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Part Two
"I have this theory," says Jared, leaning down to whisper in Jensen's ear while the Lord Chancellor of Lycindia drones on about the glorious union of two destined souls, "that royal weddings were made for people who had no desire to actually be married to each other."
Jensen raises his eyebrows, giving Jared a kind of pitying look. Jared wants to kiss him, but given they aren't officially married yet, he thinks he isn't supposed to. "Yeah?"
"Well," says Jared. "If everyone getting married was as excited about the wedding night as I am, there is no way the ceremony would be this long."
Jensen shivers slightly, but manages to keep his voice even, quiet, and sarcastic.
Jared absolutely adores him.
"Between this and trying to drag me into closets, I'm starting to think you're marrying me for my body," Jensen says.
"You tried to drag me into closets too," Jared points out. Chad, unfortunately, has some sort of preternatural ability to guess where Jared and Jensen try to escape to, and was somehow always waiting wherever they ended up, casual, as if he just liked spending time in deserted hallways and dark rooms.
"And I only want your body," Jensen shoots back. "So you see my point." Jared's father turns slightly to give them both a look, and Jared smiles sheepishly. It's rude to talk through someone else's wedding, but it's unthinkable to talk through one's own.
Part of the problem is that, being a royal wedding, everyone is very interested in maintaining tradition and being formal and proper. The other problem is that, being as it's a wedding between two royals, they have to uphold the traditions of both Genovia and Lycindia. Which mostly means that there are two incredibly long ceremonies they have to go through, and Jared really wants the whole thing to just be over, and he and Jensen can go off to Jared's family's summer home in Tyre.
"That's where I met Danneel," he'd explained to Jensen, when they were deciding where to go. "When we were kids. She agreed to help me figure out a way to hide my identity as Mycroft, and cover for me."
"And you'll be totally safe there," Chad added. "No one knows about it."
"But I should still try all your food, to be on the safe side," said Kevin. He and Chad had struck up some sort of terrifying friendship, which Jared thinks will go nowhere good.
"Clearly," said Jensen. Jared was pretty sure Jensen secretly liked him.
Jensen squeezes his hand, and Jared realizes they've reached a part of the ceremony where he's supposed to talk.
"This I swear," Jared says quickly. This is pretty much all he has to say the whole time. He'll say it a lot, and since it's all about loving Jensen, he'll mean it.
The Lord Chancellor keeps droning on, and Jared sighs, and wonders when they'll be able to leave.
The look his father gives him when he starts slouching tells him that it'll be a while.
*
"I think I need to try the cake first," says Kevin.
"I probably should too," says Chad. "Kev's been a food taster for a while. He might've developed an immunity."
"That's true," says Kevin.
"If he has an immunity, he's a useless food taster," Jensen points out.
"Maybe I'm not," says Kevin. "I bet I'm not."
"Kevin," says Nick. "You tried every ingredient as this was being made."
"But maybe something was in the oven."
"If we don't eat this cake in two minutes, I'm going to kill Kevin myself," says Jared. "So you guys eat up, and then get going."
The Jonases are supposed to be going ahead of them to "secure the property," which Jared assumes means they'll explore and eat all the food and possibly make a pillow fort.
Kevin and Chad try the cake, pronounce it safe, and then Jared and Jensen are expected to try it. All the guests gather close, excited to see their first moments together as a married couple. Personally, Jared thinks those moments should probably be private.
There are about ten thousand people at the wedding, Jared estimates. It's by-invitation-only, but he and Jensen both invited a lot of people, and then there are all the lords and advisers, and Jensen's father wanted to invite a random selection of regular citizens, so it feels like a zoo.
They eat cake together, and everyone cheers, and then they're expected to sit and accept blessings and congratulations from everyone.
"Let's never get married again," Jared whispers.
"Deal," says Jensen.
*
"I didn't see this coming," says Milo, shaking his head when he gets to the thrones.
"Whatever, you're jealous I got married first," says Jared, grinning. "Meggie still thinks you have cooties."
Jensen had been pretty concerned when he found out Milo was coming to the wedding; apparently that story Jared had cooked up about Milo wanting to kill him had gotten around.
"He's actually a good friend," said Jared. "He's going to marry my sister."
"After he kills you?" Jensen asked warily.
"Yeah," said Jared, rolling his eyes, "I require everyone to kill me before they can marry my sister."
"You look like you want to be anywhere else," Milo tells Jared.
"That obvious?" asks Jared.
"Only like five hundred to go," says Jensen, squinting at the line.
"Oh good," says Jared. "You want to tag in, Milo? Pretend to be me?"
"I'm not tall enough," says Milo. He smiles. "Seriously, congratulations. And not just because I'm totally going to be king now."
"Well," says Jared, "as long as it's not just that."
*
It's ten o'clock by the time Chad is finally ushering them into the carriage, and Jared falls asleep almost at once.
It's not exactly the wedding night he'd imagined, but Jensen's drooling on his shoulder, and it really could be a lot worse.
*
Chad seems to feel it would be dangerous to stop at inns, so they just switch carriage drivers occasionally and stay in the carriage all the time.
"I think he's enjoying us not having our wedding night," Jensen grumbles. "Your bodyguard is a jerk."
"Your bodyguards are crazy," says Jared. "So, you know. We're even."
Jensen slams his head against the cushion of the carriage. "We should have eloped."
"Princes don't elope."
"Well," says Jensen, grinning. "I'm a pretty sucky prince."
It's pretty difficult to do anything remotely fun trapped in the back of a carriage, even a royal carriage, but they manage somehow.
*
When they finally get to Tyre, it's the middle of the night, and Jensen is drooling on Jared's shoulder.
"Hey," says Chad, opening the door. "We're here."
"My legs hurt."
"Bitch, bitch, bitch," says Chad. "No one is going to try to kill you here."
"No one is going to try to kill us at all."
Chad rolls his eyes. "This is why you need a bodyguard," he says. "Because you are a total dumbass."
"Thanks for the support."
Chad shrugs. "Come on. Get your sleeping beauty and let's go."
Jared shakes Jensen's shoulder, but he just makes a sleepy noise, so Jared picks him up gently and cradles him close.
"Aww," says Chad. "You guys are disgusting."
"Don't be jealous just because no one loves you."
"Whatever, Kevin's totally gonna give in and get with me any day now."
Jared nearly drops Jensen. "You're hitting on Kevin?"
"He lives a life of danger," says Chad. "I can dig that."
"I am not thinking about this," says Jared. "We are going inside, and I am going to pretend I never heard any of this."
"You know you're carrying him across the threshold, right?"
"I'm trying to ignore that," says Jared.
Of course, as soon as they get to the door, Kevin says, "You're carrying him across the threshold! That's so cute."
"You two deserve each other," Jared mutters.
He gets up to the top of the stairs and gets into their bedroom, noticing that someone--probably Kevin--has strewn rosepetals over the bed.
"Romantic," Jared mutters, putting Jensen down. Jensen mumbles something, turns over in bed, and Jared shakes his head, pulling Jensen's shoes off. "You know," he adds, "this was not how I pictured spending our first night together in a real bed."
He shrugs off his own clothes and pushes the blankets back, scattering rose petals onto the floor. He maneuvers Jensen under the covers and wraps his arms around him, feels Jensen relax against him.
"Okay," Jared admits, nuzzling the back of Jensen's neck. "It's not so bad."
Besides, there's always tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that. They're married, Jared realizes, and feels a grin spreading over his face.
They've got all the time in the world.
"I have this theory," says Jared, leaning down to whisper in Jensen's ear while the Lord Chancellor of Lycindia drones on about the glorious union of two destined souls, "that royal weddings were made for people who had no desire to actually be married to each other."
Jensen raises his eyebrows, giving Jared a kind of pitying look. Jared wants to kiss him, but given they aren't officially married yet, he thinks he isn't supposed to. "Yeah?"
"Well," says Jared. "If everyone getting married was as excited about the wedding night as I am, there is no way the ceremony would be this long."
Jensen shivers slightly, but manages to keep his voice even, quiet, and sarcastic.
Jared absolutely adores him.
"Between this and trying to drag me into closets, I'm starting to think you're marrying me for my body," Jensen says.
"You tried to drag me into closets too," Jared points out. Chad, unfortunately, has some sort of preternatural ability to guess where Jared and Jensen try to escape to, and was somehow always waiting wherever they ended up, casual, as if he just liked spending time in deserted hallways and dark rooms.
"And I only want your body," Jensen shoots back. "So you see my point." Jared's father turns slightly to give them both a look, and Jared smiles sheepishly. It's rude to talk through someone else's wedding, but it's unthinkable to talk through one's own.
Part of the problem is that, being a royal wedding, everyone is very interested in maintaining tradition and being formal and proper. The other problem is that, being as it's a wedding between two royals, they have to uphold the traditions of both Genovia and Lycindia. Which mostly means that there are two incredibly long ceremonies they have to go through, and Jared really wants the whole thing to just be over, and he and Jensen can go off to Jared's family's summer home in Tyre.
"That's where I met Danneel," he'd explained to Jensen, when they were deciding where to go. "When we were kids. She agreed to help me figure out a way to hide my identity as Mycroft, and cover for me."
"And you'll be totally safe there," Chad added. "No one knows about it."
"But I should still try all your food, to be on the safe side," said Kevin. He and Chad had struck up some sort of terrifying friendship, which Jared thinks will go nowhere good.
"Clearly," said Jensen. Jared was pretty sure Jensen secretly liked him.
Jensen squeezes his hand, and Jared realizes they've reached a part of the ceremony where he's supposed to talk.
"This I swear," Jared says quickly. This is pretty much all he has to say the whole time. He'll say it a lot, and since it's all about loving Jensen, he'll mean it.
The Lord Chancellor keeps droning on, and Jared sighs, and wonders when they'll be able to leave.
The look his father gives him when he starts slouching tells him that it'll be a while.
*
"I think I need to try the cake first," says Kevin.
"I probably should too," says Chad. "Kev's been a food taster for a while. He might've developed an immunity."
"That's true," says Kevin.
"If he has an immunity, he's a useless food taster," Jensen points out.
"Maybe I'm not," says Kevin. "I bet I'm not."
"Kevin," says Nick. "You tried every ingredient as this was being made."
"But maybe something was in the oven."
"If we don't eat this cake in two minutes, I'm going to kill Kevin myself," says Jared. "So you guys eat up, and then get going."
The Jonases are supposed to be going ahead of them to "secure the property," which Jared assumes means they'll explore and eat all the food and possibly make a pillow fort.
Kevin and Chad try the cake, pronounce it safe, and then Jared and Jensen are expected to try it. All the guests gather close, excited to see their first moments together as a married couple. Personally, Jared thinks those moments should probably be private.
There are about ten thousand people at the wedding, Jared estimates. It's by-invitation-only, but he and Jensen both invited a lot of people, and then there are all the lords and advisers, and Jensen's father wanted to invite a random selection of regular citizens, so it feels like a zoo.
They eat cake together, and everyone cheers, and then they're expected to sit and accept blessings and congratulations from everyone.
"Let's never get married again," Jared whispers.
"Deal," says Jensen.
*
"I didn't see this coming," says Milo, shaking his head when he gets to the thrones.
"Whatever, you're jealous I got married first," says Jared, grinning. "Meggie still thinks you have cooties."
Jensen had been pretty concerned when he found out Milo was coming to the wedding; apparently that story Jared had cooked up about Milo wanting to kill him had gotten around.
"He's actually a good friend," said Jared. "He's going to marry my sister."
"After he kills you?" Jensen asked warily.
"Yeah," said Jared, rolling his eyes, "I require everyone to kill me before they can marry my sister."
"You look like you want to be anywhere else," Milo tells Jared.
"That obvious?" asks Jared.
"Only like five hundred to go," says Jensen, squinting at the line.
"Oh good," says Jared. "You want to tag in, Milo? Pretend to be me?"
"I'm not tall enough," says Milo. He smiles. "Seriously, congratulations. And not just because I'm totally going to be king now."
"Well," says Jared, "as long as it's not just that."
*
It's ten o'clock by the time Chad is finally ushering them into the carriage, and Jared falls asleep almost at once.
It's not exactly the wedding night he'd imagined, but Jensen's drooling on his shoulder, and it really could be a lot worse.
*
Chad seems to feel it would be dangerous to stop at inns, so they just switch carriage drivers occasionally and stay in the carriage all the time.
"I think he's enjoying us not having our wedding night," Jensen grumbles. "Your bodyguard is a jerk."
"Your bodyguards are crazy," says Jared. "So, you know. We're even."
Jensen slams his head against the cushion of the carriage. "We should have eloped."
"Princes don't elope."
"Well," says Jensen, grinning. "I'm a pretty sucky prince."
It's pretty difficult to do anything remotely fun trapped in the back of a carriage, even a royal carriage, but they manage somehow.
*
When they finally get to Tyre, it's the middle of the night, and Jensen is drooling on Jared's shoulder.
"Hey," says Chad, opening the door. "We're here."
"My legs hurt."
"Bitch, bitch, bitch," says Chad. "No one is going to try to kill you here."
"No one is going to try to kill us at all."
Chad rolls his eyes. "This is why you need a bodyguard," he says. "Because you are a total dumbass."
"Thanks for the support."
Chad shrugs. "Come on. Get your sleeping beauty and let's go."
Jared shakes Jensen's shoulder, but he just makes a sleepy noise, so Jared picks him up gently and cradles him close.
"Aww," says Chad. "You guys are disgusting."
"Don't be jealous just because no one loves you."
"Whatever, Kevin's totally gonna give in and get with me any day now."
Jared nearly drops Jensen. "You're hitting on Kevin?"
"He lives a life of danger," says Chad. "I can dig that."
"I am not thinking about this," says Jared. "We are going inside, and I am going to pretend I never heard any of this."
"You know you're carrying him across the threshold, right?"
"I'm trying to ignore that," says Jared.
Of course, as soon as they get to the door, Kevin says, "You're carrying him across the threshold! That's so cute."
"You two deserve each other," Jared mutters.
He gets up to the top of the stairs and gets into their bedroom, noticing that someone--probably Kevin--has strewn rosepetals over the bed.
"Romantic," Jared mutters, putting Jensen down. Jensen mumbles something, turns over in bed, and Jared shakes his head, pulling Jensen's shoes off. "You know," he adds, "this was not how I pictured spending our first night together in a real bed."
He shrugs off his own clothes and pushes the blankets back, scattering rose petals onto the floor. He maneuvers Jensen under the covers and wraps his arms around him, feels Jensen relax against him.
"Okay," Jared admits, nuzzling the back of Jensen's neck. "It's not so bad."
Besides, there's always tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that. They're married, Jared realizes, and feels a grin spreading over his face.
They've got all the time in the world.