(no subject)
Title: Call Me, Call Me
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: PG
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 3000ish.
Summary: Jensen's not the best at dating. Also, he's possibly a little bi. Possibly just for the hot guy at his gym.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
Jensen really isn't that shy. He's just bad at meeting people, which is different. He hates bars--really, who likes bars? They're a means to an end, at best--and he's never understood those people who can just walk up to a stranger and strike up a conversation.
He does flirt with women. At the gym, for example--it's pretty easy at the gym. Jensen knows he's good-looking, and the way he looks in his workout clothes certainly doesn't hurt. Of course, most of the time when he's at the gym, the only person who's hitting on him is Jared.
And Jared--well, Jared's just confusing.
Jensen isn't gay. He knows he's not gay. There's a chance that he's bi; it's something he has thought about and considered. But Jared is--he's hot. He's definitely hot and he's got a great body and an amazing smile, and he flirts like he was born for it. Every day they're both there, Jared will look him up and down, slow grin growing on his face, and say, "Come here often?"
And Jensen will roll his eyes, give Jared the finger, and say, "First time."
Jared will laugh and say, "Oh, I can tell."
The actual first time they met, Jared asked him out. Absolutely no question about it; Jared smiled, a little shyly, cocked his head, and said, "Want to get dinner with me?"
"I'm, uh," Jensen said. "I'm not really--I'm straight."
"Oh," said Jared, flushing. "Sorry, man."
And they'd been purely platonic (aside from a little harmless flirting on Jared's end) for a while, until Jensen started noticing just how good-looking Jared was, just how--anyway.
Jensen isn't shy, is the point. He just has trouble with dating.
"You're gonna die alone at this rate, Jen," says Steve.
"I am not," says Jensen, to his beer.
"You would," says Chris, "if we weren't awesome friends."
"So what am I gonna do now?" asks Jensen.
Steve puts his laptop on Jensen's lap. Jensen stares in mute horror for a minute.
"Like it?" asks Chris.
"You signed me up for match.com, Chris? Seriously?"
"Steve helped."
"Come on, chicks dig guys who online date."
"How would you know?" asks Jensen.
Steve shrugs.
"Dude, don't tell me you're on match."
"That's why I'm getting laid and you're not."
Jensen glances over his profile. It's accurate, even if it doesn't sound much like him, and he guesses it couldn't hurt. He just.
"Isn't this lame?" asks Jensen.
"You're lame," Chris points out.
"Fuck you."
So Jensen isn't shy or a failure or any of that, but he ends up online dating anyway, through no fault of his own.
*
The thing is, Jensen sucks at online dating. He's pretty sure he's supposed to be trying to set up dates with girls, but mostly he ends up getting pissed because they spell too many words incorrectly or have a lot of numbers in their usernames or other completely irrational issues. They just all seem so similar and he doesn't know how to pick between them. Even the attractive ones, he's not ready to e-mail them. What's he supposed to say? He doesn't know how to start these conversations.
Finally, a girl winks at him.
Her username is kate1033, she's 25, and she's a student. Her pictures show a happy, smiling girl, not beautiful, but not bad-looking.
Jensen winks back. He thinks about e-mailing.
what do i say in email, he texts Steve.
say hi, Steve replies.
kate1033 saves him the trouble, though, sends a long e-mail about her life, her likes, her dislikes, and Jensen doesn't think they have anything in common. He wonders how he turns someone down on match.com, and ends up e-mailing back, and before he knows it, he and Kate have a date.
"I hate you," he tells Steve, before he takes off.
"You don't have to be in love to get laid," says Steve.
"She likes ponies," says Jensen.
"Have fun," says Steve, and Jensen flips him off.
*
"Oh my gosh, you're even cuter in person," is the first thing Kate says to him.
She's not. She's not bad looking, she's just--he's not into her. At all. Jensen wonders if he can fake an emergency call from a relative. People do that on TV all the time; it seems to work for them.
"Nice to meet you," he says, holding out his hand.
She shakes enthusiastically. "So you're a physical therapist? That's so cool."
"Really?" asks Jensen. It sounds a lot like sucking up.
"Oh yeah, I bet you give awesome massages."
"Yeah," says Jensen. "Let's, uh, get a table."
"Awesome," says Kate.
Jensen can't really agree on that one.
*
"Woah!"
Jensen's thinking so hard about how to ditch not only Kate but ihearthollywood99, lala_babie, and pollywollymolly that he doesn't even notice when he walks straight into Jared in the gym.
Jared is very close and very tall and he's got a firm grip on Jensen's shoulders. He smells clean and fresh, and his hair is wet--he must have just showered, must be on his way out.
Jensen swallows. "Sorry."
Jared grins easily. "No problem. What's up?"
"Just, uh." He swallows again. "Just a little distracted."
"Yeah? You seem pretty stressed. You heading out?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Want to get some coffee, talk about it?" Jensen starts to say no, and Jared holds up both his hands. "I'm not hitting on you, I swear. You just look like you could use a drink and a friendly ear."
Jensen considers. "Yeah, I guess I maybe could."
*
A few minutes later, Jared's flirting easily with the barista at Starbucks and getting them a couple of lattes.
Jensen sort of stares, a little awestruck.
Jared cocks his head, still smiling. "What?"
"I thought you were gay."
"I am. I'm not going to sleep with her."
Jensen shakes his head as they head to a booth. He's never gotten people who can just . . . do that.
"So what's wrong?"
"My friends."
"What about them?"
Jensen takes a chug of coffee. "They think I need to date."
Jared grins. "See, I agree with them. And I just happen to be single and available."
Jensen drinks some more coffee, to avoid answering. "Anyway," he says. "They're setting me up on--blind dates. And I don't like any of the girls, but I don't know how to let them down easy."
Jared nods, his face back to serious. "Just tell 'em it's not working. It's not a big deal, Jensen. Dates don't work out all the time."
"I just--man, is chemistry really an okay reason to say no? They're all good girls, you know? There's nothing--"
"It's a good reason, I promise," says Jared. "If you can just know about people, you can know either way, you know?"
Jensen blinks, not having followed that at all. "Not really."
"You believe in love at first sight?"
"No."
"Okay," says Jared, nodding. "Well, I do. And if you can see someone and just . . . know you could love them? You can see someone and know they're not right for you too, you know?"
"I guess."
"So just tell them that. Tell them you still want to be friends, if it makes you feel better."
Jensen can't help laughing a little. "That works for you, doesn't it? That whole let's be friends line."
"Hey, I'm awesome," says Jared. "Everyone wants to be my friend."
"Right, of course." Jensen shakes his head. "Thanks for taking me out, man."
"Trust me," says Jared with a wink, "the pleasure's all mine."
Jensen almost chokes on his coffee. He wonders, suddenly, what Jared thought when they first met. What Jared wanted them to become.
*
When he gets home, he starts looking around for guys on match. Just--it seems kind of safe. He can do a few dates, see how he feels about the whole. Men thing. And it's the coward's way out of those girls, because match.com won't let him be bisexual. Which is kind of a lot of pressure this early in his quest for a sexual identity, but it's the internet. It doesn't count.
And he doesn't actually mind if kate1033 thinks she turned him gay. It's kind of hilarious, actually.
He still can't actually bring himself to hit on guys, though, so he changes his preferences, closes his laptop, and goes to sleep, figuring it'll be better in the morning.
*
In three days, Jensen's got winks and e-mails from ten different guys. Four of the e-mails are pretty obscene with a lot of in-depth descriptions of what the senders think Jensen can do with his lips, and most of the winks are from pretty illegitimate-looking guys. Jensen's not ready for a hook-up yet. He needs to ease into it.
But there's one e-mail and two winks that look okay. He winks back at tgardner45 and ollieoxen, and then he checks the e-mail from jaytpuppy.
Jensen's not sure about the username, and the guy doesn't have an e-mail, which the paranoid, shallow part of him thinks is a sign he's ugly. But it's a good e-mail, he thinks. He likes the guy.
Hey, man,
So, full disclosure, I'm pretty bad at these e-mails. I'm more of an in-person kind of guy, you know? But it's worth a shot, right?
Anyway, I saw in your profile that you like photography, which is seriously cool. Although I dunno if I could actually go out with a Mavs fan. There are lines that can't be crossed.
I'm gonna stop this now. My profile's got my info, so I won't bore you with it again. If you want to chat, just send me an e-mail back. Maybe we could meet up sometime. Whatever you want.
*
Hi.
Don't worry, I'm pretty bad at it myself. It was my friends' idea to get me on here, and I'm still kind of pissed at them, to tell the truth. I don't think match.com is really the right social network for me. But I was going through a pretty major dry spell before this, so I can't blame them.
See, I told you I sucked at this. That's not the kind of stuff you're supposed to say in the first e-mail.
But, yeah, I'm pretty in to photography. Not a career or anything, just a hobby, but I think I'm pretty good. And it's fun, you know. Trust me, get a beer in me and I can talk your ear off about it. But I won't bore you with that yet.
Jesus, the Spurs? You're right, this isn't going to work out.
*
"So how's the online dating scene?" asks Chris.
Jensen nearly chokes on his beer.
"Not for me," he says, pretending he didn't check his e-mail like six times today, hoping he got a response from jaytpuppy. He didn't even know why he's so excited about it, he just--he's got a good feeling.
He wonders if this is what Jared was talking about, then decides probably not.
"Seriously? Man, what are you even looking for?"
Jensen looks morosely into his beer. "They're just--man, none of them are for me."
"There are a billion girls on there. One of them's got to be your type, man."
Jensen leans back. "I'm," he clears his throat. "I'm thinking of trying out guys. For a while."
There's a pause.
Finally, Chris says, "Match.com turn you gay, son?"
Jensen thinks he prefers that to Jared turning him gay. Or bi. Or whatever.
"I just . . . might like guys," he says, resting his forehead on the table. "A little."
"Hey, it's not like we care, man. Just get your dick in someone."
"Or someone else's dick in you," says Steve. "Whatever floats your boat."
"Thanks. Really."
"So, any dates with any guys yet?"
Jensen stretches. "Supposed to meet this guy named Oliver for drinks tomorrow."
"He hot?"
Jensen shrugs. "He's okay. I dunno. I'm just--seeing how it is."
"This is a really gay sexual crisis, Jen."
"Fuck you."
*
Oliver is 5'8" or so, skinny and twinky, and Jensen doesn't think they're going to work out either. He doesn't feel any more comfortable than he had with Kate.
"Listen," he says, swallowing, "you're a nice guy, but--"
"You're not actually gay," says Oliver.
"I think I might be. But, uh. You're not--my type, I guess? I didn't really know I had a type."
"But you do," says Oliver, sounding amused.
When Jensen closes his eyes, he sees Jared, tall and broad and grinning, easy and happy.
"Yeah," he agrees. "I guess I do."
"Well, it's a shame I'm not it," says Oliver, "because you're seriously hot."
Jensen laughs. "You know, everyone on match tells me that."
"They've got a point," says Oliver.
*
Hey, I hear you on the meddling friends thing. My little sister actually set up this account for me, so the lame name? Totally her fault. I don't even know why she did it, I'm real friendly.
I'd like to buy you a beer and listen to you ramble, I think. I'm kind of a rambler myself. Makes me feel less alone when someone else is doing it. And you don't sound boring, I promise.
So you're born and raised Dallas, I guess? No one else could like the Mavs.
*
You've got a little sister who likes to hook you up too? Mine's always calling me and telling me she met the nicest girl.
. . . Full disclosure, I guess: I just figured out I'm bi. Still not that sure about it. I mean, there're some guys I've thought are hot, but I've never dated anyone. So if you don't want to talk to me anymore, I get it.
Richardson, not Dallas. Came to Austin for college, never left. You're from San Antonio?
*
Travis wants to go to the movies. He's about Jensen's height, decently muscular, kind of hot. But Jensen's not actually ready to make out with him in the back row of the theater, which seems to piss him off.
"I thought you wanted to have a good time," says Travis, on their way out.
"Jesus, I'm not that easy."
"Everyone knows movies are for making out, man. What did you think I wanted?"
"To go on a date!" says Jensen.
"Whatever," Travis mutters. "Knew you looked like a tease."
Jensen watches him storm off and sighs.
So far, match.com is not for him.
*
Hey, everyone's gotta start somewhere, right?
Yeah, I'm from San Antonio. You want to get a drink sometime and I'll tell you all about it?
*
Yeah. But full disclosure:
1. I'm not putting out on the first date.
2. Drinks isn't a euphemism for anything else.
3. I'm a picky bastard.
4. I've got a type.
5. It's maybe this really hot guy from my gym, I'm not sure.
6. This might not go anywhere.
Just so you know.
*
Seven o'clock tonight? You know Dryden's?
*
Yeah, okay.
*
Jensen wipes his palms on his jeans. He's nervous like he hasn't been for any of his other dates, nervous in a way he hasn't been in a while. He likes this guy, and he doesn't even know his name, or his phone number. He hadn't realized it, somehow, had no idea that hadn't happened until he arrived at the bar and realized he was going to greet this guy as "puppy."
Assuming he shows up at all.
Jensen knows he needs to just go in and get it over with, but he can't even--he hasn't even seen this guy. It feels like a set-up, almost, because he realizes now jaytpuppy has all the cards, and he's standing outside a bar he doesn't know, stressing out.
"It won't bite," says a voice right next to his ear.
Jensen whirls around and Jared catches him, strong arms on his shoulders.
"Woah," says Jared, and then smiles. "We gotta stop meeting like this."
"Jared?"
"I hear I'm your type."
Jensen blushes a dull red before he realizes that this is not what he should be doing.
"That was you?"
Jared rubs the back of his neck, looks sad. "I didn't mean to. I was just--man, I saw you on there and I couldn't help it. Since you never give me the time of day in the real world, I was just--" Jared's blushing now too, looking sad. "I was gonna tell you. I just wanted to see if you'd give it a try if you didn't know it was me."
Jensen has to laugh.
"You were on match.com! Looking for guys!" Jared objects. "I thought I just wasn't your type!"
Jensen keeps laughing--Jared is honestly kind of adorable, and he looks so nervous, and he thinks Jensen doesn't like him, doesn't realize he's almost single-handedly responsible for Jensen's sexuality crisis.
"Shut up! I thought you--god, do you have any idea--"
Jensen grins, and Jared stops talking, looks kind of dazed. "Want to get a drink?" he asks.
"Yeah," says Jared. "Thought you'd never ask."
*
Jensen doesn't put out, but when Jared tries to leave without a kiss goodnight, Jensen drags him down and doesn't let go for a long time.
He closes his match.com account as soon as he gets home.
Internet dating really isn't his thing.
Author: chash
Fandom: Supernatural RPS
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: PG
Warnings: None?
Word Count: 3000ish.
Summary: Jensen's not the best at dating. Also, he's possibly a little bi. Possibly just for the hot guy at his gym.
Disclaimer: Lies and untruths.
Jensen really isn't that shy. He's just bad at meeting people, which is different. He hates bars--really, who likes bars? They're a means to an end, at best--and he's never understood those people who can just walk up to a stranger and strike up a conversation.
He does flirt with women. At the gym, for example--it's pretty easy at the gym. Jensen knows he's good-looking, and the way he looks in his workout clothes certainly doesn't hurt. Of course, most of the time when he's at the gym, the only person who's hitting on him is Jared.
And Jared--well, Jared's just confusing.
Jensen isn't gay. He knows he's not gay. There's a chance that he's bi; it's something he has thought about and considered. But Jared is--he's hot. He's definitely hot and he's got a great body and an amazing smile, and he flirts like he was born for it. Every day they're both there, Jared will look him up and down, slow grin growing on his face, and say, "Come here often?"
And Jensen will roll his eyes, give Jared the finger, and say, "First time."
Jared will laugh and say, "Oh, I can tell."
The actual first time they met, Jared asked him out. Absolutely no question about it; Jared smiled, a little shyly, cocked his head, and said, "Want to get dinner with me?"
"I'm, uh," Jensen said. "I'm not really--I'm straight."
"Oh," said Jared, flushing. "Sorry, man."
And they'd been purely platonic (aside from a little harmless flirting on Jared's end) for a while, until Jensen started noticing just how good-looking Jared was, just how--anyway.
Jensen isn't shy, is the point. He just has trouble with dating.
"You're gonna die alone at this rate, Jen," says Steve.
"I am not," says Jensen, to his beer.
"You would," says Chris, "if we weren't awesome friends."
"So what am I gonna do now?" asks Jensen.
Steve puts his laptop on Jensen's lap. Jensen stares in mute horror for a minute.
"Like it?" asks Chris.
"You signed me up for match.com, Chris? Seriously?"
"Steve helped."
"Come on, chicks dig guys who online date."
"How would you know?" asks Jensen.
Steve shrugs.
"Dude, don't tell me you're on match."
"That's why I'm getting laid and you're not."
Jensen glances over his profile. It's accurate, even if it doesn't sound much like him, and he guesses it couldn't hurt. He just.
"Isn't this lame?" asks Jensen.
"You're lame," Chris points out.
"Fuck you."
So Jensen isn't shy or a failure or any of that, but he ends up online dating anyway, through no fault of his own.
*
The thing is, Jensen sucks at online dating. He's pretty sure he's supposed to be trying to set up dates with girls, but mostly he ends up getting pissed because they spell too many words incorrectly or have a lot of numbers in their usernames or other completely irrational issues. They just all seem so similar and he doesn't know how to pick between them. Even the attractive ones, he's not ready to e-mail them. What's he supposed to say? He doesn't know how to start these conversations.
Finally, a girl winks at him.
Her username is kate1033, she's 25, and she's a student. Her pictures show a happy, smiling girl, not beautiful, but not bad-looking.
Jensen winks back. He thinks about e-mailing.
what do i say in email, he texts Steve.
say hi, Steve replies.
kate1033 saves him the trouble, though, sends a long e-mail about her life, her likes, her dislikes, and Jensen doesn't think they have anything in common. He wonders how he turns someone down on match.com, and ends up e-mailing back, and before he knows it, he and Kate have a date.
"I hate you," he tells Steve, before he takes off.
"You don't have to be in love to get laid," says Steve.
"She likes ponies," says Jensen.
"Have fun," says Steve, and Jensen flips him off.
*
"Oh my gosh, you're even cuter in person," is the first thing Kate says to him.
She's not. She's not bad looking, she's just--he's not into her. At all. Jensen wonders if he can fake an emergency call from a relative. People do that on TV all the time; it seems to work for them.
"Nice to meet you," he says, holding out his hand.
She shakes enthusiastically. "So you're a physical therapist? That's so cool."
"Really?" asks Jensen. It sounds a lot like sucking up.
"Oh yeah, I bet you give awesome massages."
"Yeah," says Jensen. "Let's, uh, get a table."
"Awesome," says Kate.
Jensen can't really agree on that one.
*
"Woah!"
Jensen's thinking so hard about how to ditch not only Kate but ihearthollywood99, lala_babie, and pollywollymolly that he doesn't even notice when he walks straight into Jared in the gym.
Jared is very close and very tall and he's got a firm grip on Jensen's shoulders. He smells clean and fresh, and his hair is wet--he must have just showered, must be on his way out.
Jensen swallows. "Sorry."
Jared grins easily. "No problem. What's up?"
"Just, uh." He swallows again. "Just a little distracted."
"Yeah? You seem pretty stressed. You heading out?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Want to get some coffee, talk about it?" Jensen starts to say no, and Jared holds up both his hands. "I'm not hitting on you, I swear. You just look like you could use a drink and a friendly ear."
Jensen considers. "Yeah, I guess I maybe could."
*
A few minutes later, Jared's flirting easily with the barista at Starbucks and getting them a couple of lattes.
Jensen sort of stares, a little awestruck.
Jared cocks his head, still smiling. "What?"
"I thought you were gay."
"I am. I'm not going to sleep with her."
Jensen shakes his head as they head to a booth. He's never gotten people who can just . . . do that.
"So what's wrong?"
"My friends."
"What about them?"
Jensen takes a chug of coffee. "They think I need to date."
Jared grins. "See, I agree with them. And I just happen to be single and available."
Jensen drinks some more coffee, to avoid answering. "Anyway," he says. "They're setting me up on--blind dates. And I don't like any of the girls, but I don't know how to let them down easy."
Jared nods, his face back to serious. "Just tell 'em it's not working. It's not a big deal, Jensen. Dates don't work out all the time."
"I just--man, is chemistry really an okay reason to say no? They're all good girls, you know? There's nothing--"
"It's a good reason, I promise," says Jared. "If you can just know about people, you can know either way, you know?"
Jensen blinks, not having followed that at all. "Not really."
"You believe in love at first sight?"
"No."
"Okay," says Jared, nodding. "Well, I do. And if you can see someone and just . . . know you could love them? You can see someone and know they're not right for you too, you know?"
"I guess."
"So just tell them that. Tell them you still want to be friends, if it makes you feel better."
Jensen can't help laughing a little. "That works for you, doesn't it? That whole let's be friends line."
"Hey, I'm awesome," says Jared. "Everyone wants to be my friend."
"Right, of course." Jensen shakes his head. "Thanks for taking me out, man."
"Trust me," says Jared with a wink, "the pleasure's all mine."
Jensen almost chokes on his coffee. He wonders, suddenly, what Jared thought when they first met. What Jared wanted them to become.
*
When he gets home, he starts looking around for guys on match. Just--it seems kind of safe. He can do a few dates, see how he feels about the whole. Men thing. And it's the coward's way out of those girls, because match.com won't let him be bisexual. Which is kind of a lot of pressure this early in his quest for a sexual identity, but it's the internet. It doesn't count.
And he doesn't actually mind if kate1033 thinks she turned him gay. It's kind of hilarious, actually.
He still can't actually bring himself to hit on guys, though, so he changes his preferences, closes his laptop, and goes to sleep, figuring it'll be better in the morning.
*
In three days, Jensen's got winks and e-mails from ten different guys. Four of the e-mails are pretty obscene with a lot of in-depth descriptions of what the senders think Jensen can do with his lips, and most of the winks are from pretty illegitimate-looking guys. Jensen's not ready for a hook-up yet. He needs to ease into it.
But there's one e-mail and two winks that look okay. He winks back at tgardner45 and ollieoxen, and then he checks the e-mail from jaytpuppy.
Jensen's not sure about the username, and the guy doesn't have an e-mail, which the paranoid, shallow part of him thinks is a sign he's ugly. But it's a good e-mail, he thinks. He likes the guy.
Hey, man,
So, full disclosure, I'm pretty bad at these e-mails. I'm more of an in-person kind of guy, you know? But it's worth a shot, right?
Anyway, I saw in your profile that you like photography, which is seriously cool. Although I dunno if I could actually go out with a Mavs fan. There are lines that can't be crossed.
I'm gonna stop this now. My profile's got my info, so I won't bore you with it again. If you want to chat, just send me an e-mail back. Maybe we could meet up sometime. Whatever you want.
*
Hi.
Don't worry, I'm pretty bad at it myself. It was my friends' idea to get me on here, and I'm still kind of pissed at them, to tell the truth. I don't think match.com is really the right social network for me. But I was going through a pretty major dry spell before this, so I can't blame them.
See, I told you I sucked at this. That's not the kind of stuff you're supposed to say in the first e-mail.
But, yeah, I'm pretty in to photography. Not a career or anything, just a hobby, but I think I'm pretty good. And it's fun, you know. Trust me, get a beer in me and I can talk your ear off about it. But I won't bore you with that yet.
Jesus, the Spurs? You're right, this isn't going to work out.
*
"So how's the online dating scene?" asks Chris.
Jensen nearly chokes on his beer.
"Not for me," he says, pretending he didn't check his e-mail like six times today, hoping he got a response from jaytpuppy. He didn't even know why he's so excited about it, he just--he's got a good feeling.
He wonders if this is what Jared was talking about, then decides probably not.
"Seriously? Man, what are you even looking for?"
Jensen looks morosely into his beer. "They're just--man, none of them are for me."
"There are a billion girls on there. One of them's got to be your type, man."
Jensen leans back. "I'm," he clears his throat. "I'm thinking of trying out guys. For a while."
There's a pause.
Finally, Chris says, "Match.com turn you gay, son?"
Jensen thinks he prefers that to Jared turning him gay. Or bi. Or whatever.
"I just . . . might like guys," he says, resting his forehead on the table. "A little."
"Hey, it's not like we care, man. Just get your dick in someone."
"Or someone else's dick in you," says Steve. "Whatever floats your boat."
"Thanks. Really."
"So, any dates with any guys yet?"
Jensen stretches. "Supposed to meet this guy named Oliver for drinks tomorrow."
"He hot?"
Jensen shrugs. "He's okay. I dunno. I'm just--seeing how it is."
"This is a really gay sexual crisis, Jen."
"Fuck you."
*
Oliver is 5'8" or so, skinny and twinky, and Jensen doesn't think they're going to work out either. He doesn't feel any more comfortable than he had with Kate.
"Listen," he says, swallowing, "you're a nice guy, but--"
"You're not actually gay," says Oliver.
"I think I might be. But, uh. You're not--my type, I guess? I didn't really know I had a type."
"But you do," says Oliver, sounding amused.
When Jensen closes his eyes, he sees Jared, tall and broad and grinning, easy and happy.
"Yeah," he agrees. "I guess I do."
"Well, it's a shame I'm not it," says Oliver, "because you're seriously hot."
Jensen laughs. "You know, everyone on match tells me that."
"They've got a point," says Oliver.
*
Hey, I hear you on the meddling friends thing. My little sister actually set up this account for me, so the lame name? Totally her fault. I don't even know why she did it, I'm real friendly.
I'd like to buy you a beer and listen to you ramble, I think. I'm kind of a rambler myself. Makes me feel less alone when someone else is doing it. And you don't sound boring, I promise.
So you're born and raised Dallas, I guess? No one else could like the Mavs.
*
You've got a little sister who likes to hook you up too? Mine's always calling me and telling me she met the nicest girl.
. . . Full disclosure, I guess: I just figured out I'm bi. Still not that sure about it. I mean, there're some guys I've thought are hot, but I've never dated anyone. So if you don't want to talk to me anymore, I get it.
Richardson, not Dallas. Came to Austin for college, never left. You're from San Antonio?
*
Travis wants to go to the movies. He's about Jensen's height, decently muscular, kind of hot. But Jensen's not actually ready to make out with him in the back row of the theater, which seems to piss him off.
"I thought you wanted to have a good time," says Travis, on their way out.
"Jesus, I'm not that easy."
"Everyone knows movies are for making out, man. What did you think I wanted?"
"To go on a date!" says Jensen.
"Whatever," Travis mutters. "Knew you looked like a tease."
Jensen watches him storm off and sighs.
So far, match.com is not for him.
*
Hey, everyone's gotta start somewhere, right?
Yeah, I'm from San Antonio. You want to get a drink sometime and I'll tell you all about it?
*
Yeah. But full disclosure:
1. I'm not putting out on the first date.
2. Drinks isn't a euphemism for anything else.
3. I'm a picky bastard.
4. I've got a type.
5. It's maybe this really hot guy from my gym, I'm not sure.
6. This might not go anywhere.
Just so you know.
*
Seven o'clock tonight? You know Dryden's?
*
Yeah, okay.
*
Jensen wipes his palms on his jeans. He's nervous like he hasn't been for any of his other dates, nervous in a way he hasn't been in a while. He likes this guy, and he doesn't even know his name, or his phone number. He hadn't realized it, somehow, had no idea that hadn't happened until he arrived at the bar and realized he was going to greet this guy as "puppy."
Assuming he shows up at all.
Jensen knows he needs to just go in and get it over with, but he can't even--he hasn't even seen this guy. It feels like a set-up, almost, because he realizes now jaytpuppy has all the cards, and he's standing outside a bar he doesn't know, stressing out.
"It won't bite," says a voice right next to his ear.
Jensen whirls around and Jared catches him, strong arms on his shoulders.
"Woah," says Jared, and then smiles. "We gotta stop meeting like this."
"Jared?"
"I hear I'm your type."
Jensen blushes a dull red before he realizes that this is not what he should be doing.
"That was you?"
Jared rubs the back of his neck, looks sad. "I didn't mean to. I was just--man, I saw you on there and I couldn't help it. Since you never give me the time of day in the real world, I was just--" Jared's blushing now too, looking sad. "I was gonna tell you. I just wanted to see if you'd give it a try if you didn't know it was me."
Jensen has to laugh.
"You were on match.com! Looking for guys!" Jared objects. "I thought I just wasn't your type!"
Jensen keeps laughing--Jared is honestly kind of adorable, and he looks so nervous, and he thinks Jensen doesn't like him, doesn't realize he's almost single-handedly responsible for Jensen's sexuality crisis.
"Shut up! I thought you--god, do you have any idea--"
Jensen grins, and Jared stops talking, looks kind of dazed. "Want to get a drink?" he asks.
"Yeah," says Jared. "Thought you'd never ask."
*
Jensen doesn't put out, but when Jared tries to leave without a kiss goodnight, Jensen drags him down and doesn't let go for a long time.
He closes his match.com account as soon as he gets home.
Internet dating really isn't his thing.