Running naked across a bridge at 2 am is a bad idea...especially when its right next to a parking garage...that has security cameras.
42)Campus security frowns upon streaking....
43)You CAN delay a bus long enough for your friends to get back from Mcdonalds by pretending to pass out in the entryway...
44)If you ask who brought the alchohol and they tell you that you did, stop drinking...you had enough.
45)Pole-dancing on a lighpost at the jack in the box drive through doesn't go over too well.
46)Petting you cat is absolutely fascinating when you're rolling.
47)Cat's get contact highs very easily.
48)Cracked-out kitties are scary.
49)When all the employees at Victoria's secret know your name, it's time to tell your girls to go shopping without you.
50)Calling the bouncer names doesn't improve the situation.
51)When you start Kandi-stomping and you hear a cracking noise, it's time to sit down.
52)When someone passes out from drinking too much, don't draw all over their face. 'cause the next time you pass out around them, they wil do far worse.
53)If you wake up in bremerton with a really tall drag queen standing over you, Don't panic....SCREAM!
54)Screaming does not improve the mood of a hung-over drag queen.
55)Trying to climb Inside the crane game to get the neon green penguin plushee...just doesn't end well...
56)When the fire department has to show up at safeway to remove the raver that is stuck halfway inside the crane game machine...it's usually not the best time to ask for a job application. (That wasn't THIS summer, but I just had to share that story)
57)When jumping fences, run the fuck away if the pitbull isn't on a chain...
58)If you're friends and you are hiding, and your friend looks behind you and looks absolutely terrified...Don't bother turning around, just RUN!
59)Instant hand sanitizer is VERY flammable. (I knew this before, but I learned it the hard way)
60)After using instant hand-sanitizer, Smoking is a VERY bad idea.
61)When babysitting, watch the kids like a hawk when they say they want to make the kitty dizzy.
62)Cat's do not like dryers...
63)Cat's throw up twice their bodyweight when dizzy...
64)If people were drunk the night before, you probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is...
65)If you wake up, don't remember most of the previous night, and your pants are gone...you must've had a hell of a party!
66)Cellphones can be used to give great lightshows...
67)It's a bad sign when all the cops in maple valley know you by name.
68)Railing sugar and inhaling match smoke won't get you high, it WILL however give you a bloody nose, and the most intense sugar high you've ever had. *twitch twitch*
69)If you're trying to sneak into your house, DON'T bring the drunk guy.
(((THE END)))
(Not all of these happened THIS summer)