Comments | longing_rider: Chapter 6: Discovery in the Dark

longing_rider

Chapter 6: Discovery in the Dark

Sep 22, 2007 12:47

Well dear, hope this is enough for you to start, let me know what you think!

Another day was drawing to a close as the almighty Dictator once again left the main stone hall of his fortress, and was escorted by his guards towards the Blue Eyes temple. The deity of all dragons had been the guiding force of the Kingdom since it was built. Legends of ( Read more... )

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foryourdream September 25 2007, 02:15:16 UTC

Love the last two lines of the riddle - it's so sad and pretty-sounding! D= Up in the aforementioned attic, the magician girl was still in complete and utter shock. While waiting for dinner to be made, she stood at the window and stared out at the sky, trying to find a camel-shaped cloud. It was her habit, to find animals and shapes in the clouds when she wanted to be distracted from her lessons or from bad dreams. Yet all Mana could think about was that kiss ( ... )

Missed you dear, hope you are well. <3 longing_rider September 25 2007, 19:39:32 UTC

Well, you shall see what it means within the next chapter or so ^^ Glad you like it. Any thoughts on the way this chapter should go? Want anything to happen before Ameld decides to be wreckless and run off?

It was as the girl was pondering this that there was a knock on the door. Amelda leaned against the wall briefly, before placing a small tray down on the floor. The bravory to face Mana at that moment had faded the instant his knckles had rapped on the wood, causing him to immediately withdrawhis hand as if he had been burnt.

"Mana, your food is just in front of the door, eat it before it gets cold." he said softly.

How he wished he could find the courage to talk to her, but the task seemed impossible. After what he had done...it was better he was out of the way for now, and possibly for good.

With that last thought weighing him down, he turned around to made his way down the stairs.

Taking things a day at a time... Trying to be more positive and stuff. <3 foryourdream October 1 2007, 00:28:31 UTC

Well, how about the magician spy almost catching sight of them? After they reconcile here, they might go back out to do something? Or is that too soon?

Her emotions began racing as soon as he knocked on that door. There was a strange ache in her chest that didn't exist before. Oh, how much she wished for once that Mahaado was here to explain all these questions!

That was it. She just couldn't take it anymore!

Pulling open the door, she shouted rather unnecessarily, calling loudly, "AMELDA! Wait! Please!"

Her hand reached out to tug him back, apologies already waiting to pour out of her. Unfortunately, the magician girl completely forgot about the dinner he placed on the floor for her. Her foot made contact. As she lost her balance, she gave a short scream and began to fall towards the retreating thief.

Well, I hope it all works out. *cuddle* I'm here if you need me. ^_~ longing_rider October 1 2007, 18:57:56 UTC

Sounds good, I do think they can make up, but it still feels a little awkward between them I imagine (especially for Amelda XD). So to try and make it up to Mana, he could take her out to a local festival or something, that's where, they are nearly seen maybe? That should fill up the chapter nicely, with a little fluff thrown in of course. What do you think dear?In that instant, it was as if everything was in slow motion. The minute he looked around at the sound of the girls voice, Amelda stiffened at the sight tumbling towards him. Instinctivly, he could have stepped aside and got out out the way in time, but the first thing that came to mind was Mana's safety, not his own ( ... )

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