Fanfiction: Normal Day
Another side
Hogans Heroes/Buffy the vampire Slayer (Sequel to the Vengeance demon fiction and Carter is Xander.)
Before he could voice his protest, Colonel Klink sneezed violently and his human face morphed into his demon face
Xander Harris also known as Andrew Carter was doing his regular sweeping the office and listen to any potential targets him and his team could do or any threats that needed to be reported to London. He was used to playing the charade of Carter by chatting nervously with the beautiful secretary, mouthing off to Schultz with a grin. He was also used to on these normal days to be called an idiot in general by anyone close by. Most often by Colonel Klink that was being disturbed in his discussions with the big bosses from Berlin. The bosses from Berlin also liked to call him an idiot, but that was mostly because they thought he was an idiot to fight against Germany, that was according to them all candy land and sun shine kisses. He really wishes he could forget that particular pep talk that had been made in front of the prisoners.
He knew instantly that this was not a normal day when Colonel Klink came out of the office and dragged him to his tiny claustrophobic office, presenting the strength of an Ox which he during normal days did not have in public. He shut the door with a big sounding bang.
The silence around them was deafening and Xander groaned at the hint of a sound protecting bubble spell. Did the Colonel Klink not know the chaos he would cause with his team mates, and his very over protecting Colonel that somehow had made it his mission to protect him from the big bad German wolves since the Vengeance demon’s visit? Colonel Klink could have used any of the other ways he had used before to talk to him privately. The kind of private talk that didn’t catch the attention of the entire camp, thank you very much.
Before he could voice his protest, Colonel Klink sneezed violently and his human face morphed into his demon face. The demon face where dark green horns on top of his head, which wiggled like dogs ears and thereby showing off his moods because of it, and his skin became speckled with blue shades. His wolf like eyes, made the whole look a bit more intimidating.
“Oh,” Xander blinked in surprise at the sudden change which he had only seen a handful of times before.
“Oh? Is that all you have say, inexcusable mortal?” Colonel Klink tried his best to sound threatening but he sounded pitiful and his downwards pointing horns showed off his misery. He sneezed violently again.
Xander threw a cautious look out of reflex towards the painting where the listening device was hidden where he knew that his team always listened closely to, in normal cases.
“Oh please, Carter, I am contrary to this camp’s belief; not stupid. The device malfunction is included in the spell,” Colonel Klink snarled, and if it had been anyone else then Xander, who could not read the demon’s face, or particular his horns, they would have wet themselves at the sight of Colonel Klink’s demonic face nearly growling in their face.
“Pure impulse, Wil’halm,” He explained soothingly, or as soothing as he could be and almost smiled at the second snarl sent his way for using his demon birth name. “I feel for you I really do, having a bitchin cold like yours is like licking the peach ice-cream in the mess hall and live to tell the tale after the after-effects. Or drinking Newkirk’s coffee.” Xander shook his head in disbelief. “That man cannot make coffee to save his own life,” He grinned in thought.
Xander was rewarded by a very brief smile from the miserable demon, which made him suspect that demon had tried a cup of Newkirk’s coffee or licked the peace ice-cream, he wasn't sure of which.
“But what can I do to help, I’m not an expert on demon colds,” Xander stiffened as a thought occurred to him. “Buddy, I am so not going out hunting invisible baby Nargles for you again,” That had not been fun one to explain to the Colonel the last time Colonel Klink had asked him to go out and hunt for him. Nargles also happened to be magical quick little buggers that could outrun the fastest airplane. Xander sighed; Klink’s, he will not call them cute so help him God, horns would be the death of him someday. They were very hard to resist.
“But it would heal my cold,” Colonel Klink whined and his horns were doing a little wiggly impatient thing which indicated his want to be petted. “Solution is to have some Nargles, or Kittens,” He looked hopefully at Xander.
“We’ve talked about this,” Xander said with patience that he did not have, resisting the urge to reach out and scratch the horns. “Kittens disappearing into your office and never come back out will not end well for anyone. The rumor about the true heritage of the meat in the camp is already flying sky high,”
“It’s Xtats,” Colonel Klink despite feeling miserable, looked proud. “I hunt them myself,” He added and looked like he wanted Xander to pet him for being a good hunter. Tempting as it was, those damn adorable horns, Xander resisted, because if he did, he would get an explanation to what Xtats was, and he kind of wanted to live without that knowledge so he could eat for the meat for the rest of war.
“Very good of you, thank you,” Xander answered politely instead, because this particular demon race needed any kind of praise to be happy. He kept on being surprised on why Colonel Klink hadn’t showed off his irritation yet on the big bosses from Berlin that kept on complaining on him, by peeing in their drinks and scratch the toxic waste his horns produced during those times when he was angry, in their faces.
The pounding on the door, interrupted their conversation. Xander pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to ease the head ache that had surfaced.
“Fine,” He conceded. “I’ll see what I can do about it. Please put your human face on,”
Colonel Klink beamed as he melted into his human face again and put his monocle in. “I prefer the Nargles, if possible. But kittens will do to,” He waved towards his living quarters. “Feel free to smuggle them through the tunnel that goes to my fireplace,”
Xander realized that that Colonel Hogan would freak the hell out if he actually knew the amount of knowledge the demon had about what was really happening in the camp.
“Yeah, yeah, can you open the door now?” Xander sighed in agreement and the door opened in a blink which almost made Colonel Hogan fall flat on his face.
“Carter, are you okay?” Colonel Hogan asked him with that touch of hidden worry that been on his face since the Vengeance demon incident and Xander nodded placidly.
Colonel Hogan seemed satisfied at the nod and turned his annoyance towards Colonel Klink. The two men dove straight in and began the verbal battle against each other while the rest of the team peeked in from the outer office, concern evident on their faces.
Xander smiled, hopefully, a confident calming smile towards them which seemed to placate them temporarily and they turned to watch the Colonels. He also turned his face towards the two Colonels that were yelling insults at each other and sighed, the sight was a normal thing.
Him, sneaking out hunting invisible magical creatures later on, was on the other hand not.
Damn Colonel Klink’s cute, scratch inviting horns.
Hogans Heroes/Buffy the vampire Slayer (Sequel to the Vengeance demon fiction and Carter is Xander.)
Before he could voice his protest, Colonel Klink sneezed violently and his human face morphed into his demon face
Xander Harris also known as Andrew Carter was doing his regular sweeping the office and listen to any potential targets him and his team could do or any threats that needed to be reported to London. He was used to playing the charade of Carter by chatting nervously with the beautiful secretary, mouthing off to Schultz with a grin. He was also used to on these normal days to be called an idiot in general by anyone close by. Most often by Colonel Klink that was being disturbed in his discussions with the big bosses from Berlin. The bosses from Berlin also liked to call him an idiot, but that was mostly because they thought he was an idiot to fight against Germany, that was according to them all candy land and sun shine kisses. He really wishes he could forget that particular pep talk that had been made in front of the prisoners.
He knew instantly that this was not a normal day when Colonel Klink came out of the office and dragged him to his tiny claustrophobic office, presenting the strength of an Ox which he during normal days did not have in public. He shut the door with a big sounding bang.
The silence around them was deafening and Xander groaned at the hint of a sound protecting bubble spell. Did the Colonel Klink not know the chaos he would cause with his team mates, and his very over protecting Colonel that somehow had made it his mission to protect him from the big bad German wolves since the Vengeance demon’s visit? Colonel Klink could have used any of the other ways he had used before to talk to him privately. The kind of private talk that didn’t catch the attention of the entire camp, thank you very much.
Before he could voice his protest, Colonel Klink sneezed violently and his human face morphed into his demon face. The demon face where dark green horns on top of his head, which wiggled like dogs ears and thereby showing off his moods because of it, and his skin became speckled with blue shades. His wolf like eyes, made the whole look a bit more intimidating.
“Oh,” Xander blinked in surprise at the sudden change which he had only seen a handful of times before.
“Oh? Is that all you have say, inexcusable mortal?” Colonel Klink tried his best to sound threatening but he sounded pitiful and his downwards pointing horns showed off his misery. He sneezed violently again.
Xander threw a cautious look out of reflex towards the painting where the listening device was hidden where he knew that his team always listened closely to, in normal cases.
“Oh please, Carter, I am contrary to this camp’s belief; not stupid. The device malfunction is included in the spell,” Colonel Klink snarled, and if it had been anyone else then Xander, who could not read the demon’s face, or particular his horns, they would have wet themselves at the sight of Colonel Klink’s demonic face nearly growling in their face.
“Pure impulse, Wil’halm,” He explained soothingly, or as soothing as he could be and almost smiled at the second snarl sent his way for using his demon birth name. “I feel for you I really do, having a bitchin cold like yours is like licking the peach ice-cream in the mess hall and live to tell the tale after the after-effects. Or drinking Newkirk’s coffee.” Xander shook his head in disbelief. “That man cannot make coffee to save his own life,” He grinned in thought.
Xander was rewarded by a very brief smile from the miserable demon, which made him suspect that demon had tried a cup of Newkirk’s coffee or licked the peace ice-cream, he wasn't sure of which.
“But what can I do to help, I’m not an expert on demon colds,” Xander stiffened as a thought occurred to him. “Buddy, I am so not going out hunting invisible baby Nargles for you again,” That had not been fun one to explain to the Colonel the last time Colonel Klink had asked him to go out and hunt for him. Nargles also happened to be magical quick little buggers that could outrun the fastest airplane. Xander sighed; Klink’s, he will not call them cute so help him God, horns would be the death of him someday. They were very hard to resist.
“But it would heal my cold,” Colonel Klink whined and his horns were doing a little wiggly impatient thing which indicated his want to be petted. “Solution is to have some Nargles, or Kittens,” He looked hopefully at Xander.
“We’ve talked about this,” Xander said with patience that he did not have, resisting the urge to reach out and scratch the horns. “Kittens disappearing into your office and never come back out will not end well for anyone. The rumor about the true heritage of the meat in the camp is already flying sky high,”
“It’s Xtats,” Colonel Klink despite feeling miserable, looked proud. “I hunt them myself,” He added and looked like he wanted Xander to pet him for being a good hunter. Tempting as it was, those damn adorable horns, Xander resisted, because if he did, he would get an explanation to what Xtats was, and he kind of wanted to live without that knowledge so he could eat for the meat for the rest of war.
“Very good of you, thank you,” Xander answered politely instead, because this particular demon race needed any kind of praise to be happy. He kept on being surprised on why Colonel Klink hadn’t showed off his irritation yet on the big bosses from Berlin that kept on complaining on him, by peeing in their drinks and scratch the toxic waste his horns produced during those times when he was angry, in their faces.
The pounding on the door, interrupted their conversation. Xander pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to ease the head ache that had surfaced.
“Fine,” He conceded. “I’ll see what I can do about it. Please put your human face on,”
Colonel Klink beamed as he melted into his human face again and put his monocle in. “I prefer the Nargles, if possible. But kittens will do to,” He waved towards his living quarters. “Feel free to smuggle them through the tunnel that goes to my fireplace,”
Xander realized that that Colonel Hogan would freak the hell out if he actually knew the amount of knowledge the demon had about what was really happening in the camp.
“Yeah, yeah, can you open the door now?” Xander sighed in agreement and the door opened in a blink which almost made Colonel Hogan fall flat on his face.
“Carter, are you okay?” Colonel Hogan asked him with that touch of hidden worry that been on his face since the Vengeance demon incident and Xander nodded placidly.
Colonel Hogan seemed satisfied at the nod and turned his annoyance towards Colonel Klink. The two men dove straight in and began the verbal battle against each other while the rest of the team peeked in from the outer office, concern evident on their faces.
Xander smiled, hopefully, a confident calming smile towards them which seemed to placate them temporarily and they turned to watch the Colonels. He also turned his face towards the two Colonels that were yelling insults at each other and sighed, the sight was a normal thing.
Him, sneaking out hunting invisible magical creatures later on, was on the other hand not.
Damn Colonel Klink’s cute, scratch inviting horns.