imma be back

[lostinmyworld53]

so i really want to start writing in my LJ again... but for ME this time, not b/c i have any interest in who reads it or what they have to say about it. that's how LJ started out for me, but then i made more friends and everyone had their say on what i was writing so i began saying things or not saying things with my audience in mind. well it's a

Comments

[imjustjen77]

i'm glad you're writing again, i love reading it

[lostinmyworld53]

shouldn't that comma be a semicolon?

[imjustjen77]

no, not necessarily

[anonymous]

you need to smarten the fuck up. i’ll tell you why you’re crying and depressed. you talk of andrew like he’s your boyfriend…oh i left my keys in his pocket, oh he came over and we fuck. he comes every wednesday, sometimes more. you have your “deal” you screw around and that makes you miserable. you’re depressed because all you’re going to be to him is a play thing, he doesn’t date he only plays because he can’t over that dead girl. you’re depressed because you will never be as good as the dead girl. you envy her. what you and andrew have is the roots of a relationship anyway. he gets jealous when you date other guys so why won’t he be your boyfriend? ask him. friends support each other, friends are there for each other, you claim he is but how many times has he made you feel stupid and how many times has he made you cry and how many times have you complained he’s ignored you? how many times do you not do what you want because you’re afraid andrew will think otherwise and how many times do you ask for his approval? friends don’t need

[anonymous]

i’m not leaving a name because i’m speaking for more than one person. but it doesn’t matter what we say you’re going to delete it anyway and pretend it has no effect on you right? you pretend to be depressed over small shit so that you can run to andrew with your "problems" because if he didn’t have to "help" you, and if you didn’t pretend you "need" him to keep him around he wouldn’t give a fuck about you. you do stupid things like shoplift, and you tried to cut your wrist with an earring, whoop de doo. if you seriously had problems you would use a knife. stop trying to fuck up your life on purpose. you won’t give other guys like austin a chance because you think you’re fine with the "deal" you have with andrew. you talk about him like he’s your boyfriend, guess what? he’s not. you bragged about sleeping in his boxers so don’t even think about denying what i said. its not about him its about you. shape up brittny.

[lostinmyworld53]

well to captain intelligent who thinks i'm fucking up my life to keep andrew around, i really appreciate you trying to make a fun story for me. i don't need someone else to tell me why i'm depressed or how it was stupid to try to cut myself with something like an earring. i think i know myself a bit better than some 'friend' i made the mistake of trusting.
it's ridiculous to hear someone as clueless as you are trying to give me relationship advice and telling me how i think of andrew. you're not "speaking" for anyone. the way i'm running my life doesn't affect you or anyone else you think you're speaking for. i got it under control.
by the way, you're not so good with your commas. we should work on that.

[anonymous]

wow you’re worried about my use of commas when you claim you have so much to be depressed about. can you say denial? grow the fuck up. i’m not telling you how to live your life. just be careful, and for once in your life think. andrew’s not a bad friend, but that’s all he is, a friend. your life is not a stupid game of "andrew says" being his weekly wednesday fuck bag is your flawed decision. if that mina girl wasn’t dying, you would be useless to him because he "loves" her, you would be out in the cold. so don’t pretend like you give a shit about a dead friend of his, because to you all she is a postscript like in your entry: "p.s. memorial fund." ohh yeah that shows you care.

btw pretending your comments are disappearing from andrew’s myspace is a lame attention seeking tactic. it doesn’t take a genius to know that you can delete your own comments. i’m sure he’s not that stupid.

[lostinmyworld53]

your comma usage is pretty bad. i think even if i were standing with a gun to my head ready to take my life, i would still pause to fix up your commas.
i'm not in any kind of denial. and wasn't it a few days ago that you were claiming i was FAKING the depression and now it's turned into "i'm depressed and i'm in denial"? perhaps if you're going to try to give me bullshit on how i'm running to my life, you should figure out your own opinions first.
i don't need to hear your andrew lectures. i know what i'm doing while you, on the other hand, don't have a clue what's going on. you also don't have the tiniest clue about anything dealing with minah. go fuck yourself. i hope someone you care about dies and a friend you trusted patronizes you. think about that, and i mean REALLY think about it.
quit pretending like you care and get your own shit straight. your life isn't as wonderful as you've always thought it was. i think it's high time you gave up bitching about everyone else when you're more lost than i ever was.

[anonymous]

congrats you’re moving on to other guys now that andrew finds you a boring fuck. still you found the need to brag that he slept over 2 nights in a row. wow what an accomplishment. he’s still your one and only fuck buddy. whoo hoo. britty’s growing up. delusional much? your entries are always meticulously detailed when andrew makes his weekly appearance. how about instead of being excited of ‘new friends, new life’ crap you get over “still in love with andrew” crap. i pity him for tolerating your whining.

[lostinmyworld53]

-andrew doesn't find me a boring fuck.
-i saw no bragging
-who said i was growing up?
-meticulous is much too big of a word for you to be using
-you're a fucking idiot if you think my journals are more detailed when andrew's over. if we look at that entry... there's no detail about andrew's visit compared to the other paragraphs
-how about instead of you being so overly concerned about andrew's life, you realize he's a big boy and if he didn't feel like tolerating me, he wouldn't. simple as that. i'm sure he'd be greatly flattered that you pity him.
i have never in my life been so frustrated with a person's ignorance than in your case and my god, it just doesn't stop and you STILL are too much of a damn pussy to use your fucking name. how pathetic does YOUR life have to be to constantly read what i have to say, make up your own stories, go searching through my LJ to find the unlocked entry, and then waste away your time trying to convince me i'm in love with my best friend just because i like fucking him.

[anonymous]

of course he tolerates you because you're pretend "oh i'm alone, i have no one, i'm a pathetic loser piece of shit". apparently playing damsel in distress is the way you get guys. one wants to come keep you safe at night. as if you need safekeeping. you live in decent place. be thankful for it.

sure he doesn't find you a boring fuck thats why he's got 2 or 3 other fuck buddies in addition to you. the times he choses playing pool over fucking you has nothing to do with the fact that you're a boring fuck. sure. you like fucking him because he's the only fuck you know. notice how he's been spending more time with you now that you've got other guys in your life. he's hung out with you 3-4 times this week. a record.

[lostinmyworld53]

all your comments are doing are making me really regret being friends with you. it's obvious you've got some issues to work out and i'm the one you're taking your shit out on.

i honestly, 100% do not care what you think andrew and i are doing. if you had taken the time to listen to me or to listen to him, i think you'd see where you were wrong.

andrew is a real friend of mine, whether you'd like to admit it or not. please stop wasting your time with my life and move on to better things. i'm sorry for what i did to you. and if you would actually like to act your age (maybe a little bit older in your case) and talk to me, maybe things can be fixed and we can both move on.

[anonymous]

once upon a time brittny was a girl who couldn't think for herself and sometimes still is. today, you flip the fuck out on people who annoy you a little bit by not being technologically advanced. can you spell hypocrite? funny.

um lets see. putting up a wall with matt and freaking out over losing andrew as a "friend" (aka backup fuck buddy). maybe its time for you to realise that andrew is a smart boy and he has MOVED ON from pity fucking and its time for you to also. there is no need to pretend that by trying to keep andrew YOURS you will have a shot at him as more than a pity fuck. its time for you to smarten up too.

[lostinmyworld53]

wow, do you even know who andrew is? i don't think you do. he most certainly isn't the guy who is going to fuck me or anyone out of pity. i'm pretty sure you're getting him confused with someone i haven't met. your pathetic attempts to figure me out really are getting nowhere, pal. don't try to look into things so much cause you're just not getting it. also... can we uh... explain what the similarities are here between my indecisiveness and my irritability with people who won't try...? i'm not seeing the connection.

[anonymous]

honey, its you who needs to clue in. you're pushing the limits of delusional. he feels needed by your lame play acting that you're a damsel in distress so he ignores your stupidity and your nagging. don't believe me? ask him for yourself.

the similarity is PATIENCE. its funny how you crapped on the people who won't try when you yourself push people's buttons with your stupid "oh my lord i have a brain but its fucking useless"

[lostinmyworld53]

i don't need to ask andrew anything. i believe I am the one living my life here, not you. i know everything there is to know about me and andrew. i know what he thinks and i know what i think. the only issue is that YOU don't have a fucking clue what either of us thinks yet you continue to play this game.

don't call me "honey". that's a term used for someone you know and care about.