(Untitled)

[lostandbroken56]

So Ive realized that theres only two people in Coventry that she cares about, and Im not one of them. So fuck it, Im so sick of trying and caring, so Im done with all of it. After everything apparently I mean shit it her...so why the fuck should I care anymore

Comments

??????

[vash112263]

what happend.....and who u talking about

Re: ??????

[lostandbroken56]

Its more like whats in front of me, and I think you know who Im talking about.

[silentscreamr17]

That really hurts because i try to call and you cant talk i try to make plans but you cant i spend everyday with people who dont care and people who dont even know me i wish everyday that i could be back there but i cant and i cant make things better but you told me you would always be there and we would always be sisters by heart then i hear dom and sean saying that their not picking sides and were apperently fighting but you know what i dont beleave it because no matter how upset you are or what you say you still miss me and you still know that i will always be there because even though other people would break apart were diffrent and whether you believe it or not you ARE my best friend i may care about other people but not like you you were the only one who was there when i needed help the only one who cared and i will never forget that we have been through so much together and i will not let this end like this if we can make it trough chris then we can handle anything i know its hard not talking and it seems like weve drifted so

[lostandbroken56]

You never call...I would know, unless you dont ever leave a message, which means that I would never know. You dont try to make plans, cause you never call me. You were here a few weeks back but you didnt come see me...you had the chance...I dont know what Sean or Dom are talking about. Ive only mentioned it like once with Dom, never with Sean. Its not only me who realized that all you talk about is Dom and Ceara, thats it. They are the only people who you call, who you hang out with, who you really care about cause they are the only people who you let into your everyday life. I have to go read something between you and Ceara to actully see how you are and what you're up to, cause I dont wanna call cause no matter how many times I call, you yell at me for not calling and you talk to everyone else around you. And you cant bring us getting throught Chris into this...I got through Chris...you are stills friends with him and everything. You became friends with him after everything...I let go. I dont wanna sound like a bitch and I thinks

[silentscreamr17]

i was at cearas party i couldnt leave to go see you and just so you know i dont call anyone they call me dom calls me every night at 8 cear calls me around seven i just called you like two days ago and i tryed for awhile to make plans but you had just started working so i stoped trying and i know you got through chris i ment our friendship but ok i do talk to him once a month excuse me but whatever for you to be acting like this i guess our whole friendship means nothing so whatever you want to stop go head because theres nothing i can say to stop you except weve both done things wrong and im sorry for mine and for the record i dont think your being a bitch your just telling me how you feel so i geuss ill just let go to

[lostandbroken56]

How am I acting? Like I tried and just kept getting shit? For your info, I dont find this argument or whatever you told Dom it was, I was simply stating that I give up. And yeah, you were here for her party and couldnt leave her, but for my party, you just had to run over to her and see her. I get it Jess, I know shes way more up there than me, I mean come on, everyone sees it. Ceara has become your top priority, many people have said it to me, so dont sugar coat the bullshit, she is the most important person to you and it wasnt until EVERYONE said it also that I really believed it. And yeah, I started working, cause we all have to grow up sometime, so Im sorry. And if you think that I feel that our friendship means nothing, then you really dont know me at all and Im sorry for that. I never said I was giving up on our friendship, I said I was gunna stop trying so fucking hard, cause its emotionally and physically tiring and I just cant do it anymore. We are best friends and we always will be, in every lifetime we've lived, I believe

[silentscreamr17]

i didnt tell dom we were arrguing they told me they werent picking side, and ceara was at the end of the street when i pulled up so i got out and hugged her and went to your house. im sorry that she seems higher, but shes like rich i know hes higher then me and i respect that because you love him and i understand and as weird as it may be i love her so im sorry so people may notice it but i really do love her. im sorry for what ever i made you feel but i feel it to, every day i hear about you and rich, or what you and dom joked about that day, or that sean have replaced me with joelle, or that ceara is in love with kelly. i miss you all so much and that will never stop and im not waiting for another life time to find you again when your right here. im not ready to stop trying because you were they only one who truly cared, and if you quit then im alone. i know that we were always ment to be friends your mom knew my mom in high school and you sister knew my cousin and your ment to know me. people do drift apart but this is us and its

[lostandbroken56]

I'll never quite our friendship, its one of the most important things Ive ever had in my life. You arent alone, know that, please. Cause as long as we are breathing, you have me as a best friend and as a sister by heart, always. And so you know, Rich isnt higher, you two are at the same level, but you are there as my best friend and hes there as m boyfriend. I want you both in my life for as long as I live and I love you both sooo much just in different ways. I cant live without eaither of you guys cause it would hurt too much. So no, he isnt higher, you and him are the most important people to me, Ive realized that I cant trust people like I know I can trust you. I can tell you anything and know that you wont tell people and I can come to you with problems and know that you'll sit with me and eat every junk food in the house while watching a movie and just laugh. You're the only one I can have that wicked serisous talk with and know that you know EXACTLY how I feel. So I dont know how I could live without you, without you and Rich,

[silentscreamr17]

ill never leave you because your the only one who i know will be there for me and i love being there for you and im sorry that i havent been latly but ill try to change that only i cant use the phone till my grades go up but i will keep up with on here until i get the chance to call you

[silentscreamr17]

hey sorry i havent called still no phone but i am going to write you a letter i know we always say that but i actully have a stamp so i send you a letter back ok i g2g ill type you tommorow oh by the way guess what im going to florida for christmas i know i was sapose to go before but were all set to go were gonna bring the dog with us ok tell rich i said hi cya