654660 a zombie movie in which there's only one zombie in the world, and it's you

[lostcosmonaut]

      Thought experiment: suppose you support slave labour. You're th captain of a trireme. Below deck, 170 oarsmen row yr boat to war. Never mind -- Wikipedia says that, contrary to popular belief, triremes' crews were composed of free men. Suppose you're th pharaoh's niece walking in th shade of a palm frond held by a nervous Israelite girl

Comments

[slutbunwalla]

wow, I can't even....

Let me just....get back to you...

thirty seven minute space jam

[lostcosmonaut]

take yr time. I did

--mza.

[emamio]

1 - That is a gorgeous lady-face.

2 - I don't know if I agree with you because you write well, or I think you write well because you are eloquently elucidating what I already believed.

3 - Don't leave the internet.

but it would have been lonely if no one had agreed

[lostcosmonaut]

th wife is pleased that you liked th picture, and I am pleased that you read this whole thing, A. For most of my posts on el jay, th comments are their own separate and mostly unrelated universe, but I was hoping that this post would extend itself by inspiring violent disagreement. Mebbe after dinner ......

--mza.

[emamio]

It might be a trait of the breed of mongrel children of immigrants to be inclined to agree with you.

yes quite right

[lostcosmonaut]

mongrels are th only ones w/ stereoscopic vision

--mza.

[inertiacrept]

59 Facebook Likes!

Only through fictional characters are white people allowed to indulge their love affair w/ crime, their uncomfortable feeling that criminals' lives are sexier, more courageous, and more truthful than their own.I don't get to keep this, you know. I've spent six years sitting across the table from actual, non-sexy, completely non-abstracted criminals, most of whom will buck against yr grill even further by being out-and-out white, themselves racists, mebbe even thinking to themselves "Well fuck, at least this faggot DA ain't a nigger like that other one." (and there is, one.) But even a flirtation in the direction of this sentiment has to be one-hundred-and-one percent televised bullshit. The Wire spoke a few truths, sure, but Stringer probably ain't one of them, not because of the incomprehensibility of an intelligent black man but because that dude probably could've stared down the bureaucrats just fine and believing he would be so easily outflanked by white deskmonkeys is several layers of untruth

not that you were a boy scout before

[lostcosmonaut]

yes totally, I don't imagine you (or cops, judges, parents of murdered kids, etc) get to keep any romance going w/ sexy crime -- that sort of romance is just as much a commodity as a Valentine's Day card

and just like VD cards, which keep reappearing every year to satisfy an idiotic demand, sentimental crime sticks around because people have voids & dissatisfactions in their lives ...

When you say that "we actually don't have that much crime going on", are you referring to Portland, or USA generally?

Would you say you're a harder person? I notice that you curse a lot more now

--mza.

[inertiacrept]

Crime is not a good thing about which to get meta, but I'm going to do it anyhow. I'm not explicitly referencing the comment below mine (tho I'm also not ignoring it), but crime is one of those things that turns you into a liar with only a very small amount of indulgent abstraction or applied social theory. There is a crime for every word in the dictionary, as motivation, execution, evidence or whatever - there is race crime, there is poor crime, there is car crime, there is dog crime, there is food crime, there is panty crime, there is taco time crime. When I say that we don't have much crime going on, what I mean is that the actual fact of dudes robbing and raping and such cannot and will not (in the absence of a well and true social collapse) every really manage to match the thundering echoes of their misdeeds in terms of how much we spend on them and worry about them and talk about them and make shows about them

[cowboyjesus]

There is a "Taco Time" crime?

[andrewjvb]

Firstly, how DARE you?! And then I go on a tirade about how you are a racist

spanish priests and their raping white cocks

[lostcosmonaut]

haha thank you for trying to start a fight, Andrew

I think I might be a pretty shrewd businessman if I could let go of some hang-ups about self-promotion, and also if I gave more of a fuck

but there,s some white in me, I am sure of it

Tan white skin didn't used to be a status symbol because it used to mark you as an outdoor worker, but now it does mark status because every fool's an indoor worker, and a tan means a significant vacation

but really I'm just bored w/ most people regardless of skin, and I want more people to drop their guards and show me their guts -- is that so muc hto ask? Keep on keepin' on AJVB

--mza.

[cowboyjesus]

This seems like a pretty decent episode of "Radio Lab". You guest lecture at Tulane's Anthro Dept?

hmongous

[lostcosmonaut]

haha th blue-staters who flayed Radiolab for that episode about "yellow rain" would Internet-crucify this post

Thks for reading, A. -- in spite of being deserted, el jay is still th only place where longer personal writings fit right

--mza.