Obscure & British Commentfest 2016

May 07, 2016 09:18

Welcome to the Obscure & British comment fest IV! This is a comment fest for any small(ish) British fandom and open to all fanworks.


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comment!fest, obscure & british

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Doctor Who - Ace / Ray - travelling together (1/2) john_amend_all May 14 2016, 18:52:23 UTC

"This is where it gets rough," Ray called over her shoulder, as she guided her scooter off the road and onto a rutted track. She throttled back somewhat, for fear of a puncture, though with Ace hanging on behind her their speed hadn't been that impressive before. Ace's grip on her showed no signs of slackening, though.
Stony and rough as the track was, it gave out after a couple of fields. Ray brought the scooter to a halt, and pulled her helmet off.
"We'll have to walk the rest of the way," she said, indicating a stile leading into a patch of woodland.
Ace nodded. "Run, more like."
They clambered over the stile, and set off at a pace they couldn't hope to sustain. Within minutes they had reluctantly slowed to the fastest walk they could manage. The path led through what, considered objectively, was beautiful woodland, though neither Ray nor Ace had time to notice.
After a few minutes, Ray held up her hand.
"This is it," she whispered, once she'd caught her breath enough to speak. "We're close."
The two crept forward on hands ( ... )

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Doctor Who - Ace / Ray - travelling together (2/2) john_amend_all May 14 2016, 18:53:11 UTC

This time, she didn't stop running until she caught her foot in a fallen branch and fell headlong, landing in a clump of dock plants. Before she could get up Ace was kneeling beside her.
"You OK?" she asked.
Ray, still lying prone, tried to move her legs. "I think so."
"It's all right." Ace patted her shoulder. "Bobblehead must've lost us ages ago. Where are we, anyway?"
"I don't know." Ray rolled over and looked around. "Oh. Here."
"What's wrong with here?"
"Nothing." Ray felt tears pricking at her eyes. "It's just... this is where Billy and I used to come. We used to talk about the future." The tears were rolling down her cheeks now. "I thought we'd be together."
"Hey." Ace was sitting beside her now. "He's not worth breaking your heart over."
"Easy for you to say. It's not your heart."
She felt herself shaken. "Pull yourself together, Sunshine! This isn't any time to start moping!"
"I can't help-" Ray began, and broke off at a stinging blow to her cheek. Staring at Ace in shocked disbelief, she raised her own hand to her face.
... )

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Re: Doctor Who - Ace / Ray - travelling together (2/2) femme_slash_fan May 15 2016, 01:35:29 UTC
*applauds*

Lovely!

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Re: Doctor Who - Ace / Ray - travelling together (2/2) john_amend_all May 15 2016, 20:08:45 UTC
Glad you liked it.

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Re: Doctor Who - Ace / Ray - travelling together (2/2) liadtbunny May 15 2016, 14:39:16 UTC
Great! I really enjoyed how you rejigged 'Delta and the Bannermen' to include Ace:)

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Re: Doctor Who - Ace / Ray - travelling together (2/2) john_amend_all May 15 2016, 20:09:43 UTC
Yes, I forgot the author's note explaining that in this timeline, Dragonfire comes before Delta... rather than after. But hopefully it was clear enough what was going on.

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