(no subject)
Apparently this is my month for J2 sitcom fusions? idek. I am also not actually totally happy with this, but in the (failed) spirit of my (failed) Nano, I am posting it anyway. Mostly so I can be rid of it and get on to doing MORE IMPORTANT THINGS like Sam and Dean's epic love etc.
Yeah.
Title: I Know Who I Wanna Take Me Home
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 3300.
Summary: So one day I was watching The Office and was like man Jim's hair kind of reminds me of Jared's. And now we have J2 Office AU. Jared's a paper salesman, Jensen is his sekrit engaged receptionist crush, and Kim Manners mostly just gets pranked.
Disclaimer: I make this shit up.
Jared doesn't exactly hate his job.
Granted, selling paper and paper supplies was not his childhood dream. But Jared had a ton of childhood dreams, none of which have ever really come to fruition, and most of which really shouldn't have come to fruition. He gets sick just being in planes, so astronaut? Not for him. He got knocked out in sixth grade by a rogue baseball, so that career was down the drain. His English degree isn't useless, but when he realized that he likes kids way better in small numbers, being a teacher also lost a lot of its appeal.
So every morning, he wakes up, trips over his dogs, finds a nice shirt and tie, and drags himself into work to sell some paper.
It helps a lot that the first thing he sees is Jensen at the receptionist desk.
"Hey, Jared," says Jensen, with a bright grin. It makes his eyes crinkle, and every morning, it is a struggle to not stalk across the entryway and kiss him breathless.
"Hey," he says instead, just like always. "Anything exciting happening?"
"Eric says we need to have a meeting later," says Jensen, sighing. "About tolerance. He was looking for you so you could talk about being gay."
Jared sighs, slumps his head against reception. "Wonderful. You think it's too late to make a run for it?"
"You know we're right in front of his office, right?"
"Is ruining all my dreams part of your job description?"
"I like to think of it as a perk," says Jensen. "And it might factor in to my Christmas bonus."
Jared shakes his head. "You're a sick man, Jensen Ackles. Sick."
Jensen shrugs easily. "Whatever, dude. It's your fault for being out and proud at this office."
Jensen has never once given Jared shit about being gay. He's never done that fucking thing that straight guys do, where they get weird because of course, every gay guy wants to fuck them.
Granted, Jared really, really wants to fuck Jensen. So it's kind of ironic that Jensen doesn't realize it even a little.
"As long as he doesn't make me explain how gay sex works to him again, I'm good."
Jensen laughs. "I wish I'd seen that."
"Aww, Jensen, you don't have to wait for Eric to ask. I'll explain gay sex to you any time you want."
"You're too good to me, Padalecki," says Jensen. "Get to your desk. People are trying to work here."
"Yeah," says Jared. "I wouldn't want to distract you from your really busy day."
Jensen flips him off good-naturedly before turning back to his computer, still smiling, and Jared's stomach does a little flip.
Yeah, it's just another day at the office.
*
Jensen was the first person Jared met at work. At their first meeting, Jared felt a connection he'd never had with anyone else, the kind of connection he figured people made up. He'd been pretty sure Jensen felt it too, joking with him like they were old friends in no time, giving him a tour of the office with helpful commentary on every crazy person who worked there.
He'd been so sure.
"Hey!" he said, drifting to reception as his lunch break approached. "Want to grab lunch with me?"
Jensen beamed, eyes crinkling, and Jared was already so gone. "Yeah, absolutely, man. I'll show you the best place."
"Insider secret, huh?" asks Jared.
"Yeah, you don't get to hear about it until you've been working here as long as me."
"And how long is that again?"
"Not telling, dude. I'll get depressed."
Conversation kept being easy through lunch, and Jared was about five minutes away from asking Jensen out to dinner when Jensen's phone rang.
"Oh, man, it's Mel, I better get this. Sorry?" he said, looking sheepish.
Jared waved his hand.
"Hey!" said Jensen. "Yeah, I'm at lunch. Showing a new coworker the ropes," he said, angling a grin at Jared. "Seems like a decent enough guy, yeah. I can start dinner, yeah. Yeah. Love you too," he said, hanging up.
Jared worked very hard to maintain his calm.
"My fiancee, Melanie," said Jensen, ducking his head to smile at the table.
Jared's heart clenched, but he managed a smile. "When's the wedding?"
Jensen's face fell, just a little. "We're not sure yet. I mean, you know. Receptionist isn't really a big bread-winning job. She wants to wait until I've, uh. Yeah."
Jared didn't push back then. In the year since then, he's picked up bits and pieces of Jensen's life, of his relationship with Melanie.
They're high school sweethearts, Jensen and Melanie. And she's not a bad person, but--Jared's biased, sure, but there's more to it than that. She and Jensen just don't click together. Melanie still wants Jensen to make something more of himself. She wants him to get promoted, to become the boss like Eric, or something. But Jensen wants to be a musician; Jared still remembers the only time he's ever heard Jensen sing, after work and the bar one day while Melanie was gone. He can still hear Jensen's low voice, the strum of the guitar. He loves the sound of Jensen's voice.
Melanie doesn't think Jensen could make it, and Jared--Jared isn't sure Jensen is the kind of guy who's cut out for the life of a celebrity. He doesn't think Jensen wants that either--he seems happy getting gigs on the side, working in reception. Well, maybe not happy, but...content.
Jared thinks, honestly, that he could push Jensen over into happiness.
If he just got a chance.
*
"So we haven't done nearly enough to mess with Kim this week," says Jared, leaning against reception.
"It's Tuesday," says Jensen.
"Exactly, Tuesday! And we've done nothing."
"He's probably really lulled into a false sense of security," Jensen agrees.
"I was thinking crank calls," Jared says.
*Kind of cliche. You losing your creativity, Padalecki?"
"You got a better idea?"
Jensen smirks.
Twenty minutes later, all of Kim's desk stuff is in the vending machine, and Jared wants to kiss Jensen until they can't breathe.
*
Jensen slouches down next to Jared, his head lolling onto Jared's shoulder. Their bar stools are close together, and Jared can smell him. It's hard not to stiffen, just to protect himself.
"Tell me not to quit my job."
"Don't quit your job," says Jared. "I'd kill myself."
Jensen tilts his head to grin. "Yeah, you would." He straightens up and orders a beer.
"Why is that even an option?"
Jensen takes a quick swig. "There's some job I'm not qualified for Melanie wants me to get."
"Definitely don't quit before you get something else." Jared kicks at Jensen's foot. "What job?"
"Uh...consultant? Jesus, what do I know about consulting? And, yeah, the money's good, but I'd have to be traveling, like, all the time. No time for the band, no time for her, no time for my friends, no time for you..."
Jared swallows. "Especially if you weren't at Dunder Mifflin anymore."
"Exactly. I dunno, man. Maybe I'm just not supposed to make money. It's just not meant to be."
"You should try modeling," says Jared, poking him in the cheek. "You've got that pretty face..."
"Just when I think you couldn't get any gayer, you prove me wrong," Jensen says, shaking his head. "Modeling? Where do you get this shit?"
Jared ducks his head. "Are you really looking for other jobs?"
Jensen sighs. "I guess I have to. It means a lot to Mel, you know?"
"You really could do better. You know that, right? Receptionist can't be the height of your ambitions."
"I dunno," says Jensen, stretching. "It's not, like...I'm twenty-six, you know? I don't have to have everything figured out yet."
"You try telling Melanie that?"
Jensen smiles, a little crooked. "Yeah, well. She said if I wasn't in a rush to get a real job, I shouldn't be in a rush to get married."
Jared coughs. "Jesus."
Jensen shrugs, downs his beer. "She's got a point, right?"
"Marriage shouldn't be something she uses like...blackmail, Jensen," says Jared. He knows he shouldn't, but he can't help it. "That's not how it should work."
Unsurprisingly, Jensen looks uncomfortable, fidgets a little. "It's not like that."
"I know, man, it's just..." Jared rubs his face. "Never mind. Sorry. It's none of my business."
"Yeah, it is," says Jensen, and that doesn't help, not at all.
*
It was easier before the two of them became friends. They'd been work friends from the beginning, but Jared gets along with almost everyone at the office without actually hanging out. And just seeing Jensen at work, that hadn't been as bad. It had been harder to say, with that blinding certainty, that they would work, only being in the office. It was easier to keep Jensen separate from his real life, to pretend.
"Hey, man, uh," Jensen had said after work, a few months in to the job. "Listen, you want to come out with me and my friends tonight?"
Jared blinked. "What?"
"I think my friends think I'm making you up, because I used to pretty much bitch about everyone at work." Jensen shook his head quickly. "Never mind. It was stupid."
"No, no! I want to. I was just surprised. I'd like to come."
Jensen grinned.
Jared probably would have saved himself a lot of trouble if he'd said no.
Then again, maybe not.
*
Jared knows there is, in theory, a pretty simple solution to his problems. That is, suck it up and tell Jensen how he feels.
He's just not sure what part of his feelings he should be confessing. If he talks about how bad Melanie is for Jensen, he almost gives up his hopes of talking about how he feels; Jared doesn't want to make Jensen think he only dislikes Melanie because he wants Jensen for himself. He doesn't even dislike her. He just thinks that the two of them are together more out of habit than anything else. That Jensen has been with her for so long, he's never considered an alternative.
"Calling in sick tomorrow," Jensen tells him, in low tones, over lunch. Jared ducks his head closer, conspiratorially.
"Yeah?" he asks. "Exciting day?"
"Job interview," Jensen admits. "For another job."
Jared swallows. "What job?"
"Entry level, publishing," says Jensen. "Found it myself, not Mel. I figured...it's worth a look, right?"
Jared swallows. "If you want it, yeah."
Jensen nods. "Yeah, man. You--you were right, you know? This isn't it. This isn't what I want to be doing for the rest of my life."
"You were right too," Jared points out. "You're still young."
Jensen laughs at that. "Jesus, you make me sound like some fifty-year-old dude in a midlife crisis."
"I don't think that's what that sounds like."
"If it makes Mel happy, and it might make me happy, that's enough, right?" Jensen says finally.
Jared doesn't say anything.
*
i got the job, is the text Jared gets Thursday night.
grats
i'm giving eric my 2 weeks
Jensen picks up on the second ring. "Hey."
"Are you happy?" Jared asks, in a rush.
"What?"
"Are you happy?"
"Yeah."
Jared swallows. "Do you ever think you could be happier?"
"Are you drunk?"
"No, I'm just--never mind. I'm happy for you."
"Thanks. You know you're not getting rid of me this easy, right?"
Jared swallows. Nothing about getting rid of Jensen Ackles is ever going to be easy.
"Yeah, man. I know."
*
"An office," says Eric, a week later, "is like a family. And what Jensen is telling me is that he doesn't want to be a part of the family. Jensen wants to be disowned."
"I told him to say divorced, but does he listen?" asks Jensen, leaning over so he can whisper to Jared.
"So we will not be having a go-away party," Eric continues. "We will be having a return party. For when, just like in the bible, the prodigal son returns. And we welcome him. Even though he shit on us."
"I think Eric skimmed the Bible," Jared whispers back.
"So good riddance Jensen, we know you'll be back."
"Yeah, I work through next week," Jensen points out.
"Well, whatever," says Eric. "You're dead to me."
"I'll miss you too, boss," says Jensen, saluting.
"We still have a week to pull as many pranks on Kim as we can," Jared points out.
Jensen grins. "I knew I kept you around for a reason, Padalecki."
*
Jared loses it on Jensen's last Wednesday.
"You're making a mistake," is what he says.
Jensen turns. They're in the parking lot, alone; they ended up staying late to move Kim's desk into the bathroom.
"What?" Jensen asks.
"Melanie," is what comes out. "Jensen, she's--look, she's a great girl, but. Man, I've seen you two together. And you guys are comfortable and fine, but she wants you to be something you're not. She wants you to stop singing, she wants you to ditch Chris, she...she doesn't get you. And not being a receptionist, that's great. But you've told me dick about this new job. All I've got is that it's in publishing. If you really wanted this, you wouldn't be able to shut up about it. Like when you've got a new gig. But you're...Jesus, Jensen. You're making a mistake."
It's dark, and Jared can't quite make out Jensen's expression. His voice is tight when he speaks, and Jared steps closer, so he can see Jensen's face. It's shut down, almost blank. "Sounds like you think I'm making a lot of mistakes."
Jared swallows. "Yeah. I do. I think you're taking a job that's not right for you so you can marry a girl who's not right for you and live a life that's not right for you."
"And you know what's right for me."
Jared lets out a long breath. "Yeah. I do."
And then he kisses Jensen.
*
Later, Jared will be unsure exactly what happened. He will know that Jensen's lips were cold, and that the kiss was quick; a press of closed lips, and then he pulled away.
He will know Jensen was still for what seemed like forever, but probably wasn't very long.
He will know that at some point, Jensen moved, went to his car without saying anything, and drove away.
He will know he went to his car sometime later, drove home, and climbed into bed without getting undressed.
He will know he fucked everything up.
*
Jensen misses his last two days of work, and Jared feels like the world's shittiest human being. He didn't mean to make everything terrible, but he pretty much did. He spends his weekend beating himself up while his roommate makes fun of him. He doesn't know what he expected would happen; it was probably his douchiest love confession ever. Because he doesn't have any right to say he knows exactly what Jensen needs. He doesn't know Jensen would be happier.
He has no clue.
He thinks about calling in sick on Monday, because about half the office has noticed he's in love with Jensen, and the ones who haven't still know they're pretty much best friends--were best friends, anyway--but he guesses it's not going to be better if he puts it off.
Jared trips over his dogs, finds an unrumpled shirt and clean tie, and drags himself into work to sell some paper.
"Hey, Jared," says Jensen. He's not grinning. He's smiling a little, though, a quiet smile, a contented smile, and Jared trips over his own feet and nearly slams into the reception desk. "Dude," says Jensen. "You suck."
"God," Jared breathes. "What are you doing here?"
"Working," says Jensen. "You should try it."
"Uh," says Jared. "What about..."
Jensen looks down, and Jared knows, without being able to see him, that whatever expression he had has broken, and he's showing how he really feels. Jared doesn't know how that is. "You were right."
Jared swallows. He doesn't know what to say.
"It wasn't really me."
"Was it a good job?"
"Pay cut," says Jensen. "She thought the prospects were better, but I'm not sure."
"So you're staying."
"Yeah." He's still looking down. "This and gigs is enough to get my own place on."
Jared thinks his chest might actually break. "Your own place?"
"Dude," says Jensen, "don't flatter yourself. You're hot, but I didn't break up with my girl just for you."
Jared wants to toss back a retort, but he's having trouble breathing. "But it was a little for me," he says.
Jensen lets out a huff of a laugh. "This probably needs to wait until after work."
"Yeah," says Jared, still dazed.
Jensen smiles. "You're a good friend, you know that?"
"No," says Jared. "I really didn't."
*
Jared spends half the rest of the day freaking out about the way he possibly ruined Jensen's entire life. He told Jensen to not take a job that might have been better for him, and to break up with his fiancee, and he maybe made him gay.
Jared's the shittiest friend, seriously.
Halfway through the day, Eric announces it's time for the Prodigal's Return Party.
"He didn't leave," Sera points out.
"Doesn't matter," says Eric. "He missed a few days last week. And he nearly left. So he's returned."
Jensen, surprisingly, doesn't object.
Instead, as soon as the party is underway (party being, as it always is at Dunder Mifflin, something of an overstatement; mostly everyone is in the conference room, arguing about cake and offensive party games), Jensen drags Jared out into the hall.
"We need to talk," says Jensen as he pulls, and Jared follows willingly, caught between excitement and utter, embarrassing, pants-wetting terror.
"We do?"
"Yeah," breathes Jensen, stopping in the hall.
But he doesn't start talking. Instead he grabs Jared's head and pulls him down to kiss him.
It's one hell of a kiss--Jensen is so fucking eager, Jared is actually a little concerned some part of him is going to get eaten. And Jared, without thinking about it, surges back, because Jensen is kissing him. And for a while, it's just the two of them making out in the hall, so good Jared can't even think.
When he starts thinking, he realizes this is bad.
"Jensen," he manages, carefully pulling away and planting his hands firmly on Jensen's chest. "What the hell?"
Jensen looks perplexed. "Dude, I thought you wanted that."
"I--Yeah, but--Jesus! You just broke up with your fiancee and quit your job and now you're jumping me in the hall?"
"Pretty much," Jensen agrees.
Jared runs his hand through his hair. "I can't just--dude, I can't be some rebound thing. I can't."
"Cuz you're in love with me," Jensen supplies, and Jared's head shoots up so fast he's afraid he's going to get whiplash. Jensen smirks a little. "Hey, once you kissed me and told me all my life choices were wrong, it wasn't that hard to figure out."
Jared rubs his forehead.
Jensen catches his arm. "You're not some rebound thing."
Jared laughs, a little hollowly. "You say that now."
"How about Friday?" asks Jensen.
"Pretty sure you're gonna say that on Friday too."
"I've got a gig, loser," says Jensen. "Chris is in town and I'm doing back up for him. You wanna get dinner and then come?"
Jared blinks. "Yeah."
"Then it's a date," says Jensen, grinning, and Jared's stomach flips over.
*
In retrospect, Jared thinks that he probably shouldn't have made out with Jensen in the car like a horny teenager after the gig, given his plan was to not be a rebound fling. But Jensen was singing and looking right at him and when he got off stage he was sweaty and happy and Jared was so in love with him, he thought he might die.
And when Jensen calls him up the next day and asks if he's free, he definitely doesn't feel like a rebound, not even a little.
He feels happy.
He's willing to try going with it.
Yeah.
Title: I Know Who I Wanna Take Me Home
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 3300.
Summary: So one day I was watching The Office and was like man Jim's hair kind of reminds me of Jared's. And now we have J2 Office AU. Jared's a paper salesman, Jensen is his sekrit engaged receptionist crush, and Kim Manners mostly just gets pranked.
Disclaimer: I make this shit up.
Jared doesn't exactly hate his job.
Granted, selling paper and paper supplies was not his childhood dream. But Jared had a ton of childhood dreams, none of which have ever really come to fruition, and most of which really shouldn't have come to fruition. He gets sick just being in planes, so astronaut? Not for him. He got knocked out in sixth grade by a rogue baseball, so that career was down the drain. His English degree isn't useless, but when he realized that he likes kids way better in small numbers, being a teacher also lost a lot of its appeal.
So every morning, he wakes up, trips over his dogs, finds a nice shirt and tie, and drags himself into work to sell some paper.
It helps a lot that the first thing he sees is Jensen at the receptionist desk.
"Hey, Jared," says Jensen, with a bright grin. It makes his eyes crinkle, and every morning, it is a struggle to not stalk across the entryway and kiss him breathless.
"Hey," he says instead, just like always. "Anything exciting happening?"
"Eric says we need to have a meeting later," says Jensen, sighing. "About tolerance. He was looking for you so you could talk about being gay."
Jared sighs, slumps his head against reception. "Wonderful. You think it's too late to make a run for it?"
"You know we're right in front of his office, right?"
"Is ruining all my dreams part of your job description?"
"I like to think of it as a perk," says Jensen. "And it might factor in to my Christmas bonus."
Jared shakes his head. "You're a sick man, Jensen Ackles. Sick."
Jensen shrugs easily. "Whatever, dude. It's your fault for being out and proud at this office."
Jensen has never once given Jared shit about being gay. He's never done that fucking thing that straight guys do, where they get weird because of course, every gay guy wants to fuck them.
Granted, Jared really, really wants to fuck Jensen. So it's kind of ironic that Jensen doesn't realize it even a little.
"As long as he doesn't make me explain how gay sex works to him again, I'm good."
Jensen laughs. "I wish I'd seen that."
"Aww, Jensen, you don't have to wait for Eric to ask. I'll explain gay sex to you any time you want."
"You're too good to me, Padalecki," says Jensen. "Get to your desk. People are trying to work here."
"Yeah," says Jared. "I wouldn't want to distract you from your really busy day."
Jensen flips him off good-naturedly before turning back to his computer, still smiling, and Jared's stomach does a little flip.
Yeah, it's just another day at the office.
*
Jensen was the first person Jared met at work. At their first meeting, Jared felt a connection he'd never had with anyone else, the kind of connection he figured people made up. He'd been pretty sure Jensen felt it too, joking with him like they were old friends in no time, giving him a tour of the office with helpful commentary on every crazy person who worked there.
He'd been so sure.
"Hey!" he said, drifting to reception as his lunch break approached. "Want to grab lunch with me?"
Jensen beamed, eyes crinkling, and Jared was already so gone. "Yeah, absolutely, man. I'll show you the best place."
"Insider secret, huh?" asks Jared.
"Yeah, you don't get to hear about it until you've been working here as long as me."
"And how long is that again?"
"Not telling, dude. I'll get depressed."
Conversation kept being easy through lunch, and Jared was about five minutes away from asking Jensen out to dinner when Jensen's phone rang.
"Oh, man, it's Mel, I better get this. Sorry?" he said, looking sheepish.
Jared waved his hand.
"Hey!" said Jensen. "Yeah, I'm at lunch. Showing a new coworker the ropes," he said, angling a grin at Jared. "Seems like a decent enough guy, yeah. I can start dinner, yeah. Yeah. Love you too," he said, hanging up.
Jared worked very hard to maintain his calm.
"My fiancee, Melanie," said Jensen, ducking his head to smile at the table.
Jared's heart clenched, but he managed a smile. "When's the wedding?"
Jensen's face fell, just a little. "We're not sure yet. I mean, you know. Receptionist isn't really a big bread-winning job. She wants to wait until I've, uh. Yeah."
Jared didn't push back then. In the year since then, he's picked up bits and pieces of Jensen's life, of his relationship with Melanie.
They're high school sweethearts, Jensen and Melanie. And she's not a bad person, but--Jared's biased, sure, but there's more to it than that. She and Jensen just don't click together. Melanie still wants Jensen to make something more of himself. She wants him to get promoted, to become the boss like Eric, or something. But Jensen wants to be a musician; Jared still remembers the only time he's ever heard Jensen sing, after work and the bar one day while Melanie was gone. He can still hear Jensen's low voice, the strum of the guitar. He loves the sound of Jensen's voice.
Melanie doesn't think Jensen could make it, and Jared--Jared isn't sure Jensen is the kind of guy who's cut out for the life of a celebrity. He doesn't think Jensen wants that either--he seems happy getting gigs on the side, working in reception. Well, maybe not happy, but...content.
Jared thinks, honestly, that he could push Jensen over into happiness.
If he just got a chance.
*
"So we haven't done nearly enough to mess with Kim this week," says Jared, leaning against reception.
"It's Tuesday," says Jensen.
"Exactly, Tuesday! And we've done nothing."
"He's probably really lulled into a false sense of security," Jensen agrees.
"I was thinking crank calls," Jared says.
*Kind of cliche. You losing your creativity, Padalecki?"
"You got a better idea?"
Jensen smirks.
Twenty minutes later, all of Kim's desk stuff is in the vending machine, and Jared wants to kiss Jensen until they can't breathe.
*
Jensen slouches down next to Jared, his head lolling onto Jared's shoulder. Their bar stools are close together, and Jared can smell him. It's hard not to stiffen, just to protect himself.
"Tell me not to quit my job."
"Don't quit your job," says Jared. "I'd kill myself."
Jensen tilts his head to grin. "Yeah, you would." He straightens up and orders a beer.
"Why is that even an option?"
Jensen takes a quick swig. "There's some job I'm not qualified for Melanie wants me to get."
"Definitely don't quit before you get something else." Jared kicks at Jensen's foot. "What job?"
"Uh...consultant? Jesus, what do I know about consulting? And, yeah, the money's good, but I'd have to be traveling, like, all the time. No time for the band, no time for her, no time for my friends, no time for you..."
Jared swallows. "Especially if you weren't at Dunder Mifflin anymore."
"Exactly. I dunno, man. Maybe I'm just not supposed to make money. It's just not meant to be."
"You should try modeling," says Jared, poking him in the cheek. "You've got that pretty face..."
"Just when I think you couldn't get any gayer, you prove me wrong," Jensen says, shaking his head. "Modeling? Where do you get this shit?"
Jared ducks his head. "Are you really looking for other jobs?"
Jensen sighs. "I guess I have to. It means a lot to Mel, you know?"
"You really could do better. You know that, right? Receptionist can't be the height of your ambitions."
"I dunno," says Jensen, stretching. "It's not, like...I'm twenty-six, you know? I don't have to have everything figured out yet."
"You try telling Melanie that?"
Jensen smiles, a little crooked. "Yeah, well. She said if I wasn't in a rush to get a real job, I shouldn't be in a rush to get married."
Jared coughs. "Jesus."
Jensen shrugs, downs his beer. "She's got a point, right?"
"Marriage shouldn't be something she uses like...blackmail, Jensen," says Jared. He knows he shouldn't, but he can't help it. "That's not how it should work."
Unsurprisingly, Jensen looks uncomfortable, fidgets a little. "It's not like that."
"I know, man, it's just..." Jared rubs his face. "Never mind. Sorry. It's none of my business."
"Yeah, it is," says Jensen, and that doesn't help, not at all.
*
It was easier before the two of them became friends. They'd been work friends from the beginning, but Jared gets along with almost everyone at the office without actually hanging out. And just seeing Jensen at work, that hadn't been as bad. It had been harder to say, with that blinding certainty, that they would work, only being in the office. It was easier to keep Jensen separate from his real life, to pretend.
"Hey, man, uh," Jensen had said after work, a few months in to the job. "Listen, you want to come out with me and my friends tonight?"
Jared blinked. "What?"
"I think my friends think I'm making you up, because I used to pretty much bitch about everyone at work." Jensen shook his head quickly. "Never mind. It was stupid."
"No, no! I want to. I was just surprised. I'd like to come."
Jensen grinned.
Jared probably would have saved himself a lot of trouble if he'd said no.
Then again, maybe not.
*
Jared knows there is, in theory, a pretty simple solution to his problems. That is, suck it up and tell Jensen how he feels.
He's just not sure what part of his feelings he should be confessing. If he talks about how bad Melanie is for Jensen, he almost gives up his hopes of talking about how he feels; Jared doesn't want to make Jensen think he only dislikes Melanie because he wants Jensen for himself. He doesn't even dislike her. He just thinks that the two of them are together more out of habit than anything else. That Jensen has been with her for so long, he's never considered an alternative.
"Calling in sick tomorrow," Jensen tells him, in low tones, over lunch. Jared ducks his head closer, conspiratorially.
"Yeah?" he asks. "Exciting day?"
"Job interview," Jensen admits. "For another job."
Jared swallows. "What job?"
"Entry level, publishing," says Jensen. "Found it myself, not Mel. I figured...it's worth a look, right?"
Jared swallows. "If you want it, yeah."
Jensen nods. "Yeah, man. You--you were right, you know? This isn't it. This isn't what I want to be doing for the rest of my life."
"You were right too," Jared points out. "You're still young."
Jensen laughs at that. "Jesus, you make me sound like some fifty-year-old dude in a midlife crisis."
"I don't think that's what that sounds like."
"If it makes Mel happy, and it might make me happy, that's enough, right?" Jensen says finally.
Jared doesn't say anything.
*
i got the job, is the text Jared gets Thursday night.
grats
i'm giving eric my 2 weeks
Jensen picks up on the second ring. "Hey."
"Are you happy?" Jared asks, in a rush.
"What?"
"Are you happy?"
"Yeah."
Jared swallows. "Do you ever think you could be happier?"
"Are you drunk?"
"No, I'm just--never mind. I'm happy for you."
"Thanks. You know you're not getting rid of me this easy, right?"
Jared swallows. Nothing about getting rid of Jensen Ackles is ever going to be easy.
"Yeah, man. I know."
*
"An office," says Eric, a week later, "is like a family. And what Jensen is telling me is that he doesn't want to be a part of the family. Jensen wants to be disowned."
"I told him to say divorced, but does he listen?" asks Jensen, leaning over so he can whisper to Jared.
"So we will not be having a go-away party," Eric continues. "We will be having a return party. For when, just like in the bible, the prodigal son returns. And we welcome him. Even though he shit on us."
"I think Eric skimmed the Bible," Jared whispers back.
"So good riddance Jensen, we know you'll be back."
"Yeah, I work through next week," Jensen points out.
"Well, whatever," says Eric. "You're dead to me."
"I'll miss you too, boss," says Jensen, saluting.
"We still have a week to pull as many pranks on Kim as we can," Jared points out.
Jensen grins. "I knew I kept you around for a reason, Padalecki."
*
Jared loses it on Jensen's last Wednesday.
"You're making a mistake," is what he says.
Jensen turns. They're in the parking lot, alone; they ended up staying late to move Kim's desk into the bathroom.
"What?" Jensen asks.
"Melanie," is what comes out. "Jensen, she's--look, she's a great girl, but. Man, I've seen you two together. And you guys are comfortable and fine, but she wants you to be something you're not. She wants you to stop singing, she wants you to ditch Chris, she...she doesn't get you. And not being a receptionist, that's great. But you've told me dick about this new job. All I've got is that it's in publishing. If you really wanted this, you wouldn't be able to shut up about it. Like when you've got a new gig. But you're...Jesus, Jensen. You're making a mistake."
It's dark, and Jared can't quite make out Jensen's expression. His voice is tight when he speaks, and Jared steps closer, so he can see Jensen's face. It's shut down, almost blank. "Sounds like you think I'm making a lot of mistakes."
Jared swallows. "Yeah. I do. I think you're taking a job that's not right for you so you can marry a girl who's not right for you and live a life that's not right for you."
"And you know what's right for me."
Jared lets out a long breath. "Yeah. I do."
And then he kisses Jensen.
*
Later, Jared will be unsure exactly what happened. He will know that Jensen's lips were cold, and that the kiss was quick; a press of closed lips, and then he pulled away.
He will know Jensen was still for what seemed like forever, but probably wasn't very long.
He will know that at some point, Jensen moved, went to his car without saying anything, and drove away.
He will know he went to his car sometime later, drove home, and climbed into bed without getting undressed.
He will know he fucked everything up.
*
Jensen misses his last two days of work, and Jared feels like the world's shittiest human being. He didn't mean to make everything terrible, but he pretty much did. He spends his weekend beating himself up while his roommate makes fun of him. He doesn't know what he expected would happen; it was probably his douchiest love confession ever. Because he doesn't have any right to say he knows exactly what Jensen needs. He doesn't know Jensen would be happier.
He has no clue.
He thinks about calling in sick on Monday, because about half the office has noticed he's in love with Jensen, and the ones who haven't still know they're pretty much best friends--were best friends, anyway--but he guesses it's not going to be better if he puts it off.
Jared trips over his dogs, finds an unrumpled shirt and clean tie, and drags himself into work to sell some paper.
"Hey, Jared," says Jensen. He's not grinning. He's smiling a little, though, a quiet smile, a contented smile, and Jared trips over his own feet and nearly slams into the reception desk. "Dude," says Jensen. "You suck."
"God," Jared breathes. "What are you doing here?"
"Working," says Jensen. "You should try it."
"Uh," says Jared. "What about..."
Jensen looks down, and Jared knows, without being able to see him, that whatever expression he had has broken, and he's showing how he really feels. Jared doesn't know how that is. "You were right."
Jared swallows. He doesn't know what to say.
"It wasn't really me."
"Was it a good job?"
"Pay cut," says Jensen. "She thought the prospects were better, but I'm not sure."
"So you're staying."
"Yeah." He's still looking down. "This and gigs is enough to get my own place on."
Jared thinks his chest might actually break. "Your own place?"
"Dude," says Jensen, "don't flatter yourself. You're hot, but I didn't break up with my girl just for you."
Jared wants to toss back a retort, but he's having trouble breathing. "But it was a little for me," he says.
Jensen lets out a huff of a laugh. "This probably needs to wait until after work."
"Yeah," says Jared, still dazed.
Jensen smiles. "You're a good friend, you know that?"
"No," says Jared. "I really didn't."
*
Jared spends half the rest of the day freaking out about the way he possibly ruined Jensen's entire life. He told Jensen to not take a job that might have been better for him, and to break up with his fiancee, and he maybe made him gay.
Jared's the shittiest friend, seriously.
Halfway through the day, Eric announces it's time for the Prodigal's Return Party.
"He didn't leave," Sera points out.
"Doesn't matter," says Eric. "He missed a few days last week. And he nearly left. So he's returned."
Jensen, surprisingly, doesn't object.
Instead, as soon as the party is underway (party being, as it always is at Dunder Mifflin, something of an overstatement; mostly everyone is in the conference room, arguing about cake and offensive party games), Jensen drags Jared out into the hall.
"We need to talk," says Jensen as he pulls, and Jared follows willingly, caught between excitement and utter, embarrassing, pants-wetting terror.
"We do?"
"Yeah," breathes Jensen, stopping in the hall.
But he doesn't start talking. Instead he grabs Jared's head and pulls him down to kiss him.
It's one hell of a kiss--Jensen is so fucking eager, Jared is actually a little concerned some part of him is going to get eaten. And Jared, without thinking about it, surges back, because Jensen is kissing him. And for a while, it's just the two of them making out in the hall, so good Jared can't even think.
When he starts thinking, he realizes this is bad.
"Jensen," he manages, carefully pulling away and planting his hands firmly on Jensen's chest. "What the hell?"
Jensen looks perplexed. "Dude, I thought you wanted that."
"I--Yeah, but--Jesus! You just broke up with your fiancee and quit your job and now you're jumping me in the hall?"
"Pretty much," Jensen agrees.
Jared runs his hand through his hair. "I can't just--dude, I can't be some rebound thing. I can't."
"Cuz you're in love with me," Jensen supplies, and Jared's head shoots up so fast he's afraid he's going to get whiplash. Jensen smirks a little. "Hey, once you kissed me and told me all my life choices were wrong, it wasn't that hard to figure out."
Jared rubs his forehead.
Jensen catches his arm. "You're not some rebound thing."
Jared laughs, a little hollowly. "You say that now."
"How about Friday?" asks Jensen.
"Pretty sure you're gonna say that on Friday too."
"I've got a gig, loser," says Jensen. "Chris is in town and I'm doing back up for him. You wanna get dinner and then come?"
Jared blinks. "Yeah."
"Then it's a date," says Jensen, grinning, and Jared's stomach flips over.
*
In retrospect, Jared thinks that he probably shouldn't have made out with Jensen in the car like a horny teenager after the gig, given his plan was to not be a rebound fling. But Jensen was singing and looking right at him and when he got off stage he was sweaty and happy and Jared was so in love with him, he thought he might die.
And when Jensen calls him up the next day and asks if he's free, he definitely doesn't feel like a rebound, not even a little.
He feels happy.
He's willing to try going with it.