(no subject)
Stalked again, a rant by lookstasty.
the_one_king is stalking lookstasty
the_one_king’s REAL name :
Camarillo Hoskins
the_one_king’s REAL DOB :
04th March 1984
Height :173 cm
Weight : 68.8 kg
the_one_king has dreamt about you :
20 times
the_one_king became interested in you :
15th December 2002
the_one_king’s latest dream about you
Both you and the_one_king are working in an animal sanctuary together. the_one_king suggests that you retire to the empty ape sanctuary for a while for a bit of role-play.
This is how the_one_king describes your relationship behind your back
‘We’ll be together forever. I know it. I can feel it in my heart. Thing’s have never been better between me and lookstasty!’
the_one_king’s been stealing stuff from your house too.
the_one_king was seen parading around town with lookstasty’s missing beret.
They’ve even started modifying their body for you
the_one_king is considering having reconstructive surgery on their earlobes so that they are similar in appearance to your own.
They sent the following message to you in a Valentines
Marry me darling. Move in with me. I will do your laundry. I will raise the children! I will do anything to be your soulmate. Do you need a hip? How about a new set of teeth? Anything that is mine will soon be yours.
The Police
No. calls to the police :
7 times
Your Last Call to The Police
"I’ve had enough of this. Send the fucking SWAT team around. That bastard the_one_king has been watching me for far too long. Don’t be stingey with the dum-dum bullets. Thanks."
the_one_king’s Police File
the_one_king may be a hypocrite, a liar and a thief but they are by no means a serious threat to society.
Testimonies about the_one_king
inui_log - Snorts Lucozade tablets
‘I’ve known them both for a long time and I can safely say I’ve never met such a pair of nutjobs in my life. All of these claims are bullshit.’
full__of__woe - Sister Stabatha
‘How depressing. I feel sorry for lookstasty, he’s kind as fuck to a fault. Always willing to give people the benefit of the doubt. All of this sickens me.'’
not_an_otaku - Marathon Munt
‘the_one_king is pointlessness personified. I just wish they’d kill themselves or something.’
notreallyal_sry - Car wreck of a human
‘It’s odd, I’ve known some weird fucks in my time and the_one_king and lookstasty would definitely top that list.’
Really, I just loved the ape parallel. X3