5 months

[lordmachiavelli]

Five months and counting. Still, nothing has changed. (Are y'all getting tired of hearing that yet?) I still have trouble sleeping. I isolate. A lot. I make it to the gas station about 3 days a week, and bigger shopping than that about once a week. I do what's necessary, but nothing really has any purpose or meaning, no real joy or sense of

Comments

[lady_sodayah]

First off if people are tired of reading it, they shouldn't bother reading. They have the right to skip the post.

Second writing is cathartic it often give us a chance to say something that we wouldn't dare utter aloud, so even if you use the private filter and set it for just your eyes, in time it may help you see how far you've come.

Eventually it does get better. It took a friend of mine 10 years to fully come back to herself after loosing her husband, and that was a vanilla marriage. You and devotion had a stronger bond in your relationship because of the trust that she placed in you, it will take time. When I lost my husband, and sub, it took me about 3 years to come back to myself and we weren't married that long. When he died I felt like I had let him down and failed him for not being able to protect him.

Just keep taking one day at a time, and see if you have a support group for people who have lost their long term partners in your area, it helps to talk sometimes and see other people are feeling this too.

[silviar]

I think that expecting yourself to just get over it is completely ridiculous. It was your life mate and love you lost in a tragic, quite likely preventable incident. It will take you a long time. I think the important think though is that you do still go out sometimes. That's the best start you can hope for.

And I still think you should work for a guy who will help you sue the bastards. Most civil lawyers will work for no pay unless you win.

[aralis]

Yeah whatever happened with getting a lawsuit going?

[smf1]

Glad to see your post - not tired of anything about them at all. I can't tell the song though (nothing surprising about that), would like you to post the answer some time.

[mistoferin]

Can't say I remember the title but I'm pretty sure the song is by B.O.C.

I wasn't married to her but I think about her a thousand times a day, I can't begin to imagine what your days are like. I talk to her all the time. I know she's with me...and I know she's with you too. I miss her alot...and you.