Chapter One of 'Hephaestus'- Beauty In the Bed

[lomonaaeren]

Title: Hephaestus
Disclaimer: J. K. Rowling and associates own these characters. I am writing this story for fun and not profit.
Pairings: Harry/Draco (present and past), past Harry/Ginny
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Disfigured!Harry, references to torture and violence, sex, profanity. DH spoilers but ignores epilogue.
Summary: When Harry returned from

Comments

[ttwistedtruth]

Amazing and unique! Harry's metal craft is really well-written and I can see where the Hephaestus allusion comes in. Believable characterization, as usual, and a moral dilemma that Draco has to go through... Could there be anything better?

I'm having a little difficulty with picturing Harry's disfigured face. There are ridges? His face is gray? Black? I can't wait to read more! -envies your fast posting ability-

[lomonaaeren]

Thank you!

Part of Draco wants to go through that dilemma. The rest is fighting it away as hard as he can, and resents Harry for making him think that there's anything he isn't capable of facing.

The ridges are both gray and black. It's crumpled like a tissue, really, with small stretches of flat skin in between.

[tray_la_la]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fdkszjfdsjflk

[lomonaaeren]

Thank you!

I think magic should cause injuries that are different from normal ones. Draco might have been able to live with ordinary injuries; more to the point, healers might have been able to cure them. So I gave Harry stranger scars.

And I know what you mean. I do pity Draco, but I think a big problem is that he just won't own up to the reason he's so revolted. And that's that he wonders what effect it will have on him, in the eyes of other people. And he does think of the scars as something catching emotionally, although he rationally knows they aren't.

This concept of metal-dancing has been in my head for a long time; I'm glad to have finally found a home for it.

Thanks, and I hope that you continue to like the fic!

[asdjhk]

Bottom!draco!! YES!
The only Draco I can read. Hah.

He would have done anything I asked if he really wanted to keep me, since I was doing him such a favor by staying with him.

Argh, Draco is such a pig! It will be interesting to see how he overcomes his disgust.

I like Harry very much here. I think it's more realistic for him to refuse to hide himself because of disfigurement than to withdraw from society out of shame.

[lomonaaeren]

For many reasons, Draco will need outside help to overcome his disgust.

And thank you! Harry's stubbornness helps, as does his memories of the fact that the wizarding world once celebrated him for a scar.

[aubergineautumn]

Some of your sentence structure is particularly worded and hard to follow. Example: His glance slid reluctantly over the chipped gray ridges and folds around Potter’s eyes and mouth that had once been skin; only because they had the eyes and lips and were bounded by crisp black hair and two ears could Draco think of them as a face.

only because they- think of them= referring to the ridges (of the face).

I guess it's technically correct, but I could only understand what the sentence meant by reading it all the way through, locating the pertinent word at the end of the sentence, face, that told me what you were talking about, and then re-reading the sentence all the way through and inserting (of the face). I think it is confusing because face is singular, so how could them (plural) be a face? Like I said, I guess you are technically correct, but it is particular.

still, love this concept, and looking forward to the next chapter.

[lomonaaeren]

Well, that was a sentence I did have trouble with, but I really couldn't think of any better way to phrase it.

And thank you!

[dm999]

Very interesting...please update soon!!!

[lomonaaeren]

Thanks. There's another chapter up now.